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It’s a well-known fact within Class 1-A that Bakugou is the designated bug-catcher. To them, the boy was practically fearless; he was clearly the obvious choice. He’d never admit it, but knowing he was the one they all trusted with this duty filled him with a childlike sense of pride.
If Kaminari jumped back from a corner with a startled yelp, Bakugou would roll his eyes and saunter up to the offending spider before squashing it beneath his toe.
If Deku came squealing about a roach hiding under his bed, Bakugou would scoff and barge into the boy’s room, snatching it up in a paper towel and chucking the nasty thing outside.
Like he said. Obvious choice. No way would he let a bug get the best of him.
When Hagakure lets out a high-pitched shriek, he has a feeling he knows exactly what the cause of it is; he turns from where he’s chopping vegetables on the kitchen counter to survey the situation, and sure enough, the girl seems to be frantically looking around. When she- well, he thinks- meets his gaze, the tension in her shoulders seems to release just a bit. “Bakugou!” she cries. “Oh, thank goodness. This- this thing is terrorizing me and it’s huge and it’s fuzzy and it won’t go away so willyouplease-” her voice pitches up in another scream, shoulders rising impossibly high, as it flies close to her head- “come murder it to death!”
Murder it to death? He raises an eyebrow at her obvious distress- and at the redundant phrase- before setting his knife down onto the cutting board and strolling over to her. “Where-”
Oh, hell no.
He suppresses a shudder as he actually sees the thing, its huge eyes and hairy body taunting him as the moth flies around Hagakure’s invisible head. Katsuki detests moths.
“Why did you stop? Save me!” the girl screeches, hands gripping at the collar of his tee. “It’s going to lay eggs in my hair, Bakugou. In my hair. I can’t see my hair. I need you to explode this thing yesterday!”
Katsuki swallows, shaking her off. “I have vegetables to chop. You extras can’t cook for shit, so someone needs to keep you alive. Just go tell Kouda to deal with it. He can talk to bugs.”
“You’re right here, though,” Hagakure whines. “Why can’t you just do it? You’re good at catching bugs. You’ve already walked over.”
“I told you,” he says, praying his voice doesn’t come out as hoarse as he thinks it does, “vegetables. Get Kouda, idiot.”
“Bakugou.”
He turns around.
“Bakugou.”
He does not like that teasing tone. He walks away- casually- before she sneaks up and snatches his wrist, and really, why can’t any of these boneheads leave him alone? He tries to shake her off, but her grip on his wrist is tight, so he sort of just ends up dragging her behind him to the kitchen.
“Bakugou.”
“What?” he growls, breaking her grip as he whirls around to face her. “Just deal with it, you damn baby! It won’t kill you!”
“You’re afraid of moths,” she says, and even with his shit ears, he can hear the sly smile creeping into her voice. “You, Lord Explodo-Kills, Bakugou Katsuki, are afraid of moths.”
“I- no!” he barks, and regrets how childish it sounds the moment it leaves his mouth.
Hagakure dissolves into giggles. “Oh, man. I have to get Kiri. He’s gonna get such a kick out of this.” Now Katsuki is the one reaching for her wrist, but she’s invisible and wearing a tank top and he has no clue where her arm is.
“Don’t you dare!” he yells after her, but she is already bounding up the stairs, and all he can do is watch as she disappears from his sight.
Quickly, he removes his hearing aids and shoves them roughly into his pocket. Is it petty? Yes, but who ever said he was above a little pettiness?
When Kirishima’s voice, muffled as it may be, reaches his ears, his spine stiffens imperceptibly and he begins mincing the carrots into oblivion. He does not turn around.
“-kubro.”
Nope. Absolutely not.
“Bakubro,” Kirishima says, closer now, tapping his shoulder lightly. He stiffens. “Wanna… moth?”
Katsuki finally turns around. With a bored expression, he signs, Can’t hear you. Making dinner. Stop hovering and go do something useful. He looks away from Eijirou, and- why is Dunce Face snickering over the redhead’s shoulder? Why is he here?
Eijirou frowns. “Why… aids out? I… sign.”
In short, Bakugou had taken out his hearing aids to avoid communication with Kirishima. Could he speak mostly coherently without the help of his hearing aids? Yes, but he obviously wasn’t going to talk about the moth, and Kirishima- who, though he was trying his best to learn- didn’t know enough sign to understand what he was saying. Bingo.
“-getting Midoriya.”
Dammit.
Of course he was going to get Deku, who happened to be fluent in sign- curse the considerate idiot- and then Katsuki would have to deal with even more of this crap. Sighing, he puts his hearing aids back in and grips Kiri’s shoulder before the hole he digs himself gets even wider. “Did you need something, Hair-for-Brains?”
Eijirou grins broadly at him, and he does not like that look. “Just wondering if you were gonna help Hagakure with that moth. She asked me, but I’m the worst at catching bugs, and you’ve gotten every single one since we’ve moved into the dorms. You’re obviously the best option here.”
“Kouda Kouji. I’ve been saying this. He can literally talk to bugs.”
“Yeah, but you’re already down here.”
Katsuki scoffs and tosses the vegetables into a pan. “I’m busy, idiot. Can’t you see that?
The thing Katsuki can appreciate about Eijirou is that he knows when to stop. He relents, blowing a short laugh through his nose, and goes to sit on the couch. “Alright, Bakubro, I’ll leave you alone,” he grins.
Katsuki sighs heavily, turning back to the pan on the stove- finally, peace- but he’d unfortunately forgotten about Kaminari, who had been creeping steadily closer over the course of his conversation with Eijirou. The yellow-haired dolt pokes his shoulder, grinning widely.
“What?” Katsuki groans. “Can’t you people leave me alone for two seconds?”
“Get the moth. Hagakure and I are scared. Are you scared, Bakugou?”
Katsuki shoves him off and turns back to the vegetables.
“‘Cause I certainly don’t want a moth crawling all over me. Can you imagine? Those huge, ugly wings flapping in your face, and its giant bug eyes- they stare into your soul, Bakugou- and they’re so fuzzy, and you don’t know what’s gotten into its bug hair, and it’ll crawl into your mouth or your ears and lay its eggs in your brains-”
Bakugou glares at him, trying his very best to keep from looking unsettled, before he turns back to the stove with a scowl.
And then he feels something brush his back.
Katsuki spins around, heart pounding, before he realizes Kaminari is cackling, and he seizes his arm with murder in his bright red eyes.
“You will back slowly out of this kitchen, you absolute moron, before I shatter all of the bones in your body. Do you hear me?”
“Um, guys?”
Katsuki ignores Hagakure, tiny explosions popping in his free palm.
“Guys.”
Kaminari still has that grin plastered onto his face, and Katsuki will show him-
“Guys!”
“What?” Katsuki snaps, baring his teeth at her.
“Where’s the moth?”
Oh no.
Oh, no.
Katsuki glances around for the insect, eyes narrowed into slits. He would not let this thing get the best of him. He would not.
He lets go of Kaminari, casting his gaze around the common room, creeping slowly towards the corner where Hagakure had first run into it. He stops once he reaches it, carefully turning around. “Maybe it flew upstairs,” Eijirou pipes up from his spot on the couch.
And then it materializes out of nowhere and lands on Katsuki’s face.
He jumps, slamming his head and back into the wall, spitting curses at the thing as his voice steadily rises in pitch, and it won’t get off his face, and it’s going to contaminate him with its moth germs, and he’s going to raze the building to the ground, and he says so, and Hagakure is screaming bloody murder, and-
Get it off.
He can't breathe.
Get it off.
He will explode everything in the building.
Voice thready, he croaks, "Get it off-"
-and suddenly Kaminari is slapping his left cheek in a panic. The moth flutters to the ground, and Denki’s handprint is bright red on Katsuki’s face.
Everything is completely silent.
And then Kirishima is howling in laughter, phone extended in one hand, clutching at his side with the other. “Katsuki- I’ve never seen-” and then he’s cackling again, and Bakugou’s ears are bright red in his embarrassment.
“If you extras tell anyone-”
“Too late,” Kaminari grins.
Huh?
He holds his phone to Bakugou. It’s open to their group chat, and the latest message is a video from Kirishima.
Of him.
He knows what it is without even tapping on it.
“I am going to murder all of you,” he spits, the flush lighting up his ears spreading across his cheeks as he curls his lip. “Slowly and very painfully. I will roast you like a Costco rotisserie chicken on a spit. You’d better-”
And then the smell of burning is wafting into his nostrils. Really, could this afternoon get any worse?
Katsuki sprints to the stove, but it’s too late; the vegetables are completely charred, and he’s going to have to start again because these dumbasses couldn’t be bothered to go and get Kouda.
“You’re all dead! You’re so dead!” he screams, palms popping, glaring with all the force of the sun. “Get out. No dinner for any of you! See if I ever catch another bug again!”
When the three finally scram, tails between their legs, Katsuki groans after dumping the vegetables in the trash and trudges to his room.
They can fend for themselves. He needs a nap.
