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Sixteen- and seventeen-year-old Steve and Bucky sat in a blanket fort, just talking.
“Are you going to be in the army one day?” Steve avoided Bucky’s eyes, picking at his cuticles like he did whenever he got nervous.
Bucky knew Steve couldn’t imagine a life without him in it. “Maybe. I don’t want to leave you, though.” I don’t want to leave you. Ever.
“I don’t want you to leave me, either.” Steve looked up at him and smiled.
“They might let you in if you try hard enough. Bulk up.”
Steve chuckled. “Lord knows that’ll never happen. I can barely put on any weight. I’d never even get a chance anyway, ‘cause of my asthma.”
“If you don’t enlist, I won’t, either.”
“Yeah, you would. You’d get a sweet girlfriend, nice friends, and leave poor Stevie here, all alone.” He pouted.
Steve had admitted it before, he was terrified of the thought that Bucky would leave him. Honestly, the thought scared Bucky too.
“I’ll never get a girlfriend.”
Steve blinked. “Are you kidding me?! You’re one of the prettiest people I know! Any girl would be lucky to have you!”
A moment passed in silence.
“D’you mean that?” Bucky’s voice was small with the words, thoughts he’d suppressed crawling back up his neck. The only girl I would ever want is you. If you were a girl. I’ll never get a girlfriend, because I only love you. (yes ik thats cringe but remember those are thoughts he SUPPRESSED)
“OF COURSE!!” Steve was incredulous, eyes widening and jaw dropping a little bit. Don’t look at his mouth.
All of a sudden, Steve lunged forward and tackled Bucky. He tickled Bucky’s side, leaving him defenseless and crying with laughter. Bucky shoved Steve back, poking him in the side and flopping on top of him. Steve was crushed, air pulled out of his lungs.
“WAIT, wait, wait,” he wheezed, attempting to push Bucky off.
“Get off, I mean it!”
Bucky pulled himself back up, and Steve reached for his inhaler, breathing in the air and holding his breath. Bucky leaned back on the heels of his hands, letting himself calm down from the adrenaline rush.
After a moment, Steve came back and hurled himself right back on top of Bucky, both of them writhing on the ground. Steve immediately went for his ribs again. He snorted and pushed at Steve, but he just slammed Bucky back down against the floor.
“Get offa me!” Bucky practically squealed, grabbing Steve’s hands and sitting back up. He released them.
“Why’d you do that?”
Steve smirked cheekily. “Do what?”
“Tackle me.”
“Felt right.” He shrugged.
*an hour later*
“Did you finish the essay we needed to write?” Bucky asked.
“What essay?”
He sat up and stared Steve down.
“The one due tomorrow? Three pages long?”
Steve stared at Bucky, shocked. It looked like the air was pulled out of his lungs. “Shit, no I didn’t.”
“We started it a week ago, and have been working on it every day in class! How do you not have it done?”
“I just pretend to have an asthma attack every day. I HATE English.”
“Every day? How do they not find that suspicious?”
“The teachers are dumb. Besides, it’s illegal to refuse to help a student with a medical issue.” Steve shrugged, an indifferent look on his face.
“Lucky.”
“I know I am.”
Steve continued on another subject—probably that old movie they went and saw last week with the hot guy—but Bucky barely heard him anymore.
From Bucky’s spot, leaning on his elbow next to Steve on the ground, the younger boy’s blue eyes shone in the sunlight filtering through the thin blankets set up around them. His hair was messed up from their antics earlier, face flushed with the stale heat trapped in the fort.
The fort suddenly felt too warm. Steve was close enough that Bucky could see every freckle across his nose.
It was like Bucky’s body acted on instinct. He leaned down—quickly—and pressed his lips to Steve’s. Steve flinched at the touch.
That jolted Bucky back to his senses. (BUCKYWHATTHEFUCKAREYOUDOING) He pulled back, startled himself at what he’d done.
“I-uh-was that okay..?” He swallowed.
Steve’s eyes were wide, lips slightly swollen. After a moment, he nodded. “Yeah.”
“Are you mad?”
Steve shook his head. “..no?”
Their faces were still close, breathing in each other’s presence. Steve tilted his chin forward, bringing their lips back together at a slow, gentle pace.
They stayed there for a moment, and Bucky shakily cupped Steve’s face with his free arm. Steve reached up and tangled his fingers in Bucky’s hair, causing the older boy to suck in a quivering breath.
This is wrong. Being like—like this is wrong!
But nothing had ever felt so right.