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It’s not that he would normally complain about watching a movie with his beloved, even if for some reason Patton was refusing to watch a Disney movie. He insisted it had to be NetFlix. Looking back, that should have been a warning sign, but Roman had never felt the need to look for warning signs when having a date with Patton before and he certainly wasn’t going to start now.
It was a little harder to ignore the fact that it was freezing in Patton’s room when Roman arrived. “Is your AC broken? Stuck in high gear?” Roman wrapped his arms around himself as best he could without dropping the bowl of popcorn he’d brought with him.
“Nope!” Patton patted the seat beside him. When Roman took it, Patton wrapped a fuzzy blanket over the two of them. Roman had to smile – at least there would be some Disney in here, as the blanket portrayed Elsa’s ice castle. Plus, cuddling to watch NetFlix was always a good thing!
Maybe that’s why Patton had it so cold in here? July in Florida did tend to put a damper on cuddle opportunities, no matter how used to the heat and humidity you got. Roman took the remote Patton handed him and scrolled through the channels, eventually settling on My Little Pony. It wouldn’t normally be his first choice, but he’d heard there was some excellent heroism, and Patton would probably adore the cute ponies and the moral tone of the show encouraging friendship.
Three episodes in, Roman was enjoying it, but he finally had to ask. “This is great and all, but… why were you so insistent about finding something on NetFlix? Was it just about watching something new instead of rewatching Disney?”
Patton shook his head. “Janus and I were talking about our plans for the day, and I told him you were coming over for movie night. He said something about it being high time the two of us engaged in some NetFlix and chill.”
“You…” Roman stared at Patton, mouth hanging open. Possibility one: Patton needed to borrow some of Logan’s flashcards on slang terms. Possibility two: “You turned our date night into a dad joke? Because of something the evil snakeboy said??”
“Wait, what?” Patton’s eyes lit up, but quickly faded back into confusion. “What’s the dad joke here? I really don’t know what you’re talking about, Roman.”
Possibility one it was, then. “Make sure to get this information to Logan in case he doesn’t already have the flash card. NetFlix and chill is a code word for a booty call.” He paused, making sure Patton understood. From the way he was suddenly bright red, Roman thought he did. Just in case, he added, “When you pass that on to Logan, make sure to explain that a booty call is inviting someone over for sex, because you know him and slang.”
“Why would Janus think… I can get why Remus would say we should have a NetFlix and chill date night, but why Janus?” Patton sputtered. “Why would he think inserting himself into our business like that would be acceptable?”
Roman pulled Patton in tighter, pressing a kiss to his forehead. “My beloved Patton, have you not noticed that Janus very much enjoys needling you and getting under your skin? He probably assumed you knew what he was saying and said it to mess with you, or that if you didn’t know what it meant it would be a hilarious prank. No deep motivation.”
“So… you’re not mad? About any of it?” Patton looked up. “Even about the unintentional dad joke?”
“Oh, I’m mad about a couple things here,” Roman said with a big smile and another soft forehead kiss. “First, I’m mad that the dad joke was unintentional and you don’t get to do it on purpose. I know how much you love those.” Patton’s soft laugh made Roman relax. “And second, I’m mad about the freezing. I get why you did it and I completely forgive you, but you know I don’t like being cold.” Patton started to apologize, but Roman cut him off. “The cuddling was worth it, though! Maybe next time, make it a little less cold?”
“Okay.” Patton bit his lip, ducking his head. “So… are you… now that you know what this was supposed to be, are you…”
“Babe.” Roman pulled him in tighter. “Janus doesn’t know anything about our relationship and our choices and our timeline. If you’d told me you were inviting me to NetFlix and chill, I would have assumed this as a dad joke. No expectations for anything but watching some cartoons and spending time with the man I love.”
Patton relaxed, snuggling in even tighter as he started the next episode. “I love you.”