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Gazing around curiously Ben walked with his parents through the house, surrounded by towering adults. Surely with the sea of long limbs he was being guided through he could tell there weren’t many younger kids around. Being only 3 he didn’t understand why he had to be dragged around with his parents to events like this. And to a 1 year olds birthday? He wasn’t that much of a baby, why did he have to attend if there were no other kids? After greeting a few adults, his mother Leia came to a stop, crouching down and dusting off his shirt with a grin.
“Ben why don’t you go say hello to the birthday girl?”
He scrunched up his little face, “Why?”
“It’s a nice thing to do. You would want her to say happy birthday to you.”
“No I wouldn’t.”
Han gripped his shoulder gently.
“Come on kid, she won’t bite, just say it quick and then I’ll get you some sweets. Ok?”
Ben nodded eagerly. He was a child who could very easily be bribed with food, so if there was one plus to this party it would be the sugar rush. With a little push forward Han sent Ben on his way to the living room. Approaching the living area he looked around curiously still surrounded by giant adults, where was this birthday girl? Suddenly hearing some loud babbling from behind him he turned around.
“BBaaahhh bahh!!”
The little 1 year-old was in a green sundress, a flower crown of some sort set atop her barely there (Y/H/C) strands of hair as she sat in a high chair facing the party. With her little fists flaling around she stopped suddenly as Ben looked at her, both of them exchanging curious glances. Ben had rarely been around babies, his family was always doing something, and almost none of it involved babies. (Y/N) was also a baby that rarely saw any kids of Ben’s age. She had seen her bigger cousins, and all the adults at the Resistance, but this was another human, almost her size. Ben raised a brow at her as she cooed at him, putting her little fist into her mouth.
“Happy birthday.”
(Y/N) giggled as she reached forward trying to reach Ben. If this was the only human close to her size here she surely wanted to play with him. Struggling to get out of her chair she started whining. Her chubby little arms not being able to push the tray away from her. Hearing her whines her mother came over and gently lifted her out.
“Okay baby, I know, I know, you’ve been up there too long. Here you can play with Ben. If that’s alright with you Ben?”
Ben smiled nodding. Gently (Y/N) was set on the soft carpet in front of Ben. She tilted her head to the side as she crawled forward to Ben. Deciding she had to investigate this new person she crawled up to Ben’s legs, placing one tiny hand on his calf as she reached up and tugged at his fluffy brown locks.
“Ow!”
She giggled, plopping herself back down on the ground in front of Ben with a toothless grin. Grabbing one of her toys next to her she started shaking it at Ben, as the little bells inside jingled.
“Dah baav aaggahh.”
She carefully handed it to him as he grinned. Maybe this baby wasn’t so bad afterall.
“Thanks.”
---
Ben looked at the old photo on his holopad with a grin. It was (Y/N) in the grass with him, her little hand reaching into Ben’s slice of cake as Ben tried gently pushing her tiny frame away from him. The look of annoyance obvious in his eyes while hers were solely curious. To think that was only the beginning of their decades long friendship.
---
“(Y/N) come on.”
“Play with me!”
Now 5, Ben was being pulled by (Y/N) to sit down in a little circle of her stuffed animals that she had set up.
“Beeennn! It’s a Resithtance tea party, you have to come!”
“Boys don’t play tea party (Y/N).”
“Well Drun said girls can’t play jedi and pilots, but I play it with you.”
Sighing he saw his defeat, he had to play fair. Crouching down to the floor he sat between a Bantha and a Wookie stuffed animal as (Y/N) sat across from him between an Ewok and a Tauntaun.
“Now, to business.”
Ben chuckled to himself, knowing well that his 3 year-old friend had absolutely no idea what business really meant, except that it was serious.
---
Sighing contently as he set down the holopad, Ben peered over to the calendar hanging on the wall. In the little slot for today was his handwriting:
(Y/N) comes home!
As a pilot for the Resistance now (Y/N) was often off of the base and elsewhere in the galaxy. Much like Ben being a smuggler, they were often sent on mission after mission not leaving them a lot of time to simply be home. A lot of their friendship now involved hoping they would run into each other by complete chance. Their schedules didn’t often align, and when they did it was rare. This time was different though. Ben had gone out of his way to assure he was present for her homecoming.
---
Laying in one of the grass fields at a cook out with the Resistance, Ben and (Y/N) laid staring at the sky. The fluffy clouds floating by in front of the clear blue skies. Ben pointed to one to his left.
“That one looks like Chewie.”
(Y/N) giggled as she scrunched her nose up at the now 6 year-old Ben.
“No it doesn’t! It looks like a fluff ball.”
“That’s what Chewie is!”
(Y/N) giggled with Ben as they both went back to looking at the clouds. In the vast space of blue sky an X-Wing suddenly appeared from behind one of the clouds, whirling through the air as it sped off out of the atmosphere. Pointing a little finger to it (Y/N) smiled.
“One day I’m gonna do that.”
“Be a fluffy cloud?”
“No! I’m gonna fly with the other pilots!”
Ben smiled as he nodded.
“That’d be cool.”
“Just wait and see…I’ll do it.”
---
Her homecoming this time around however was more meaningful than it had been before. Other times it was simply a time for them to catch up over a quick meal then almost instantly go back to their quarters so they could finally sleep. It was the reality of working in the Resistance. This time though, Ben had other ideas for her return. For years things in his mind had been accumulating about (Y/N). Being her best friend, he had to be honest with her about his feelings.
---
Childish giggling filled the air as the two children ran through the tall expanses of trees. Coming to a clearing Ben came to a sudden halt, (Y/N) colliding into his arm and side.
“Okay, okay (Y/N) you count and I’ll hide.”
She groaned, her (Y/E/C) rolling a little as she scrunched up her little nose.
“Beennnn! That’s no fair! You always get to hide!”
“I’m the oldest!”, he protested puffing out his little chest with pride.
“So? Only by 2 years. That’s still a baby. I want to hide!”
“Next round you can.”
She sighed heavily, looking at the Ben, his dimples just barely showing as he grinned at her.
“Fiinneee. But hide somewhere good!”
Ben ran off as (Y/N) closed her eyes tightly. With a grin on her face she started counting.
“1…2…3…4…”
From a little distance Ben turned back for a moment to look at her. Her toothy grin shining across her face as she continued counting seriously. He smiled to himself.
“9…”
With a rush Ben hid inside a mossy log, quietly sliding in so she wouldn’t hear the rustling of leaves.
“Ready or not here I come!”
---
Recollecting the memory with a smile, he walked over to the door of his quarters. Looking himself over once more before he went out, he shuffled his hair and made sure his skin was clear of any blemishes. At least partially satisfied with his appearance he sighed heavily and opened the blast doors.
---
“Come on Ben! Come swim with me!”
Arching a brow Ben, now 15, laughed at (Y/N) keeping herself a float in the cavern water. It was a crystal clear blue with little hints of shimmering sunlight.
“Aren’t you supposed to be at a family dinner?”
Rolling her eyes (Y/N) waved a hand dismissively.
“Psh, like that matters. Come on! The waters great!”
Ben shrugged, “I didn’t bring swim trunks.”
(Y/N) shrugged back with a little sass in her movements, as if mocking him.
“Just swim in your underwear!”
Ben’s smirk started to slowly fade as he turned red.
“W-what?”
“Swim in your underwear! What are you scared?!”
Blushing even harder Ben scratched the back of his neck. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to take anything off in front of (Y/N), even if it was just his shirt. What if she thought he looked weird? He was rather tall and lanky for his age, like he hadn’t properly grown into his body yet.
“Umm…I-I can swim with my clothes on.”
(Y/N) smiled at him as she gestured to the water, “That’s no fun, but ok! Come in then!”
---
With every foot step Ben rehearsed what he was going to say to (Y/N). He had thought about this day so many times before it was almost hard to remember that it hadn’t happened yet. The vivid scenarios he played out in his head had happened almost daily, and he replayed each one over and over in his head. Eventually one of them would be the best, the best way to finally speak his mind to (Y/N). No matter how many words or synonms he thought up in all of those beautiful scenarios however he couldn’t seem to get it just right. It always fell short of his expectations somehow. He absolutely couldn’t mess this up, or he ran the risk of messing up a lot of other things between him and (Y/N). This had to be good, it had to be from the heart and it had to be genuine. Not even realizing how far he had walked, consumed by his thoughts, Ben walked towards the X-Wing landing dock. As he thought the words again he looked up when his shoulder abruptly bumped into Poe’s.
“Whoa Solo! Watch where you’re going! You could end up in the water going like that.”
Ben shrugged awkwardly as he ran his sweaty palms down his sides.
“Yeah sorry.”
Looking over Poe’s shoulder Ben started to try and walk forward again. Poe quickly put a hand up onto Ben’s chest as he halted him from moving. Staring him down in the eyes he arched a brow.
“What’s got you so out of it?”
Ben cleared his throat as he shook his head, “…You know.”
Poe contemplated for a second before his brows raised.
---
Staring almost obsessively Ben, now 19, watched (Y/N) stand in her circle of friends, all in their olive green uniforms about to go to flight training. Her (Y/H/C) in its natural state, her pink lips curled into a smile, her (Y/E/C) glistening at her friend intently, her arms crossed just under her chest, her weight supported on one hip as her stance showed off the curve of her leg. Gulping Ben kept staring as he took her all in. His gut doing a backflip when he heard her laugh echo from the small circle. Training under his father to be a smuggler he now only rarely saw (Y/N). They saw each other in passing usually, partially because their schedules truly were hectic. The other part however, was Ben himself. He purposely started avoiding her, he couldn’t help it. Best friends shouldn’t look at each other the way he looked at her, dream about each other the way he dreamed about her or at least that’s what he told himself.
Wow really her boobs again? You used to build sand castles together, stop oggling at her! …She really is beauitful. …and funny…smart…skilled-
“Solo!”
Instantly jolted out of his daze he was met with Poe staring at him with an arched brow and crossed arms.
“You there?”
Ben nodded as he scratched the back of his neck and returned to the task his father had told him to start 15 minutes ago. Poe followed behind closely as Ben finally picked up the crates he was supposed to be loading.
“Yeah, yeah.”
“Come on Solo I know you, you’re always cool as cucumber. You were flustered as hell just looking off at something…what was it?”
Turning around Ben sighed, giving Poe a look to show he was unamused.
“Just tell me man…we are best friends.”
Best friends, he thought as he looked back to (Y/N) who just briefly glanced at him. Seeing him she glanced again with a wink and a smile, turning her full attention back to her friend after a moment. As Ben smiled, Poe followed his gaze. In understanding, Poe’s mouth fell into an ‘O’.
“Ohh…I see.”
As Ben saw (Y/N) walk off with her friends his expression dropped again.
“Yeah…not like it matters anyway.”
---
Biting his lip, in that suave way he did, Poe hit Ben in the shoulder playfully.
“You’ve got this Solo.”
Running a hand through his hair he let out a deep breath as he looked at Poe with his brows furrowed.
“If I’ve got this why am I so damn nervous to just speak? …I talk all the damn time. Suddenly though…even thinking about it seems like the hardest thing I could possibly do.”
Smiling Poe rubbed Bens arm quickly as he started to walk away.
“Cause it’ll be from your heart. Nobody can look in there…and that’s kinda scary.”
Twitching his lips just barely into a smile he nodded to Poe.
“Touche.”
“Just take deep breaths. You’ll figure it out as you go.”
Ben nodded again as Poe walked off with a smirk of pride. Taking a deep breath in Ben looked down to his feet as he started tapping away, trying to physically rid himself of his nerves.
---
“Ben.”
“Yes (Y/N)?”
“Do you really believe in those old tales?”
Smirking he turned his head to look at (Y/N) in the grass.
“Which ones?”
“Any of them really. …They just seem so…wild.”
Turning his head back to the stars Ben rested his head on an arm he slung behind it.
“I guess.”
“I mean…do you really believe there’s angels out there? …My grandma used to talk about them…these insanely beautiful creatures somewhere among us…yet I don’t know a soul who’s ever seen one. Not one.”
Slowly turning his gaze to (Y/N) who was dreamily and intently focusing her eyes on the stars. Ben swallowed.
“I have.”
Turning her head to face Ben (Y/N) smiled at him, her (Y/S/C) illuminating under the moonlight.
“Really?”
Smiling back at her he nodded, “Yeah…I have.”
---
Breathe. Breathe. Don’t forget to breathe.
Just as he looked up from his feet he saw that same familiar orange uniform coming his way. His heart stopped for a moment as he fully saw (Y/N) come into view. Slinging her helmet under her arm with a glowing smile she walked away from her X-Wing. Ben’s heart started swelling as he saw her moving closer.To think of the children they once were, only to see her now, was breathtaking. She had grown to be so beautiful, she was just as sassy and witty as she had been in her adolescent years. Now she was helping the Resistance, soaring through the skies like she had always told Ben she wanted to. She was one of their best too. Just like she had said. Her (Y/E/C) glistened under the dimming sunlight as she finally saw Ben. Stopping in her steps she gasped slightly. A bright smile spread across her face as she ran up to him excitedly.
“Ben!!”
Wasting no time she jumped into his open arms with a spring. He started spinning around in his arms her as she giggled jubilantly. Finally coming to a stop, he held onto her waist, keeping her feet off of the ground as they exchanged smiles.
“I had no idea you were going to be home! This is so great!”
“I had to come and see my favorite pilot.”
He smirked setting her back down on the ground. She shook her head as she dusted off her uniform.
“Poe’s going to be heartbroken.”
He laughed. With a flip of her hair out of her eyes she joined in his laughing, standing in front of him with her arms crossed. Almost getting lost in (Y/N)’s eyes as she stared back at him, he suddenly remembered why he had been waiting for her. He nudged his head to the side as he cleared his throat.
“Come on fly girl, let’s go for a walk.”
She nodded as she excitedly followed Ben into the treeline. The oh so familiar place for both of them. A place where many of their days of playing as children had led them. Feeling his nerves start to rattle within him Ben slid his sweaty hands into his pockets as he walked as steadily as he could through the overgrowing plant life. Memories of all the years past flashing through his head with every tree he passed.
As the sun was finally setting, painting the scenery with hues of orange, pink and yellow, Ben came to a stop. They were now standing in the same old clearing they used to play hide and seek in. Looking to his left Ben smiled as he saw the tree with their names sloppily carved into it. To most it wouldn’t be very visible, let alone legible, but when they were 13 and 11, that had seemed like a great idea. Turning to (Y/N) he finally pulled his hands out of his pockets as he held them out open to the space around him.
“Look familiar?”
Smiling, (Y/N) shook her head, her arms crossed as she walked closer to Ben.
“How could I forget?”
Smirking Ben paced back from her as she raised her brows.
“Count.”
“What?”
“Count…like from 1 to 10.”
She rolled her eyes with a giggle as she kept her arms crossed.
“Come on Ben.”
“I’m serious! Count, I’ll hide. Come on…for old times sake.”
She arched a brow at him. He jokingly bent his knees, making himself smaller, as he made a puppy faced pout and held up his hands in a plea.
“Ppppllleeassseee.”
She shook her head with a grin, “Only for you Solo.”
He smirked as he stood up straight again. Whirling his finger around, (Y/N) rolled her eyes. Sighing she turned around and closed her eyes softly.
“1…..2…..3…..4…..5…”
Letting out a very stealth breath Ben watched (Y/N) start her countdown. Mentally encouraging himself, he nodded to himself and rolled his shoulders. Quietly he walked up in front of her, his heart pumping practically in his ears as he looked at her counting. Her pink lips moving in a soft sort of motion.
“6…”
He moved a little closer, their bodies almost grazing.
“7…”
Gulping he tried to hold his breath, to assure she couldn’t feel the hot air in front of her. He wiped his sweaty palms once more. Assuring they were dry he quietly started lifting them to (Y/N)’s face.
“8…..9..”
Carefully he slid his hand onto (Y/N)’s cheek as her eyes fluttered open at the sudden contact.
“..10.”
Gently Ben leaned down and placed his lips softly against hers. At the instant contact his gut did backflips, much like it did when he looked at her. His cheeks were flushing red as he felt her grab onto his biceps. Within an instant of fireworks between them, they both deepened the kiss. Taking each other in as much as they could. Their lips memorizing every motion of the others, savoring the flavor. Finally after a good 2 minutes, Ben spontaneously remembered he was supposed to say something before all of this. He so badly didn’t want to pull away, he could keep his lips on hers for ages, except to catch little breathes in between. Slowly he pulled his lips away from hers, allowing her to breathe. Ben swallowed. His heart was now pumping, each beat feeling like it was trying to set itself free from his ribs.
“I…I ..I’ve been in love with you…my entire life.”
(Y/N) released the faintest gasp as she looked into Ben’s warm eyes intently.
“I’m in love with you…I have been for a long…long time. It’s been eating away at me for years…I’ve just been too afraid to tell you…until now. …I just…I had to tell you.”
Releasing a deep sigh he looked at (Y/N), trying to gage her emotions. At the moment she seemed shocked. Her lips were parted, her brows slightly raised, her eyes locked onto Ben’s.
Please…I can’t lose you…I really, really can’t-
Grabbing his shirt she pulled him back into the kiss, quickly giving him a good, sweet kiss as she pulled away again. Feeling his gut flutter he looked at her with his brows raised and a grin on her lips.
“The feelings mutual…”
He sighed with relief as a grin spread across his face. He had done it. He had finally confessed, and unlike he had thought many times, she responded positively. She felt the same way. Just the words alone sent him to cloud 9 as he kept the same dopey grin on his face, staring at her. She smirked, lightly hitting his chest.
“Even if you are a sentimental sap.”
Ducking under Ben’s hold she sprinted off to the side and started running through the trees. With a playful smirk Ben followed behind laughing.
“You can’t say that and just run away!”
“Catch me if you can Solo! Or should I say Slomo!!”
The trees went blurring past them as they ran through, the same giggling filling the air as the moonlight fell over the forrest.