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Klao and Phop are sitting in Phop's bed holding each other. The last months has been challenging. Fighting for their love, finally they can show it out loud.
"P'Phop," Klao called out looking at him with those big eyes.
"Hmm?" Phop said as he looked down to his beloved.
"What would you do if I disappeared?"
"Why do you ask that?"
"Just answer me, hmm?" Klao said as he got out of Phop's embrace and sat steadily looking Phop straight in the eye.
"Well, I would look for you of course. I would not bear to live if you were gone and not by my side."
"If I never come back?"
"No, I shall wait."
"No, P'Phop. Promise me, if I ever disappear. Promise you'll live happily, hmm? Promise me that you'll marry a proper Lady and have kids. You are to live happily even if I am not here."
"Klao, I thought we already had this discussion?"
"Just, promise me."
"No. I won't live with anyone other than you."
"P'Phop!"
"Okay, I promise."
"Good." Klao said as he got back to cuddling with Phop. And Phop knew the promise shall never happen. He won't ever let Klao out of his sight. And he shall not marry another except for Klao.
"Oh, my parents are asking when the wedding shall happen? When do you want it to be, Klao?"
"Hmm, do you want it to happen fast?"
"I'm asking you."
"Well, 2 weeks."
"Huh? In 2 weeks? Aren't you moving on too fast, Klao?"
"Well, what if another lady snatches you up?"
"And earlier you told me to marry a lady." Phop says scoldingly—teasing—as he rubs his nose with Klao's.
"Well, that's if I disappear." Klao retorted, hitting Phop softly.
"Then never disappear, hmm?" Phop tells his beloved looking him in the eye.
"Only time will tell."
The past week and a half has been super busy, wedding preparations and stuff.
Only a few days then Klao and I would be wed.
"P'Phop!" Klao calls out the came running to his soon-to-be husband.
"Hmm?"
"Kong and Sai is asking for you."
"Oh, okay. How is everything doing, Klao?" Phop asked Klao as he holds him tight, looking him in the eyes.
"It's all good krub!"
Phop chuckles at his love's krub krub. So cute. "Mm, you're so cute."
"P'Phop stop it!"
"Why? We are to be wed, are you still shy, Klao?"
"I-" Klao mumbles as he looks down, flustered. "Kong and Sai is looking for you. Go fastt!"
"Okay krub."
"Klaoo."
"Hmm?"
"Let's go to sleep." Phop says as he opens his arms out for Klao.
"Later, I'm busy."
"Aou, can I cuddle you then?" That made Klao chuckle.
"Ok fine, let's sleep."
"Yess."
They settled in Phop's bed holding each other.
"We're getting married, P'Phop."
"We are."
"No woman will look at you now." Klao said in a sulking tone.
"Only you."
"Better be."
"Klao."
"Krub?"
"Promise me you'll only marry me."
"I promisee."
"Not just in this life."
"I promise krub!"
"Okay, good night Klao." Phop said as he places his face in Klao's hair.
"Good night, P'Phop." Klao answered as he nuzzles his face in Phop's neck.
The sun is up, it hit Phop's eyes. Painfully. Unfortunately he didn't find Klao next to him, weird. He always woke up before him. He stretches his body and gets out, off to look for his Klao. Only 2 days left and they will be wed. Finally. And Phop couldn't help but smile at the thought.
"Oh, Lord Phop. You're finally awake. Can you tell Master Klao that your parents are looking for him?" Chuay says.
"Hmm?" Phop answers curiously. "He wasn't in the bed when I woke up, I thought he got out to venture some place?"
"Huh? Kong and I was just outside of your room, one awake after the other. Master Klao didn't leave the room."
"Huh? What do you mean?" The smile on Phop's face faltered. Where was Klao? Phop couldn't help but think back to 2 weeks ago. When Klao asked him what he would do if ever he disappeared. No, Klao couldn't possibly have left him, right? Not 2 days before their wedding. Not when they were just holding each other tightly the night before.
"Tell everyone to look for Klao. Not just in the manor but the whole town. Now!" Phop screamed his order.
Phop's day started with a smile. Now it's ending and he couldn't bear live. No. Klao. Where has he gone? He was lively last night. And I didn't feel him getting out of my embrace. What happened? No, Klao will come back. He will come back to me. I shall slip this ring unto his finger.
The manor that was lively in the morning, preparing for a wedding. Now in distress, in search of Klao.
These thoughts consumed Phop as he held the ring in his hands dearly. He has not eaten the whole day, not come out of his room after telling chuay and others to look for Klao. He cannot bear to accept He was gone. No.
Klao will come back. He always will. He always will.
"Phop." His mom's voice called out.
"Come in." Phop said in a defeated voice. The glimmer in his eyes nowhere to be found. Just a day before, the two were holding each other so dearly. Now, where has Klao gone to?
"Are you okay, son?"
"Ma.. He told me before that he was bound to leave. He was never supposed to be here. He made me promise to marry a lady if ever he disappears. And I-I promised him. I never thought he would leave, Ma. I can't live without him." Phop let out as tears leaves his eyes.
"Phop, a body has been found in the river." His mother said, tears coming out of her eyes, too.
Silence.
"What?" Phop looks into his mother's eyes hoping what he's hearing is all a lie. No. It's all a lie.
"The body, is most probably Klao, dear."
"Where is it? Where's the body?" Phop croaks out.
"No, Phop. I don't advise that you see it-"
"Take me there ma! Please." Phop cries out, begging to see his Klao. If it was his Klao.
"Okay."
The way to the river was unbearably long. If it was Klao, I don't know how I could ever live.
I looked up in the sky and saw the stars—how beautiful. Oh how Klao would've loved them. He fidgets the ring in his hand. Klao's ring. It was supposed to be his.
They were supposed to be getting married. No, they were gonna get married. Klao is alive. My Klao is alive. He's alive. He will come back. He will come back to me, and I shall wait. I shall wait until he does. Until he comes back to my embrace. I shall not marry. For when he comes back, I shall marry him. And I will marry him, I will.
These thoughts are eating up Phop slowly. He has cried out all of his tears, he doesn't know how to live. He has lost Klao once and he came back. Klao will come back. He promised. Klao promised him, they will get married. They will.
"Phop." His Father calls out.
"Hmm?" Phop answers in a defeated tone. Not having the energy to look his father in the eye.
"We're here."
"Hm." He answers. Not ready.
They walked close to the body, it was sacked. Full of blood, red.
As he walks closer to the body, the stench hitting him hard. He walks closer, close enough to see the face.
Klao.
No. No. No.
He looked closer, it was Klao. His face, him. His Klao.
Again, tears started streaming out of Phop's eyes. Klao has promised him that they will get married. They will get married. Why is he here? Why is he dead?
"M-ma, get him a blanket. He-he's so cold, ma. He must be freezing." Phop says as he embraces Klao's dead body, not minding the stench. He cups Klao's face, his Klao's face. "Y- Why are you so cold Klao? Hmm? Was my embrace not enough? Why? Are you cold? I'm here, P'Phop's here. You won't feel cold anymore, Klao. I'm here, hmm? Phi is here. We're getting married in 2 days, remember? Phi will hug you. I'm here."
Phop couldn't stop the tears from coming out. He holds Klao all over. Why was he so cold? He holds Klao's left hand and slips the ring in. He fulfilled his promise. But why isn't Klao moving? Why isn't Klao moving?
"Klao." Phop croaks out still holding his sacked beloved. "Stop being so cold, hmm?" He says as he kissed Klao's left hand where the ring stays.
"Phop," his mom says, voice stuttering. "They need to take his body, let's go home, son. Meet him when he's getting buried." His mom says, both her hands covering her mouth to keep her voice from stuttering due to crying.
That statement made Phop look at his mother. "No," he started, shaking his face, "I won't leave his side, he will feel lonely, he might have nightmares again. He will feel cold and," hiccup, "and alone."
"Phop."
"No, no, no."
Phop stayed there, beside Klao's rotten body. Holding the deceased, letting out tears until no more could get out.
Then
Chuay and Kong held Phop all of a sudden, "Hmm? What?" Phop let out. "We're sorry Lord Phop, this was an order." Chuay says. Then Klao's body started getting dragged by other servants. Away, and away from Phop.
"No!! NO, KLAO, STOP!!" He screamed trying to get out of Chuay and Kong's arms but he couldn't. He was far too weak. All he could do was stretch out his left arm holding out to Klao, knowing he wasn't even alive to look back.
———————
2 days later
Klao's funeral (supposedly PhopKlao's wedding)
The past 2 days Phop never came out of Klao's room. Barely eaten, he could die at this rate. Even with his parents banging on his door, begging him to eat, he wouldn't.
He stayed there, in Klao's bed, imagining Klao was still there.
If he doesn't acknowledge it real, hopefully it will never be real, right? It's all a lie. All a lie. Klao was just playing a game. We're getting married, we're gonna get married. He's getting ready right now, for our wedding.
Our wedding.
"Phop," his mother says as he knocks on Klao's door. "You need to get ready, everyone is waiting for you."
"Should I come in?" She asks when no answer came.
"Hmm."
She pushed the door open and found her son laying in his beloved's bed, holding the covers, pillow, everything that had a scent of Klao. "Oh, my baby." She mumbled as she felt tears forming in her eyes.
"Ma." Phop says as he sat in Klao's bed looking at his fingers, "I'm dreaming right?" He asked as he looked at his mom, eyes full of tears.
"Oh my Phop." She said as she looked away from her son, understanding his feelings.
"He will come back right ma?"
His mom can only slip a ring unto Phop's fingers, Klao's ring.
"Keep it safe. He would want you to." She said holding her son's hand with the ring in between.
That action made more tears fall out of Phop's disassociated face. As if he were used to it.
As his mom's hand let go of his, he held the ring tightly. Never letting it go.
How we wished he had held Klao.
So he never got away.
He promised.
They will marry.
For eternity.
If they had chose to get married just a few days earlier, Klao would still be here, right?.
Hmm?
If there was another life. I hope to meet you again, Klao, let's get married then. And I promise I won't let you go. Ever again. I will hold you tight, every night.
The funeral was taking place, everyone was waiting for Phop. And when he came he looked.. wrecked. People could only wish him to live well, for Klao.
But how could he? When the only person he wanted to live with for eternity is gone?
"Phop," His Father says, "bid Klao goodbye."
Phop walked in front of Klao's coffin, peeking at his deceased body. He took a long breath, to stop tears from coming out. He failed.
"Klao." He started tears finding they way out of his eyes, falling. So naturally, as it had been for the past 2 days. "Since our childhood we've been super close," he continued as he looked at Jom and Kaew, both their eyes were too, red. They cried. But not as much as Phop.
"I remember the day when we were playing hide and seek in the fields," he let out a chuckle, "I was worried, I couldn't find you anywhere. I screamed my throat out, screaming you name. Turns out you had just fallen asleep." He said remembering the memories.
"And when," breath "and when you went missing before, that, I almost went crazy, Klao. But you came back. Though very much different than you used to be. But what can I do? I very much also loved that version of you. The way you speak so weirdly, how you randomly knew how to speak the language of the Farang. Better than Thai, if you ask me." He chuckles at the memory of that one day at the tea house.
"Also during Songkran, normally it was just our people visiting me asking for blessing but you, you made my Songkran happier, Klao. Livelier. Though it was Pichit's way of celebrating Songkran, I'm glad you introduced us to it."
"And that- that one day when we had our first kiss. You would probably be embarrassed that I'm saying this here. But that day was the best day of my life. And one of the worsts. That day you told me to marry Lady Varna." sigh "And a few weeks ago. The night we decided what day to marry. It should have been today. You made me promise to marry a lady if ever you disappeared. I'm sorry Klao, that might," hick "that might be the promise I made to you that I won't fulfill."
"We promised each other lots of things. You still haven't taught me the Language of the Farang. We promised to marry. In this life and others." Phop said as he looked at the crowd. Familiar faces of those who knew Klao.
"If not in this life, Klao. In the next life. If there is. In the place where we can trust showcase our love without needing to prove it. You said there is such a place. So, can we?. Can we meet there? Again, fall in love and marry."
--
After Klao has died, Phop has only focused on his duties as an officer. Every week he visits Klao's grave and tells him about his week. He likes to think Klao has just went to Pichit for a long long visit.
Lady Varna and Phop has grew close, same as Pim. Living in the manor to get away from Cherd. Lady Varna got married to another man. Though it was 'unfortunate' their fathers say, that Phop should have married Varna for Klao wanted them too and he was no longer here. But Phop doesn't want to. He never will. Though it was one of Klao's wishes, he won't ever marry. Not in this life. And not another if not Klao.