Chapter Text
The world was nothing but a ruin of walking corpses. The laboratory, which had kept piling up mountains of bodies through meaningless experiments, eventually blew up to pieces. By then, the origin of the mysterious virus was lost in time, and any hope of a vaccine had long been abandoned. Before anyone could even discover an immune survivor, they would have likely become just another cold corpse in the desperate struggle against humans searching for foods and shelters. The radio waves had gone silent ages ago. In short, it was humanity’s defeat.
Lu Guang survived, though he had never possessed any grand obsession with survival. By some stroke of luck, the corpses didn't detect him well. Whether it was a peculiar constitution or some talent manifested late in a world gone mad, he didn't know.
But for whatever reason, he had never lost sleep from being hunted by them. He wasn't particularly thrilled about it, though. He simply missed the past, back when he could stretch his legs out and sleep in a comfortable room.
Seldom death—or becoming whatever the creatures are called—seemed like a tempting choice. Most of the time he didn’t like the idea of pain.
To Lu Guang, the humans who clung frantically to life were far more dangerous than the walking dead. Two years had passed since the outbreak, but it was far too short and futile a time for magical human evolution.
Even as monsters possessing strength far beyond human capability roamed the earth, humans chose to continue their endless wars. For food, for a place to sleep—the reasons varied, though each was justified in its own right.
China was a massive landmass, and during a global emergency like this, the central government lacked the power to enforce laws upon the civilian population. Consequently, regions outside the big cities had no choice but to fend for themselves.
Beijing had been locked down immediately to contain the virus, but the other parts of the country were abandoned. In the blink of an eye, hell materialized on the continent. People chose to retreat underground or tried desperately to secure a boat to flee the Chinese mainland.
Several factions merged into a civilian organization to build emergency shelters and establish a systematic network for large groups to move together. However, humans rarely followed a leadership's commands in times of crisis unless backed by absolute authority.
Driven by a desperate desire to grasp at any straw, Lu Guang had once drifted across the country to stay in one of their shelters. But while he took a brief nap, the radio broadcasting the shelter's coordinates was stolen, crushing every hope. He searched the surrounding areas for another abandoned radio, but humans were more cruel than he had anticipated; every single radioes he found had been stepped on and broken beyond repair.
Arriving in another village after days of walking, he tried adjusting the frequency of a makeshift radio. Only faint static hummed through the receiver; the sound of a human voice vibrating through vocal cords was entirely absent. Lu Guang never touched a radio again after that.
Instead, he began wandering the vast continent, taking meticulous care to avoid encountering other people. It was a journey he started with a large map in hand, a red ink pen that required more than a firm press to write, a few cans of food scavenged from an abandoned factory, and some clothes stuffed in his bag.
The day he met Cheng Xiaoshi was no different from any other. Just another one of those days without a distinct goal, where he had to figure out how to fill his starving stomach and quench his dry throat. Lu Guang found these monotonous days neither particularly impressive nor completely depressing. He didn't want to die painfully, but he had no reason to live painfully either.
If there was anything slightly different, it was the overcast sky. As the factories that used to run without a pause ground to a halt, the sky had turned to a piercing, blinding blue, and the black smog was slowly forgotten by the remaining survivors. Seeing the hazy atmosphere for the first time in a while, looking much like a day thick with fine dust, he felt a strange sense of nostalgia for a time that would never return.
Lu Guang was preparing to leave the rural village where he had stayed for four months. The food in the abandoned houses was finally running low. Although he hadn't encountered any mutated creatures or humans, traces of someone's presence had begun to appear frequently, forcing him to begin yet another endless exile.
The village he had reached after months of wandering lacked nothing essential for basic survival. Because the population had been small to begin with, there was no stench of rotting corpses. Lu Guang couldn't help but feel a deep sense of regret about having to move on. It was hard to find places like these without anyone.
However, considering that another human in the village might be a psychopath who slit throats for fun, leaving was the only rational choice. In fact, he had encountered such people before.
Lu Guang stepped onto the unpaved dirt ground with sneakers whose soles were peeling off, bound together by layers of box tape. The new beginning didn't refresh his mood, though it felt slightly more special than usual. Even if by tomorrow, everything would become just as tedious again.
It was right at that moment, as he was about to leave the village with those idle thoughts.
"Ah! A person! I finally found someone!"
A high voice shouted with all its might. It was a booming sound that shattered the silence of the village, which was normally so quiet that even the rustle of leaves could cause a stir. In the distance, he could see a black ponytail fluttering in the wind.
After checking the surroundings to ensure the scream hadn't attracted any monsters, Lu Guang looked back at the person, who now had a hand clamped over his mouth as if finally realizing what he had just done.
It felt absolutely brilliant. Watching the uninvited guest approach with large, sweeping strides, Lu Guang looked up at the weather—which looked ready to hurl a lightning bolt right into the middle of a flat plain—and thought it couldn't be more welcome. He wished it would strike the human standing next to him. Preferably right now.
"The name’s Cheng Xiaoshi. Age... probably twenty-five. I'd need a calendar to know how many years have actually passed."
Unsurprisingly, the laughing man in front of Lu Guang held out his hand after that.
"...Lu Guang."
"So your name is Lu Guang? Guang-guang, then! Guang-guang!"
Bright laughter echoed through the empty village. This man named Cheng Xiaoshi... acted like someone who didn't truly grasp the gravity of his situation. To put it nicely, he was terribly bright and lively; Lu guang would say, he was just plain stupid. After all, he was a human who screamed before checking for the presence of mutated creatures that have remarkably sharp hearing.
Lu Guang found himself slightly intrigued. Just a little. Didn't humans naturally seek greater stimulation? Because he missed a vibrant daily life, he decided to accept Cheng Xiaoshi as a temporary part of his reality. Only for a while.
"So, Lu Guang. Where are you heading?"
"What do you mean, where am I heading?"
"Weren't you about to leave? You came out with all your bags packed."
Just as he said, unlike Lu Guang, who carried a massive backpack on his spine, Cheng Xiaoshi had nothing on him except a small backpack worn on his front. Lu Guang stared at Cheng Xiaoshi for a moment, suspicious of how empty-handed he was, but soon dismissed his doubts and looked out toward the distant horizon.
"Who knows. Is there anyone who actually travels with a destination in mind in times like this?"
"Uh... Me?"
The tall man said, brushing his long, dark hair back. His eyes crinkled into crescents in sync with his heartbeat, presenting quite a sight. Witnessing that scene, Lu Guang experienced a moment where he was genuinely lost for words for the first time in ages. Yet, somehow, it felt as though he could finally breathe at the same time.
Feeling the muscles in his face loosen, he tried to hide it. Perhaps this was the fate of a human who had abandoned the duties of a social animal for too long; having just engaged in what could finally be called communication, Lu Guang began to wonder if his heart was an organ meant to beat right next to his eardrum.
Cheng Xiaoshi narrowed his eyes and looked down at Lu Guang, seemingly contemplating what words to choose. Lu Guang simply watched him.
"You know, Lu Guang. Since meeting like this, why don't you come to my place?” He paused, “I, well, I've been living in the same place I lived in before all of this happened. So that’s what I mean by it. Whenever I go out, I always have a place to come back."
That was astonishing, really. More because the very first thing Lu Guang had to abandon was his home.
Unluckily for him, he had lived on the first floor. While the high-pitched voice on the television delivered terrible breaking news faster than any other media, those things heard it and shattered the windows and forced their way inside.
Whether he read something from his expression or not, Cheng Xiaoshi offered a bitter smile.
"Our town was a bit far from the city, so there weren't many people. The day that it all broke out was a Sunday with a big festival in the city, so there was barely anyone around.” He looked like he was saying things that hurt himself at the same time, “The few monsters in the village don’t roam in packs either, for some reason. It was really just pure luck. I'm not lying or anything."
Though his face was filled with embarrassment, he concluded his words with a firm tone and expression on the final sentence.
Lu Guang, who hadn't escaped his swamp of lethargy, had intended to follow him without a word even if he doubted Cheng Xiaoshi's intentions, but...
Lu Guang looked at Cheng Xiaoshi standing before him. There was something deeply sorrowful about his face. Something Lu Guang can’t ignore.
Damnit.
"Then, shall we go there?"
For the first time, Lu Guang asked, and Cheng Xiaoshi smiles, the way he would never get himself to forget.
The two decided to set off on their journey together. Cheng Xiaoshi's claim that his place was close to the village was true, and the journey turned out to be less than a day's walk.
It turned out that the traces of human presence Lu Guang had noticed in the village were actually left by Cheng Xiaoshi during his round trips home. Lu Guang asked him about it; they couldn't allow an awkward silence to fill the air for half a day.
And of course, it was a bad idea.
"Well, I'm looking for someone. We used to live together like family, but when things went down, I locked all the doors and just stayed upstairs..."
What followed was a predictable story. He had barely gathered his senses and stepped out the door only to find the streets already in ruins, and his precious person was nowhere to be found. Compared to others who had met far more tragic ends, this simple tale was even relieving to hear.
Yet, Cheng Xiaoshi’s dark brown eyes held a devastating sorrow—an expression that screams heartbroken so well that it breakers his heart, too.
In the first place, Lu Guang had no right to measure one’s values. The person who had truly lost nothing was none other than himself.
"Her name was Qiao Ling. I, well, my parents have not been there for me since I was young, so Qiao Ling looked out for me like a real brother. We were closer than actual family...” He fades out, his lips slightly tilted like he is re-living the past memories.
Oh, when it happened, Qiao Ling was probably at the festival. With her college friends. I... wasn't feeling well, so I stayed home."
But I should’ve gone with her unsaid, but said enough, lingering in the air between them.
He probably didn't know it himself since he couldn't see his own face when talking about his family, but whenever Cheng Xiaoshi spoke of the person he cherished, his deep eyes would sparkle as if holding the entire galaxy.
It wasn't entirely filled with regret and sadness; within those large pupils, there was longing, distant nostalgia, and occasionally, emotions closely resembling happiness and joy.
Only then could Lu Guang feel certain that the man before him was a living human, not an illusion of his own possible craziness.
Cheng Xiaoshi couldn’t keep his mouth shut for a minute, acting as if staying quiet would cause him to break out in hives. Contrary to Lu Guang's belief that the mood would plunge into bleakness, by the time they had walked enough for their feet to ache, Cheng Xiaoshi was the only one speaking. He was just thankful at this point.
"Our neighborhood even has a basketball court. Do you know how to play? The monsters? I've played there a few times, and they don't seem to hunt you down just from the sound of a bouncing ball. Like I said, they don't move in packs. If things go south, we can just run for it! I was the ace in basketball for my whole life because I'm a great runner!"
"Actually, my place isn't just a house. It's a photo studio. Hero Photo Studio. It was something I always wanted to do, family business and stuff, so I ran it with Qiao Ling's help. I still have to pay her back for that... Yeah, when I see her again, I'm definitely paying her back. With pancreas and everything."
"Lu Guang, how old are you? What! You're one year younger than me! Call me Cheng Xiaoshi-ge, Lu Guang.” Lu Guang actually snorted at that. “Hey! Show some respect for your elders!"
Lu Guang learned that Cheng Xiaoshi was good at basketball. He had run the photo studio on his own, and he genuinely enjoyed the work. He was one year older than Lu Guang, though he was so immature that the reverse seemed far more believable.
Furthermore, he thrived on human contact. He considered a woman named Qiao Ling his family, possessed an abundance of affection, and above all...
Cheng Xiaoshi was terribly lonely.
Lu Guang had guessed as much from the moment the man confessed that he blindly invited a complete stranger to his house just because he hated being alone in the studio, but Cheng Xiaoshi avoided isolation so intensely that it made one wonder how he had managed to survive alone in that studio for two years.
Treating a stranger with boundless warmth, he clung to Lu Guang, craving human warmth simply because of the fragments of loneliness that brought a pitiful look to his face.
Lu Guang had no intention of correcting this skewed dynamic, yet something inexplicable tickled deep within his chest. Surely, he was moved by Cheng Xiaoshi's senseless trust and devotion toward humanity.
After surrendering his eardrums to him for three continuous hours to hear Cheng Xiaoshi’s story, Lu Guang now stood facing the large sign of the photo studio.
”Now, how is this!”
"It's... cleaner than I thought."
"Really? Thank goodness! I clean it every day when no one's around. Trying to stay quiet makes it take three or four times longer than usual, but clearing everything out makes me feel better, so I try to do it at least once a month. Though I haven't done it lately."
He had intended to point out that keeping a single building spotless while the neighboring shops were thick with dust would only attract the attention of other survivors with unhealthy intentions.
However, looking up at the proud expression on the man's face, Lu Guang found himself unable to say a word. If Lu Guang stayed by his side, he could help prepare for any potential danger. And that was the point that Lu Guang realized he had begun to envision a considerable future spent alongside Cheng Xiaoshi.
With the person he just met four hours ago.
It was too late to view this as a mere passing amusement; Lu Guang had already listened to the entirety of Cheng Xiaoshi's short life. Like a reader who connects and empathizes with a character while reading a book, Lu Guang had become utterly captivated by Cheng Xiaoshi’s world.
But really, seeking bright and shining things is merely an inherent human trait! And Cheng Xiaoshi was literally emitting light. Lu Guang was simply committing himself thoroughly to living as a human being.
Lu Guang stared blankly at Cheng Xiaoshi, who threw the green door wide open and invited him inside.
"Don't just stand there dazed, hurry up and get in! The sun is setting, and the monsters in our town have perfectly fine hearing. If you're going to stay out there, at least toss me the backpack first!"
Cheng Xiaoshi spoke with a playful voice, tilting his head. Unable to suppress a faint chuckle, Lu Guang stepped toward him.
The moment Lu Guang entered, the door shut and the lock clicked into place. It was likely a double-locking mechanism designed to prevent thieves but now block creatures from entering.
In other words, leaving this photo studio would no longer be easy. If this had all been a trap, there could be no better timing to attack; it was the perfect moment to ensnare a drop-guarded prey who had accompanied the predator.
Cheng Xiaoshi, probably completely unaware of Lu Guang tightening his sensitive senses through such thoughts, promptly dashed forward and ran up the stairs. Unlike the clean sign outside, the first floor was worn down and covered in dust in various places.
The cleanest spot was the flight of stairs, which implied he had walked up and down them frequently enough to leave no time for dust to settle. Lu Guang listened to Cheng Xiaoshi's voice while looking at the gray smudges of dust coating his fingertips.
"There's not much to see on the first floor, so quickly get up to the second floor! Lu Guang, my bed is a bunk bed I got cheap at a secondhand market, so I need to make sure it won't collapse with someone sleeping above me!"
"Alright, Cheng Xiaoshi. Be quiet now."
Lu Guang spoke, noticing that the view outside the window—which was heavily covered in blue tape, obscuring the sight—had grown a shade darker. The night, where the biological functions of the mutated creatures would hyper-develop compared to the daytime, was approaching. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Cheng Xiaoshi nod silently.
Lu Guang climbed the stairs as quietly as possible. From the top, an excited Cheng Xiaoshi silently urged him to hurry up. The room revealed on the second floor was cozy. It certainly didn’t feel like a place where creatures with virus would swarm in at any moment.
"How is it? Pretty comfy, right?"
Cheng Xiaoshi whispered. It could easily be described as the smile of an unrefutably happy person. He seemed deeply moved by the simple fact that a living human was talking with him in the house.
Before Lu Guang could even answer the question, the moment his head touched a proper mattress for the first time in a long while, he plunged into a deep, heavy sleep.
He felt as though he had dreamed. It must have been a happy dream, yet when he opened his eyes, there was nothing grasped in his hands.
The analog clock hanging in the room was slowly winding down as its battery depleted, mirroring the passing time of a world; its end was close at hand. Cheng Xiaoshi had confidently claimed that food was plentiful. Looking at the pantry stocked with canned goods, it wasn’t a lie.
Aside from the inhuman shrieks that occasionally drifted in from far away, Hero Photo Studio felt entirely detached from the outside world.
As long as the sun was up, the windows allowed tilted beams of sunlight to illuminate the interior perfectly without electricity. It was entirely different from the basements or densely packed buildings Lu Guang had always frequented, where natural light couldn't penetrate.
They sometimes go out to look for anything that would help with living, too. Which Lu Guang couldn’t have done easily before because being alone is vulnerable. It makes him nearly excited like a child. Nearly.
Everything was jarringly different. One could easily believe the town was a holy ground blessed by a god. It felt empty yet sacred.
The piercing cold fled to the opposite side of the earth, and after the last spring frost passed, summer drew near. Before coming to live with Cheng Xiaoshi, time dragged so slowly that a single day felt like a week, but here, the axis of time seemed warped, slipping away rapidly. The slower the clock hands moved, the faster time seemed to pass.
Everything was peaceful without any incidents, and aside from his conversations with Cheng Xiaoshi, his daily routine was no different than before, yet Lu Guang never felt bored.
A life that had once possessed nothing seemed to have gained an actual meaning.
"Lu Guang, if all this zombie thing ever ends, let's take a trip to Yingdu once it's over."
"...We could go right now, if you want to."
"It's too far! Just walking to the village you were in was exhausting for me. I would most likely pass out and you’d have to carry me home."
"...Suit yourself."
"Great! We're definitely bringing a camera, and I'm absolutely making you wear a cat hat. Then I'll take about five hundred pictures to tease you every single day."
"...."
The lack of response continued but it was not awkward. Lu Guang closed his eyes and listened to the low humming of the other.
"Mhm, that too... but once things settle down, I'm changing the shop sign first."
Cheng Xiaoshi beamed up and Lu Guang couldn’t help but stare at him.
"The sign? Why so suddenly?"
"I'm going to change the name of the studio! Hmm, how about ShiGuang Photo Studio, taking a character from each of our names?"
"...I don't even live here. We haven't even known each other that long, Cheng Xiaoshi. Don't make such major decisions so lightly."
Cheng Xiaoshi rolled his eyes at that, which was new to him.
"I'm not being light about it! You're the first person I've revealed everything like this, Lu Guang. And we’re even living together! Since things turned out this way, let's be business partners. ShiGuang Photo Studio sounds great."
"...Do whatever you want."
"Eh, Lu Guang! You blushing right now? I didn’t know you were a cute boy, partner!"
"Don't call me a partner."
“But really, the cat hat would fit you so perfectly.”
Lu Guang threw a pillow at him to hide the corner of his mouth subtly tilted upwards.
It was a conversation without context. The very assumption, riddled with the uncertainty that all of this would one day come to an end, was entirely flawed. Even so, Lu Guang quite enjoyed indulging in this domestic playing-pretend.
He didn't know. Perhaps he was experiencing what he had only ever encountered through media: love. After all, the uncontrollable racing of his heart whenever black hair entered his field of vision, or the heat rushing to his face, were not normal reactions to have toward a male peer.
It was highly probable that he was mistaking the intimacy forged with another human in an extreme situation for love, or perhaps, just perhaps...
Well, whatever it is, it was obvious that Cheng Xiaoshi had become irreplaceable in Lu Guang’s life.
Lu Guang wished time would stop right this instant. If it froze like this, it would be perfect. Defining his own emotions had already taken too long. If it was real, even this passing time felt like a waste.
Because the second floor of the studio, which he used to climb with bated breath, and the deep nights in the small room where only the two of them slept through nightmares, had all become precious jewels he refused to lose.
Then, all of a sudden Lu Guang wanted to ask Cheng Xiaoshi. If they had met in a normal world, would he still have reached out to hold his hand?
Cheng Xiaoshi was always proposing and executing random things out of nowhere, but that day was even more unexpected. It was maybe July, lazy, sun-drenched noon when he suddenly grabbed Lu Guang's hand, claiming there was a place he wanted to visit with him, and led him out of the photo studio.
"...Cheng Xiaoshi!"
"Just follow me without complaining, there's something I want to show you! I just thought of it now!"
Lu Guang indeed followed him, dragging his feet in sneakers with intact soles that Cheng Xiaoshi had dug out of the shoe rack. A hot wind blew against his face. The scent of summer brushed past his entire body alongside Cheng Xiaoshi's scent.
Aside from the eerily empty streets, the situation of running together while holding hands felt like a total dream.
Over the shimmering heat rising from the ground, he thought he could hear the hallucination of cicadas for a moment.
"...Cheng Xiaoshi, where are we going?"
"It's no fun if I tell you. Hmm."
Lu Guang didn't ask further. Cheng Xiaoshi, as reckless as he is, might lead them into danger, but no matter what happened he would never let go of his hand until the very moment of destruction, so it didn’t matter whatsoever.
His vision blurred. Whether due to the heat shimmer or dizziness from malnutrition, he honestly didn’t care, because Cheng Xiaoshi tightened his grip on Lu Guang's hand.
To prevent himself from collapsing unsightly, he squeezed back against that slender hand. Their fingers intertwined, and Lu Guang couldn’t help but let out a low laugh full of satisfaction.
"Lu Guang... if you pass out from the heat, know that I'm leaving you behind and would run right away."
"Let's go back quickly, Cheng Xiaoshi. Let's just see this place you wanted to show me and return right back to the studio."
It came out like a child whining to go back home. Cheng Xiaoshi just glanced at him with masked eyes that Lu Guang couldn’t bring himself to interpret.
"I'll even give you permission to change the name to ShiGuang Photo Studio."
"Heh, pretending you didn't care at all, but you remembered in the end. We don’t need to hurry, Lu Guang, we're already here anyway."
Before them stood a modest red brick building. Lu Guang instantly recognized it as a church. Finding no way to fathom Cheng Xiaoshi's intention, he remained silent.
"...A church?"
"Yeah, I didn't attend church, but I was close with the priest. He used to give me snacks... He was a good man. I come here occasionally, wondering if he might have returned."
"What about the creatures?"
"It's pretty interesting, but they don't enter this building. The people of our town were quite devout believers. It might be engraved into their instincts or something."
Lu Guang bypassed a topic that scientists would find fascinating and moved his feet.
He didn't believe in god, but because Cheng Xiaoshi had introduced the place, it drew his interest. Or maybe it merely the fickle nature of a human seeking an absolute god in an extreme situation. If so, he might need to prepare for confession.
The church doors stood widely open. Seeing how they were fixed to stay open, it seemed the last conscious act of the clergy was to create a sanctuary accessible to anyone, regardless of the circumstances. Mahogany pews were lined up, with worn cushions scattered haphazardly on top.
Standing in the center aisle, the figure of Jesus nailed to the cross loomed ahead. The sculpture, symbolizing human sin and burden, had somehow become a beacon of hope, saving humans from this abyss. Cheng Xiaoshi didn't kneel or join his hands in prayer, but his eyes were closed.
Lu Guang simply watched Cheng Xiaoshi. If faith and love were nothing more than unattainable mirages and illusions in this world, he would choose to kiss Cheng Xiaoshi's lowered eyelids.
Instead of praying desperately to a god for a miracle, he would praise the miracle standing right before him. Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes caught the sunlight filtering through the window, shining like gold.
"Cheng Xiaoshi, your eyes look golden right now," Lu Guang whispered.
"...Really? Is it pretty?"
The church was silent. The only things lingering by his ears were the heavy air and the rustle of their clothes brushing against each other. Lu Guang gazed into Cheng Xiaoshi's clear, serene eyes, which looked like a full moon.
It felt as though only the two of them were left in this massive world. A warm wind that muddled his mind seeped through the open doors.
Like someone intoxicated by a midsummer night's dream, Lu Guang anchored his suddenly hazy mind and barely managed to murmur, "...Yeah."
As if on cue, a violent gust of wind blew. The church windows rattled loudly, creating a sharp din. In the distance, creatures reacted, letting out piercing screeches.
In the midst of that chaos, at a time when his entire body should have frozen in terror and fear, Lu Guang felt entirely at peace.
It wasn't because of the sacred, holy church. The thing that eroded his fear was...
Ah, the beautiful man before him was smiling. As if he had become the happiest person in this world full of deficiency and pain, like Lu Guang's single word had saved him.
The wind was blowing. He was falling.