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As I look at myself in the mirror, I realize my hands are shaking with anxiety from the thoughts swirling in my head. The light in my room was focused only on me, and everything else was dark; there was no one else but the mirror and me. I was wearing a theater mask with red ribbons and a pastel blue dress; I didn’t think my appearance stood out much—at least not to me. I let out a long sigh as my heart beats faster.
Today was the day; it was the day I was going to confess my feelings for Jax. When I told Zooble about it, she said he would just make fun of me, of my feelings, and that he would do it for a long time.
According to them, they want to look out for me and will secretly tag along to protect me; I know Zooble wants what’s best for me. I know them…
I’d asked him to meet me at 6 p.m. to make all this more romantic—with the sunset—if Jax ends up accepting my feelings.
I close my eyes to focus on my trembling body; my focus is on my hands, moving across my chest until I return to the present, and I open my eyes.
My setting has shifted to a place outside the circus: the beach, one we’ve never been to before. I see Jax in front of me, his right hand on his hip and leaning forward.
—I hope it’s important enough that you insisted on coming here.— he says, a mischievous smile spreading across his face.
I press my lips and eyelids together; my hands intertwine, playing with each other, until finally I lean forward and shout:
—I like you, Jax!
The air grows heavy, and I imagine it does for him too.
—I know you shout from the rooftops to everyone else that you’re not interested in me, but every time we were alone, the times when you and I…!
—Okay, you don’t need to shout-I get it!
I look up and see him blushing despite the dim light of the circus at night; the fireflies were doing their thing, flying around us in a circuitous way.
Jax comes closer to me, takes my chin in his hand, and smiles, still flushed:
—Always so naive about everything.
He starts moving closer to me with his eyes closed. I knew what this meant; I move closer to him…
A punch.
When I open my eyes, I see that it was Zooble who punched Jax.
—Wait, Zooble, Jax accepted me! Why are you hitting him?
—I’m the only one who can kiss Gangle, do you understand, you scum?!
Zooble climbs on top of Jax and starts choking him; Jax struggles to break free from Zooble’s grip, but Zooble is stronger…
I jump into the fight and pull Zooble off Jax; Jax is free and tries to catch his breath.
—Zooble… are you…?
They just avoid looking at me; on top of that, sighs and tries to get closer to keep fighting Jax, but luckily I hold them back.
—You don’t understand. What if he’s just playing with you?
—You don’t really know him! I’ve seen him when we’re alone; I know he’d never hurt me!
—Wow, so two people in love with Gangle—who would’ve thought?— Jax jokes, only to get an elbow from Zooble.
—Zooble, I’m sorry… I can’t return your feelings.
The tense atmosphere from earlier turns to a sad one; I watch as Zooble’s feet begin to move away from us little by little, slowly.
Maybe he needs some space.
—Well, congratulations, now the show has a canon heterosexual couple!
—What are you talking about?...
Jax just laughs and, with his hand resting on my waist, murmurs:
—Now I can show you off as my girlfriend...~
I blush as I hear him whisper; he has a somewhat deep voice, to tell the truth… Though I can’t help but feel bad for Zooble. I really don’t want to lose their friendship… I’m sorry.