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Elder Brother really does have it rough, doesn’t he?
Every time someone asks of his whereabouts, or whether he will be attending one event or another, or even something as simple as how he’s doing and what he’s up to, I feel a great exhaustion on his behalf. If only I could lessen his burden by even a degree… I would happily shoulder any trouble for my beloved older brother.
I suppose it is confusing when I say that, since I — Heiss Arnold Rockmann — have two older brothers: Elder Brother Bill and Elder Brother Alois.
But in this context, anyone who knows us, the Arnold brothers, will have no doubt that I am talking about my second brother, Big Brother Al.
As for why that certain remark has been on my mind quite a lot as of late…
Well, there are no ends to the talks surrounding Big Brother Al’s many responsibilities and achievements. Everywhere I go, I hear people admiring him — everything from his extraordinary looks; to his ranks and titles in high society; to his great, unfathomable powers; and much, much more. To be honest, I, too, greatly admire my big brother. But these people won’t stop talking about him with all sorts of unreasonable expectations and selfish desires, without truly knowing him as a person.
Although I know I can’t claim to know Big Brother Al inside and out, either, I am proud to be able to say that I know at least one side of him that no one else knows.
Big Brother Al is hardly ever at home, here in the Rockmann Mansion. There are whispers — speculations — that he is still haunted by his painful past… his awful childhood and the unforgivable treatment he experienced from our great grandfather Savaia. I don’t know how much of that contributes to the cause of his staying away from home, but when I’d asked him about it, Big Brother Al had a small smile and a distant look as he replied softly:
“Mother and Father fuss over me more than necessary, don’t they? I’m grateful to them for their love and care — but I wish they would stop feeling guilty already. They have nothing to blame themselves for.”
Then he looked out into the garden and added in an even softer voice, as though speaking to himself:
“The one person who should feel guilty is no longer alive. And there is just no point in holding on to an empty grudge.”
What a big heart! I stared up at him in wide-eyed awe, my respect for him increasing exponentially. Seeing this, Big Brother Al ruffled my hair, held up a finger to his lips, and said with a wink:
“Besides, someone’s gotta watch over His Highness.”
…By which he meant our cousin and his best friend, Prince Zenon.
But to grow up into such a kind, forgiving, and loving person, Big Brother Al is truly wonderful beyond anything. It would have been so easy for him to hate and rage and destroy, what with his genius and boundless magical abilities. If it were me, I might have grown up bitter and angry with the world. Or maybe that would have been impossible…? Because the part of Big Brother Al that none knows but me — and now Kees, too — is the gentle and doting big brother he’s always been.
Despite so rarely coming home, Big Brother Al never fails to spoil me rotten. And even though I myself am no longer of an age where being spoilt is remotely appropriate, I fully enjoy the privileges of being Big Brother Al’s little brother and let myself be spoilt to the fullest. Everyone says Big Brother Al is great with kids, and the older women of our household always say that he would make a wonderful father someday. But they don’t know the half of it, speaking as someone who is the direct beneficiary of his love and doting.
You see, it isn’t for nothing that I hold Big Brother Al in the highest esteem and adore him with all my heart. To me, he has always been the understanding older brother, the person I can turn to, the shoulder I can lean on, the one who always makes me feel better about everything. Not only is he a good and empathetic listener, he is also wise and mature beyond his years, gently pointing out perspectives that I would never otherwise have considered. And he never talks down to me or treats me like a child, despite our significant age gap. No matter how small the matter, he never belittles it, and I have never felt rejected around him. Yet he can be playful at times — the cool older brother, the fun big brother, the one who always makes me smile.
Still being a baby, Kees does not know all this yet. But one look at how Big Brother Al dotes on him tells you everything about the big brother he will be to Kees, too. Despite all his impressive and imposing roles and titles, Big Brother Al is never ashamed to be seen in public tenderly prodding the squishy cheeks of our baby brother, or letting him suck on his fingers — all grins and smiles. I may not speak the language of babies, but I know that Kees adores our Big Brother Al just as much as I do, if his cute smiles and baby grabs at our big brother are anything to go by. I don’t even think Kees has ever cried or fussed when Big Brother Al is holding him or playing with him.
Speaking of indulgent little brothers, it’s always been a running joke between my two older brothers. Brother Bill frequently sighs with much fondness that we can hardly tell who’s the true eldest son between them. Not only does Big Brother Al protect our family and household with his incredible magic, he also takes care of a great many responsibilities for our ducal house, and he has been doing so since he was still in school. But Big Brother Bill never resents any of it. The bone that he’s got to pick is that Big Brother Al refuses to call him ‘Big Brother’, despite all his constant pestering. Instead, Big Brother Al would laugh, declare ‘not a chance’, and joke back that Big Brother Bill feels like the youngest child type of an eldest son. But in spite of their back and forth, I know that Big Brother Al regards Big Brother Bill as the doting older brother figure to him as he himself is to me.
Come to think of it, maybe it’s unfair that I seem to have favorites, when Big Brother Bill and Big Brother Al are both my older brothers, huh? I do love and respect Elder Brother Bill a lot — we Arnold brothers are all very fond of each other. But — I don’t know why, and I can’t explain it cleanly — Big Brother Al has always been extra special to me. Maybe it’s because, in my mind, Elder Brother Bill is the future head-of-the-family type of older brother, whereas Big Brother Al is the tenderly loving role-model type — which is absurd, seeing as the latter is far more absent and carries far more on his shoulders for the family than the former. Still, there’s just something about Big Brother Al and the way he steps into people’s hearts that draws people to him. And to his little brothers — both me and baby Kees — he is the loving older brother we instinctively know we can trust and rely on with all our hearts.
I only wish I could show him how much I love my big brother and look up to him, and that I could care for him even half as much as the love he gives me. So every time that he comes home when I’m around and not at school or such, I try my very best to do things that he likes. Of course, I often need help — asking Fezel the butler what Big Brother Al enjoys, and getting the kitchen staff to show me how to make his favorites.
I bet the greater world doesn’t know that Big Brother Al has a bit of a sweet tooth, and prefers citrus-sweet flavors. All they know is the god-like, impossibly competent man who is now the Kingdom’s Chief Mage and the Captain of the Royal Order’s First Platoon — the man who stands by the side of Doran’s Third Prince and Vice Commander of the Knights, His Highness Prince Zenon. They shamelessly covet the right to be close to Big Brother Al, exchanging rumors about his successes and potential even at banquets that Father hosts in the Mansion. And of course, they all want him for his looks and his unfailing manners.
You might wonder if I resent growing up in the shadow of such a great man…? The truth, plain and simple, is no. Never.
It can’t be helped that, of us four brothers, Big Brother Al is the one who resembles Mother the most, and has inherited all of her graceful features and unparalleled beauty. He’s also inherited Father’s royal air and striking presence. Still, it seems Big Brother Al thinks it’s brought him more trouble than it’s worth.
And as for his many talents and abilities, he’s worked so hard to get to where he is today. The cost of all that power… let’s just say it’s not something that I would wish on my worst enemies.
Above all, he never behaves like he’s entitled to anything, always so humble and down-to-earth. His warmth and humility, on top of his kind and gentle nature, make me think that no one is better suited to wield such greatness than my Big Brother Al.
So, no, I have never resented nor envied my big brother — not even when I realized that the lady I fell for, Lady Maris Caromines, is deeply in love with him, albeit it is an unrequited love on her side. And I neither wish to nor want to replace or surpass Big Brother Al in any way, shape, or form.
Besides, for all Big Brother Al’s awesome achievements, he still doesn’t have it easy when it comes to love and matters of the heart. I have glimpsed from afar the way he is around that blue-haired ice witch. Although none of us has said a word of it to Big Brother Al, we are all — the whole extended family and I — very glad from the bottom of our hearts that he has found someone with whom he can behave like that. Truly, I have a lot of respect for Lady Nanalie Hel, but I do wish that she and my big brother would make it official already — though I am aware it isn’t my place to interfere.
For as long as Big Brother Al is unmarried, there will be no end to it. Princesses, noblewomen, and common ladies alike — they all trip over each other falling in love with him. Yet many more people of power are eyeing him for his invaluable position, and aim to marry off their daughters and granddaughters and whatnot to him. With royal blood in his veins and the future of the Kingdom’s defense resting in his hands, his union prospects draw as much attention as those of any crown prince or princess.
But our uncle, King Zerolight, has granted Big Brother Al the freedom to marry whomsoever he chooses, and we are all beyond happy for him. And after that public confession of mutual love they so awkwardly shared…?!
Secretly, I’m hoping that his marriage might see that he comes home more often, perhaps so that his wife and children would get the chance to know us, his family, as their own.
Come on, Big Brother Al! You gotta give me a chance to win the hearts of my nieces and nephews, too. I can’t just lose out to their Uncle Zenon…!