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Mark sat down in his class, surrounded by loud classmates. They all had unique talents, and they put them to use in a way that Mark couldn't understand. He had managed to enroll in Eden's Garden Academy, where multiple classes ran in the school all consisted of top tier elite students. Apparently, Mark was one of them too.
All he did was make some tracks, gain some money and waste it on blunts. He had been well recognized in the music industry with multiple honorable awards, but he had never bothered to attend the ceremonies. However, he had considered the opportunity of frequenting a prestigious academy, strongly encouraged by his mother.
He was here now. And he felt like he regretted it.
It all came to adapting to the environment, most of the students had traveled pretty far to get to the academy, including Mark, so he was now one of the many that lived there. The dorms are okay. They are spacious and seemed to have been fully customized for each student. Mark received a whole music set, yet he hadn't touched it since he arrived.
✧ ────── ✧
After Mark's mom had said her goodbyes to him, he entered the train, he was aware that the trip would be tedious, after all it was almost five whole hours of nothing. He looked back once again, seeing her youthful expression stained with emotion. She had tears in her eyes, and Mark had no idea if she was happy that he was leaving or vice versa. Maybe she would be better off without him, he thought. But he would definitely miss her and his cat.
The train's inside looked luxurious. Mark felt dirty and cheap entering it, he had even taken a shower early in the same morning. He only had a backpack with him, Mark didn't need much, he took the necessary clothes and chargers for his headphones and phone. He made sure to grab a picture of his dear cat Veronica, who he'd call Veronicat for fun. After all, she was one of the only things that made him happy. Leaving her behind made him feel quite upset. Like he was going far from home into the unknown. Now he would have to leave his room, interact with other students and make music.
Mark gripped the straps of his backpack as he heard the door slam behind him. He anxiously looked over some people that were already in the train. There were only a few, so he didn't have a hard time picking a seat, he opted for the one at the far back of wagon. There were rows of two seats on each side, with chairs that looked more like armchairs. Expensive looking. He sat down on the seat next to the window, placing his bag down between his feet. He braced himself for the trip and watched as the train departed from his train station.
Mark had never seen a train like this before. He had used public transportation in his city, so he knew this could only be part of a private company. Perhaps, the high tier academy he was going to now. Whatever it was. He slumped back against the seat and sighed, putting his headphones on. He knew he had done a good job for bringing his favorite noise-canceling headphones. He listened to some music. Not caring what it was, but he had always tried to avoid the genre he was set in with his career. He looked out through the window a couple minutes and immediately got bored. How the hell would he handle five hours of this?
Mark was not a traveler, at all. He hated long trips and having to leave his house, he didn't find beauty on anything he saw whenever he traveled with his mom. He didn't have ambitions to leave the country either, he just wanted to remain in his safe place. The worst of all was that he couldn't sleep through his trips, unless he took something to relax, which managed to save him many times already. He had everything with him, he had remembered to take his meds and whenever he ran out, he could go to the pharmacy in the academy. He was really thrown off with the idea of a pharmacy inside the school. Rich people's matters, he thought, sighing.
Mark had taken a sedative before boarding. Knowing he would have a hard time otherwise. So, without further ado, he placed the hood on his head and leaned to his side, trying to find a comfortable position to fall asleep. For once, he managed to fall asleep. Thanks to his meds though, he was out quickly.
In that same instance, he had a dream, which lasted about 2 hours of the trip, before he woke up again, seemingly anxious as the dream jumped onto a rather harsh conclusion.
"Woah, dude! My bad, did I wake you up?"
Mark laid his eyes on a stranger. Who was opening a bag of chips, quickly a scent of artificially flavored potato chips wavered in the air. He figured that as the train filled up with students; someone would end up sitting next to him. He noticed that the stranger was saying something, but he didn't hear him as he was wearing his headphones. Mark pulled his hood off and revealed the alligator beanie he was wearing underneath, as well as a pair of white wireless headphones with yellow accents on them. He looked drowsy, blinking his eyes open so he could get used to light again. The other student seemed to get why he was ignoring him. He didn't see that he was wearing headphones.
At last, Mark took a break from listening to music, he had no idea what he was listening to at this point, his playlist had been shuffled into oblivion. He slid his headphones down his neck, letting them rest on each side of his shoulders. He was embarrassed. After all, the man sitting next to him was handsome. Mark was aware that he didn't know how to act next to guys that were his type.
Before boarding, he had been caught daydreaming by his mom. Mark wondered about the possibility of there being handsome guys. But all he could think were slicked back nerds. The types of people to have ultimates and enrolling in a top tier school. He wasn't a fan of that.
"Hey, going to Eden's Garden too, right? What's your ultimate? You seem like a cool dude!" The guy with white locs filled Mark's brain with questions, he clearly had no idea what to say. He would probably end up saying something dumb.
Mark couldn't look away from him. After all... He was someone completely out of his expectations. But he quickly figured that he needed to look away because he was making himself look idiotic.
"Sorry, I'm being too nosy... I can't help it though, I'm so frickin' excited!" He gripped the bag of chips in his hands.
The stranger was Jett Dawson, the Ultimate Drag Racer. Someone that would change his whole perspective of Eden's Garden Academy. Bring him a reason.
Mark quietly murmured his own name to him, biting down on his crusty lips.
At the sudden fascination that Jett showed for him, Mark couldn't really believe he had no hidden intentions. He didn't want more people complimenting his work, even though his life was surrounded by it. He couldn't escape it. So, the only escape could only be—
"Cool name dude, had a friend of a friend named Mark when I was younger." Jett smiled at him, seemingly unbothered by Mark's tense aura. "Or was it Matt?"
Jett was truly handsome. Someone Mark couldn't take his eyes from. He might even recognize him from the news, he was good at what he did, drag racing, whatever, Mark didn't know a lot about that modality. He was wearing a red hoodie and some basic sweatpants. He looked comfortable. He couldn't miss the details on his face either, Mark didn't even know how he had noticed the freckles on his face, but he did, he must have been staring at him a lot.
His heart seemed to pick up the pace. Despite his regular self being anxious as always, he truly felt something. The golden retriever energy radiating from him. How could someone so endearing exist?
✧ ────── ✧
Mark and Jett became friends since then; he didn't even know how. But Jett had called him his friend, he even had a dumb nickname for him. They hung out often. Mark wasn't used to things like that. They would sit together in class, while Mark tried to focus, he couldn't take his mind off Jett, his heart was constantly up in frequency, like a ticking bomb that would never explode.
He hadn't felt like that in a long while. But this time it felt even more intense since it wasn't a completely one-sided relationship.
Mark had been with guys before, but not in the way he had craved. He would never reach the expectations of others, so he would often dwell in rejection. He was familiar with it to the point that he felt nothing else but hopelessness when it came to relationships. But he couldn't control his feelings, he couldn't control the disappointment that would follow crashing on his body every time. The relapsing was evident all across Mark's body, he was extremely underweight, his eyebags were dense and his cheeks were hollowed from the lack of body fat.
He was afraid of feeling the same with Jett, so he'd keep accumulating more and more of that sensation of irremediable pain when it came to his future.
Of course that when it came to them, Mark tended to be a bit bitter with him. He genuinely didn't know how to socialize with him, so he'd often end up insulting Jett because he felt frustrated talking to someone that wasn't behind a computer screen. But Jett would look at him with a shit-eating grin every time, laughing at his words as if he said something really funny. Jett often went along with the jokes, and Mark didn't seem to mind. He'd even catch himself smiling sometimes.
It was no surprise that Jett was a very liked person. He was cheerful, extroverted despite sometimes saying weird things and having a shitty humor. He was also good looking, even if he didn't have the standard handsome man body, he had a nice face that people could look at. Unlike Mark.
Jett had other friends other than him, mostly from his class too, so Mark knew them. He heard them whisper about him, but Jett had always intervened, protecting his friend.
"Hey! Don't be mean to broskii, he's just a bit under the weather... all the time!"
Mark stood next to him, crossing his arms against his chest, feeling like sinking deeper in his embarrassment. He was bad at making friends. Those often required a lot of effort to maintain. But with Jett, everything felt easier, because he understood him.
"Sorry broskii!! That was just a joke, trying to make you smile, you know?" Cassidy said in her usual excited tone. "ANYWAYS! I was just thinking about organizing a late-night gaming session in the lounge room, my room has plenty of stuff that we could use! Including some old ass games."
"Are you kidding me???? I'D LOVE TO GO! Tonight?"
"Yessir! Are you also a gaming enthusiast??" She exclaimed equally as excited as Jett was.
Mark watched the two classmates get along and he just stood there, not saying a word, all while Eva made eye contact with him, he suddenly felt vermin crawling under his skin and making him itchy. The fellow mathlete always had an intimidating stare; he sometimes wondered if that's what people felt when he stared at them too. He had been told by Jett that he had a pretty intimidating glare, even though most of the time he was neutral, not showing much emotion.
At last, the two had agreed on making a somewhat big event for that purpose. Mark didn't see the point of being there but was suddenly brought up by his classmate.
"Mark, you should come too! You could be the DJ and play us some music." Kai said, running a hand through his own peach-colored hair. Mark started to sweat a bit hearing those words, but he didn't want to be a party pooper for once, so he nodded.
"Yippie!!! Broskii is coming?!! Jett seemed in genuine awe for his friend's agreement. Wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
Mark tensed up with his eagerness, but felt a flush creeping on his face nonetheless.
✧ ────── ✧
He helped the crew transport the video game console to the lounge room on the same floor, it seemed to be high-tech and the newest model. It was definitely an expensive item. Before he also carried out his music station. It had been untouched until now, but Mark had surely not forgotten about how to use it, especially since he could easily feel muscle memory take over him completely by the mere act of hovering his fingers on the DJ pad.
He had Jett and Jean carry the heaviest items, while he carried the folding keyboard under his shoulder. He felt his throat pressing hard against any oxygen he was trying to breathe in, making him feel more vulnerable to anything happening around him. After some mindless walking, they had been able to carry the things to the lounge, where Cassidy, Kai, Damon and Grace were waiting, as well as Eva who was taking a soda from the vending machine nearby. Mark only had to set up the wires and cables to everything and start working. But as soon as he got on his knees, he felt lightheaded. He tried to overcome it and not bring any attention to him, so he continued to make his way to the closest outlet and connect the DJ stand. It had been fine until he felt a big warm hand on his back.
"Did you do it?" Jett asked, looking out for Mark who was on the floor connecting the master cable to the outlet, not noticing his discomfort.
"Yeah." He murmured right afterwards, slowly getting up on his own and seeing the lights of his DJ pad lighting up.
"Cass!!! Mark did it!" He suddenly exclaimed, earning a pleased laugh from Cassidy.
Mark looked down at the colorful lights on the DJ pad, shivers creeped down his spine, when he suddenly overheard a conversation nearby between Jett and Cassidy.
"Ughh my back!" She complained out loud once she finished setting up the HDMI cables on the monitor.
"You alright there?" Jett chuckled at her dramatic intonation.
"Yeahhh! Don't worry man, I'm used to this, gaming posture, you know how it is."
"Mm'kay, what do we have in the menu today then?" He asked Cassidy, looking through the different CD cases. "I wanna play some fighting games!"
Mark had tuned out of the real world from now onwards, he watched the pair interact with such casualty that he felt his stomach churning. He didn't realize he had been so out of himself that a simple hand on his shoulder made him jump.
"Mark, are you okay?" Jean's voice went through Mark's ear and left through the other. "You know, if you're not feeling okay, you can tell us."
He turned to look at Jean who was currently looking at him with a mix of seriousness but also concern. That man was indeed pretty intimidating, but in reality, he's a chill guy.
"Yeah, I'm fine, sure." Mark quickly locked in on his task. He started by getting access to his Cloud storage and loading his music. He soured at the idea of having to play his music, since he thought that it was horrible and had very bad mixing. As well as other flaws that he hadn't bothered to change, as he thought it was more of the same, the true issue here was that the formulas of his songs sucked by themselves. He started to play something and let it cycle through a playlist; he adjusted the volume to not make it too loud. Mark thought about how stupid it was to bring all his equipment here if he would just play pre-made music. He wanted to beat himself for that.
No one seemed to mind it though. They were there for the hangout after all. Speaking of which, he saw Eva and Damon talking to one another and they weren't exactly interacting with the rest, even though Damon had voiced his interest in videogames before. After a bit, Mark left the music station and headed towards where Jett, Cassidy, Grace and Kai were.
"Broskii! Ooooh... What's this sweet melody filling my ears now?" He looked incredibly pleased, making Mark perk up unexpectedly.
"Just some stuff I made when I was bored." He didn't know what to say. After all, he had been producing music a lot while high, so he could work, comply with the deadlines his managers gave him and get paid.
"This ain't that bad for a Soybean like you." Grace interjected with her usual sass.
"Yeah! This is actually fire dude!" Cassidy came up out of nowhere, bouncing on her heels with a grin.
Mark looked around himself, seeing that they were having fun. They enjoyed his music. Yet he couldn't manage saying anything else.
"Is this electropop? I swear I've heard this somewhere before." Kai said, scratching the back of his head.
"Y-yeah, it is." He replied, getting considerably tense.
"Hey buddy, don't look so down, okay? You make good stuff." Jett said, looking at him with a sweet smile on his face. That was enough to keep Mark's heart beat up the whole time.
Mark just wanted to grow wings and fly out of there. So instead of saying something else, he went back to his music station and sat down on a chair.
Jett was confused yet not surprised; he was used to the silent treatment.
"What's wrong with him?" Eva stepped into the conversation, whispering to the rest.
"He's so full of himself." Damon huffed.
"I'm pretty sure he just needs some time alone." Jett quickly intervened, feeling hurt at the words being thrown like that without second thought.
After a while, they all sat down to play some games and chat, while Mark watched from a corner. He had noticed Eva on the other corner too, she didn't seem up for it, just like him, but she was doing something interesting, such as playing on a handheld gaming device. He stared at Jett from across the room, seeing the back of his head and the way his laughter filled the whole room as he played a 2vs2 fighting game against Cassidy.
He couldn't say that it wasn't her fault that he was feeling like that, but if Jett was smiling at someone else but him, he wanted them to perish. Even if most of the time he didn't give Jett good reasons to smile, nonetheless, Mark was fearing anything related to him that could imply distancing himself from Jett. He was getting tired and feeling gradually sicker as he stayed in the same room that his music was playing. He wanted to blame the music, because truly he wasn't going to admit his true feelings. Mark got up and approached Jett from behind as they were all crowding the couch where Damon and Kai were having their turns at the game.
"I'm going to my room." He said, his voice too quiet to be comprehensible. Before Jett could even process it, Mark was already leaving the lounge room.
Mark felt like the biggest idiot out there. He had left because he was getting a little too giddy over Jett and didn't want to see him with other people. He stomped all the way to his dorm, closing the door behind him and slowly sliding down until he was sitting on the floor. His heart was still racing, every time he thought about it, he'd only feel more nervous, thoughts of Jett filled his mind and he was slowly losing it. Eventually after freaking out for a hot minute, he got up and stripped down to put some sleepwear on. Mark has never been a fancy person, so he settled in a shirt and some shorts.
His heart rate was still high even when he was in more comfortable attire, he could still hear the music in his mind and it shook his skull so deeply it physically hurt. If only he was less of a coward and stood in the same place for longer. He wanted to be near Jett, but his fears and insecurities got the best of him. Mark laid down on his plain white bed, hugging himself tightly while drifting away from reality.
His alternate reality consisted of Jett. He would be his. No one to get in the way of what could have been Mark's redemption arc.
It was pathetic to think that he felt so awful that Jett was a normal person, with normal friends, when Mark was everything but normal, however Jett was still friends with him and he could only consider that God's work. Jett was an angel sent specifically for him. To take him out of his horrible state and unhealthy lifestyle. He was far from being normal, Jett was perfect, normal people aren't perfect. Therefore, Jett is a flawless individual and he should never doubt it.
Mark spent too much time simply thinking about Jett, daydreaming. He still felt his stomach hurt from jealousy. He wondered what could have happened by now. He was paranoid about getting talked behind his back. Maybe Jett could be making out with Cassidy? He would never know, because he hadn't been able to stay longer. He had left his music equipment there, but he didn't care, they could keep it. Mark didn't miss it one bit, not when he missed Jett more. Fucking hell.
Mark rolled onto his stomach, pressing his head down onto the pillow and letting out a long-frustrated sigh, with the help of his hands, he reached out for the same pillow and began to dig his nails into the soft fabric, trying to let out some pent-up frustration in his soul. He let his muscles come loose after a bit. Staying in the same position for a while before coming up and gasping for air. He'd taught himself to calm down in various unusual ways, restricting his oxygen until he almost passed out wasn't the healthiest option... But he could have been doing something far worse.
He didn't want to go back to heavy drugs, he'd take his anti-depressants every day and only take the sedatives if he really needed them. Mark had been regaining some self-control lately and he was minimally proud of himself. After catching his breath, he rolled onto his back, staring at the bland ceiling while his chest went up and down. For a moment, his thoughts filled with Jett and his gorgeous face. Mark jumped when he saw his face so close, even though he just wanted to kiss it, he also noticed it was nothing more but his brain playing tricks on him, he felt warm all over and he was going far beyond what he intended to do tonight. Regardless, he dipped under the covers and laid on his side, closing his eyes and trying to get some rest. He was crazy, he would never fall asleep without his meds, and he was fully aware of that. The events earlier had caused his brain to fully short-circuit. He had the craziest daydream experience that any guy his age would experience, whether it could be a plot for a horror movie or—
Mark rested for what seemed to be an eternity, almost an hour had gone by before he heard his door being opened.
"Broskii, I'm here to return your equipment!" Jett said, breaking the silence in the room. Mark and Jett had exchanged copies of keys to each other's dorms, an undeniable sign of trust, where Jett could just walk in and throw a surprise sleepover, as it happened before multiple times in the past.
"I was also... worried." He also said, carrying his DJ station inside almost effortlessly, if that wasn't enough, he had some bags of food piled over it. "I brought you takeout too."
Mark sat up, turning on the light on the nightstand, he had assuredly felt his chest tightening around his heart at the sound of his words. He watched as Jett came closer to him with his things, placing them near his desk and his laptop on top of it. He also smelled warm food coming from those bags. Mark really didn't mind eating at 11 pm.
"Sorry bud, were ya sleeping?" Jett continued as he hadn't said something absolutely groundbreaking.
"You know I don't sleep so easily..." He grumbled, rubbing his eyes like a sleepy kitten. "I hope you had fun... Without me there."
Once he said that, he scooted over the edge the bed and sat there. Lowering his head in a dumb attempt to hide his flustered expression.
"Don't be silly, I did not have fun losing all of my matches. And you weren't there watching me, so I think that's why I lost. " He pretended to sulk, not going over the real issue. "I got you a sad shawarma and fries. Because we ordered it like half an hour ago, so they're not exactly warm."
"Thanks, I'm actually starving." Mark said, not stepping over his words for once.
Jett smiled softly at him, but something about his expression had an undertone of agitation. "Are you alright?" He ended up asking.
He feared the confrontation coming from Jett, that he had been careful around him but ended up blowing his cover because of his impulses. No, he wasn't fine, he felt like he was going to rip his hair off and it was all because of this idiot that he was actually afraid of losing for another person who was clearly better than him. All of that just to give him a little nod.
"Talk to me? Please." He softly pleaded, those words easily struck Mark thoroughly, making him feel his brain combusting with all sorts of thoughts.
"It's quite embarrassing but my stomach has been hurting." Mark explained it, crossing his arms over his stomach. He knew it wasn't simple. He wished it was. But that Mark's brain had too much control over him and it caused him to feel things more intensely than others. "Anxious." He added with an almost breathy tone.
"About what?" He intently looked at Mark, genuinely worried.
"Dumb things." Mark wiped a tear that threatened to run down his cheek.
He felt so much right now. He couldn't even begin to explain it all. That his stomachache was just the tip of the iceberg. If he was pushed enough, he'd probably just lose his mind.
"Broskii, nothing about you is dumb."
"I AM dumb, but I can't do anything about it. You can just go to your other... friends." He murmured bitterly.
Jett was thrown off by his words, seriously, after 6 months of being best buddies, he just decided to change his mind? Obviously Jett couldn't be completely angry at Mark, he knew his internal struggles, and he had his own too.
"What are you talking about?" He looked deeply concerned and hurt. "Do you hear yourself right now?"
Mark heard him and felt like smashing his head against a brick wall, why was it so hard for him to talk and get through his thoughts? He couldn't look at Jett or else he'd burst down into tears. With the tense ambience around them, no one could properly say anything, Mark sighed.
"Jett, do you like Cassidy?"
"Nyeh...? Well, of course I like her, she's our friend after all, she's a girl in a dude way. She's fun!" Jett seemed to drop his positive act when he saw Mark so down.
He bit the inside of his cheeks and nervously chewed, his fingers were intertwined with one another, making him look like the most insecure person on the planet at that moment.
Jett slowly reached out for Mark, both of his hands coming to cup Mark's face and turn him so he could face Jett, despite that, he still avoided his gaze. Mark was sure he needed to keep avoiding Jett's eyes or else he'd lose control. He was not doing well. He was not sane or stable to make decisions right now.
"Is something the matter? Why can't you look at me anymore?" He didn't want to sound mad, but he felt more frustrated and hurt than when Mark would usually give him the cold shoulder.
If that wasn't enough, Mark let out a small whimper, as if he was bearing the last bits of his restraints. He leaned against Jett's palm and quickly latched on his forearm, keeping him close with an unusually strong grip, as he began to nuzzle on him like a kitty. Mark looked like he was doing it unconsciously. Mark's thoughts were full of Jett, how he wished that Jett only had eyes for him and such. He was successful right now, because when he glanced up at him, he saw the way he looked like a startled puppy. He eventually moved closer only to find himself smashing his lips against Jett's.
He led Jett's hands so they would be resting on his back, all while he savored the moment of kissing him for the first time, he had pulled away for a bit just to catch his breath because he wasn't lasting very much with the impact of having Jett right where he wanted. Mark was the one taking the lead, deepening the kiss and tilting his head to the sides so he could get more, more, more. He was intoxicated. He was kissing a man for real this time, he didn't mean it in the way he had with other guys in the past. Jett also showed to be into it, grabbing a hold of Mark's hair and not pulling him away, he was aware that Mark's kiss was sloppy and messy, like he was trying the to hit the best spots in himself, he was like a wild animal devouring his mouth, no matter how bad his breath stunk of junk food from earlier.
When Mark used his tongue and slid it across his teeth, Jett opened almost in instinct. Just when they had battled tongues for the first time, Jett grabbed a hold of his shoulders and pushed him away.
"Dude... I don't think this is a good idea." Jett had kissed Mark for the first time and he felt his body acting up too.
Mark looked out of himself, he looked like a little wet cat that was rejected treats. He felt incredible, high on the feeling of Jett's mouth on his, he couldn't let go and whenever he did, he was already suffering from the loss and wanting more. He grabbed Jett by his shoulders and got impossibly closer to him. There, he could have a better grip on him and pull him into another kiss. This time, he could use more of his tongue and leave a mess of spit on his lips, since Mark was actually salivating for this moment to happen in a long time. He felt every inch of his body burning with passion while he kissed Jett and he couldn't stop himself. Jett was under him, taking everything Mark had to give him, he felt suffocated by his overwhelming display of affection, but it wasn't completely unpleasant. He let himself go too. Kissing his best friend wasn't in his mind most of the time, but it had definitely happened before, just randomly.
When Mark pushed him down on the mattress and continued kissing him, he could feel things starting to spice up, especially by the way Mark was moaning in his mouth and moving his hips against his uncontrollably. Jett knew he would be crossing something he wasn't sure about if he didn't stop.
"Jett... You don't want me too?" Mark asked after he was pushed off from his mouth, he was certainly feeling things in his body that weren't very appropriate.
"Everything's happening too fast." He breathed out, still recovering from the intense make out session.
He had expected Jett to say something like that, after all, there was no way he'd reciprocate, right? Jett would never want to see him again after this, right???
"I like you a lot, really. I just need some time to think." Jett added, those words felt like a stab to his heart.
"Did I just kiss Cassidy through your lips...? Damon or Kai?" Mark murmured under his breath, feeling his voice trembling with each word that left his mouth.
"Pfft... Of course not dummy." Jett gave Mark a smile, attempting to soothe his nerves.
Mark looked down at Jett, seeing his beautiful face glancing up at him, his eyes remained unchanged and warm. Mark felt his own heart wanting to jump out of his mouth. "Jett... I think I’m in love with you."
Those words left his mouth in a matter of seconds, letting Jett know what he was up to, instead of replying with disgust or rejection, he just continued to smile.
"You just think? You aren't?"
"Dumbass, ugh leave me alone..." Mark suddenly deflated on top of Jett, pressing his head against his chest. Somewhere he hadn't thought to be so comfortable.
Jett tensed for a second, realizing that Mark needed his affection. He was like an animal that would flee if he did any sudden move, he had to capture Mark somehow. "I had a slight suspicion... Since you were staring at me and giving an ugly glare to Cassidy the whole time you were there." He proceeded to move his hand on top of Mark's back, feeling the way he shivered.
Mark just retreated more into himself, feeling ashamed for what he was, he was an avoidant when he was alone, but he felt clingy and possessive over Jett. "Awh, look at you being all docile now."
"Shut up." He murmured, his voice being slightly muffled against Jett's shirt.
"Seriously now, hey! Do you think I'd be doing shit behind your back? Woah, I feel hurt Broskii."
Mark frowned, remaining on that safe bubble that Jett provided him right now, if possible, he'd start purring, just like his cat would do once she settled on his lap. He missed her so much. "I just... I feel all over the place sometimes. I want to feel secure." He whispered those last words.
With him lying on his chest, Jett listened to Mark talk as if nothing had happened earlier, he understood it had been a matter of impulse despite now fully aware of Mark's feelings, he wouldn't throw them away for anything, hell he did actually feel the same. He just hadn't realized it yet.
"You're safe here, y'know that?" Jett ended up saying, running a finger down Mark's spine, the same guy who had just been kissing him mercilessly earlier. They didn't want to remember that, but deep down it had been something real and unforgettable for both, and Mark couldn't stop thinking about the feeling of Jett's plump and alluring lips. He would now take Jett's words into account and fight his urge to do anything stupid.
With one reassuring squeeze, Jett slowly sat up with Mark still leaning against his chest, pliant and soft. "Do you feel better?" He whispered.
Mark could only wrap his arms around Jett, he probably looked like a clingy freak right now, but he was doing what was right to him in that moment. He wanted his scent all over him; to feel his wide shoulders and thick arms wrapped around his smaller back, it made him feel considerably small and he enjoyed it. He was feeling like himself, not the usual big musical prodigy Mayhem.
"I want no one but you." He said, pressing against Jett once more. He just couldn't stop being a sap, he had entered a point to no return.
"I want you too broskii!"
Jett hugged Mark, burying his face on Mark's shoulder and squeezing quite tightly, the type of squeeze that would make Mark feel at home. He felt peace and his worries melting away like all he wanted was to be there with him and no one else. With Jett's words, Mark burst down in tears, a strong hiccup ripping through his chest, making him feel miserable all over again.
What was the chance of having Jett return his feelings? He had no one do that before, Mark felt hysterically miserable even if it was because of something good, yet he had Jett to ground him on earth, telling him it was okay and that he had nothing to do with anyone behind his back, that he only had eyes for him since the beginning.
Mark loved this boy so dearly and he had no way how to deal with it.
"HEYYYY!!! Hold on are you cryin'?? Fuck..." Jett was startled out of his mind before eventually easing into the embrace, rubbing his back up and down while Mark was still crying his eyes out, he cradled him like he was a baby.
"No, it’s just raining here..." Mark murmured between clear sobs, wanting to act cocky but he couldn't.
"No shit, I feel my shirt getting wet with all this rain! Damn broskii you're crying a whole waterfall." He chuckled, running his fingers through Mark's thin hair strands. Through all those tears, Mark let out a weak laugh, still tearing up like crazy and sobbing while laughing. It was a weird sensation he hasn't felt before. Crying for a good thing... It all felt the same, it wrecked him in the same way and it bothered him.
"Lemme give broskii a bro kiss now." He said with an amusing laugh leaving his lips, he leaned down to grab hold of Mark's chin and tilt it up so he could get access to Mark's thin and scarred ones, probably from chewing on them so many times.
"Idiot." Mark murmured lovingly. When Jett kissed him again, Mark melted into the kiss almost immediately, wasting no time to deepen it so he could gain access of his senses and desires again. He really had a fear of missing out Jett's lips on his, because he wouldn't let go for anything.
✧ ────── ✧
It was after midnight by now and Mark was eating his cold shawarma wrap next to Jett, his mind high on the clouds as he thought about the gorgeous man he had somehow managed to pull.
He didn't plan on letting him go soon. Not when he was anything but healthy when it came to Jett. He’d it figure out later.