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what if the way you hold me, is actually what's holy?

Summary:

"I wish you didn't make this a part of the tour, though," Nick broke the silence, still not taking his eyes away from the ceiling.

"Why?"

"Because it took all of the strength in me to not say 'fuck it' to our entire careers and lives and kiss you in that moment."

"Wanna hear the worst part?" Chris replied, turning around to look at Nick's face.

He was breathtaking.

"I would have let you do that."

 

Or,

 

the aftermath of Chris' tattoos surprise.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

The tattoos surprise had been a complete success. Chris had a feeling the fans were going to love it, but he could've never anticipated the screams and cheers of their audience.

Even if he couldn't outwardly say how much he actually loved his brothers, he was still deeply thankful for the fans and their never-ending support of their relationship.

Even if they didn't know the full story.

 

"So... what do you think?" he asked the second they entered their hotel room.

 

The ride from the venue to the hotel they were staying in had been pretty quiet. Besides a few handholds here and there, Chris was a bit scared that he might've gone over the line with this.

He knew how they all felt about each other, and how devoted they all were. But this was new.

He had tattooed their names after fully expressing how he could never get a tattoo — especially a tattoo about someone else, because to him, that was the biggest sign of love and devotion in his eyes.

Nick and Matt had tattoos about him and each other, sure.

But to tattoo their names? That was very romantic, and to keep it a secret for six months and reveal it in front of an audience that didn't know the extent of their relationship had been risky, to say the least.

 

"Chris, I... I'm honestly still speechless. I don't —" Matt broke the silence first, sitting down on their hotel room's bed and not making eye contact.

 

Chris sat down next to him and looked at their oldest brother, who had turned away from them and stood still in the middle of the room.

 

"Nick, what do you thi—?"

 

"Marry me."

 

"What?" Chris thought he might've misheard his brother. His head was already fuzzy.

 

"Chris. Matt. I don't care. I genuinely don't care about anything else. Just... please." Nick had started crying, and he looked like he was on the verge of a panic attack.

 

Matt quickly rose up from his seat on the bed and caressed Nick's sides. "Nick, are you okay?"

 

"I love you so fucking much." Nick's tears wouldn't stop falling down his cheeks, and he was shaking, but that didn't stop him from grabbing Matt's hands like they were the most fragile thing on earth.

 

"I love you too, but what's going on?" Matt questioned, worried about the oldest's well-being.

 

"Are you serious?" Chris asked from the side. He had long since stopped moving around out of sheer nervousness.

 

"Dead serious. I'll do the —" Nick, very wonkily, got down on one knee. He grabbed onto their right hands and looked into their eyes like it was his last time seeing them. "Will you marry me?"

 

"Nick, we... we can't —" Matt giggled nervously at Nick's behavior while wiping his own tears with his free hand. He would be lying if he said his heart wasn't beating at the speed of light.

 

"I don't care. Will you marry me?" Nick desperately asked again, looking between both of his brothers and focusing on Chris, who hadn't moved in a while.

 

"Yes. Of fucking course, Nick. Are you kidding me?" Chris jumped from his seat on the bed into Nick's arms, quickly tumbling them both down to the floor in the process.

 

Wet giggles and kisses echoed throughout the room, and the two didn't even care about getting up. They didn't care about the hotel room's carpet poking their very sweaty clothes or the fact that they were supposed to sleep early tonight. It was just them in that moment.

Matt had stayed frozen in place, looking at his brothers with a teary smile on his face. He loved them more than he loved his own life.

 

"Are you gonna marry us too or what?" Nick chimed in from his spot on the floor. Chris looked up immediately as well at their other brother, who took no time in jumping to the floor with them and crushing them in the process.

 

"I'd marry you any fucking day of my life. Marry you a thousand times if I could." Matt was never the one to say what he really meant, but with them? He knew he could say or do whatever and they'd always have his back.

 

"Good."

 

"Good." Chris and Matt replied in sync, which only made them all laugh again, moving around on the floor like they were little kids again.

 

After their laughter died down, they stayed on the floor for a few minutes in silence. The only sounds were their breathing and the synchronized beating of their hearts.

They were looking up at the hotel room's ceiling like they were stargazing, and their hands found their way to each other's like it was second nature.

 

"I wish you didn't make this a part of the tour, though," Nick broke the silence, still not taking his eyes away from the ceiling.

 

"Why?"

 

"Because it took all of the strength in me to not say 'fuck it' to our entire careers and lives and kiss you in that moment."

 

"Wanna hear the worst part?" Chris replied, turning around to look at Nick's face.

 

He was breathtaking.

 

"I would have let you do that."

 

Nick also turned around to look at Chris after his confession. He didn't say anything. He hoped that the way he was looking at him was enough — enough to let him know how much he loved him, how he always would. Chris was his everything.

 

"Were you serious about the proposal?" Matt asked in between them, who hadn't missed a second of his brothers' intimate moment.

 

"Yeah," Nick said sternly, looking down at Matt, still not able to hide his lovesick gaze.

 

"Good," Matt muttered before continuing, "because I've been thinking about it for a while, and I actually didn't know how to bring it up, so I'm glad you both did it for me instead."

 

"What did you think about?"

 

"Promise rings," Matt replied, getting up from his spot on the floor and walking to his backpack, where he started looking for something in the front pocket. "We can't get married officially, so I thought promise rings would do the trick. We don't have to wear them when we go out, but..." He finally found what he was looking for and went back to his seat on the floor.

He opened his palm, and three silver rings looked back at Nick and Chris. "This could work."

 

"Wh... How? When?" Chris asked, feeling like his eyes were going to come out of his skull.

 

"Told you. I've been meaning to ask you for a while, but I never knew when to properly do it," Matt confessed, looking at the rings in his palm before continuing. "I wanted to do like a big 'movie style' proposal, but I feel like what happened today is perfect for us."

 

He looked up from the rings and softly grabbed Chris's right hand. "Chris, may I?"

Chris dumbfoundedly nodded at Matt's question, his mouth not fully closed yet. Matt carefully slid the ring onto Chris's ring finger.

 

He moved around and grabbed Nick's ring from his other palm. "Nick, may I?"

 

Matt was looking at him with the purest expression of love Nick had ever seen. No movie or show or anything could compare to the way Matt was looking at him. He felt the tears come out again, wetly giggled, and then nodded. "You're insane. You two are going to kill me tonight."

Matt giggled with his own tears escaping as well and carefully slid the ring onto Nick's ring finger.

 

Chris grabbed the third ring before it could accidentally fall to the floor and held Matt's right hand, not before stopping altogether and turning around to look at Nick. "Wait, Nick. We should do it together."

 

"Chris..." Nick sighed, fauxing annoyance but still incredibly in love with his little brother's intent on having them all together and included in everything they did.

 

"Come on, we're getting married! Put some energy into it."

 

Nick couldn't even find it in himself to care about anything else at the moment. He slowly grabbed the other end of the ring, and they both slid it onto Matt's ring finger — not before Nick noticed the hidden inscription inside the ring:

 

August 1st, 2003 - Forever.

Notes:

never let me rewatch the tattoos surprise vid again, that shit will kill me !!!!

 

anyways, big shoutout to twi for beta-ing this for me & encouraging me to share my fics !! ilyyy

and ofc a big thank u to all the commune members on twt for encouraging and supporting me aswell !!

hope everyone enjoyed reading this even if it was rlly short and had some corny bits. it's okay, we all need some fluffest every once in a while <3