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My Folded Crane

Summary:

‘Dear Leow0ok.’

Those were the first words Leo read on the old, crumpled letter he’d found buried inside a chest in the ruined BAT base. He recognized the handwriting immediately. From the oddly flat Ds to the crooked square Os, it was unmistakably Nufuli’s. Leo stared at the paper for a moment longer.

Nufuli had written this for him. But Leo had no idea when, or why.

Notes:

i recommend the song metamorphosis by your arms are my cocoon for this :)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

‘Dear Leow0ok.’

Those were the first words Leo read on the old, crumpled letter he’d found buried inside a chest in the ruined BAT base. He recognized the handwriting immediately. From the oddly flat Ds to the crooked square Os, it was unmistakably Nufuli’s. Leo stared at the paper for a moment longer.

Nufuli had written this for him. But Leo had no idea when, or why.

His bloodied fingers gripped the worn edges of the yellow tinted page, his eyes had already started to burn.

Dear Leow0ok.

I folded this letter into a crane the way you once taught me to. I remember you saying you liked cranes because they symbolized happiness, longevity, and something about hope. I am not too sure anymore. As I write this, it is late at night.

Sneaking out without waking Derapchu up was difficult, you know? Especially without setting off those blaring alarms you activate every night for security.

I admire you. I truly do. You have probably heard those words leave my mouth hundreds or no, thousands, of times by now, and I hope you never grow tired of hearing them. You lead BAT with such authority and confidence, speaking without hesitation, never once showing weakness or exhaustion. Sometimes, I am envious of that part of you.

At times, I feel as though I am simply not worthy enough to stand beside you.

Truth is, this feels like the final and last letter I will ever write to you. Something deep in my instincts tells me that one day, sooner or later, one terrible thing is going to happen, and it will change all of us forever. Me, you, Jumper, and Derapchu.

Two nights after writing this letter, I will be leaving BAT. I have been considering it for a long while now, longer than you probably realize. Something has been rubbing me the wrong way, like an itch beneath my skin and flesh that refuses to disappear. I want to find out who I truly am. I want to shine independently, without constantly relying on someone else to guide me like a child.

Do not beat yourself up for this, Leo. You do not need to carry every burden on your shoulders just to prove you are a leader. You do not need to throw yourself headfirst into danger just to protect the people you love. You do not need to act like you are never tired.

Do not pretend you have not spent nights awake, eyes glassy while your fingers tangled into your hair, desperately trying to figure out how to make everything right, only to act perfectly fine again the next morning. You do not deserve to bear everything alone. You already carry responsibilities far heavier than anyone should have to endure by themselves.

My white leopard, you are unbelievably the strongest person I have ever met, both mentally and physically. No matter how many times failure has been forced upon you, no matter how many battles you ran from that left you on the brink of death, you always come back. Always.

On cold and restless nights, climb up to the roof of BAT. Snuggle yourself in the jacket I purposely leave behind for you, close your eyes, and tilt your head upwards towards the sky. Look at the stars and remember where my finger once pointed, the touching stars Parrot showed me, the only ones known in the universe.

Hold the spyglass I crafted and left beside this folded letter, and adjust the dial to look at those two stars up close. Pretend another body is laying beside you, stargazing at your side. Pretend I am still there, rambling about every fact I know about the stars.

It is ironic how vast the universe is, how countless stars and worlds exist beyond our reach and knowledge, and yet somehow, we still found each other. You guided me into becoming my own shining star, and I do not think any amount of netherite or diamonds I send you could ever repay that kindness back.

I know these words will not make my departure hurt any less, but I can only hope they ease the feelings left unsaid between us. If this truly becomes my final letter, then fold it back into a crane the same way, leave it on your table, and continue on with your day. Keep your head high and lead BAT the way you always have, with that sharp and patient kindness in your tone and voice. Even if I am no longer there physically, know that I will always remain beside you.

And if one day I am no longer on this server at all, then I ask one thing from you. Live. Live for me. Because it would hurt far more to watch you give up than it ever would to know you grieved. I know that even in a mourning state, you will still find a reason to stand back up on your feet and move forward. Or at least, I hope you will.

When I am gone, please be more mindful of where you place your minecarts. I fear I will no longer be there to reach you quickly enough whenever you get hurt, to hold your cold hand while hurriedly cutting enchanted golden apples into small pieces just to feed them to you.

I fear there will be no one left who truly sees the person behind your mask. And I fear that, little by little, you will let yourself rot alone inside the back of your own mind without anyone to pull you back up.

Leo, My dearest Leo.

Thank you for guiding me all the way to this point.

Far away from all the chaos of the server, I will build us a small yet lively house. I will make a quiet farm beside it, a sugarcane farm so I can fold all the cranes you want, and then I will wait. I will wait for the day you come visit me again, waving with that bright smile of yours as though no time has passed at all.

 

Yours and always, Nufuli.

Notes:

i would like to think leo has this letter inside his pocket at all times
goldfisj duo is so bittersweeticant

if you read a few other goldfish duo fics, you might see one or two things inspired from them..
someone make a leo letter to this righ now