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Sayeon woke up that night in the girls' dorm feeling strange. She was hyperventilating, and there was this sinking feeling in her gut that terrified her.
Was she sick? Did she eat something bad? Why was she breathing so hard? Maybe she could make this go away by having Ryujin punch her again like last time—no bad idea.
She didn’t know what emotion she was feeling at the moment, but it was terrible, and nauseating so nauseating in fact that she had to rush to the bathroom in case she threw up. sitting down on the floor as the crushing feeling worsened and her lungs started to hurt like they might give out any second. But she couldn’t stop—what was happening to her?
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Ryujin woke up to the sound of heavy breathing coming from the bathroom and an aura so nauseating she couldn’t even describe it. Wait, the breathing kind of sounds like…
Sayeon Lee?
As shocked as Ryujin was and as much as she didn’t want to admit it, she still wanted to see if Sayeon was okay.
So she got out of bed and walked to the bathroom—more like speed-walked, but she’s not going to admit that.
When she reached the door, she paused.
Does she really want to deal with Sayeon’s bullshit at the ass-crack of dawn? Not really. But Ryujin was still somewhat worried about Sayeon, so she opened the door to find her with her head between her knees, having what looked like a panic attack.
“Glasses?”
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“Glasses?”
Sayeon could barely hear anything going on around her and almost missed Ryujin calling her. But she couldn't do anything—her mental state was worsening by the minute.
Her mind flashed with images of three dead bodies—Jaeil, Samin, and Ryujin.
None of them were dead, right? But her overthinking only made everything worse—hyperventilation, her mind slowly fogging up. Wait, was she crying?
Fuck, only losers cry. This is humiliating. Everything was getting worse and now she felt like she was about to sob.
But then Ryujin walked into the bathroom and hugged her. Actually hugged her. If Sayeon were in the right state of mind she probably would have laughed. But she wasn't in her right mind right now.
(not that she ever is)
So she just hugged her back, Ryujin didn't make any comments or try to comfort her, she just hugged her, silent, like a blanket wrapped around her, protecting her from nothing and everything at the same time.
Sayeon’s voice trembling and small “What is this? What's happening to me?”
“It's called a panic attack Sayeon. You're okay, you're not dying, it will be over soon. Just, try and focus on me.”
As the panic attack slowly ebbed away only leaving Exhaustion left. Sayeon’s mind clears and realizes that she's hugging Ryujin. So she lets go feeling embarrassed and that pit in her gut slowly returns.
“I'm sorry about that.”
“It's okay it happens to the best of us.”
Well, that makes Sayeon feel better but there's still that small feeling in her gut.
Ahh, maybe it will go away over time. So she just decides to ignore it.
As she tries to get up and go back to bed Ryujin asks if she wants to smoke a cigarette outside with her.
“No. It's not healthy for my lungs.”
“How about…we just watch the sunrise together?”
Ryujin asks
Sayeon pauses at that. Ryujin wanting to spend time together? That's weird but why not try to earn her trust some more?
“Sure”