Chapter Text
The mirrors in the practice room were foggy, the air thick with the scent of floor wax and effort. Haewon watched her own reflection, counting the beats in her head, but it was getting harder to breathe. Every sharp inhale brought a prickly, scratching sensation that made her want to claw at her own throat.
Across the room, the group was focused in their own way. Kyujin was sharp, her movements precise, even this late into the session, while Jiwoo was full of energy, occasionally glancing at Sullyoon to sync their footwork.
"Five-minute break," Haewon rasped, her voice sounding rougher than it had an hour ago. "Hydrate. We're doing the bridge again from the top."
The room relaxed at once. Jiwoo collapsed onto the floor immediately, fanning herself with her hand. Kyujin headed for the speakers to check the track, while Sullyoon walked over to Jiwoo, silently handing her a towel.
Haewon didn't move. She stood by the mirror, her hand pressed against her chest, trying to regulate her breathing. She looked across the room and felt the air leave her lungs completely.
Lily was there, leaning against the far wall. She wasn't looking around much. She was occupied with Bae.
Bae was in mid-laughter, her arm slung casually over Lily's shoulders as she whispered something into her ear. Lily's head tilted back, her blonde hair messy from the dance, and she let out a bright laugh that echoed throughout the studio. She reached up playfully, shoving Bae's shoulder, but her hand lingered there for a second too long.
To Haewon, it felt like something unspoken between them. It looked like a world she wasn't a part of.
The scratch in Haewon's throat turned into a violent burning itch.
She didn't make a sound. She turned, walked, and then ran for the hallway with her hand over her mouth. She barely made it to the bathroom at the end of the corridor before she slammed the door and collapsed over the sink.
A spasm of wet, harsh coughs shook her whole body. It felt like she was trying to swallow glass. She gasped for air, her eyes watering, until finally, something hit the sink with a soft, unsettling thud.
Haewon froze.
In the middle of the sink sat a single, vibrant pink lily petal. It was perfectly formed and stained with a small drop of blood at its base.
Lily's favourite colour. The colour she wore when she wanted to feel pretty - though she was always pretty, Haewon thought quietly. Now it was blooming in the dark, hollow spaces of Haewon's chest.
"No," Haewon whispered, her voice cracking.
She turned the tap on, watching the water drown the petal, but it wouldn't go down. It just circled the drain, like a constant reminder of the feelings blooming in her lungs. It was Hanahaki. It was real. And if Lily was looking at Bae like that, it felt like a death sentence.
"Haewon unnie? You in there?"
It was Sullyoon. Her voice was calm, but there was a sharp, observant tone to it. The door handle rattled.
Haewon panicked. She grabbed the petal, crushed it in her fist, and shoved it deep into her pocket just as the door clicked open.
Sullyoon stood against the bathroom door, her tall figure casting a shadow. She didn't say anything at first. She just looked at Haewon's pale face, then at the sink where a tiny smear of red hadn't been washed away yet.
"You've been coughing for a week," Sullyoon said, her voice dropping to a whisper. She stepped inside, closing the door behind her. "That wasn't just 'dust', was it? I saw you looking at them, unnie."
Haewon pushed past her, her jaw tight with stubborn anger. "It's nothing, Yoona. Just over-practising. Go back before they start wondering where we are."
"Unnie-"
"I said I'm fine!" Haewon snapped, her voice cracking into a painful rasp.
As she walked back towards the studio, she saw Lily and Bae through the glass door. They were sharing a water bottle now, Bae saying something that made Lily's eyes crinkle with that bright, glowing adoration.
Haewon felt another prickle in her lungs. It was a second petal, sharp and ready to bloom. She realised then that she wasn't just losing her voice. She was losing her time.