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The first time Yamaguchi sees Bokuto cry it’s nothing like he expects it to be.
In all the years Yamaguchi has known Bokuto, even in the two years Yamaguchi’s been dating him, he never saw him cry. Yeah, Bokuto had his ups and downs, but never once had he broken like this. It was scary.
They’re sitting in a small family diner, Bokuto’s choice. The first hint that Yamaguchi got that gave him any indication that something was wrong was that Bokuto was already sitting in the diner when he arrived. Usually Bokuto waited outside for Yamaguchi to arrive, or was a few minutes late, but rarely did he go in before Yamaguchi even arrived.
The second indicator that something is wrong is the look in Bokuto’s eyes. He’s there but he’s not. He’s paying attention but his quips and grins don’t touch Yamaguchi the way they normally do. They’re lacking in that usual luster that only Bokuto could give. It’s off-putting.
He wants to ask about it but he knows he shouldn’t. He knows he could perpetually set the older man into a bad mood for the rest of the night if mentions anything, so he doesn’t.
And then it happens. Just as Yamaguchi opens his mouth to say something about how the ketchup on Bokuto’s plate looks like a duck punching the moon, it happens.
It’s quiet at first, the way Bokuto’s tears slip from his cheeks and sink into the table. Yamaguchi is shocked. His mouth open and closes like he’s a fish out of water. But then it’s loud and shaking and suddenly Bokuto is sobbing over his food, shoulders shaking and hunched so low he’s only two centimeters away from getting ketchup all over his face.
People are staring. Yamaguchi intimately knows what it’s like to have a crowd look at you. Even now it makes his skin flush. People probably think he did something to Bokuto. Broke up with him maybe. They probably thought he was horrible for letting Bokuto cry like that in a restaurant. It was embarrassing.
A deep, practiced breath in and out reminded Yamaguchi that other people’s eyes weren’t his current concern, but the crying man in front of him. Yamaguchi slaps some bills on the table and pulls Bokuto outside (it was harder than he thought it would be).
Bokuto is still sobbing, hunched in on himself and feverently wiping tears from his face like they were burning his skin. It breaks Yamaguchi’s heart.
There was something strange about Bokuto crying. It didn’t fit him. It made him look like another person with how his whole body shook. The tears reminded Yamaguchi of something he would see in a Ghibli movie.
He waits a few minutes for Bokuto to calm down a little, rubbing his back. The fact that something was so wrong that made Bokuto so upset was making Yamaguchi anxious. Bokuto sniffs a few times and Yamaguchi bites his lip.
“What’s wrong?”
Bokuto takes a shuddering breath and shakes his head. His eyes fill with tears again. It was something serious, Yamaguchi decided.
“Is there anything I can do for you right now?”
“Hold me.”
So he does.