Chapter Text
The Shatterdome appears before him as it did all those years ago, harsh concrete and a thousand memories. He never thought he would be back at the place again, and yet here he is; standing at the docks, looking at his past and facing the very different man he used to be.
“Dr. Wingfield” he turns toward the voice. “I’m Nanami Ryusui” a young man dressed in a orange flight suit and a blue trench coat stands before him offering his hand. “We talked on the phone”
“Yes, hello” he answers, shaking the hand. Nanami is the goose of the golden eggs for his research, better start with a good foot.
“I hope the journey has been pleasant” Nanami smiles brightly at him. “Welcome to Japan, we are thrilled to have you on board for this little project. You are a great inspiration for our pilots, technicians and researchers, Dr. Wingfield”
“Just Xeno it’s fine. And I wouldn’t call your enterprise little, we are talking of seventy-five meters and over a thousand tons of destruction. Each”
“Ha-ha! That’s right! And you are here to make it even better! Let’s go, everyone is waiting!”
Xeno follows Nanami into the Shatterdome, he greets everyone around, walking with a purpose.
“The new Ranger candidates will be arriving tonight” he says. Xeno frowns. “I apologise for not being able to grant you more time to settle down before you find your match”
Xeno stops in his track as if he had been nailed to the floor.
“I think there has been a misunderstanding, Mr. Nanami. I’m not piloting again” he feels his blood run cold. Nanami’s face falls a bit. “I can’t pilot again”
“Very well. So be it” his smile it’s back in its place. “I was hoping to count with such a renowned Ranger on board of my ship, but I will not force you” not that it would be of any use, you can’t force the drift. “But I still want your expertise and knowledge, you are the best J-Engineer, I want that”
“That I can do, I’ll work on your machines, I can lend you some blueprints from my works back in the States”
“I would love to review them, our team has been needing some new upgrades” he stops in front of an unassuming metal door. “These will be your quarters as long as you stay with us, I hope you find them to your liking. Unfortunately government funding has been cut and my own private capital can only do so much”
“Don’t mind about that, your money is better spent in J-Tech. And I’ve seen my self in worse”
“Alright. Leave your things in here, I’ll show you around”
Xeno left his luggage in the small room and followed Nanami deep into the complex, through the mess hall, the training rooms and to the hangars, where the metal beasts slept quiet and cold.
“Ha-ha! Here we are!” He laughs, as they walk over the space on a metal gangwalk. “The jewels of my crown!” He walks towards one of the giants, painted bright green, shining under the artificial light. “Look at this! Viridian Moon! Mark 7! It’s the first research jaeger ever built!”
“Its… outstanding” Xeno has to admire the mastery of the mechanical creature. They are just machines, unalive on their own, but he has always been fascinated by the complexity of their creation. “A research jaeger you say?”
“Yes! She’s still prepared for combat, but it’s not her main function. Let’s say it’s more like… a means to an end. She fights, and as she fights, she collects data”
“Impressive. A revolutionary idea, risky too. You are certainly a visionary, Mr. Ryusui” and also disgustingly rich. A research jaeger… no government would ever fund that. “Certainly elegant”
“The pilots are Suika and Chrome and Kohaku and Senku Ishigami, they take turns. Suika, Chrome and Senku are some of the brightest scientist I’ve ever had the chance of meeting” he says with pride. Xeno’s stomach turns. “Kohaku has been a surprising match, exceptional strategist”
Ishigami… damn. This was exactly what he has been trying to avoid. He should have stayed in California.
“Over there is Ocaso Scream, Mark 5. We got her from Peru, the pilots are Kinro and Ginro, brothers. They are doing… surprisingly good”
Ocaso Scream is a dark blue and orange monster, all jagged edges and dangerous angles. “It’s beautiful. Digital?”
“Yes, we don’t have any nuclear ones. We still have a couple reactors, but it’s too risky to use them. Old tech, y’know”
They keep walking, near the opposite wall are another two jaegers. One white and silver, gleaming panes of metal and polymer; the other smaller, ashy grey and purple, lean lines and faded decals on its surfaces.
“That’s Burya Zero, Mark 4” says Nanami, pointing towards the pure white one. “And the other one is Freiheit Horizon, Mark 3, reconditioned. No pilots yet”
He throws a meaningful look towards Xeno. It’s easy to surmise what he is thinking, he needs Rangers, he calls Xeno: an ex-Ranger, with experience and skill, somebody who knows jaegers better than he knows himself.
“I’m not piloting”
“You said so. I’m just letting you know that if you change your mind, there are positions open still”
The temptation is strong, Xeno can’t deny it, but the fear is stronger. Even if the feeling of the drift—of riding the jaeger—is a powerful drug, he is not ready to face himself; and facing himself is a necessity to be able to mind-meld with someone else. There is a certain level of trust, of vulnerability… He is not ready to dump all of that into somebody else’s head.
“Let’s go down” Nanami directs him towards the stairs. “It seems like Chrome may have finished his diagnosis. I should present you the to the rest of the team. We’ll go to the labs tomorrow”
Xeno is tempted to suggest meeting the rest of the team tomorrow too, but he knows procrastinating will not make it any easier. They near a small group of people at the feet of Viridian Moon, Xeno can recognise that hair anywhere, even after all those years.
“Hello everybody!” Yells Nanami. “I present you the new integrant of our scientific endeavour! Doctor Xeno Wingfield in the flesh!”
“Good evening” greets Xeno awkwardly, with a small bow of his head.
“Hello, Doctor! We are very happy to have you here!” Says a young girl, barely a teenager. She pilots? Is there a drivesuit her size? “I’m Suika, I handle the chemical research related to the Kaiju Blue”
“I’m Chrome, I take care of the investigation related to the kaiju remains, its physical body. Pleased to meet you!”
“Kohaku. I punch things… I think that’s all.”
“Welcome to our humble Shatterdome! It’s been so long Doc!” Senku is smiling wickedly. He is taller, but hasn’t changed much in the rest. “Are you here to show us how it’s done?”
“Hmm… not really. I’m here to update the older jaegers. Hello Senku” he says. Senku hasn’t moved away from him, nor showed anger towards him, nor talked about the elephant between them. It is only their first meeting and Xeno doesn’t want to get ahead of himself, but maybe it is a good thing. “I don’t pilot anymore, but I’ll make sure your tall friends over here have all the state of the art weaponry ready”
“Damn. Thats a great lose for the Ranger team” chimes Kohaku. “I’ve seen the recordings of your fights, that one against Hammertail gave me the chills”
“You fought Hammertail?! I’ve been obsessed with that one since I was a kid!” Yells Chrome, possessed by an uncontrollable excitement. “The mineral composition in that one was something never seen before!”
Before Chrome has the chance to throw himself into a questioning rampage, a loud buzzer lets itself be heard. All the personnel around begins putting their things away and trickling out of the hangar.
“That’s dinner!” Yells Ryusui. “Let’s go! Dr. Xeno, I guarantee our food here is delicious!”
Xeno can’t find a way out of dinner, he’s not hungry and the long trip by boat has left him feeling dizzy. Food is the last thing in his mind. He manages to evade the other scientists as they make their way towards a table, he is not in the mood for an interrogation about his previous life as Ranger. He doesn’t mind talking about Hammertail or any of the other previous kaijus, but it’s inevitable that the last fight and the destruction of Shōri Rampage gets brought up. And he doesn’t want to talk about it. Not in front of Senku.
He gets his food and retreats towards a small table close to the corner, under a broken lamp. It’s less bright in there. He takes out his field journal and begins tacking notes about the jaegers as he eats. He’s making a small schematic of Burya Zero’s head when a shadow covers the page. Xeno lifts his head and faces the last person he was expecting.
“Stan?”
“Hello, Xeno” he smiles a bit. “Is this seat taken? May I eat with you?”
“By all means, please”
Xeno closes his notebook and frees a space for him in the small table. How long it’s been since the last time they spoke? At least a couple years. And another couple since they saw each other in person. No, more, probably closer to three. He looks the same—blond hair, purple lipstick, dark clothing—but there is a new addition to his face, a few lines across his cheeks and the bridge of his nose, like cracks on a rock or drips of ink.
“I heard you came in today too” says Xeno after a few minutes of awkward silence. “How’s the trip been”
“Terrible, we got an awful storm in the middle. Yours?”
“Only slightly better, but probably because I fell asleep in the first five minutes”
They fall silent again. Munching on their potatoes. Are the marks a new makeup style? Maybe a tattoo? Kaiju Blue?
“I’m sorry I didn’t call you these past years” says Stanley in a low voice. “Life got in the way and didn’t know what to say”
“Don’t worry, I understand. Life got in the way for me too” it’s impossible he doesn’t know about it, about the accident, it came up in all media outlets—as every other kaiju fight did. Only that one ended in mutual annihilation.
“I kept telling myself to ‘just call’. But I couldn’t”
“I gave an ultimatum to myself, to call you by the end of the week. I think I’ve given like six ultimatums”
Stanley smiles, shaking his head in incredulity. “We are so stupid”
“Yes we are” Xeno smiles too. “At least we don’t have to call anymore, I hate the phone. My room is 0691”
“0683” offers Stan. “Right across the hall it seem”
“Less chance to get in trouble for being out of our beds after curfew”
“We are adults, Xeno. We don’t have a curfew anymore”
“I really hope you are right” he remembers all the times they got caught being in a place they shouldn’t have been back at the Los Angeles Shatterdome, and they had been adults too. “I’m guessing you are here to pilot?”
“Yes I am. But I need to find a copilot” he sends a long look towards Xeno. He pretends he doesn’t feel it. “Last one won’t drift with me anymore”
“That’s unfortunate” Xeno doesn’t pry, and hopes Stanley doesn’t either. “I don’t pilot anymore, left the Rangers. I’m on tech support now”
“You are?” He waits a short moment, in case Xeno wants to elaborate, but when he doesn’t he takes it in stride and keeps talking. “That’s a loss for the Rangers, but a win for the jaegers. You were always great with your designs. I really want to see what kind of madness you’ve created. Please let it be a chainsaw-sword”
“It is not”
“Aww!”
“Stanley! A chainsaw-sword doesn’t contain the Blue! Be realistic”
“I’m being realistic! Some kaijus have a shell. I fought Panzerkopf, y’know?” Xeno knows. They might have not called, but he followed the fights. “That was hard”
Xeno huffs a small laugh. “I’ll keep it in mind. For now I’m working in this ultrasound system, it’s inspired by the sonar of some cetaceans. They can project ultrasounds at frequencies that stuns and damage their prey internal organs. I thought it would be useful to fight the kaijus minimising the Kaiju Blue contamination risk”
“You pretend to liquify the kaiju’s brains inside their skulls” Stanley lifts his eyebrows. “That’s cool”
“Unfortunately it also liquifies the brains of everyone else, I can’t seem to be able to shield the con-pod enough to withstand the reverberation”
“That’s seems unfortunate. Do noise-cancelling headphones have any effect?”
“Not really. Hearing the sound is not the problem, but the frequency in itself. It travels through all surfaces, it can reach your insides without going through your ears” Xeno opened the notebook again and began drawing. “Noise-cancelling headphones work by creating a wave opposite to the one existent, that way they nullify each other. For that technology to work it would be necessary to make the whole con-pod to vibrate in the… let’s call it opposite direction for simplicity. But then you’ll still have the same problem inside, only with a reverse wave”
“Seems problematic”
“It is. But I also had this idea for a plasma gun, you’ll see, it’ll be amazing. I just need to find a way to keep the jaeger from malfunctioning due to the shock wave”
Stan began laughing, silent and covering his face as if he didn’t want anyone to see him expressing any kind of emotion.
“What now, Stan? What did I say that was so funny”
“Nothing, nothing” but he’s still laughing. “It’s just how you can obliterate the kaijus by yourself, but the jaegers get in the way. It’s kind of stupid”
“It kind of is, yeah” he imagines weapons so powerful no alien from the rift can survive, but also no human can withstand, not even inside the powerful embrace of a machine made to fight a tornado. “Maybe I need to be a bit more realistic. I’m here only to put the older models up to date. You know they have a Mark 3? She’s been modified from nuclear to digital, I really want to see how it’s been done”
By the time they finish their food, the mess it’s almost empty and a couple workers of the cleaning staff are throwing dirty looks at them as they wait for the room to be empty to finally start their work.
When Xeno finally reaches his room and closes the door behind him he realises two things: the first one, is that his luggage is still packed and he has to unpack to find his toothbrush; the second one, is that he has spent almost two hours talking nonstop about jaeger weaponry instead of interesting himself in Stan’s life, whom he hadn’t seen in years. What a fucking self absorbed idiot.
He really doesn’t know when to shut up, does he?