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Kaminari sat in front of the mirror hair tied back. It was growing to long he'd have to cut it soon. He applied their favourite mascara. His lashes curled upwards. They felt like a doll. Beautiful and feminine.
He finished his makeup swiftly prepared for their date with kirishima and bakugo. It was their first date they wanted to look nice.
Kirishima and Bakugo has started dating during their second year but had quickly realised they both also had feelings for kaminari. Kaminari had pushed away their friends due to catching feelings, worried they'd ruin his friends relationship.
Last week he'd been hidden in their room. He'd been avoiding Kirishima and bakugo for about a month now.
Bakugo barged into his room shouting about how they'd been avoiding them. He demanded answers. Kirishima followed closely behind him apologise for his boyfriends aggressive behaviour. Kaminari broke down crying, explaining their reasoning for avoiding them. Bakugo and kirishima laughed. They laughed. Turns out they all liked eachover.
Today they were going to a cafe. Bakugo had picked it because he knew Kirishima and Kaminari loved the boba there.
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The date had been great. They'd just talked. Talked about everything, they talked about school and pro heros and everything else. It was nice.
They had another date to day. Kaminari had chosen this one. Their going to the aquarium. He knew Kirishima loved sharks and bakugo would enjoy the peaceful atmosphere.
He was so excited for the date and the first one had be amazing. He hummed happily as they applied their makeup. Applying their favourite mascara. Kaminari liked mascara he liked the way it made his eyelashes stand out. He liked combing feminine makeup and masculine clothes. It made him feel androgynous. They liked that.
That's when the beast spoke.
"Your makeup makes you look to feminine everyone's going to think your a girl."
Kaminari shoke his head. No just because they were wearing makeup it didn't make them any less nonbinary. Didn't it?
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The date was nice Kirishima had loved seeing all the fish. He'd rambled on and on about the sharks. It was adorable especially when he did the cutest little happy stim. Kaminari loved seeing kirishima so happy. Bakugo had enjoyed the quiet. He hadn't spoken much but he seemed entranced by the soft blue colours and movement of the fish especially the jellyfish.
The date was nice everyone had a nice time except Kaminari. It wasn't as if he hadn't loved being around Kiri and Bakugo. But the beast had awoken again. Its harsh words surrounding him.
"Your boyfriends only like you because they see you as a boy."
"Your not really nonbinary if you like looking feminine."
"Faker."
"Attention seeker."
"Imposter."
No he shouldn't let this control his life. They weren't any less nonbinary because they wore makeup or because they dressed a certain way. They were nonbinary. So why did they still feel like an imposter?
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Today they were going on a date to the arcade. Kirishima had chosen it. Kaminari loved the arcade it was his favourite place. He loved all the colours, all the sounds and all the games.
He'd reached for the new mascara Jirou had given him but before he'd even applied it the beast spoke again.
"Jirou only gave you that because she sees you as girl"
No jirou did this because she's your friend. She did this because she's a good person.
"Liar"
No he's still nonbinary even when wearing makeup.
"Faker"
"Attention seeker"
"Imposter"
"Faker"
"Faker"
"Faker"
'FAKER!!!"
Kaminari put the mascara down deciding he'd wear it another day. Not today. Not when the beast was so loud.
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The date had been okay. It should have been amazing kaminari loved the arcade but the beast had been hard to ignore. Its words rang in his head.
"They only like you because they see you as a boy"
"Stop pretending"
"Attention seeker"
"Faker"
"Imposter"
He felt like they were gonna throw up. The reflection that stode in the mirror didn't look like him. His hair has grown to long. His face to feminine yet to masculine. He felt sick.
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He'd skipped today's date. He hadn't meant to. They knew their boyfriends would be worried but the face in the mirror hadn't looked like his own and his body had looked strange. The person standing before him didn't look like him. The beast screamed at him, clawing at his skin and slowly consuming him.
"The class 2A girls on like you because they see you as a girl"
"Your boyfriends don't believe you they think your a boy"
"You can't be nonbinary if you like makeup"
"Girl"
"Boy"
"Girl"
"Boy"
"Faker"
"Attention seeker"
"Imposter"
"Faker"
"Faker"
"Faker"
"FAKER!!"
"Hey Kami you okay?"
He looked up only to see Kirishima and Bakugo before him. Kirishima looked worried really worried. Bakugo looked concerned well as concerned as Bakugo could look. Kaminari rubbed his eyes, he hadn't noticed they'd been crying.
" Yeah I'm fine, just having some trouble getting ready that's all" He smiled. It was a small smile, a fake smile but it was a smile none the less.
"Cut the crap dunce face, you didn't show up to our date, you didn't reply to our texts and then we find you curled up in your bed in the dark crying. What the hell is actually going on!"
"What Bakugo means is Kami were worried about you, you've been really off the past week and we wanna know what's going on"
Kirishima looked at him like he was a wounded puppy. He looked so worried. It made Kaminari want to tell them everything, to just be honest but they were scared. He didn't want them to walk on egg shells around him just because he's having a bad day. He started to cry again.
Two pairs of arms wrapped around him. His boyfriends had pulled him into a hug. He could feel Kiri rubbing small circles on his back and Bakugo had a fist full of his shirt. He should just tell them. They just tell about the beast and how it eats away him and how they feel fake like an imposter. Their trying to live up to these impossible standards of what nonbinary should look like.
"Do you see me as a boy?" He asks quietly.
"What? No off course not"
"What the hell Sparky! Why the fuck would we think that!"
They both say it at the same time. They reacted so quickly. It makes him feel warm, loved. They don't see him as a boy. He was wrong.
Kirishima is the first to pull away from the hug. He grabs one Kaminari's hands. Bakugo pulls away and holds his other hand.
"Kami, why would you think we see you as a boy, you've told us your nonbinary?" Asks Kirishima gently. "Yeah why the fuck would we think your anything over that nonbinary?" Bakugo was not as gentle, almost annoyed Kaminari had even suggested anything.
" It's just I've had really bad gender dysphoria recently and I got in my head a little, that's all really."
Kirishima and Bakugo looked at eachover for a second sharing a look of disbelief before turning their attention back to Kaminari. Kirishima planted a small kiss on his hand and Bakugo rubbed circles on the back of their hand. They stayed like this for a second before Bakugo spoke.
"Oi sparkplug if your ever feeling like this again you can tell us alright were your boyfriends and we wanna help. Get that in your tiny brain!"
Kaminari pressed a small kiss each of their cheeks and thanked them but asked to be alone for a bit. He said they'd come find them again a bit.
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Today Kaminari had another date with their boyfriends today. He reached for his mascara and applying it gently to his eyelashes. They were excited. They were going to the arcade. He loved the arcade. The beast wasn't silent but he had chosen to ignore it. He likes his mascara and he knows he has people who love them for who they are. They know everything will be okay.