Chapter Text
You were well acquainted with Silent Wolf. A younger initiate of the Kai monastery, still a child really, sixteen. He was silent most of the time, and kept to himself, but from what you learned from Storm Hawk, he seemed to be a good kid. Of course, he was always a little distracted, but you remember how boring prayer used to feel for you. How could you ever know what was to happen on that fateful Fehmarn. Of the brothers and sisters you would loose. Of your own demise. Of how Silent Wolf would become Lone Wolf, Bane of darklords.
But you are not Lone Wolf.
You are Charging Hog.
(Three weeks Before)
It was a calm but brisk evening. The bitter wind blew only above the treetops and wasn't so loud as to irritate you. Instead, it created a pleasant rustling noise that sounded almost like the gentle patter of rain. You however, sat inside, sewing. You had been gifted some yellow string and had been itching to use it for a while. Well, here you were, stooped over in your cell, stitching small sigils of the sun into your cloak, and hoping Brave Blade would not force you to remove them. It was a symbol of your faith, you argued to yourself, not anything that didn't belong. You set your cloak down, admiring your needlework for a while before peering out the window. It was dark and well into the night, you knew you should rest but you didn't want to. Sleep brought with it nightmares. Particularly the same one, over and over. The whole forest set ablaze and one bite of a wolf that always woke you up. No, it was much better to stay awake and sew. Perhaps pray. Maybe The God Kai will bring you reassurance. You stand up, stretch and kneel over, closing your eyes to focus on your words to The God Kai. Not long afterward you saw a dream. You were on some strange dark pedestal, calling out to someone but they couldn't hear you. You called out again and again but no response. You began trying to call again but before you could, you caught sight of a grotesque man with a bug like head you called out again and..
You wake up still kneeling, hands still clasped over beads, grip on them white knuckled, like you might die if you let go. And perhaps you would have. You change quickly into morning robes and hope you have not missed morning prayer. You arrive, late and slightly disheveled to Second Morning prayer, you avoid dire punishment, yet are sent out to chop wood reprimand. You usually don't mind this but today, you are filled with unease. A heavy, cloying sensation of wrongness drowns your thoughts and your senses. Despite this, you chop and return the wood quickly. You tell yourself you must be tired, it's just a normal winter day like any other. However it goes past in a blur of worry and exhaustion. Your sharp senses are dulled, and you are tense as a coiled snake. Still, you continue to pray, work, and scout. You are having luncheon when you finally get the chance to speak to anyone else.
"Good afternoon, Charging hog," to your surprise, it is Silent Wolf. He sits down next to you stiffly.
"Good afternoon, Silent Wolf," You reply, finding it odd he would speak to you. ",Did you need anything?"
"No"
Well, Silent Wolf wasn't exactly known for conversation was he. You watch him eat Luncheon like it's his last, somehow managing to gorge himself on soup. You wondered how his life was like before the monastery. Not that there was much of it. All kai entered the monastery at seven, so nobody knew life without it. It was comforting, in a way, It felt like a family.
",Your cloak is nicely decorated,"
Your eyes almost bug out of your head, you barely hear lone wolf greet anyone, let alone make a statement like that, towards you. In any case, you accepted the compliment, still a little shaken.
",Thank you, would you like me to decorate yours in similar fashion?"
", That would be appreciated,"
Silent wolf finishes the rest of his soup without speaking and leaves. Meanwhile you contemplate the rather strange interaction you had with him. It wasn't bad, just...awkward, like neither of you knew what to say. Perhaps he saw you as unapproachable before. Whatever, it was nice to talk to someone new for once. You have kitchen duty today. Although you'd rather not have. It wasn't dislikeable, but training was far more preferable to it, plus it means you would miss dinner. You think of what to make as you walk toward the kitchen. Already had soup, no way we can afford rice before the feast... decisions decisions. You end up making some boiling some potatoes, mushrooms, and onion, dicing them into a crude salad. You collect the bread, cold and a little hard and split it as equally as you can between all the plates. Doing this alone takes forever, but you manage to finish before evening prayer. You join the other Savants in the hall, most of them are older than you and yet, they assume incorrect posture. Still, you know you shouldn't judge too harshly, although posture was never an issue for you, attentiveness was. You needed to remind yourself to pay attention to Brave Blade often. Still, you had some care in you for The God Kai and what was to be learned from him. You mutter prayer silently. Clinking your beads in the best rhythm you can manage. Your hands shake as you do so, you really should start sleeping more. But those dreams. They were too vivid to leave your head. Too cruel. You never felt rested after dreams like those, they set your mood off for the whole day. Evening prayer finishes, and most savants return to their cells. You do so as well, walking to the main dormitory and entering your own. Unable to sleep, you pick up a broom and start cleaning. There is nothing to sweep of course, you do so too often for any real dust to build up. Still, it helps distract you from your thoughts. Setting the broom down, you decide to go outside to watch the sun dip low into the sky. You prickle with unease, even the beautiful sunset does not distract you from the fact that you are out in the open. You prefer when people serry together. It makes you feel less venerable to an attack. Of course, you know you would be fighting either way but still. The wind on your neck disturbed your bristles to the point you couldn't take it anymore, and returned to your cell. Most others were still awake at a time like this, cleaning, praying, or taking advantage of the free time. You decided to sleep, there was no reason to stay awake, and the nightmares would come anyway. Better not to miss another morning prayer. You hope that there is training today, as it is one of the things you are good at. Mastering your kai skills and working on your weapon mastery. Combat especially, it was something even your sour mood could not ruin. With these pleasant thoughts of tomorrow, you fell asleep.
A thick black mist cloys your senses. It clouds your vision and burns to inhale, you do not need your kai sixth sense to realize it is wholly evil. It gets thicker as you move forward, thicker as you move back. It Presses on you from all sides. Out of nowhere, it releases you you hear the voice of a laughing woman. The laugh rings in your ears, yet you cannot decipher if it is of good or evil origin. The mist seizes you again, you hear the booming snarl of something totally inhuman. As you are released and seized like a cat toying with a tiny helpless mouse. The mist presses on you so hard you cannot breathe. You hear another laugh and...
You wake up slightly groggy but otherwise well rested. Did you have a nightmare tonight? You can only remember a laugh. Oh well, you didn't want to remember. You stand up and gat dressed, this time arriving on time for morning prayer and join your brothers and sisters kneeling. You pray to The God Kai for guidance and protection, same as always. You do not know why these past few days feel so odd, but you believe it to be nothing more than a trick of your mind. The conscious must get bored of such a stable routine. It has to rebel eventually. It shall return to normal soon, you tell yourself. The morrow is comprised of training, as you'd hoped, and helping the young initiates with prayer. You find them so sweet, fresh faced and young. Only seven years old. They shake when they kneel to pray and tell the beads irregularly, but they are trying. Some whisper to each other, others say their prayer far too loudly. A few say nothing at all, eyes focused on their beads, furrowing their brows and biting their lips in concentration. Yes, these were the future of the Kai. You try to remember yourself at that age but it feels distant, fuzzy. All you remember is nagging your elders for food. You wonder what they will remember of this. Will they remember you? You doubt it. You are snapped out of your thoughts by a tiny hand pulling on your cloak.
"Um...excuse me, charging hog," they try to whisper, eyes darting around excitedly.
"Yes, did you need something?" You stoop over meeting their gaze.
"uh...I like the...I like the sun on your cloak,"
"Oh, thank you," you begin to say something else but they dash off, tips of their ears pink as they return to their position. You laugh softly to yourself. This cloak was getting you more compliments than expected. You remember that at luncheon, Silent Wolf was to give you his cloak for you to stitch. You wondered if maybe he would forget, then feel bad for thinking it. You spend the rest of the time until luncheon a little distracted. Mind on that rather than helping the children.
At luncheon, you thank The God Kai for your meal, a simple dakos. Nothing that was quenching your hunger yet you couldn't exactly ask for more. Silent Wolf sits stiffly next to you again, and hands you his cloak. You take it from him an examine it, clean of course, you noted the simple initiate cloak clasp. It was one you also had, and were itching to change, but it would take eight long years for you to reach kai master.
"How long will it take?" asks Silent Wolf, you still hadn't gotten used to him talking yet.
"You'll get it back tomorrow," you respond simply. You wait with Silent Wolf as he finishes his dakos then leave to help clean the monastery. You have a free hour before evening prayer, and decide to continue training. Your technique isn't the most graceful, but the power in your strikes are almost unmatched by your fellow savants. You look for Storm Hawk, so that he may join you in training. You find him sheepishly standing near the younger initiates, clearly a little intimidated on how to handle them. You can't help but smile a little as you watch his hands hover over one of them, unsure how to correct her posture. Watching the spectacle for a bit longer, you walk over to help. You place a steady hand on her back, and another on her shoulder, and gently pull her backward, straightening her back. Storm Hawk watches in shock, as if you had just shown him how to fly. You go around, helping them and reminding them of the words to a prayer. You do this for a while longer before Silver Doe comes to take over, she raises a brow at Storm hawk, who simply responds with a shrug. You both walk out of the prayer hall in silence. Not knowing what else to say, the silence falls awkwardly between the two of you. You remember why you came looking for him in the first place.
"So, would you like to join me in training?"
"Uh...Yes, I guess I would like to,"
The pair of you continue to walk in silence towards the forest. Not having anything to say. The fresh scent of pine fills your lungs and a pleasant breeze begins to stir.
"Don't you suppose Silent Wolf is acting odd?"
"Huh? Why'd ya say that?"
"Today, and yesterday, during luncheon, he spoke to me, properly,"
"Silent Wolf, nah, no way,"
"That's what I thought but apparently not,"
You both set up the area in which you are going to train. It is a small clearing dotted with bushes and a lake in the center. You spar for a while, Storm Hawk is faster but you overpower with ease, one strike on him sends him down. Still, he lands many hits before that, and you muse to yourself about how you must get faster. You both train together until sundown. Then, you return to the monastery for dinner and evening prayer. The evening passes with nothing else to note and you find yourself drifting into an easy sleep.
Your ship is on fire. Drowning, drowning. You need to hold on to that ring. No...where is it. Drowning, drowning.
You wake up gasping for air.
(Two weeks before)
You are in the kitchen preparing for the Feast of Fehmarn. Although its in two weeks, not only will the whole monastery be coming, but also many kai Virin. You have heard your brothers and sisters speculating that the king might be coming, but he has never come for a Fehmarn in all these years so why should he now. Its mostly the younger Intuites who speculate these, spurred on by the Doan and sometimes the immature acolyte. Again, you try to remember what you were like as an Acolyte, but for some reason, your memories of being fourteen are foggy, filled with sore knees and the smell of incense but nothing else. It's odd, you are so caught up in this that you almost stir the dough with a knife. Putting the knife down and reaching to grab a spoon, you think of Silent Wolf instead. He seems detached, from almost everything. Prayer and The God Kai didn't seem that important to him, he rarely spoke to others and, didn't seem to have any hobbies. You figured he was the type to keep things to himself but still, you found this extreme. You return to preparations, trying to clear your head. The rest of the day passes uneventfully, as with most days in the monastery. You begin to use your dreams to keep track of the passing days, with nothing else to mark their importance. Your dream that night was as if you were in a freezing cave, perhaps not unlike those of Kalte. The next, being chased through a desert land. It strikes you as odd how wildly they swing, yet you have bigger things to worry about, the Feast of Fehmarn is quickly approaching, and there was still much to prepare. It was a strange mix of boredom and busyness, your days were structured the same way, yet you found them beginning to grow monotonous, perhaps dull. You threw yourself into prayer in hopes that perhaps that may help, but to no avail. You kept forgetting to return Silent wolf's cloak, and it grew more decorated as the days passed.
He got a new one, eying you strangely anytime you caught sight of one another. Still. You talked often, and you had eventually gotten over your shock at hearing his voice. The summer has begun to grow cloying in its intensity, you are beginning to grow uncomfortable in your cloak. Indeed, many younger kai initiates do not wear theirs for most of the day, only during prayers. You are not sure why you keep yours. Perhaps the nostalgia. Perhaps you are simply to adjusted to it's fitting over you like a second skin. To take it off would leave you feeling open. Like a deerling caught on a frozen lake. Though you have endured many summers like this one before, you find yourself growing less able to support it by the day. Sweat dampens your brow at even the lightest exertion, and you find yourself less patient with others. You grow snappy and tired, closed off. Still, by night you continue to sew patterns into Silent Wolf's cloak. Your yellow spool of thread growing thinner. It is one fateful Kaidag (Sunday) you are collecting logs, Silent wolf quietly by your side, until you are hit with a sudden wave of dizziness. Your arms, already sore for days now, cramp up, a strong round pain pulses through them. You struggle to stay standing as your legs shake erratically beneath you. You clutch a tree for support but it does not save you, you slide down painfully into the dry earth, fingers beginning to twitch erratically as well, you feel the sweat that was beading your brow stop, yet you do not feel any cooler. Your vision swims in and out of black and white. A sharp ringing assaults your settings, overbearing even your sharp hearing and making your vision white out in agony. It is a horrible sensation, you have never felt so weak. You keep your eyes open long enough to notice Silent Wolf turning back for you....
You wake up in the infirmary. It is unfamiliar to you, as you have scarcely been injured. The first thing you notice is that your cloak is missing. The second, Silent Wolf is standing above your bedside. You shoot up like an arrow and he places a placating hand on your shoulder,, then almost immediately recoils as if burned.
"I'm in the...infirmary yeah? With the..." you slur, tongue still feeling heavy in your mouth.
"With the?" Silent Wolf prompts, but you're done talking. Unable to remember what prompted the comment.
"I'm meant to give you water every few hours...I was supposed to do something when you woke up..." He narrows his eyes, trying to remember, you had noticed before, he wasn't very attentive, and you weren't sure that you wanted HIM at your bedside presently.
"Oh right! Who's the king right now?" Silent Wolf asks, a little too enthusiastically for the situation.
"ugh..Ur Um..." You scramble to remember his name....
"You're on the right track!" He says, you wonder if he's actually this oblivious or just faking
"Oh right like Ulnar or something..." you groan, rolling over onto your side ,"How do you have so much energy, you're usually quiet?"
"Oh I'm missing mass right now!" Silent wolf tells you, a jolt runs through you as you remember your duties today.
"We're missing mass right now?!"
"That's right,"
"I was supposed to lead that!" you say indignantly, slightly upset at missing out on your chance.
"Well, they found a replacement so I don't see the problem,"
"Silent Wolf! I wanted to do it!" You chastise, but your energy is giving out quickly and you soon find yourself drifting into a numb dreamless sleep.