Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Cuc hated nightmares.

He hated how terrifying they were and how uncomfortable they made him feel afterwards. He hated the way they lingered on even after he’d fallen asleep again, when he’d thought that unpleasant stretch of his slumber was over and done with.

He thought he had moved on from those nightmares. After all, that was precisely the reason he’d packed his bags and moved all the way across the ocean, the reason he’d turned his back on his own hometown, never to return. He thought his mental state had improved significantly with the start of his new life, but apparently it was nowhere close to the change he’d hoped for.

All because those stupid nightmares returned, for no reason at all but definitely with a vengeance.

______________

It was a quiet evening when power suddenly went out.

Cuc didn’t remember what he’d been doing before, nor did he find it weird that he’d forgotten about it so quickly. His whole room was rendered pitch black, made even darker by the moonless, starless night outside his window and, oddly enough, no additional light source from anywhere in his neighborhood.

Cuc never liked the dark. It was far too quiet and empty, a perfect environment for his thoughts to spiral. Which was why he’d stashed a number of battery lights around his unit like one would with self-defense weapons. They were, in a way, his personal method of self-defense.

Flailing his arms wildly in the dark, Cuc inched his way towards a nearby drawer. Right, he was on his desk earlier doing… something, and there should be a drawer nearby if his memory served him right. It took a few tries for him to finally feel the handle in his grasp, and in one swift motion he pulled the drawer open and dove his hand into its contents.

Pens, markers, rulers, (he really should’ve been more organized), some kind of box, an eraser, and- what’s this?

He felt some kind of plastic cylinder-shaped thing in the palm of his hand, which revealed itself to be a flashlight once it was out of the drawer. A sigh of relief escaped him as he quickly found the knob to turn it on, white light illuminating his room and slowing down his heartbeat in an instant.

Now with some kind of light on, he could go on with his task at last. If only he remembered what it even was-

“Cuc.”

He immediately pointed his flashlight to where he’d heard the noise, only to see his bedroom wall and nothing else. A chill ran down his spine as his mind replayed the shrilling voice, which he soon brushed off with a shake of his head. It’s nothing, he thought to himself, must’ve been the wind.

Only that his window was closed and his fan wasn’t on at the time.

Cuc felt a cold touch on his shoulder, a soft breeze that somehow pierced through his flesh and ran down his spine. His heart stopped as he felt the very same breeze against the back of his neck, rhythmically chilling him to the bone alongside what had sounded like soft exhales behind his ear.

It was as though something, or someone, was breathing down his neck.

Cuc gulped. His heart was beating so fast he could feel it thumping in his ears. He convinced himself that it was nothing, that the eerie dead of the night had driven him mad and gotten him to imagine things. He would turn around to see nothing but the white wall of his room, because whatever he was sensing was just a figment of imagination coming from his tired brain.

One second, then two, then three. Then he swiftly turned around with his flashlight. Just like what he’d been trying to convince himself, there was nothing but a plain wall and a few posters taped onto it. A sigh of relief came one second too early, however, as his gaze landed on the ceiling. 

On a pair of glowing eyes staring back.

The eyes revealed themselves to be those of a shadow, whose head turned itself upside down as it crawled down the wall. Long, skinny limbs attached themselves to the wall one step at a time, inching its way downward and all the way to the bright spot left by the flashlight. 

And from the light revealed a bony creature wrapped in blackened skin, flaking and tearing as though burned to a crisp. Its mouth tore open from the skin-like seal, spewing blood out from its lips as it did so, before repeating itself once more.

“CUC!”

Cuc fell from his chair. It was enough to snap him out of his frozen state and bring back the wits in him to run. Fear seemingly knocked the strength out of his legs as he continuously tumbled and fell, unable to do anything but crawl as the creature made its way forward. Reaching the door at last, he tried to pry it open only to burn himself; the door handle seemingly becoming a thousand degrees hotter all of a sudden. Panic didn’t even have time to settle in when a hand grabbed the collar of his shirt and threw him back, and soon enough he was at the mercy of his tormentor.

The bony fingers wrapped themselves around Cuc’s neck and pressed, blocking air from entering his lungs. The grip on his throat burned, figuratively and literally. There was also some kind of hot liquid pouring on his nose down to the sides of his face, some dyeing his swimming surroundings red, but Cuc couldn’t see what it was through his own tears and the black spots dancing in his vision.

It was through some miracle that he could still hear what it was saying. And despite its wrangled and distorted voice, he could make out each and every word.

“YOU LEFT ME YOU LEFT ME YOU LEFT ME!! WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME?! WHY DID YOU NOT COME BACK FOR ME??! TRAITOR! TRAITOR!!! YOU WILL PAY!! I WILL MAKE YOU PAY!!!!”

He felt the grip on his throat loosening, just as his vision began to clear up. Other than a face full of horrors beyond words to describe, the last thing Cuc saw was his attacker’s claw, high up in the air before thrusting itself straight down to his face.

…

Cuc woke up with a scream.

He clutched his chest to calm the rapid beating of his heart, heaving and panting just as fast to get some air into his lungs. His breathing was shallow and only seemed to quicken with each second passed, bringing him closer and closer to hyperventilation much as he tried to fight back.

Then he remembered the exercise the school counselor had taught him, and with the little rationality his panicking brain still managed to grasp, he forced himself to begin.

Five things you can see.

Five? How could he see five of anything in the darkness of his room? Before the panic took over, however, his eyes managed to find their way to a plug-in nightlight by the corner of his bed. Right, he’d always had those on!

The nightlight was one, next to it was the bedside drawer. So that was two. On top of it was an alarm clock (three), his charging phone (four), and a small lamp (five).

Cuc immediately turned on the lamp, pouring as much light into his room as possible. There was no one else there but him and his shivering figure, but that didn’t mean he wanted to put himself back into the darkness at the moment. His breathing steadied as he took in the familiarity of his tiny bedroom, blurry surroundings slowly materializing as his eyes got themselves used to the sudden brightness.

Four things you can touch.

His blanket was one since he was already gripping it so hard with one hand. The other was on his chest to soothe his breathing, making it two. Slowly, he moved his hand up to sense his own face, both to count it as the third object and to see if any of his features had been distorted. There seemed to be none. 

Upon the fourth item that was his hair, specifically the tiny braid that he’d forgotten to undo before bed for the millionth time, Cuc muttered under his breath: “Three things you can hear.”

The fan. His own voice. The ticking of his clock. The overall view of his bedroom became more and more coherent as time went on, reassuring him once again that he was safe and sound in his home. One that did not have any monsters chasing him, hopefully…

Two things you can smell.

He pressed his face into his pillow, letting the whiff of fabric invade his nostrils. It smelled familiar even if plain, which he didn’t mind. The hand that was grabbing his blanket pulled it up for him to smell also: it had the exact same scent as the pillow, but he was willing to count that by virtue of being two different items. He didn’t want to leave his bed just to grab a floral air freshener, anyway.

And now for the final step: one thing he could taste. It was far too late into the night to sense anything left from his dinner, tasting nothing but plain saliva in his mouth. It felt dry, too, and for a brief moment he contemplated getting up for some water.

Then the image of that creature came back to invade his mind.

Nope.

He pulled his blanket high up to his neck, hoping the comforting weight against his whole body would lull him to sleep or, at the very least, protect him from getting dragged away. And with his nightmare gone and his attack dealt with, he closed the lid of his eyes.

It was dark again, but it was the darkness he had to get used to by this point.

_____________

Cuc, in fact, did not sleep well.

The only good news was that he didn’t have to go through a second nightmare in a row, but perhaps that was solely because he couldn’t sleep at all. He tossed and turned, his eyes sewn shut yet his brain aware. Too aware. It got to the point where he had to get up and do some pre-class readings just to kill some time, and before he knew it he dozed off right on his table with drool all over his books.

Overall, this whole mess had left him with three hours of sleep, a horrible posture, and nothing drilled into his mind. What a way to start a new school day.

He went through his day in a constantly dazed manner, the passage of time reduced to no more than a fever dream. Making the day go by faster was probably the only good thing to come out of that experience, at the very least.

Before he knew it, it was lunch time. Cuc yawned for probably the millionth time, mouth hung wide open without a care for common courtesy. It didn’t even register to him that a bug might easily fly straight into his throat when he did this, but perhaps that would actually help him wake up for once. 

Thankfully it wasn’t a bug that snapped him out of his exhaustion, but a sudden touch of cold against his cheek. Cuc flinched, blinking the sleepy tears out of his eyes as he sealed his mouth shut. Only when his surroundings cleared themselves up did he realize he wasn’t alone.

“Wake up, sleepyhead.” 

He turned to see his best friend Kazu next to him, holding a bottle of iced tea that also functioned as his wake up call. The boy was staring at him with his mouth pressed into a thin line, an expression that read somewhere between critical and amused. 

“Why so tired? Did you stay up late or something?” he cocked his head to the side. “Don’t tell me you’re still trying to finish the last few episodes of ‘Headlong Rush!’ just to talk about spoilers with me.”

“Cuc couldn’t sleep,” Cuc replied, followed by a pause. He didn’t know which was worse: admitting that he was still scared of nightmares like a child or lying about a bad habit he didn’t even have. After a second or two of debating, he finally had an answer, “…Nightmares.”

“Oh,” Kazu’s tone softened considerably, “have you, um, talked to the counselor about it?”

“Mm hmm,” the blonde nodded. The lack of further elaboration was enough to tell his friend how well that worked.

“Okay,” Kazu averted his gaze, focusing instead on his lunchbox. Both boys went somber all of a sudden, much to Cuc’s displeasure. He would much rather Kazu had made fun of his fear of nightmares than him being sad about it; at least the latter meant that his issues weren’t significant enough to bring down anyone’s mood.

But then again, he’d let Kazu know he was visiting a counselor because he trusted Kazu. While he’d made himself a sizable friend group ever since he stepped foot in this foreign land, no one knew about this except for the boy. Kazu felt safe, Kazu felt trustworthy, and - once he’d overcome the hurdle that was his initial crankiness - Kazu was kind. He understood without pitying, listened without talking over. Underneath a serious and at times temperamental front lay a caring soul, and Cuc couldn’t ask for anything more than that.

Given time, Cuc would be ready to tell him about his full past.

But now was not the time. Not yet.

“It’s okay, Kazu. It’s nothing,” he said, as an effort to break the tension. “Cuc will be fine.”

The brunette bit the inside of his cheek, brows still furrowing with much thought. Cuc gave him a small smile in response, hoping that was enough to convince his worrying friend.

“You can’t… be so sure of that,” Kazu frowned. “What if you get another nightmare?”

“Cuc will find a way.”

Another round of staring. If he were honest, Cuc didn’t know what else to say for his friend to relax. 

“Or maybe,” Kazu finally spoke, voice trailing as he went on, “we can do a sleepover?”

“Hanya?”

“Like… you can stay over at my place. Or me at yours, it doesn’t really matter,” the boy averted his gaze, pink spreading across his cheeks. “I just thought it’d be better if you weren’t completely alone. I heard your host family is out of town and the counselor didn’t really help, so…”

Cuc blinked. Never once had he heard of using sleepovers as a way to combat nightmares, but then again Kazu was correct that he was all alone at home right now. In the darkness of his room where there was no one else around, Cuc admittedly felt isolated from time to time.

Maybe that was why his nightmares were so tough to deal with: he had no one to comfort him. Much as he would hate to disturb Kazu with his panic attacks, and heaven forbid they occur in the middle of the night, Cuc thought that having someone he trusted by his side would make them easier to handle even just for a bit.

“But it’s okay if you’re not comfortable! It’s just a suggestion!” Kazu waved a hand in front of his face, clearly awkward from Cuc’s lack of response. “Sorry if that seems out of pocket. I just thought that if I were there I could-”

“Cuc doesn’t mind.”

“Well, yeah, but-” Kazu then did a double take, “wait, what?”

“Cuc doesn’t mind,” the blonde repeated. “Kazu… come to Cuc’s place?”

“Ah- Oh, sure!” his friend found the words at last. “I’ll have to let Nagomu nii-san know first, but other than that I’m down.”

“Van!” Cuc raised a fist pump in the air. He was glad to have suggested his place before Kazu did, or else he’d be making the entire Hiryuu family handle his burden for no justifiable reason. And plus, a part of him wanted a sleepover with just Kazu, with no one else but just the two of them in their own world. He could imagine it already: the study sessions, the fun little games they’d have. Maybe they could even finish ‘Headlong Rush!’ just as they’d always wanted!

“Great!” Kazu smiled also, relaxing considerably, “I’ll just go back home after school to prepare my stuff, and then I’ll see you at-”

Distant squeals and giggles cut him off. Both boys turned their attention towards an open classroom window right by their bench, behind which sounded incoherent voices of their fellow students.

“—be quiet!”

“—aren’t you laughing way too much—”

“—shhh! It’s gonna hear—”

“—AHH! It moved—”

“Ugh, what a bother,” muttered Kazu.

“What’s going on?” asked Cuc.

“They’re probably playing kokkuri-san or something,” Kazu plopped a piece of fried egg into his mouth. “It’s stupid, really.”

“Kokkuri…?” Cuc hummed, “What’s that?”

“It’s just one of those dumb ghost summoning games. Supposedly you invite a spirit over and it can communicate with you through a coin and a piece of paper.”

“Is it like the thing where you…” Cuc then made a sliding gesture in the air with both his hands.

“Yep, that one,” Kazu replied, seemingly getting what Cuc was trying to convey. 

“Ohh,” the blonde nodded along, in full belief that Kazu did, in fact, know exactly what he was talking about. He then followed up with another question: “Kazu believe in ghosts?”

“Nope.” 

“Why?”

“Never seen one,” answered his friend matter-of-factly. “There’s just no evidence to suggest they’re real. All the ghost hunting and sightings you see online are probably just hoaxes anyway.”

“Ah,” was the only thing Cuc could respond to that. He was neutral on the matter, really, though some of those supposed ‘caught on camera’ supernatural occurrences did spook him out from time to time. He made sure to stray far away from them just to avoid another nightmare on top of the ones he’d already had.

Still, he gave his best friend a nudge, grinning playfully, “Kazu want to see a ghost?”

“Ew, why would I want that?” 

“Kazu scared?”

“No!” the brunette shoved his friend in the arm, light enough so neither him nor his lunch fell off. It got a laugh out of Cuc, the first on such an exhausting day. Kazu couldn’t have it in him to take offense for any longer, and soon a smile bloomed on his face also. He knew he couldn’t do much to take away all the pain and anxiety his best friend had gone through for the past few days, but he was glad he was able to alleviate it somewhat.

And soon came the signal for the next period. The boys put away their lunch accordingly, eager to finish the day as soon as they could. Cuc now found himself freshened and awake, and it was no small part thanks to the kind soul that was his best friend Kazu.

Even if he did notice a pair of glowing spheres peeking through the darkened classroom window, he pushed it to the back of his mind for now.

_____________

On the bus ride home, Cuc let his mind wander. He thought about Kazu, about the way he’d so casually suggested a sleepover just to keep Cuc company. Words alone could never describe how much he appreciated the sentiment; he’d never thought he would ever be able to gain such a compassionate and understanding friend since…

Since…

Cuc forced himself to think of something else. Stick to the lunch conversation, he thought. The sleepover talk was done already, and after that came kokkuri-san, which he came to learn was a ghost-summoning game.

He wondered if ghosts were real. Kazu said there wasn’t any evidence that they were, but at the same time he didn’t have anything else to back up why they weren’t, either. From the common definition, ghosts were spirits of the dead that lingered on the mortal realm due to unfinished businesses. How would they be able to resolve their issues without a physical body, then? What good could they even do with moving random objects, possessing creepy-looking toys, or…

Haunting people’s dreams…?

Cuc sat up straight on his seat, heart pounding against his chest. Yesterday’s nightmare… the creature that tried to kill him there… It wasn’t the first time he’d seen it. It had appeared several times before, carrying the same features and saying the same few words over and over. It had appeared in his dreams as far back as the first day he set foot in Japan, constantly lurking in the corner of his eyes both in and out of sleep.

A normal mind couldn’t just produce a strange figure in their sleep, let alone doing so repeatedly and placing it in every single dream they had. Either Cuc had gotten insane or there really, truly was a ghost haunting him.

The bus made a stop for the red light, close enough to the sidewalk for him to see an array of stores. There was one that immediately caught his eye: a gift shop that specialized in mystical, somewhat ghostly trinkets for fans of the occult. And plastered on their window was a discount for a supposed spirit board.

Cuc reached for the stop button just as the light turned green.

_____________

It was around 8 in the evening when the doorbell rang.

Cuc would lie if he said he wasn’t a bit jumpscared by the sound. He didn’t even bring out the board, which had been left untouched ever since he brought it out of the store. But its mere presence was enough to make every little thing more sinister; he had no idea how many times he’d been scared by even the tiniest sounds made by his furniture.

He made his way to the door, more cautiously than intended. His hand visibly shook as it hovered over the handle. He took a deep, shaky breath then let it out, convincing himself that whoever (or whatever) it was on the other side would not try to hurt him. And with that, he peeked through the door.

“Hey, Cuc.”

“Kazu!” Cuc swung the door open and jumped in for a hug, half excited and half relieved. The suddenness was enough to move Kazu backwards but not enough to knock him over, allowing him to return the affection.

“Good to see you, too. Even though we last saw each other only hours ago,” he said lightheartedly, patting Cuc on the back. “You good?”

“Van! Cuc very excited!” said the blonde, who then dragged him by the hand. “Come on in!”

They zipped past the spacious living room and headed straight into Cuc’s bedroom. What was meant to be just another guest bedroom had bloomed with so much personality: plain white walls now plastered with posters, bookshelves packed with trinkets and figurines of his favorite shows, even the small Vietnamese flag tucked neatly in the pencil holder on his desk. It all just screamed Cuc.

“Neat place,” Kazu commented, much to Cuc’s delight. A whole afternoon of cleaning up the mess that was his own room had surely paid off.

The blonde dug through his belongings just as his best friend placed his down. One by one, Kazu unraveled his items as well as an explanation for each:

“I brought my own sleeping bag here. That way we don’t have to, um, share the same bed…” his voice trailed at the last part, even though Cuc didn’t seem to notice the implications. “I mean, like… it’s not like I’m uncomfortable sharing a bed with you! I don’t mind it, really. I was just afraid you’re uncomfortable…” he brushed the back of his head, averting his gaze as heat rushed all the way to his ears. Seeing how Cuc was still happily going through his items, it was the first time he wished the guy hadn’t been paying attention.

Regardless, Kazu swallowed his shame and continued on: “Anyway, I’ve also brought my notes in case you wanna study,” he then pulled out a pack of DVDs along with said notebook, “but if you wanna have fun, I’ve got a whole bunch of movies we can watch! Provided that, um, you actually have a DVD player… which you might not…” he then retreated back to his bag with much embarrassment, “I- It’s okay! We can totally do something else! If you like board games, I’ve also brought-”

“Here!”

Kazu looked up to see the item Cuc was holding, his face falling in an instant.

“What the-”

“Cuc wants to try this!” the blonde wiggled his newly bought spirit board in front of his friend’s face, much to the latter’s discomfort. “Let’s try ouija!”

“Why would you want to try that??” To say Kazu was baffled would be a massive understatement. “What brought this on??”

And now came the hard part: trying to explain that he wanted to see if there’d been a ghost haunting him. Cuc knew all of this was dumb, that being haunted sounded like a pathetic excuse to hide the multitude of psychological issues that might have been plaguing him for ages. A small part of him, though, did hope for a supernatural cause just so it didn’t seem like he needed that kind of help.

Articulating it all into words would still be insanely tough to do, both from his own reluctance and his horrible way with words. So instead he gave a prompt response, which was perhaps the stupidest one he’d ever have to mutter:

“Cuc curious.”

“…But why, though?” Kazu cocked his head to the side, fairly unconvinced. “Was it because of those guys playing kokkuri-san this morning? I told you, ghosts aren’t real.”

“How does Kazu know?”

“Like I said: no evidence suggesting that they are.”

“There is no evidence suggesting that they aren’t, either,” Cuc rebuffed, internally surprised by his own vocabulary. “Kazu never saw ghost doesn’t mean ghosts don’t exist. Maybe Kazu didn’t look at the right places.”

“Well, I…” the brunette wanted to form his own articulated argument, yet somehow no words came about. In a way, Cuc’s line of logic did make sense.

But Kazu was anything but a quitter, and he wanted to do anything else other than messing with a supposed spirit board, “Wh- Whatever! I don’t trust these ghost summoning games!”

“Is Kazu scared?”

“N- No!”

“Then will Kazu play with Cuc?”

“Go play by yourself!”

“Cuc can’t,” the blonde shook his head. “Instructions say not to do it alone.”

Kazu groaned. There were so, so many reasons why messing with a ouija board was a dumb idea. Sure, he didn’t believe in the supernatural and he never would, but that didn’t mean he was willing to throw himself into a summoning ritual even just to prove himself right. Real or not, it would still be unwise to dabble with forces beyond one’s knowledge or control.

He took one look at Cuc then, all of a sudden, his rationality flew out of the window. Cuc was dead serious, bearing on his face the look of utter determination that was only reserved for exams. Whatever it was that he wanted out of the ouija board must have been extremely important.

“Cuc,” Kazu grounded himself, staring back at Cuc’s equally intense gaze, “what exactly do you want out of this?”

Cuc remained unwavering, even if his response didn’t make sense at first glance, “An answer.”

“To what?”

“Cuc’s nightmares,” he forced the words out. “There is a monster in Cuc’s nightmares. The same monster every time. It wants to hurt Cuc. Cuc… Cuc needs to know why…”

Kazu’s gaze softened at the mere mention of Cuc’s nightmares; it was hard to blame him for being scared, really. But to the point of initiating a séance…?

“How are you so sure the monster you kept seeing is a ghost?”

“Cuc isn’t sure,” the blonde looked down, “and that’s why Cuc wants to find out.”

He then reached out for Kazu’s hands before the boy could even argue any further, his tone turned pleading, “Can Kazu do this for Cuc? Just this once? Cuc will stop if it doesn’t work.”

Kazu gulped, heat rising to his face by just how close their faces were at the moment. His mind fought like hell to say “no, this is an absolutely bad idea”, but his heart relented. He saw the desperation in those emerald eyes, compounded by the dark bags that had been shaped by non-stop terror. A small part of him wanted to believe Cuc, or at least follow along just for his sake.

“Cuc…”

“Please…?”

“…Fine,” Kazu sighed, upon which Cuc brightened up considerably. Much as he hated to admit defeat so easily, he was glad his cooperation brought his best friend joy. “But if I have nightmares tonight, I’m blaming you.”

“Van!” Cuc happily left to rummage through more items, clearly not minding the responsibility. Kazu watched as his best friend lit up an incense and waved it around the area, the smoky aroma somehow calming enough to ease his restlessness. The presence of six white candles on the floor meant that he wasn’t done with the lighter just yet. 

Once the incense had been secured on his desk and left to burn out, he handed Kazu a piece of black linen and asked: “Kazu hang this over window?”

“Sure thing,” the boy replied, tucking the fabric tightly to prevent any light leaking from the outside. The whole room was soon engulfed in total darkness, lasting for mere seconds before a tiny flame managed to flicker through.

Kazu sat down as Cuc went through each and every candle, making observations on just how much effort he was pouring into this ‘session’, “You’re really prepared for this, aren’t you?”

“Yep,” answered the blonde without looking up. “Cuc consulted experts.”

Kazu raised an eyebrow, tone turning playful, “And who were these experts, may I ask?” 

“The people from the occult shop,” a pause, “and the Internet.”

“Of course.”

With all six candles lit, Cuc arranged them into a circle. The lighter was placed within reach alongside a fireproof dish and a fire extinguisher (“Ghosts or not, what you’re about to do is still a fire hazard” was what the occult shop owner said). Motioning for Kazu to sit inside, he stared at the board before him. It was astonishing how much an intricately painted wooden board could bring about so much terror, even the thought of touching the planchette was enough to make his heart race. But he steeled his nerves, he had to. He’d brought this onto himself so he had to see the end of it.

“Cuc,” asked the best friend opposite him, “are you sure you’re ready?”

Cuc drew a long breath. Before he got a response, though, Kazu added: “You have to be ready. You have to be absolutely sure you want to do this. We can always back out now, but not when we’re already in the middle of it.”

Reining all of his frantic thoughts in, Cuc answered with much certainty, “Yes.”

“Alright,” Kazu nodded, “let’s do this.”

With both hands on the wooden planchette, the boys slid it around the surface of the board. Once it had gone three full circles, they slid it back to the center. Cuc flinched at a chill running down his spine, his fingers retracting yet remained still on the wooden piece. He could see Kazu looking up at him now instead of the board, as though his fear had been obvious enough for the guy to notice.

“You okay?” the brunette whispered, to which he nodded with a gulp. “Whenever you’re ready, Cuc.”

He took one deep breath and exhaled, steadying his voice as he asked: “Is anyone here with Cuc?”

No response.

Cuc darted his eyes around. One second. Two seconds. All seemed quiet.

“Is anyone here with Cuc?” he asked again, and silence answered back. Another second passed.

Cuc’s shoulders slumped, half relieved, half disappointed. The candles lit brightly against the dark, unwavering very much unlike his resolve.

“See,” Kazu spoke against the silence, “I told you ghosts aren’t-”

The planchette underneath their fingers suddenly moved, startling them both. It stopped on its track upon reaching “hello”, lingering for mere seconds before retreating back to its original position.

“D- Did you do that??” Kazu asked, to which Cuc quickly shook his head. Against the orange glow of the candles, the blonde could see color disappearing on his friend’s face.

“Must be a ghost…”

“It can’t be,” Kazu huffed, his voice shaky. “Something must’ve moved it! Could be the wind, or one of us leaning on it, or-”

A chill went down Cuc’s spine. He shivered, skin crawling from the sudden drop in temperature. He would’ve thought he’d imagined it if not for Kazu’s very visible breath in the air, a sight that was borderline impossible in a Japanese autumn.

“I- Is it me or is it getting c- cold in here…?” Kazu shivered. “Y- You didn’t turn on th- the AC, r- right?”

Cuc once again shook his head.

“O- Okay…” the boy gulped, exhaling another breath of white. There was no denying it now with the sudden temperature drop, the ouija board moving, the dead silence hanging in the air… Cuc knew there was only one answer to this. And now that there was another person with him experiencing the same things, no one could tell him it was all inside his head now.

“This can’t be real, c- can it?” Kazu chuckled nervously, seemingly still in denial. “There’s no way this works. There’s no way ghosts are-”

“Kazu,” Cuc interrupted, grounding the panicking boy somewhat, “don’t fear. Fear makes ghosts stronger. Instruction says so.”

“Okay, okay,” the brunette nodded furiously, voice going at least a pitch higher, “g- go on ahead then, C- Cuc.” He then set his sight back on the board, taking in deep and even breaths just so his heart wouldn’t explode out of his ribcage. Opposite him, Cuc prepared himself for another question, another simple one just for confirmation.

“Are you… in the room with Cuc right now?”

Immediately, the planchette moved across the board and stopped at the “yes” corner, then went back to its original placement once more.

Cuc felt his stomach churn. Kazu looked pale as death. One of the candles flickered, its light dancing and waving across the board. A chill touch brushed past the back of Cuc’s neck but there was nothing when he turned around. He brought up the third question before the panic got to settle in, however:

“H- How long have you been here…?”

The wooden planchette slid downward, and both their gazes followed.

“One,” Kazu read aloud, letting the piece guide him, “Y-E-A-R.”

“One year,” Cuc repeated.

“That’s… recent,” Kazu pondered. “Was there, um, a death in this house last year?”

“Cuc doesn’t know…” the blonde replied, “Cuc… just came here last year…”

And then a realization dawned on him.

“C- Can I ask a question?”

“Ah, sure,” Cuc nodded, gesturing to his friend to start. The brunette then took a deep breath and asked:

“Were you… an occupant of this house?”

The piece moved towards “no”. As though to answer another question that would immediately follow, it moved along the alphabet to say:

“F-O-L-L-O-W-E-D-C-U-C”

Cuc felt his stomach drop. Kazu rapidly looked between his best friend and the board under his fingers, eyes widening in terror.

“Cuc,” he asked breathlessly, “correct me if my English is wrong but… did it just say that it followed you here?”

“Ghost… followed Cuc…” 

The candles flickered. Orange light and dark shadows danced across their faces, the faces of two teenaged boys who should be staying up late watching a TV show instead of playing around with some forces they couldn’t grasp. If they were to be whisked away by some evil being and never to be seen again, they’d have no one but themselves to blame.

The blonde blinked himself out of his shock. Terrifying as it was, he was now one step closer to an answer. It wouldn’t hurt to find out more.

“Do you… appear in Cuc’s dreams?” his voice shook at the next part, memories of prior incidents pouring back at once into his mind. It neither helped nor alleviated the feeling when the planchette moved itself into a corner once more, the same corner that had said “yes”.

“N- No way…” Even Kazu found himself shocked at the revelation.

All these times… All the times where he’d woken up, cried to himself, driven to panic attacks… All the times where the demons in his head were dismissed as just another trauma response, where his fear of nightmares were shamed as childish and immature… All these times where he’d thought there was something wrong with his head, and that it’d always been his fault that he ended up in this predicament...

Only to find out that his fears had not been irrational, that his mind had been invaded by an external force beyond his control. His nightmares were vivid not because his trauma shaped it like so, but because a literal paranormal creature had been entering and tormenting him inside of them.

Cuc felt his throat threatening to close. He was terrified for sure, but a small part of him felt relieved; vindicated, even.

“Hey,” Kazu’s voice snapped him out of it, “a- are you okay?”

“Fine,” Cuc nodded. The stinging in his eyes proved otherwise, however.

“D- Do you want to stop now?” asked the brunette with a shiver. “I- I think that’s enough…”

But part of Cuc didn’t feel satisfied. Not yet. He’d confirmed the presence of an outside influence, now he just needed to know why.

“Cuc… ask one more question.”

“Are you sure?” Kazu asked again, to which Cuc reaffirmed with a solid nod. His gaze was unwavering, perhaps even more so than the dancing candle flames, and to that Kazu had no choice but to keep the session going.

“What do you want from Cuc?”

It got quiet. Too quiet. He couldn’t hear anything but his own heartbeat and breathing, as though whatever they were talking to had vanished on the spot. Or perhaps it hadn’t been real all along, but that would only be something for the Kazu of ten minutes ago to use in his argument. Right now he was simply too scared out of his mind to play skeptic.

“A- Are you sure you can ask that kind of question?? What if it gets mad-”

The planchette moved suddenly, at a much stronger and faster pace than before. It was when Cuc realized he might have angered the entity he was conversing with.

“W-A-N-T,” the blonde read aloud, “C-U-C-B-A-C-K”

“Wantcucback,” Kazu muttered, spelling each and every letter again in his mind, “want Cuc back?”

“Eh?”

The planchette suddenly moved again, without either of them asking.

“C-U-C-L-E-F-T-M-E”

Cuc felt his heart stop. The voice in his nightmares echoed once more, “You left me.”

“Left?? What do you mean he left you??” Kazu asked frantically, to which the board gladly gave a response.

“I-D-I-E-D-C-U-C-D-I-D-N-T”

“Wh- What??” Kazu looked back and forth across the board. “I didn’t catch that! Cuc, what did it say?? What is it saying???”

Fear, strangely enough, had held him in place. Cuc didn’t do so much as flinch even when Kazu was freaking out, when he set himself up for a final, potentially lethal question:

“Who are you?”

Kazu’s frantic movements stopped on their tracks, his face pale as a sheet. Underneath their fingers, the planchette moved across the alphabet letter by letter, slow enough as though forcing them to follow along for real this time around. 

“N-G-U” Kazu read the letters out, “Y-E-N”

Cuc’s heart dropped to the pit of his stomach.

“N-gu-yen?” Kazu repeated, utterly confused. “What’s N-gu-yen?”

“Nguyen.”

He took a deep breath then let it out. Deep breath, then let out. Numbers and letters on the board meshed into swirls of black. His throat closed, his vision blurry, his eyes burning. There was nothing he could hear other than the rapid beating of his heart. It pounded against his ribcage like a wild animal, threatening to burst his chest open at any moment. He felt nothing, not even the strange cold of his own room. His present vanished and morphed itself into a scene of his past, a memory that he’d tried so very hard to move on from.

Orange lights danced before his eyes and transformed into blossoms of fire. Fire that burned and glowed brightly against the dark highway. Fire that bloomed and fluttered on top of a wrecked car, specks of ash flying about as it spread. It was exactly the scene that would be forever ingrained into his mind, a reminder of the past he could never escape from.

Cuc stood up and ran. To where, he didn’t know. He ran until there was nothing but darkness surrounding him, when the orange lights died down and were no longer present to mock him. He ran until he tripped on his own steps and fell onto the ground, and by which point all he could do was curl onto himself and sewed his eyes shut.

He wanted this nightmare to be over. He wanted the darkness to go away. He heaved as his heart continued to rattle against its cage, as his nails dug into the fabric of his trousers and pressed onto the flesh of his thighs. 

Deep breath and let out. Deep breath and let out. Deep breath and let-

“You left me.”

Cuc pressed his hands against his ears, fingers digging into his hair.

Deep breath, deep breath, deep breath…

“Cuc left me.”

Stop…

“Want Cuc back.”

Make it stop make it stop make it stop make it-

“Cuc!”

He heard a familiar voice. Not from his past, not from his imagination, but from the present. A weight was pressed against his whole body, comforting rather than suffocating. He let himself breathe, one exhale at a time, and slowly his world brightened up and reformed itself.

“Cuc,” the voice, soothing and warm, continued, “can you hear me?”

He nodded weakly, sniffling from his blocked nose. 

“Good, that’s good. Keep it going.” 

His surroundings obliged by materializing in front of his eyes.

“What are five things you can see?”

“Five…” Cuc mumbled. The shapeless blobs in front of his eyes finally rebuilt themselves into their original forms, whose presence confirmed to him once more that he was safe in his house and no longer on the streets.

The streets where it happened.

“Five things you can see.”

“Ah,” Cuc snapped back to his task, mentally thanking the voice for halting his spiral, “Cuc sees the couch, the coffee table, the lamp, and…”

His eyes darted to the left, where he thought the weight had come from, “Brown strings… no, wait, brown hair. And…” He leaned back, finally facing the source of his comfort, “Kazu.”

“Hey,” Kazu’s voice was soft, hands moving away from Cuc’s shoulders to cup his teary cheeks, “can you hear me?”

Cuc nodded, lips quivering into a frown. His heartbeat had slowed down, at least to the point he could no longer hear it banging in his ear. He looked upon Kazu, upon the soft golden eyes that had seemingly driven the darkness away. How could someone be so effortlessly comforting, to the point of calming him down with their mere presence alone? Cuc wanted nothing more than to do something for Kazu in return.

“Good. Good. You heard me,” Kazu nodded along. “What else can you hear?”

From what Cuc remembered, there were four things he should be listing. That meant three were left. “Cuc hears the fan… Cuc’s heart… and-”

He heard a growling noise in the distance. He would’ve dismissed it as something his mind made up if not for Kazu turning to his side also, as though he too was startled by the strange noise.

“Did you hear something?” the boy looked around. “Must be the wind…”

Cuc blinked himself further back to consciousness, his brain now beginning to assess the situation. He was in the living room instead of the playing space in his bedroom. The lights were on and it was dark out. His bedroom door was wide open, revealing nothing but the empty darkness.

Wait…

“Why is bedroom dark?”

“We blocked out the lights there. You know, for the ghost summoning-”

“No,” Cuc interrupted, green eyes staring straight into his friend’s gold, “Cuc lit candles.”

“Eh…?”

Power suddenly went out, engulfing the whole place in darkness. Cuc clutched onto Kazu immediately, better to hold onto whatever was there of his friend when he could no longer see anything in front of him. He could feel the way Kazu’s hand moved back onto his shoulders, gripping even more tightly as panicked heaves escaped him.

“Wh- What’s going on??”

“Kazu…” Cuc called out to him, hoping that somewhere in the dark he did turn back, “did Kazu say goodbye?”

“Goodbye to what??”

“The board.”

There was a pregnant pause. Cuc could feel Kazu’s heart dropping to his stomach at the same time his did.

“N- No…” Kazu answered quietly, much to Cuc’s horror, “Y- You freaked out and ran off so I just ran after you. I didn’t know I was supposed to-”

In just a second, Kazu slipped away. No, more like ripped away violently from Cuc’s hands. Cuc felt the boy’s firm hold on his shoulders loosening and disappearing all in an instant, way too fast and too sudden to have been a deliberate move. And in the darkness he heard Kazu scream, then a loud bang against a far end wall, then nothing at all.

From the shadows came two glowing spheres. Spheres of bright blue-gray, beautiful and ethereal if not for the horrifying implication of their source. Cuc had seen it before: they haunted his dreams, they peeked in his vision, they were everywhere. What was once thought to be an elusive figment of his imagination was now right in front of his eyes, just as jarring as he’d always remembered.

He felt a pull on his ankle and all of a sudden he too was dragged away. There was nothing grabbing on his ankle, no claws, no fingers, nothing. It was as though an invisible force was pulling him towards a shadow abyss with all its might, ignoring his desperate screams and pleas to be let go. A doorframe was on sight for him to grab on just in time, nails digging into the wood as the force on his leg increased tenfold.

As he pulled himself against the doorframe and towards the living room, his panicking eyes could still make out a figure in the distance. It was Kazu, his frame small and frail as he tried propping himself up with much struggle. With one last breath left in his system, he shouted with all his might:

“KAZU!!”

The boy immediately looked up, fearful gold eyes meeting desperate green ones. Those were the last thing Cuc saw before his grip on the doorframe gave up.

Cuc couldn’t scream when he got dragged away into the dark, when his bedroom door closed on itself and trapped him with whatever that had led him here. He curled onto himself and crawled his way into a corner, the force strangely no longer trying to pull him back. His face met the wall and he propped himself upward, frantically sitting himself up straight as he came face to face with the one that started it all.

As his body froze and his eyes adjusted to the darkness, Cuc could make out a shadow outline enclosing the spheres. It took on a humanoid shape, spheres exactly where eyes would be, and made its way forward. Its steps were staggered and imbalanced like a puppet clumsily controlled by a novice. It growled with a mouth that was blended into the pitch black of its face, and from those growls soon came coherent words.

“You,” it said, voice layered and demonic, “You traitor. You left me behind.”

Cuc began to hyperventilate; the fact that it was speaking in his native language completely went over his head, “Wh- wh- what are y- you talking ab- bout??”

“We promised to stay together. You promised… you would never leave me… but you did,” the creature sneered, eyes flashing with dangerous intent. “You left me in that burning vehicle. You left me to DIE while you get to live out your fullest life. Unfair!! UNFAIR!!!”

Without an ounce of hesitation, it lunged towards Cuc and grabbed him by the throat, pinning him to the ground with as much pressure as possible. It growled, revealing a mouth full of razor sharp teeth lined with dark viscous liquid. Its craggly claws scratched against Cuc’s skin as he struggled to break free, as his throat began to close on itself and black dots danced in his vision. 

It all happened in a flash. He heard some banging sounds, some high pitched shrieks, all muffled into a cacophony that could barely be registered by his ears. The one thing he sure felt, though, was the disappearance of any force on his neck, and all of a sudden his throat was opened wide and free.

Cuc coughed profusely, drawing in deep breaths to fill all the missing oxygen in his lungs. His surroundings slowly took shape as his numbing limbs began to work on their own once again. It took a whole lot of effort just to lift up his own neck alone, but thankfully his vision had adjusted enough to see clearly what was in front of him.

“LEAVE HIM ALONE!!” 

Kazu stood tall between him and the shadow creature. His voice was shaking, his whole body was shaking. In his hands was the spirit board, now there to try and counter the very same thing it’d summoned. He let out an unsteady exhale, board gripped tightly with his palms as he proclaimed once more: “L- Leave him a- alone!”

“Stay out of this,” the creature responded. “Unhand the traitor and I shall leave you be.”

“I- I won’t let that happen!” Kazu shouted, “C- Cuc did nothing wrong!”

There was fear in his voice, an ever so slightly shaky undertone that was desperately signalling for him to run. Theoretically, he could’ve just run: he’d been opposing this plan from the beginning, he’d warned Cuc about the dangers, so naturally everything that had transpired was all Cuc’s doing. Cuc had brought it onto himself, so he had to face the consequences.

But Kazu knew better than to play the blame game. Guilty or not, it was still his best friend who was in danger. Cuc, his inseparable companion, the first and only person he’d opened his heart to and trusted his life with. Kazu swore he would do anything to protect Cuc, even if it meant using himself as a shield between the guy and his supposedly personal demon. 

“Stay. Out. Of. This.”

Kazu did not back down.

“I said STAY OUT!!”

The creature lunged forward, claws wide open. Kazu could feel the bravery draining from his own person, his grip on the board faltering ever so slightly. But before his body could give up, his fight-or-flight instinct kicked in and finally thought to use the board as a shield. He held it up just in time for the shadow claws reached him, puncturing the wooden plank and thankfully not his face. It tried to pull back only to realize its talons had been stuck on the board, growling and spitting as it tried to set its hand free. And being the one with a grip on the board right now, Kazu thought he could work around this.

What came next was a tug and pull between man and ghost. Strong as it was, Kazu noticed how little it had actually tried to harm him: in theory, it could’ve just used its free hand to slash the board into pieces and kill him in one go. Instead, it just struggled and struggled like a feral animal trapped in a cage, limbs restrained from getting anyone into harm’s way.

Wait…

Kazu pulled the board back and redirected it onto the ground, driving one of the corners into contact with the wooden flooring. He didn’t know how hard he’d hit, for at least half of the force he could muster was solely to counter the creature’s pull. But the moment the board hit the floor and made an awful ‘crack’ sound that seemingly echoed through the whole room, the creature shrieked again, this time pained and not at all murderous.

A fire extinguisher came in between him and the ghost, so heavy that it smashed cleanly through whatever bones the creature had and severed its hand entirely. Kazu stumbled backwards and fell on his back, barely getting any time to register when he felt a grip on his shoulders.

“Kazu!!!” screamed Cuc, shaking him slightly. “Kazu hear Cuc??”

“Cuc…” he panted. One second, two seconds, and suddenly he remembered it again, “Th- The board!! We have to destroy the board!!”

“Wh-” 

A shrilling scream interrupted them both. They physically recoiled from the inhuman pitch, helplessly covering from the soundwaves piercing in their eardrums. The creature held onto its severed wrist in agony, from which more shadowy matter began to grow. 

“It’s regenerating!” cried Kazu, curling into himself. With the board still in front of him, he kicked it with what remained of his strength and shouted: “Cuc, NOW!!”

As if on cue, Cuc grabbed the incoming plank of wood and rolled over, stopping just as he reached the fireproof dish he’d set aside earlier. He scrambled to find a lighter, propping himself up just as the creature’s gaze pierced straight into his eyes. Those glowing orbs of light blue-gray, the pearly tones that he thought he’d already moved on from. There was no denying it, those eyes belonged to him.

The creature bent down on all fours and, as though coming straight out of a horror movie, crawled towards Cuc with its limbs twisted. That suddenness alone was enough to snap him out of his frozen state, his hand now feeling the cold plastic on the floor that was the lighter. He held it up with his thumb pressed on the trigger, just in time for the shadow to reach him.

One second, a spark of flame bloomed from the lighter.

Two seconds, the monster outstretched its black, veiny hand towards his face.

Three seconds, Cuc threw the lighter into the dish and right on the spirit board.

The second the lighter hit the dish, so strongly that the plastic container cracked and the fuel leaked out, both the board and the monster bursted into flames. Cuc frantically crawled away from the heat, a numbing pain washed all over his face despite the lack of direct contact. He crawled on his back until something else got in the way, followed by a sense of enclosure from behind. He whipped his head around, heart stopping at the contact, only to see that it was just Kazu wrapping his arms around his frail body. And with another heart attack narrowly averted, Cuc returned the gesture.

They held each other and watched the creature flail about. Screams of agony tore through the room as it crumbled on all fours, disintegrating from limb to limb upon its shrilling final words.

“I WILL COME BACK FOR YOU!!!”

And with that, it quickly disappeared into a pile of ash.

The flame continued on, painting the ouija board black everywhere it touched. Cuc’s breathing slowly settled, deep and slow rather than quick and shallow. His heart rate stabilized, his body uninjured, and - most importantly - his best friend safe. All in all, everything that could’ve gone wrong hadn’t gone entirely wrong.

Still, that wasn’t enough to keep his soul at peace. He’d seen it with his own eyes and heard it from his own ears. The crushing pressure of its cracked hands lingered on his neck. Its name, its curses, its desire to take him… It had all been real. And worst of all, Kazu had been there to witness everything, too.

It was never his trauma, nor was it ever his troubled mind messing with him. There was, and had always been, an old friend haunting him every step of the way.

And he wanted him dead.