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Connor had a raging headache and eyes so droopy he thought they’d slip shut any second, now. He had a horrible-tasting drink, something with cheap Vodka (ironic, given how supposedly VIP the event was) and a syrup so sweet that he couldn’t handle another sip. He’d eaten what they gave out at the Met Gala earlier, a steak so raw that Connor thought the poor cow was still mooing on his plate. People surrounded him, some he knew and others he didn’t, all wanting to make conversation with him as if they were best friends. He was grateful, of course, he was, but he wanted to go home. He wanted to be on his comfortable couch, watching a movie with his best friend or boyfriend.
Hudson was here too, somewhere. They had agreed to mingle first before finding each other. They needed to make friends, Connor had said, but he was quickly regretting his words. All he wanted was to find Hudson and pull him into a quiet room, just to be.
He hadn’t seen Hudson in so long. They spent maybe thirty minutes together at the Met Gala, side by side, smiling and making conversation with rich people they didn’t even like. They had to pretend like they weren’t dying to touch each other, pull each other close, and giggle into each other’s hair, whispering I missed you. Instead, they smiled at each other and stuck together for the allowed time before having to part.
From across the room, Hudson ate off of a girl's plate like he had eaten steak off of Kendall Jenner’s at the Met. The after-party was worse. At least at the Met, Connor was close to Hudson, trying to have a good time, but at the after-party, people kept taking him away from Connor, begging for his attention. Connor wasn’t too far behind him either, with multiple celebrities coming up to him to introduce themselves, most of them were nice, but Connor was a good judge of character, and when he felt someone else’s energy seemed off, he strayed away. He wondered if Hudson felt the same. Most of the people that latched onto his arms were people hoping to leech off of Hudson’s fame; everyone, with the exception of his makeup artist, who stood behind him with a happy but bored expression on her face.
Smiling politely at the person in front of him, he kindly gestured to the stairway that led upstairs all the way to the roof.
“I think I need a smoke,” he laughed. The person grinned and nodded.
“Don’t we all, buddy. Have fun. Nice meeting you,” the guy said with a kind smile. He was one of the good ones. Connor wished he remembered his name.
He placed his terrible drink on a random table and stuffed his hands inside his trousers pockets, still eyeing Hudson, who was busy having a conversation with a girl Connor did not know but seemed nice enough. He smiled a little before finally moving up the stairs, focusing on finding the roof.
Up on the roof, he was surprised no one was there. A couple of couches were displayed with fairy lights, giving the ambience a cozy feeling, and Connor decided this would be where he would spend the rest of his night until his team came to get him. He didn’t bother texting Hudson. He wanted him to have fun. He lit up a cigarette and leaned over the bar on the roof, looking out into the city lights.
The nightlife in NYC wasn’t as crazy as people made it out to be. It was crazier in LA, but Connor still felt more at ease in LA than he did in NYC.
He took a deep drag of his cigarette, brushing the guilty feeling after promising to quit aside.
Being alone was a blessing and a curse.
While he wanted to be alone, he wouldn’t mind the presence of his boyfriend. The last time he truly saw him was after they had confessed their feelings to each other. Since then, messages were exchanged, and short FaceTime calls that Connor held deeply in his heart. Those were the best parts of his day. When Hudson would FaceTime him just to say he missed him and loved him, the words now have a double meaning.
All Connor wanted to do was spend some time with him. Not even in bed, though that’d be great too, but he wanted to simply be next to him. Breathe him in and run his hands through his gelled hair. He wanted to inspect Hudson’s makeup up close and analyze the meaning. Someone had said it was a swan concept, whatever that meant. Connor wanted Hudson to tell him about it. He looked beautiful at the Gala. His suit hugged his body perfectly, and his hair swooped up to the side so elegantly that Connor wanted to mess it up just so that he could prove to everyone that Hudson would let him.
For the after-party, he had changed. He took his makeup off and styled his all white boxer-style shorts with a black beret and fresh grills in his teeth that made Connor chuckle fondly.
Of course, he’d get grills.
Connor took another deep drag, letting the smoke engulf his lungs for a little longer before puffing it out.
He thought about the almost silly grills that Hudson sported on and how good they’d look against his dick. He shook his head and frowned. He was not about to get hard at a party with hundreds of people over his boyfriend's grills.
Someone must’ve opened the door to the rooftop because Connor could hear the muffled laughter and music from the party. With his elbows resting on the bar, he turned his head to look at the door, seeing who came up.
He shouldn’t have been surprised to see Hudson standing there with a wide smile, the gray and white from his grills shining underneath the fairy lights.
“Connie,” Hudson breathed out. He opened his arms and sped walked to Connor, who snuffed out his cigarette on the floor with his foot. He’d think about the littering later.
“Baby,” Connor said when Hudson crashed into him harshly, pulling him close to his chest and breathing him in deeply. Hudson and Connor were about the same height, but somehow Hudson always seemed much smaller when he hugged him. He tucked his face into Connor’s shoulder and smiled against him, finally happy to wrap his arms around him like he had been wanting to do for months.
Connor held on to him just as tightly, never missing the way Hudson sniffled a few times. He rubbed his cheek against his and laughed.
“Missed me that much, Huddy?”
Hudson mumbled something against his shoulder, and Connor had to pull away slightly from him to understand.
“What was that?” He asked.
Hudson didn’t pull away.
“I said, missed you so much, I wanted to die.”
“I almost did,” Connor said, pulling him closer.
“This shit is so hard, Connor, I fucking hate it,” Hudson said.
Connor tried not to overthink.
“I hate it too. But we’ll work it out, right?” Connor asked hopefully.
Hudson finally pulled apart from Connor, lifting his head and looking right at him. He had residue eyeliner on his bottom lash. The fairy lights made his brown eyes somehow even browner, like the color of freshly brewed coffee, and once again, Connor was punched with the feeling of love all over again.
“Course we will. Because we love each other,” Hudson said. His voice wavered the tiniest bit in nerves, and Connor thought he has nothing to worry about. So Connor looked around, making sure they were alone, before lifting his hand to hold Hudson’s face, bringing him close enough to touch his lips with his own. His eyes slipped shut when Hudson pushed his lips further onto his, kissing him hard yet lovingly, like he couldn’t wait to taste him. Connor tasted like cigarettes and strawberry, and Hudson was obsessed.
He had waited for months and now that he had his boyfriend right where he wanted, he wasn’t letting go.
The kiss turned messy. They moved their tongues against each other, fighting for dominance, dominance that Hudson didn’t even care for, which resulted in him opening his mouth wider, inviting Connor, and admitting defeat. Was he really defeated when Connor was kissing him like that? He who ran his tongue against his grills, feeling the bumps and the tooth with a gem.
Hudson walked Connor back to the couches, lips still attached to one another's, and he straddled Connor’s waist. He didn’t roll his hips down, though he wanted to; he wanted to take his time. He wanted to savor Connor’s kisses and his touch as he rubbed Hudson’s back, pushing him further into him. There was nothing sexual about the kiss.
Well, there was, but it wasn’t the type of kiss that would result in naked bodies, but more like naked souls, and Hudson felt bare naked right now with Connor underneath him, moaning in happiness. He laid out all of his wishes through the kiss. How he wanted Connor with him all of the time, how he wanted to see him and taste him, how much he missed him, he laid all of his secrets through a kiss. Connor seemed to understand his language pretty well, reciprocating his confession through open-mouth kisses.
Hudson was the first to pull away.
“Fuck, I wanted to do that all night long,” he said, pecking Connor one more time.
Connor rubbed his waist with his thumbs, looking up at Hudson with a dopey smile on his face.
“I’m happy you’re here, Huddy,” he said. It almost came out dreamily. Hudson rubbed his thumb back and forth on Connor’s cheek, enjoying how the lights framed his pretty, flushed face.
“I’m happy I'm here, too, with you.”
They talked the entire night. Not leaving the party until the early morning. Separately but happily. No one bothered them on the rooftop. They spent hours catching up, kissing each other, and promising their next meeting would be soon. They still had time. Hudson wasn’t due back in Toronto until the afternoon, and Connor wasn’t flying to Georgia until the evening.
Hudson took a separate cab to Connor’s hotel, where Connor ordered them a bunch of food, knowing Hudson hadn’t eaten well, and then made slow love in the hotel bed for hours into the morning until Hudson absolutely had to go to catch his flight.
He limped out of the shower, pulled his clothes on, and rested his knee beside Connors on the bed, leaning down for a slow, dirty kiss that left Connor reaching up, head following him after he pulled back.
“Call me when you get to Georgia, baby.”
Connor smiled into the kiss.
“Mm, I’ll call you as soon as I'm off the plane.”
They kissed for a few minutes longer before Hudson’s team called him, saying they were going to be late if Hudson didn’t leave for the airport now. He frowned.
Connor looked up sadly, nodding his head towards the door.
“Go. We’ll see each other soon.”
“Promise?”
Connor leaned in for a quick peck.
“Promise, love.” Hudson kissed him one more time, winked, and gathered his things before moving to the door.
“I love you,” he said. No nicknames, no joke, just a simple I love you that had Connor’s heart dancing against his chest.
“I love you, too. Be safe.”
Connor, with half a heart, watched Hudson shut the door behind him and threw himself on the bed, counting down the days until they next saw each other.