Work Text:
i.
We’re riding on the night bus. It’s three am. There’s only one other passenger with us, someone on their way home from a night out. They’ve passed out and don’t see us. The driver’s eyes are focused on the road. I take her hand and she leans her head on my shoulder. I wish the world was different. I wish for a world where we didn’t have to be afraid to hold hands even in the dark night. I wish for a world where we were allowed to love and exist. The window is foggy and I reach out to draw a small heart with even smaller letters A + E in it. She presses a small kiss to my jaw.
ii.
Nothing can stop us now. We’re on top of the world. On the rooftop of the hospital, at least. We’re drunk. She stole the bottle from her dad’s liquor cabinet. I kissed her for the first time today. On the rooftop, under the stars. We are invisible here. Nothing can hurt us. We are lying side by side, looking at the night sky. The constellations above us and on her skin. Her eyes sparkle in the dark. I love her so much it hurts.
iii.
Her dad threw her out today. He doesn’t approve her lifestyle, apparently. We don’t know what we’re going to do, not yet. Together we will figure this out. She’s going to stay over at our friends’ for a while. She didn’t cry or get mad, she just stood there, silent, as her father yelled abuse at her. She cried afterwards. I held her in my arms and cried with her. I’m going to help her. I’m going to get a job and save up some money, I’m going to get us a small apartment from the city. We can live together there and not give a fuck about those who don’t approve of us or our lifestyle. We have our love for each other and that’s enough.
iv.
She’s lying beneath me, on my bed. She looks so vulnerable and sexy at the same time. She’s nervous, I can tell. I am too. Neither of us has done this before. I reach out to tuck a loose curl behind her ear. I tell her how much I love her. Her smile calms me. I lean down to kiss her again. She’s so sensual and reacts to my touch beautifully. She makes me feel so powerful, so in control. She surrenders herself to me fully.
v.
I fucked up. I made a mistake. She’s never going to forgive me so there’s no point in even trying. I fucked up. I wish we had met at a different time, at the point in our lives when we were both ready for this. When we were less raw, less broken. She stormed out only fifteen minutes ago, tears on her cheeks and I ache to run after her. To hold her close and make her feel better. Even though this is all my fault. Why am I like this?
vi.
We sit on a blanket in the park. We’re having a picnic, just the two of us. When we’re together everything is well in life. She feeds me strawberries and I can't help but laugh at the cliche. I’ve come to love cliches. I absentmindedly pluck small flowers off the ground. I push them into her hair. They make her look like a goddess, a mythical forest creature. I kiss her on the nose, on her eyelids and temples and at last, on her lips. She tastes like summer.
vii.
She once told me, a long time ago, that she wanted to be a lawyer. I’m now standing at her graduation holding back happy tears. Many things happened in between, some bad, some good. But she never gave up her dream. It took much longer than she first expected, with more setbacks than she expected. But here we are today. She waves at me from the stage and I blow her a kiss. She giggles. She’s too far away for me to hear it but I know exactly what it sounds like. It sounds like home. The smile on her face lights up the whole room.