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It’s just an electrical box. That’s all it is. Nothing more, nothing less. A simple electrical box that powers Queen and Spadina. Normally, no one would pay it any mind. Occasionally, electricians repaired it.
But today, someone else came to visit the electrical box. A bearded man, with hair parted to one side, wearing a brown blazer and a pink shirt. He’s holding a solitary flower.
Jay stares at the electrical box. It had been a year. A year since he had killed a man. A year since he lost his best friend at this exact spot. A year since everything had changed, yet stayed the same.
He really didn’t need to do this. But something was pulling him here. As if everything depended on him coming to this place and placing this stupid fucking flower on the ground.
Maybe he should just leave, and never come here again. But that’s impossible. Whether it was one of Matt’s plans, or just walking somewhere else, he’d always be near it. He could never look away either, it would just be behind him.
He’d have to leave Toronto to be fully rid of it. He didn’t even have to leave everyone behind. They could all just move to a new city. Matt probably wouldn’t like it, but he’d manage. He quickly excises that thought from his mind.
Jay knows he’s being selfish. The only reason he’s here and not in some alternate timeline is because of Matt and this electrical box. He should be grateful. He’s grateful for this entire city in fact.
He places the flower on top of the electrical box. It probably won’t last for long up there. A bird will steal it, or maybe it’ll be picked up by the wind and fly somewhere else. Maybe someone else will pick it up and give it to someone they love.
Jay looks up at the CN tower. It pierces the clear blue sky. It’s beautiful. He should give it a flower. It was important in the plan, after all. He shakes that thought off as stupid. Besides, it’s getting late. Matt’s probably planning to get him back somehow.
As he walks to the bus station, he feels a strange appreciation for the city. It’s been with him and Matt for all these years. It’s changed a bit, but it’s still their home. It’s not perfect, but nothing is. He’s glad to live here with Matt.
He looks at all the buildings he sees while on the bus. He thinks about every single one. He’s not sure if he likes what’s come over him, but he ignores that feeling and keeps looking at the city.
—
He likes their current house. It’s nice. He still misses their second one. Something about it was special. The apartment was special too, but the second one was the perfect house.
Jay heads inside. Matt’s talking with the camera men about something. He doesn’t want to interrupt them, but it’s not long before Matt notices him.
“Bird! Where were you?! I thought you were only going out for a little while!”
“I got lost.”
Matt seems to believe that lie. Not like the truth would make any sense. He should probably tell Matt what happened someday. Maybe today’s the day. He thinks about it for a bit, and decides not to.
He decides to reminisce on the Seventh Inning Skydive plan. Him and Matt talk for hours about it. It’s nice. They hug and go to bed. They go about their day when they wake up.
The flower hasn’t moved from the electrical box.