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Mizuki listened to the ticking clock in her room. Her eyes void of any emotion that would usually be there.
Since the festival she just stayed in bed. It didn’t matter anyway. Ena almost definitely never wanted to see her again after the whole ordeal.
The look that she gave Mizuki, was that one that someone who accepts a trans girl would give? How would Mizuki know? She’s not a prophet. Guess she’s stuck with her mom and Rui for now. It’s not like she wants to speak to him.
God she was so stupid she should’ve just been upfront with it from the start. The start, the creation of niigo, she should’ve just told them.
“Hey I'm a girl but I wasn’t born that way. Does that make sense?”
Even then she barely figured out what she was. She wasn’t completely idiotic she’d seen trans people online and on TV but hardly did she feel like she could be one of them. Could she?
The feeling, the want to be cute was what she wanted. But she hated her male body. She hated how in her school uniform it extenuated her shoulders, making them seem wide. How it hugged her thin wrists. She was happy when she would be able to throw it off and wear her blue jumper.
She continued listening to the ticking clock. What could she do today? She had been doing her school work (not like she wanted to) so she wasn’t worried about that.
She stood up and looked at her face. God she was breaking out in acne again. Just like in middle school. Her hair was the only thing she kept nice. She didn’t want it to be damaged she had worked so hard to grow it out. it would be a shame to not keep it nice.
She opened a drawer and shook her estradiol before taking two pills and swallowing with water. It was a pain but if she wanted a chance to get a more feminine body like she wanted it would be from those pills.
She turned on her PC and saw the date. August 27, 2026. Her birthday. She had somehow forgotten her own birthday.
She kept her status on nightcord on invisible. Maybe the others would stop messaging her but they didn’t. Every day Ena would talk to her. Well, less talk and more say things in hopes Mizuki would respond.
“Hey it’s Ena. Make sure you’re eating.”
“I finished my art piece for class! Yukihira was proud. Made me feel good.”
It made Mizuki smile. She really really wanted to respond but with what? It had been months, in 2 months a year since they last spoke. She frowned. Tears began to weld in her eyes.
Why was she doing this? Why did it matter? Ena clearly still likes her but.. Maybe she just pitied her? Maybe she didn’t actually care? What about Kanade and Mafuyu? Did they know she was a trans girl?
Mizuki hated this feeling.
She went over to her closet and put on a long skirt, for the past few months she hadn’t been wearing anything but panties so it felt weird finally wearing something over them. Whatever.
She grabbed her cross body bag and left her room after turning off her computer.
She saw her mother.
“Hey mom, I'm going out.”
Mrs Akiyama lighted up, “Oh wow! Have fun and Be safe Mizuki. Text me alright?”
“Will do.”
Mizuki left the house and began walking to the CD store she frequented. Maybe a new imported CD of a band she liked released.
She discovered the band Against Me! Recently and had enjoyed the solo projects of Laura Jane Grace, the front woman of it, and maybe they had a copy or two.
She walked over to the imports section before feeling as if she was being stared at.
She looked to her side and saw Shizuku.
“Mizuki? Where have you been girl? Everyone is worried.. And Your skin..” She touched Mizuki’s face. feeling the small bumps from the acne across her face.
“Right yeah. I’ve been. Busy.”
Mizuki grabbed an Adventure Club CD and headed to check out. Buying it quickly and then running off.
It felt weird being recognized by someone she knew. She realized her hair wasn’t even up. Must’ve been the first time Shizuku saw her like that.
She began walking forward before seeing a familiar brown haired girl in front of her.
“Mizuki!”
Ena ran at her, tears in her eyes. Mizuki looked around panically and wanted to run but Ena quickly grabbed her. Despite being shorter than her she still could carry MIzuki better.
“You aren’t going anywhere until I get answers.”
Ena took her to a cafe and they sat down.
“Mizuki. I don’t care that you’re trans. I promise.”
Ena looked at her. Mizuki hung her head low.
“You Know I can see some of your acne scars right? You have to stop picking at them, that’s how they get worse.”
Mizuki nodded in response to Ena.
“God dammit Mizuki speak! I haven’t seen you since October and I've been trying to contact you! Speak to me please just something!”
Ena sounded pissed. She hadn’t talked to her situation ship in months and the first time they see each other she looks completely in shambles.
Mizuki struggled to speak. She hadn’t voice trained in months so her voice was still a low and groggy sounding voice. contrasting her cute appearance.
“I’m sorry.”
Ena crossed her arms. Sorry? I mean what else was she supposed to say.
Mizuki fidgeted with her nails. Usually they were shaped and painted, her nails were bitten, scratched, no design, plain.
Ena grabbed her hand and looked at her and back at the hand
“Mizuki what is this? You love your nails are you really this depressed? You can’t even take care of your nails?”
She gave Mizuki her hand back and crossed her arms.
Mizuki wanted to cry.
“I stay in bed all day and watch anime. what do you want from me?"
Ena felt like she was gonna turn red,
“Talk to me; You could talk to me? The person who’s contacted you every single day since October? Mizuki; reply to my messages. Speak to me. I beg of you." Tears welded up in her eyes as she looked at the pinkette.
Mizuki didn't know what to do, what to say. She felt guilty for it and it ate, and ate at her. Every day, every moment she felt like it was gonna push her off the edge for not speaking to Ena. The wanting, the needing of their connection.
Mizuki looked back and Ena's face. Seeing how angry and sad she looked. She never saw Ena this distraught. "Ena-"
"What could you have to say to me now?" the brunette snapped back.
"I don't want you to stop talking to me please. I love what we have and you treat me so kindly and I've never felt a stronger bond than us. Have faith in me, just a second chance. Some days it feels like you're the only hope I have even if we haven't spoken." Mizuki looked at Ena, extending her hand forward hoping the brunette would hold it.
Ena looked at Mizuki again, looked down at her hand and touched it. "Don't ever think I'd cut contact with you. Dummy." she pouted but on the inside was happy. Feeling relieved to have her friend back.
"Do the others know that I'm a tranny?" Mizuki looked down at the floor."
Ena glared at her and lightly slapped her wrist, "Don't talk about yourself that way. And, yes. Mafuyu has actually known from the start but she didn't want to be sensitive. Because Mafuyu speculated she kinda told Kanade one night and-"
"I see. I was worried for nothing." Mizuki frowned again.
"We're past it. You're just any other girl and we promise not to treat you any differently please. We're here for you." Ena tilted Mizuki's head up and smiling at her.
Mizuki tried to look away but the girls hand put it back in place. "Let's take you home Mizuki."