Chapter Text
You had been training at HellGuard for a while, only hoping for a somewhat decent future.
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Life was pretty much sunshine's and rainbows. You were relatively strong with a bright future, you had plenty of friends, good morals, in my opinion, HILARIOUS and pretty badass. You were genuinely a good person. OH OH!! AND on top of that, last year, your crush for like a couple months asked you out!! And now both of you are dating! HOW WONDERFUL!! But, there was one complicated problem. Zanka Nijiku.
Zanka was a complicated person in general. He had the 'mysterious classmate' starter pack. He was mostly pretty playful, friendly, he was competitive, mostly just wanting to be 'the best'. He was mostly known as like the best student in your grade. And, of course, had the crush starter pack. A lot, and I mean a good HANDFUL of people liked him. Some for about 5 minutes, some for 3 years, and some for 8 months. Boys and girls, of course. You remembered a time when your friend, let's call her Nicole, had a crush on Zanka. Nicole was lowkey a BAD BITCH too. LIKE BADDDDD. Badass too. Now, Nicole was pretty bold, yk like a just a really funny, bold, good person, but when it came to Zanka, she was shy as hell. You and your friend group would always try to convince her to talk to Zanka.
And sometimes it would work!! Mostly, it didn't. Specifically, this one time (technically the last time you did this), it was like the DEAD of night, and it was February 13th, so you and your friends, except for Nicole of course, were planning something for Nicole and Zanka. Since most of you guys were single, some in a relationship, some in a situationship, some just straight up single, and some with crushes, you all were seriously planning all of this out. Cuz a LOT of people shipped Nicole and Zanka, including you. So that night, none of you guys slept. And the next day, you somehow convinced Nicole to confess her feelings to Zanka. You and the rest of your friend group stayed away, being AMAZING friends. And then like 5 minutes later, Nicole walked over to the group, looking pretty bummed.
She looked up, "so..he DOESN'T like me back.." she said, kinda playful. Then for the rest of the day you and your friend group watched chick flicks, and then at EXACTLY 3 am you guys snuck out of the place with NO flashlights. And then had the audacity to use a ouija board out in the pure dark, with ONLY your friend group, until the sun started rising. AND SOMEHOW NO ONE FOUND OUT. It was quite literally the best valentines of your life. And then like MONTHS later, you and your friend group were playing truth or dare, and then Nicole admitted that she only liked Zanka for like a week and then after pretended to like him. So that was quite the revelation.
Anyway, back to Zanka being a problem. About last year, you noticed that he would stare at YOU, yes you, too long. His gaze would linger, and sometimes, you would catch him staring. Well, yeah, it sounds cringy as hell, but you DID. This dude would be super friendly, and then as soon as you came around, he would become the worst person on this fucking planet. He wouldn't speak a SINGLE word; he would only glance at you and stare holes into you. And that was mostly it. But that was all he needed to catch your attention. And the worst part about this situation, was that people ACTUALLY wanted you two to be together. So like, yeah, shipped y'all. (talking abt ppl shipping each other is sending me back to 2023 bro)
He made you go INSANE. Because one minute, he (probably) DESPISED you, and you despised him, and then your own classmates, and like TWO teachers would be talking about you guys flirting. "But it's only two teachers!!" IT WAS TWO TEACHERS TOO MANY. Cuz imagine that you hate someone's guts and then your classmates start making jokes about y'all being together, and on top of that, you already have a crush that ISN'T the person you hate. Which yeah, that would be upsetting, but I mean, it's your classmates so yeah. BUT THEN YOUR TEACHER STARTS SHIPPING Y'ALL. JUST IMAGINE. It would suck, RIGHT??
SIGHHHH, anyway, that year, your crush, Rae, asked you out. To which you immediately said yes. Rae was an amazing guy. He had your humor, he was your type, he had good morals, good fashion sense, smart, kind-- and okay I'm gonna stop there before I start cringing at the words I type out. But yeah, you get the point. And that leads to the present.
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Today, Zanka was nowhere to be found. He was quite literally gone. It started with just the whispers and rumors, but by the next day, the rumors were proven to be true. Then the whispers tuned into conversations and guesses at to where he went, if the trainers or higher ups would try to locate him, etc. And honestly, you didn't give two fucks, or at least, you really wanted to not give two fucks. You mostly didn't care, but there was a small part of you that was worried. You and your friends had like one conversation about him.
"Hey ____, where do you think he went?"
"I dunno, I don't really care."
"Really?"
"Really."
"I wonder if the higher ups will try to find him, I mean, he WAS a really good asset"
"They probably will"
"Yeah, probably. Nicole, are you worried about your ex--"
"Girl he is NOT my ex, SHUT UP."
"Damn chill"
So that'd how your conversation with your friend group about Zanka went.
And then, day 3 arrived. Still no Zanka. Then trainers began moving his belongings out of his room. Those days then soon turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months. And soon, you forgot about Zanka, well, not forgot about him, but he became the very, very least of your worries.
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Today was really sunny, everyone was on break. You were chatting happily with your friends, and then you spotted Rae walking toward the group. "Ooo, wonder what he wants" one of your friends said, Rae was now in front of you. Goddamn he could walk fast. "Hey..can we talk?" Rae asked, "sure" you said as you nodded, he then clasped your hand, leading you away from your friends. Rae led you to a shaded area, he took a deep breath once he let go of your hand. "Let me just get straight to the point..I...I want a break. From us." Rae stated, he looked you dead in the eye with the expression of a guilty puppy. You froze. "I love you so much" you liar "but I just need a break, my parents are pressuring me into so much, and.." he looked up, "I think I like someone else." You knew he specifically didn't say love for a reason.
You internally let out a choked sob; you had too much of a 'nonchalant' reputation to cry right now. You swallowed the tears you so badly wanted to spill, "okay. I understand." you calmly said. Rae looked at you lovingly, "thank you for understanding. I'm sorry-" he said, you quickly replied as soon as he ended his sentence, "nah, it's fine. Go enjoy the sun" you nonchalantly said, then waved and walked back to your friend group. You didn't dare look back.
(I'm just gonna start naming the friends bc this is gonna be hard to write if I don't)
You went over to your friend group calmly, "so? Oh no, I know that look" Erica said, "I'll beat his ass if you need--"
"no. I'm fine."
"No you're not."
You stopped trying to convince them you were okay.
"Aw..it's okay, he was a little bitch anyway" Hazel said as they embraced you, which their comment made you laugh a bit. "People are like buses. They come and they go, you'll be fine. Call out sick if you need, ya big old crybaby" Charlotte stated jokingly, you shook your head as Hazel let go of you, "I'll be fine."
(SORRY ABT THE NAMES IK THEY SOUND BASIC I'M SORRY)
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It had been three days after your breakup. Yesterday you had started feeling really sick, and your trainer let you have a day off. And today you were having another one, which this sick day had been requested. All you had done yesterday and today was lie around with a throbbing headache. You had been walking on eggshells ever since your breakup, mostly because you didn't wanna look like a crazy sad lonely jealous ex. But of course, your stupid headache was too much, so you're now taking time off. You laid in your bed numbly, wondering about Zanka for the first time in..months. It honestly surprised you how much time passed since then. You wondered where he was now. You thought about your friends, your family, all those moments that you saved in your mind. Every now and then gigging at a certain memory.
Next day..
Today you decided to go back to training, solely because you wanted to look fine. Rumors at HellGuard spread fast, like Bayonetta, so if someone with a big ass mouth knew that Rae broke up with you and then you took days off, they would probably assume that you were sad and jealous. And you did NOT want anyone to assume that, so today you decided to go back to training. Your head still kinda hurt, but whatever, you would just have to suck it the hell up. WHICH THAT WAS A BIG MISTAKE.
As soon as you walked into the room, your trainer assigned you a task. A mission, really. You had to now deliver a letter to some higher up's place or something like that. Which was like, okay, I just fucking got back but fine, and then you set off.
An hour or two later...
YOU WERE SO INCREDIBLY LOST. You must've taken like 10 wrong turns cuz..THIS didn't look like any area you were familiar to. The air was stale, your lungs ached for any kind of clean air, but you had to settle for the repulsive air. There was trash nearly everywhere. You were 99.9999999.00 % sure this was No Man's Land. You had never been here but had heard of it. Your feet sharply ached, you had been walking for- what? An hour? Two hours? Though, you still hauled yourself forward. Then- a guttural sound. A beast made of trash, thriving in the putrid energy awakened. The beast towered over you menacingly. HOLY UNQUALIFIED. You had only ever fought people, and this thing, WAS NOT A PERSON.
You were so tired. You had no chance of defeating it. Especially with your small weapon. Was this the end? Would you never say one last 'I love you' to your family or friends? Would you perish alone, unknowingly, and remain missing for the rest of time? Would you never admit your secret interest in Zanka..? Your mind and heart raced, your stomach churned uncomfortably. What if these moments were truly your last? You only wished for a couple things in these short suffocating minutes. You wished that Bring Me to Life by Evanescence would play at your funeral, you wished that you would be buried with 20 bucks, and that your demise would be almost painless. A painful death probably wouldn't feel good.
You squeezed your eyes shut, awaiting your final breath.
In, out.
In, out.
In, out.
After a couple minutes or so, you still didn't meet your final breath. You peeled your eyes open, nervous for what awaited your gaze. It wasn't the trash beast that you saw when you opened your eyes, it was a silhouette of a man. The broad man had piss-backrooms colored blond spikey hair, though his back was faced to you, you could see an umbrella in his hand. On the backside of his coat, you saw a logo. A Cleaners logo. You assumed the umbrella was his vital instrument. The man drifted down to the ground in front of you. He looked at you over his shoulder with a grin.
That was when you blacked out.