Chapter Text
"Kim Dokja."
"...What?"
Two figures could be seen sitting far in an isolated corner of an empty college library. One man, one woman.
"I got tickets."
"Tickets?"
The man had a book- no, multiple books, stacked up in a scrambled pile on his corner of the desk. He was buried in one book, reading glasses propped up his nose while briefly sparing the woman a glance.
"To TWSA."
She sat with one leg over another, back lazily against the spine of her chair. Both her arms stretched to click on her keyboard, her attention occupied.
Kim Dokja looked up for the first time in a while, his glasses tipping lower as he did. His book was held suspended in his hands.
"... TWSA?"
Han Sooyoung's elbows curved to prop on each side of her computer, her body leaning forward when she did so.
"Like, the TWSA."
None of them replied for a while. Well, it was more like Kim Dokja that didn't reply, if the wide-eyed look on his face wasn't considered one.
".... No, you didn't."
"Yes I did."
"We have exams in two weeks."
"Concert's in five days."
The book dropped to his lap.
"Five days!?"
Han Sooyoung glanced up, sparing Kim Dokja's expression just one, subtle look. The sight pleased her very much, and a Cheshire cat's smirk tugged on her lips.
"Five, short, short days." She whispered, her eyes falling back to the screen.
She hoped Kim Dokja kept that look for the rest of the day, actually, so she could share the pure satisfaction of it with everybody else.
"Show them to me. You're lying. You better not be, Han Sooyoung, show them now."
Her fingers flew fast across the keyboard, and quickly spun the laptop to face Kim Dokja. There, it displayed the official TWSA website, with, to Kim Dokja's disbelief, two paid-for front-row tickets.
"You're joking!" He stood up, as abruptly as he could. His chair fell backwards.
It was at this point that Han Sooyoung couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing.
He.. he was really here.
Kim Dokja, himself, a broke college student with no life whatsoever, was at TWSA, one of the biggest bands in the entire world- no, universe. No, multiverse! In whatever way Kim Dokja put it, being here was equivalent to winning the lottery, about 100 times in a row.
The first thing he noticed when he came in was the size. The stadium was huge; he didn't even know Korea had a place this large! Well, it's TWSA, what else could he expect? The next was the lights. Not the lights in the air, but the light sticks.
The sea of people extended far, far beyond where he could see, revolving in a lengthy semi-circle surrounding the main stage. In every direction he turned his head, people held up tiny, glowing sticks in different colors. These were yellow, purple, orange, and blue. It might have seemed like a design, the colors clashing with each other in their own respective ways, but Kim Doka knew exactly.
Yellow was for their main vocalist and founder, Uriel, or Demon-like Judge of Fire.
Purple was for the drummer, the youngest member of the group, ABFD, Abyssal Black Flame Dragon.
Orange was for, his personal favorite, the guitarist. He couldn't count how many times he'd seen their guitarist on billboards, advertisements, and in videos he watched, dreaming that he'd see him in person one day.
Prisoner of the Golden Headband, Sun Wukong.
Well, Kim Dokja wasn't too sure what blue stood for. It could be all of them united if fans couldn't pick a favorite. Or it was for a new member, if there would be one. Kim Dokja doubted it; he liked the group just as it was now. The three of them.
On the way inside, he bought an orange stick, whilst Han Sooyoung took a purple one.
"... Why ABFD?"
"Why not?" She twirled the stick between her fingers, the purple color illuminating when she shook it. Like a glowstick.
".. He's chuuni."
"Then why Sun Wukong? Are you a fanboy?"
Personally offended at this, Kim Dokja shook his own light stick. It radiated an independent orange, showing strength even just as a color.
"Takes one to know one."
"Shut up, or I'll confiscate your ticket."
It took some time before the two of them made it to their seats. Just as Han Sooyoung said, they were very much front row. You could see TWSA perfectly from here, and at a distance, they could even see you. Kim Dokja didn't waste time before plopping down and immediately running through his pockets to fish out his phone.
Photos, he needed to take photos first. It wasn't like he had anyone to show it to besides Han Sooyoung who was already here, but it was for a memoir. Maybe he'd get it printed and framed, to recall the time he went to TWSA's concert.
Han Sooyoung murmured something rude beside him ("The stadium isn't going to disappear if you don't take a million photos.."), but Kim Dokja knew it was empty. When the number of photos in his gallery seemed acceptable, he shut his phone off.
Now, he let the atmosphere of the place really sink in. When he first entered, sure, he noticed how it looked like. But now that he was really sitting down, taking in the whole scenario he was in, it really hit him.
The air was thick, not like the stuffiness of a full subway train, but rather the feel of being underwater, where you couldn't breathe, or else you felt like you missed a moment where something could dash past you, without being able to chase after it.
If Kim Dokja took in as much air as he could, the faint waft of expensive perfume and polyester brushed his nose. It should have smelt cheap, but for some reason, a feeling of nostalgia held in the air. He hasn't even been here before, if countless daydreams didn't count.
He exhaled slowly, the air leaving his mouth. But there was still, one thing, right in front of him, he hadn't focused on yet.
The stage.
The stage where TWSA would be, singing and playing, right in front of his eyes without a screen to separate them.
A radiant white light beamed onto it; everything else was a deep black besides the stage. It was like it was the only thing in the world, yelling out the words, 'Look at me!' And so Kim Dokja did. He looked, stared, and didn't bother with anything else.
"...."
Seconds flew by fast, by the minute, everything grew more paced and relaxed. The crowd toned down, and chatter became muted. The air of the place was like a thin veil, stopping the outside from penetrating. It was just them, in their own world.
And at that, the curtains flew open, and the muffled conversations dropped to nothing.
All the eyes in the crowd focused on only one point.
The stage, and the strong white light beaming onto it.
"Hello, Korea!"
Kim Dokja knew that voice.
The person that emerged from the darkness was a woman with magnificent blonde hair shining in the light, glistening like the ocean. Two half braids tied together with a bow behind her head.
She wore a ruffle-sleeved black dress with a cut at her shoulder, exposing her collarbones just subtly covered by a choker that tied into another bow. There was a short slit just at the bottom, hoisting golden embroidery that draped to the floor.
She took the few steps forward, and you could hear her heels clacking in the silence.
The first person to emerge was Uriel.
Sounds exploded. Cheers, chanting, and just blatant yelling could be differentiated, too. Including Han Sooyoung and Kim Dokja, both screaming as loud as they could.
Then, a shorter figure hit the light.
Silence fell again.
"Whoa, this place is big."
You first would see the black on his head; dark to the point it looked purple. Everyone's attention zeroed in on him. Sure, he wasn't exactly Kim Dokja's top favorite, but he couldn't lie. ABFD looked really cool right now.
He sported the most chuuni dressing possible, a black hoodie pulled up at the sleeves with bandages wrapped around his skinny forearms, and black jeans with rips at the knees, too big for him, that they had tears at the heels.
You could tell from the eruption of the crowd that most of his fans were teenage girls and boys. Kim Dokja made a little less sound for him, but Han Sooyoung was completely different.
"Look! Kim Dokja! He's there!" Sooyoung aggressively shook his shoulder, the other hand with a purple light stick in the air.
"I see, I see!"
But Kim Dokja was still waiting, anticipation building up in his knee, bouncing rapidly, for the last member.
And for the last time in that concert, quiet took place. No- not quiet, but still. It stood still. Suspended in the air, waiting to burst.
He was sitting at the very edge of his chair, his fingers intertwined with each other, squeezing as tightly as possible. Come on, come on!
When Sun Wukong stepped up, he didn't say anything.
Nobody said anything.
But when the loud clack of his shoes echoed across the entire stadium, the man knew everyone was looking at him.
Yet, he looked so relaxed, so.. effortlessly cool.
A long, golden-brown tinted guitar strapped over his shoulder. It was jagged-sharp, it's fretboard stretching long when he held it; like a pole, a weapon being used as an instrument.
Matching with it, his hair was a blonde, neat but loose in a way that made it seem like he didn't bother and still looked effortlessly good. The kind of look that fans would die for.
Kim Dokja was too busy admiring his face before he looked at what he wore; a brown leather jacket that cropped at his waist, the color playing in with yellow perfectly. Pants that rolled up just at his shoes, but still not enough to show his ankles. Like his outfit was precisely chosen to be pin point in every aspect, but still seem nonetheless like second nature-
"Dude, you're staring."
"...I'm thinking."
"Of what? How hot and sexy he is?
"...No."
Everything roared with noise before Kim Dokja could register it, and he put his orange light stick high up in the air.
Yoo Joonghyuk insisted that he didn't need to be here.
And his point was only proven when the only seat available for him was one among the audience.
"Joonghyuk-ssi, you need to come!" Two hands gripped on his shoulders, shaking them roughly.
"I can just watch online."
The blonde in front of him crosses her arms in protest, giving him a look of betrayal that didn't change his mind at all.
"Please?"
"No."
"But you're joining! You need to watch!!"
Uriel was quite insistent that before he joined TWSA, he'd watch their concert at least once. To counter, he said as long as they tour in Korea as a complete joke, but when they actually did...
"I really don't need to."
"Yeah, he doesn't need to."
A boy sitting at the other side of the room yelled to them, his attention still occupied with the phone in his hand.
"Don't say that, ABFD!" She shot back in his direction, crossing her arms over.
"I mean, the internet's just there."
"He's not watching it online!"
"Then he won't watch!" ABFD sprung to his feet, pacing in their direction while shoving the phone in his pocket
A slight twinge of guilt hit Joonghyuk when he saw the disappointed expression on Uriel's face. She's the one who'd gotten him this opportunity, and he wasn't even able to reciprocate the favor.
"So? Out with it."
Uriel bit the inside of her lip whilst glancing between the two.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn't want to overthink it.
".. I'll go."
"Really?! Yes!"
The purple haired boy let out a loud sigh before turning on his heel, a barely noticeable curve on his lips.
The pair of fans were about 12 songs in the show, just where the concert is at it's height.
His throat stung from screaming lyrics, arms hurting from waving his light stick in the air, and ears rang every time the bass hit hard enough to shake the seats beneath him, and still, if someone offered him 10 more hours of this, Kim Dokja would've sold his soul on the spot. And all of this, with his best friend.
Besides him, Han Sooyoung had somehow disappeared twenty minutes ago before saying, "Oh, this is my favorite!" She yelled, from over her shoulder as the beat changed.
"I know!" He exclaimed back, nodding his head once, but eyes remaining locked onto the stage prevented him from looking.
Actually, disappeared was a generous way to put it.
She'd spotted something around three rows back, gasped dramatically, vaulted over two seats, and never returned. Kim Dokja briefly saw her with another figure screaming and hugging together, but chose not to investigate.
That left him alone in the front row.
Alone, but not lonely,
Because TWSA stood right there.
Out of nowhere, the lights dimmed.
A hush rolled across the stadium like a wave, tens of thousands of people lowered their light sticks, washing a darkness over the crowd that softened into a galaxy of gold, purple, orange and blue.
And just in front, Uriel smiled into the microphone.
"Korea," she said, voice warm and bright, "this is our last song tonight."
The scream that came back nearly killed him.
He shuffled closer to the edge of his seat. Really? Last song already?
No, this wasn't fair.
He had only just gotten here—time should freeze and slow down for things like these; important, miraculous things.
ABFD tapped his sticks together four times.
Sun Wukong adjusted his grip on the guitar.
The first chord rang out, and Kim Dokja felt it reverberate throughout his body.
It was one of their oldest songs,
The song.
The same one he used to play quietly through cheap earphones, studying till dawn. The same melody that filled the bus ride home, and made lonely convenience-store dinners feel cinematic. It made his ordinary life, feel survivable.
His mouth opened by instinct, singing every lyric with the crowd.
He'd always had a talent for singing, but he probably sounded terrible now. He couldn't care though.
Because, how unbelievably ridiculous that a person could be wanting something for years, then suddenly be standing inside it. He'd imagined this exact scenario so many times,
The lights,
The crowd.
The stage.
The impossible joy of being one insignificant face among thousands, yet all loving the same thing at once. It formed some messed up sort of comradeship he couldn't put into words.
He wondered how it was like for everyone else, and laughed breathlessly to himself.
Always wanting to do something like this, come to a large concert, escape everything for just a short, short while, felt like a breath of fresh air from his life— As if he'd just popped out of water. Slowly, the chorus swelled, and everyone jumped.
Just to live carefree, even its for an hour, a minute, or a second. To just loose that tight grip he had on himself.
His fingers coiled over his orange light stick like it was sacred.
So, even if he died tomorrow, he'd still be satisfied, as long as he did something by his own accord.
Then, after a beat—
'No, actually, I wouldn't.'
He laughed again, half-mad with happiness.
'I'd regret not kissing someone first.'
He turned his head, praying that there was someone besides him, and there was.
Tall. Broad shoulders, and a black coat. Sharp profile lit silver-blue by the stage lights, and Kim Dokja hadn't noticed him the whole concert.
Which, well, was strange, because he was difficult not to notice.
The stranger glanced at him once, unimpressed.
Kim Dokja, running entirely on adrenaline, sleep deprivation, and years of repressed poor decision-making, thought:
'Sure.'
Then leaned over and kissed him.
It lasted exactly one second— two, if generous.
His lips were warm—but he heard only silence in his own head.
Then—
The stadium exploded, and Kim Dokja jerked back so fast he nearly fell over.
His eyes darted all over the stadium; did he miss something? No way, out of all the seconds he wasn't looking at the stage..!
But the answer was just above his head, on the giant screen above the stage had changed.
And there they were.
Almost thirty feet tall in the air,
Kim Dokja kissing a total stranger.
A bright pink heart frame surrounded them.
KISS CAM.
"Oh," Kim Dokja said.
Then louder.
"Oh."
Then, with growing horror,
"OH."
And the audience screamed like the apocalyspe begun.
People were standing on chaire, someone threw a shoe.
Han Sooyoung—he was guessing,— from somewhere behind him, shrieked so loudly it pierced through several layers of human noise.
"YOU INSANE BASTARD!"
Kim Dokja whipped toward the man beside him, rushing, "I am so sorry," he blurted. "I don't know what happened, I had a moment, emotionally, spiritually, chemically—"
The stranger was staring at him like he had personally caused war.
Now that he looked at him... Kim Dokja froze.
He was handsome. Devastatingly handsome, at that. It was the kind of look that made him want to apologise just by being in his presence.
Before Kim Dokja could continue his episode, the stage lights cut out, and darkness washed over everything.
Then, one spotlight snapped on, the one right above center stage.
Uriel stood there, trembling in place.
ABFD doubled over, laughing behind his drums.
Sun Wukong had one hand over his face.
She raised the microphone.
"Well," She said, voice shaking, "I guess this is the perfect time."
And another spotlight beamed downward, directly onto the man beside Kim Dokja.
The crowd went feral.
Uriel screamed into the mic—
"Everyone, please welcome the fourth member of TWSA!"
Kim Dokja's soul left his body.
The stranger slowly, very slowly stood, his eyes still on Dokja.
No.
No, no no no no.
He stepped toward the aisle as the audience thundered around them. Then, climbed the stage, in utter silence— from humiliation or anger, no one was too sure. Han Sooyoung was still yelling behind him, guards restraining her arms.
Uriel was crying. Actually crying.
"We did it!" she sobbed into AFBD's shoulder.
AFBD was on the floor.
Sun Wukong pointed directly at Kim Dokja and laughed so hard he had to crouch down.
Blue lights ignited across the entire stadium.
Blue.
So that's what blue meant.