Chapter Text
No matter how Rocky looked at it, human bodies were just so…inefficient.
They were unique. Complex and interesting, yes, but there were just SO many flaws. Why were there so many holes for bacteria to enter? Why so soft, squishy, and full of fluid?
Grace leaked all the time. It leaked from its ocular holes, it leaked out of its consumption hole when eating, and it even leaked blood from the tiniest injuries. Sometimes, when it moved around a lot doing its “exercise”, its entire body leaked. Ugh!
Rocky had found all this and more so disgusting when he was first getting used to the alien. But now, after being around it so much, it wasn’t as bothersome. If anything, Grace’s leakiness had become a comfort. A reminder that his strange alien friend had come back for Rocky and Erid. A reminder that Grace was still alive.
In a way, Rocky had started to find what he previously thought was disgusting as almost…beautiful.
Well, not all things. For example, humans so easily get sick! They were such fragile creatures that required so many things. That’s where Eridian’s bodies were truly superior. Sickness was possible, but exceedingly rare outside of the young or the elderly. Bacteria had few chances to make it within their sealed carapaces. And whichever bacteria were able to sneak in were usually boiled to death due to Eridian’s high internal temperatures.
That is not to say they couldn’t get sick.
There were a couple of well-known illnesses that any healthy-bodied Eridian could get. A new one that Rocky had learned about from Grace was that of radiation sickness. Not even the thickest Eridian could survive their body breaking down in such a way.
There was another illness, one that was quite rare. In fact, there was almost a running joke on Erid about it. Something about being deeply emotional, all five hearts beating for someone else. There were many a poorly written romance plots focused on it, to Rocky’s disdain.
With all this in mind, it felt like a joke when Rocky first started feeling sick.
Rocky had never really been ill before. He’d been so sad and lonely that it physically hurt, yes, those long years alone on the Blip-A. But he’d never been sick to know what the symptoms would feel like. So it absolutely sucked when he started doing the equivalent of human coughing.
Rocky and Grace were both in the lab when it happened the first time. Grace had borrowed a little xenonite for some kind of experiment. Rocky had been watching it work. When Grace worked, it sometimes got lost in some sort of flow state. Grace had called it “locking in”. It had been working intensely for quite a while when suddenly it jumped up in excitement and started pumping one of its limbs in the air.
“We did it, Rock! It worked!”
The silly human leaned over to Rocky and held up a fist. Rocky mimicked it, tapping his own fist against the clear xenonite wall separating them. Its mouth was open wide in what Rocky now knew was a smile, expressing joy and happiness. It let out a few giggles before turning back to its experiment.
It wasn’t anything that Grace had never done before. Yet this time, Rocky felt all five of his hearts racing at its smile. Grace’s giggle was so similar to an Eridian’s. Rocky wanted to make it laugh again, to be the reason for its joy.
Such thoughts had barely begun when there was suddenly a strange physical feeling inside Rocky. It felt like something was moving, a strange buzz reverberating throughout his body. It was deeply uncomfortable and continued to increase in intensity until Rocky suddenly felt like he had to open his ventral seal right now and get something out out out. It was all so quick that Rocky could barely think about how absolutely wrong it felt.
Rocky’s ventral seal spasmed open a crack, letting out a harsh puff of air. It let out a small, hissing noise that was way too quiet for Grace to hear, but immediately had alarm bells going off in Rocky’s head.
Rocky had heard of such things happening before. It happened when there was atypical growth inside an Eridian’s carapace, disturbing and potentially displacing the proper and fragile autonomy inside. It caused an increase in internal pressure, requiring a release of sorts. It was very dangerous because the Eridian had little control over when their ventral seal would slightly open, potentially exposing their fragile inner body to different bacteria and pathogens. Thankfully, Rocky would likely be fine with some sporadic openings due to the consistency of the Hail Mary’s environment. The real question was what caused it.
There were a few potential reasons for his body’s reaction, but almost none that made sense as Rocky had mentally gone down the list. It could be some side effect of having been in space for so long, exposure to the radiation Grace had explained was deadly to living things.
Rocky did have a hypothesis, one that made logical sense considering the situation of his environment and presenting symptoms. Everything was lining up and pointing to one answer. Yet, Rocky felt like that had to be wrong. Rocky was usually about to look at the facts and make a decision based on provable things, hard evidence based on sound reasoning.
Usually, he was able to sideline his feelings to be reasonable and make sometimes the smart but hard choices.
Yet now, Rocky found himself being stubborn. He wanted to ignore the facts. Recognizing them would make it true. True that Rocky had been a reckless fool. Rocky was a rational Eridian. How could he allow himself to become literally lovesick?
Rocky wasn’t new to love and romance. He was quite romantic back when he had courted Adrian. And oh, how he missed his mate dearly.
Rocky believed that true love existed; he’d found it himself with his mate. He had proven its existence once more when he became best friends with Grace despite being of different species whose homes were light-years apart.
Because of Grace, a part of Rocky now believed, deep down, in the concept of fate and soulmates. Rocky knew the math. The statistical chance of all things that had to happen and align for the two of them to meet, to work together and save the stars together, was so incredibly slim. It was so statistically small, full of so many coincidences, that it couldn’t have been anything but fate for them to meet.
Grace, who filled a hole in Rocky that he hadn’t even known existed. Grace, who traveled across time and space and found Rocky not once, but twice. Grace, who saved Rocky, in more ways than it probably knew.
So maybe Rocky was more sentimental than he’d thought.
Despite this, he still didn’t want to admit the most likely answer to this new problem. He tried his best to ignore it even though he knew it wouldn’t go away on its own. It would continue to progress, to fester and worsen with time.
But realistically, what was he supposed to do about it? In the middle of space, still so far from home. At least Grace had its medical robot. Rocky didn’t even have the equivalent of a first aid kit. And Rocky was no doctor; he was an engineer. He knew there were treatments for such an illness back on Erid, although none were really worth what would be the cost of removing such an affliction.
Rocky wondered what Adrian would think if they knew. How Adrian would react if Rocky told them. Would Adrian cry? Would Adrian beg Rocky to get the treatment? Has Adrian already moved on after years and years of Rocky being presumed dead?
Would Adrian understand?
Rocky would like to think they would. His mate was fair, open-minded, and curious to a fault.
If there was anyone who would understand how easy it was to fall in love with Grace, it would be them.
The two of them had talked about it once, the sickness that Rocky was now in the early stages of. A relative on Adrian’s side of the family, quite distant, had got it. Adrian barely knew them, but the mated pair still showed up at the goodbye gathering when they were in their last-stage, final days. Many friends and family had urged the Eridian in question to get the surgery, but they had refused.
“It is worth it to remember them,” they had replied, their voice straining from constant pain and with the effort to speak around the internal obstructions.
One of their mates had stamped a claw in anger, calling the dying Eridian foolish for holding onto such feelings, selfish for leaving them behind. For valuing the memories of someone who didn’t, wouldn’t ever love them back over their own life.
Rocky and Adrian had watched the argument go down awkwardly. Later, when they returned to their home, Adrian had apologized on behalf of their family, to which Rocky had just waved off.
Then Adrian had asked, “What does Rocky think, question?”
Rocky knew what his mate was asking, but decided to, as Grace would call it, beat around the bush.
“What does Rocky think about what, question?” He had replied, settling into a cozy spot in preparation for what may be a long conversation.
“Crystemesis,” Adrian had replied, getting right to the point as they settled down next to Rocky. They were so much larger than Rocky, practically dwarfing him in size. It was nice lying next to each other. It made Rocky feel warm, safe, and protected.“It seems painful,” Rocky had replied honestly. “Sad sad sad for all involved.”
Adrian had hummed in agreement, letting the silence sit for a while as they both collected their thoughts.
“If Rocky had gotten for Adrian, what would Rocky have done, question?” Adrian eventually asked, curious.
“Don’t know. Wouldn’t want to forget Adrian. Would probably just try to woo Adrian even better.”
Adrian chittered out a deep, endearing chuckle that sent a warm shiver through Rocky. They both were always able to look back in amusement at their courting period and how adamant Rocky had been to catch the eye of the beautiful Eridian that towered over him. Adrian had had their fair share of suitors, but none were as enthusiastic and persistent as Rocky was. What Rocky would have done to try to win Adrian even more, Adrian could not fathom without letting out a few chuckles.
“Grateful that Rocky chose Adrian as mate,” Adrian purred. “Thank Rocky for waiting for Adrian. If reversed now, Adrian would wait for Rocky, too.”
Rocky had lingered on the memory, feeling guilty for doubting Adrian for even a moment. He found himself more and more often rubbing the inlaid gemstones on one of his appendages that made up his and Adrian’s mating mark as a method of self-soothing. Rocky must have been doing it often enough for even Grace to pick up on it.
“You must really miss your mate, huh?” Grace had asked at random one day, making Rocky realize he had zoned out and was stroking the familiar gemstones subconsciously.
Rocky had let out a sound of agreement, nodding his carapace too for Grace’s benefit. So much of humans’ way of communicating included physical movements, causing Rocky to pick up on some of their peculiarities as well.
“I’m so excited for you to see them again, bud,” Grace had said. “I’m excited to meet them too!”
Rocky pictured it for a moment, Grace meeting his mate back home on Erid. Grace would be slightly taller than Adrian, although it might be a little intimidated at their size since its only exposure to Eridians so far was Rocky, who was admittedly small for an Eridian. Adrian would probably be fascinated by Grace and all its leakiness, wanting to study it and get to know it right away. They would likely present themselves as quite civil, calm, and polite, but would hound Rocky with their burning questions later when they were alone.
For some reason, the idea of Adrian meeting Grace had made Rocky feel strange. Rocky had skittered away for a few moments, having to let out a few ‘coughs’ that were becoming more predictable but remained an annoyance. As Rocky sat there alone (he was never really alone, but Grace had privacy in its waste room and Rocky had privacy in this enclosed corner of his workshop), he imagined other Eridians meeting Grace. He had known that it was extremely likely that once the two of them arrived at Erid, almost everyone would be all over the squishy human. Scientists, linguists, different entity members, and even the average Eridian would want a piece of the alien savior of two planets.
It made Rocky hot all over just thinking about it. All those people looking at Grace, trying to talk to it, study it. It felt wrong wrong wrong. Grace was his. The two of them had a gravitational pull of their own, tying them together. They were written in the stars. How dare anyone think they have a right to even look at Grace?
Rocky knew these thoughts weren’t rational. But he had long let go of logic when it came to Grace. Instead of dissecting it, he did what he found himself doing more frequently when it came to Grace-related matters and just ignored it. Instead, he decided to relish the days he had Grace all to himself on the trip home to Erid. Inside the Hail Mary, Grace was Rocky’s. Just the two of them.
By the time they had arrived to Erid, Rocky’s condition had worsened slightly. The growing crystallized mass inside him remained mainly uncomfortable, only occasionally causing him pain that was completely manageable. Grace had started to pick up on the little hisses of air Rocky was letting out, yet Rocky had brushed it off and assured Grace it was nothing to worry about. Not that it took much to fool Grace. It had been practically bedridden in the final stretch to Erid, likely too out of it to question anything thoroughly.
The first few hours of Rocky’s return to Erid were filled with explanations and orders surrounding the taumoeba, but more importantly, Grace. Rocky didn’t like that Grace was still up on the Hail Mary, alone for the first time in years now that Rocky was gone. Rocky wanted his human safe on the ground, safe on Rocky’s home planet, as soon as possible. So if that meant reiterating how fragile Grace was, or how important it was to quickly synthesize some food for him to eat, or to ensure there was somewhere safe for him to breathe, then Rocky did it. Only after multiple Eridians promised Rocky several times that they were working as quickly as they could to make a plan to get Grace down and solve any medical and nutritional needs, Rocky allowed himself to be looked over for any injuries.
Unlike Grace, Rocky’s foolish space blob, the doctors weren't as easily fooled.
“Higher than average internal temperature,” the main doctor noted as they circled through the different medical equipment that was sitting on a nearby tray. “Lowered water cell count.”
Rocky had fidgeted nervously. Would they be able to tell? He still wasn’t ready to talk to Adrian about it. He had no idea what he was going to say to Grace, either. The thought of someone informing one of them before Rocky could was awful.
The examination had been going well, finding some expected but treatable injuries. The doctor had noted that his seal had strangely seemed a little swollen. Rocky figured it was likely from the uncontrollable, automatic reaction of it constantly opening.
Otherwise, Rocky thought he’d make it through safely. Then, halfway through the examination, Rocky had let out a cough with the damning, familiar hissing sound.
The doctor had jumped a little due to the unexpected noise, but then clacked a few of their fingers together in excitement. “Well, that explains the other symptoms!” They exclaimed.
The doctor then tapped around Rocky’s carapace, trying to get a clear look at the growth. Rocky was a little uncomfortable, both at someone knowing something so intimate and private without his planning to tell them, but also at how closely the doctor was basically looking inside him. He figured the growth couldn’t be too big, since he was still in the early, early stages. Rocky had time to figure out what he was going to do.
Those assumptions were based on the fact that usually the illness was very slow going, taking around a human decade to enter the late stages. Usually. There was nothing usual about an Eridian falling in love with a human.
“Beginning of the middle stage,” the doctor had declared, stepping back. Rocky slumped a little, mainly in surprise and shock. His symptoms had only started a couple of human months ago. It made no sense that what usually took five years instead took a few months. Why was it progressing so fast?
“Recommend Rocky take care of it or plan to have surgery soon,” the doctor said after a few seconds of silence. Rocky had let out an enraged noise, causing the doctor to step back nervously at the sudden outburst.
“You dare!” Rocky had hissed, surprising even himself at the outrage in his tone. “Rocky will not forget. Do not say again.”
The doctor let out a nervous hum, but didn’t say anything else, afraid of upsetting Rocky any further. Rocky was cleared to spend a few more days in quarantine before release, albeit with a note of ‘Middle stage Crystemesis’ on his file.
Rocky was avoiding Adrian.
Adrian had been so happy to see him. They had wept in the way Eridians do, in low, heartbreaking whines, when they finally saw Rocky for the first time since he had left. Rocky had been similarly emotional and affected, bumping into Adrian’s carapace enthusiastically. Rocky desperately wanted to hug them, but he didn’t want to overwhelm them with something so strange and new upon their reunion. It could wait.
As the two had talked, holding each other close, Rocky wondered how to tell Adrian he was literally lovesick. How, even though he just returned to Adrian, they might lose him all over again very soon. This time for good.
Adrian, despite it having been years and years apart, could still read Rocky so well. It was almost infuriating how quickly they had picked up that something was eating away at Rocky. But even worse, they didn’t push for Rocky to tell them. They told Rocky they would wait. That they had already waited, and would wait more, however long Rocky needed. Adrian said they would not leave and would remain steadfast by his side.
It made Rocky feel terrible. He would almost prefer Adrian to be angry, to question who Grace was and why Rocky was so attached. To hold it over Rocky, saying ‘I told you so, I begged you not to go!’ because now Rocky has returned different and changed. Broken. Rocky was not the same mate Adrian had chosen all those years ago. It felt like another deception on top of the lovesickness.
But whenever he needed to return home, Adrian would be there. Adrian would hold him, and Rocky was weak. He had missed their touch, touch in general, but especially theirs. He couldn’t push Adrian away, but he also couldn’t tell the truth, the words feeling like a death sentence. It wasn’t fair to Adrian. It was selfish.
But Adrian stayed, and the strange atmosphere that had developed between them continued. Lovers reunited after years separated, but never feeling further apart.
It was easier to pretend nothing was wrong and avoid that damn tension. Avoiding Adrian wasn’t that difficult, not with all the things that needed tending to. It turns out being the only survivor of an intergalactic space trip kept you busy. As well as taking care of your human and doing whatever you could to make it comfortable.
Rocky had found being away from Grace was very similar to missing a limb. Sometimes he would forget Grace wasn’t there, and would say something and wait for Grace to respond until remembering he now lived in the mini biodome at the heart of the science institute. It would ache when they were separated for too long. Even with all of Rocky’s other responsibilities, he was with Grace as much as he could be.
Grace didn’t seem to mind. It actually seemed over dramatically thrilled every time Rocky visited. Like it didn’t think Rocky would come back for it. Rocky wondered why human brains could be so dumb and complicated.
“I should get some Eridian friends,” it said one day out of nowhere when they’d both been sitting there quietly, enjoying each other’s company.
“Rocky not enough, question?” Rocky said immediately, sounding bitter even to his ears.
Grace had shaken its head rapidly. “No, not what I mean. Just feel bad Rocky is here so often. I get lonely and appreciate the company,” it let out a sigh and ran its fingers through its hair, choosing its words carefully. “I just feel guilty. Like, don’t you have friends and family you want to see and visit? Things you want to go and do now that you’re back on Erid?”
If Rocky could sigh, he would.
“Already spend plenty of time away from Grace. Rocky likes being with Grace. Where Grace is, Rocky wants to be.”
Grace smiled, its singular heart pumping a little faster. It seemed quite pleased by Rocky’s words.
“Rocky best company for Grace than any other Eridian anyway,” Rocky added brattily.
“Hmm, I should still try to make friends. Having friends is healthy for humans.”
Rocky stomped one of his claws in annoyance but said nothing. He didn’t like the idea of Grace making new, potentially better friends. That they would have less time together. That it would seek someone else out, instead of Rocky. But Rocky knew what Grace said was true. Humans were social creatures and needed a network of relationships to be healthy. So he’d bear it for Grace.
Grace let out a little laugh at Rocky, for some reason finding amusement at his anger. But then it scooted over and hugged Rocky’s ball. Instinctively, Rocky leaned against the xenonite barrier to be closer to Grace.
It wasn’t close enough.
Because Grace was leaning against the ball, its next words literally vibrated through Rocky’s body, making them much more intense.
“Don’t worry. You’ll always be my favorite.”
Rocky shuddered at the words. The pressure inside him was suddenly intense, stronger than it had ever been before. It felt like he was going to explode, like something much stronger than just air displacement was happening.
It hurt hurt hurt. He let out a strangled squeal of pain, collapsing slightly as his limbs suddenly struggled to hold his weight due to everything hurting so damn much.
Rocky was barely able to process Grace’s words, just that the human was panicking. It got louder and louder until it was screaming, which definitely wasn’t helping the whole situation.
Rocky’s seal opened with a concerning popping noise. Rocky braced himself, instinctively lying on his side. It felt like he was being gutted. Like the predators that used to hunt Eridians had caught Rocky, pried open his seal to his soft insides, and were shredding it apart with sharp claws to feast.
It was agonizing. In what felt like minutes but was likely only a couple of seconds, something fell out of Rocky’s open hole, hitting the bottom of the xenonite ball with a clink. It was a small crystal, barely the size of a pebble’s little fist.
The panic and pain quickly drained out of Rocky, leaving him feeling disoriented as his senses came back to him. The bottom of the xenonite ball was covered in dripping hot mercury. Grace was still by him, breathing fast. Rocky recognized it as a ‘panic attack’. Grace had its fair share of them on the Hail Mary, as it had recovered some particularly traumatic memories.
“Grace must calm,” Rocky said weakly, realizing his speaking chords were sore from his yelling out so loudly in pain. He tapped the panel closest to Grace. Grace was finally getting stabilized and returning to full health. It shouldn’t undo all its hard work and progress to get better.
“Rocky! You’re talking. Tell me what’s wrong! Are you okay? The medical team should be here any second!” Its speech was rushed and frantic, going so quickly that Rocky had trouble comprehending it in his dazed state.
Rocky looked down at the crystal that had come out of him. The crystal that represented his ardent love for Grace. The very creature that was just inches away, falling apart at how Rocky was hurt.
Ironically, it seemed quite pretty. Rocky wondered what color it looked like to Grace. Maybe Rocky would keep it, make some jewelry out of it to give to the human.
The doctors arrived, and multiple parties quickly collaborated to get Rocky to the airlock. Rocky’s ball was rolled over to the Eridian entrance. As soon as the adhesive connected, multiple limbs grabbed his tired body and dragged him out onto a rolling stretcher that moved sick Eridians.
Grace was so distressed, sobbing as Rocky was pulled away and out of its human sight. It was leaking so much, making pebble-like sounds of distress that made all of Rocky’s five hearts clench. Rocky weakly protested, asking to be examined near Grace’s enclosure. He didn’t want to be too far from it when it was so upset. The doctors pushed back against Rocky’s words, saying it would be much better to look him over at the medical wing. Rocky could still see Grace as he got rolled away. He watched it until it was too far out of range.
Rocky heard Adrian long before they started talking to Rocky, their large, clunky form recognizable and loud at the speed they had run. Rocky numbly responded to Adrian, who was also quite freaked out.
“Rocky hurt, question? What happening, question?”
Rocky didn’t want to answer. But there really wasn’t any point hiding it. There was physical proof back in Grace’s airlock. Anyone who tapped Rocky with the intention of looking inside would see the growth now. They were also getting mighty close to the examination room where the doctors would likely tell them what Rocky already knew. It was better coming from him.
“Sick,” Rocky trilled slowly, his tone filled with anguish. “Crystemesis.”
Adrian nearly froze, their quick steps faltering alongside the fast-moving stretcher. Despite all of Erid always thrumming with noise and sound, it seemed tensely quiet for a few seconds. Adrian shook themselves, like they were pulling themself out of intense thought.
“Make sense. For Grace, question?” Adrian said, like the amazing mate they were.
If Rocky could cry, he would. Adrian wasn’t mad. Adrian’s first reaction wasn’t calling him foolish or full of fear, begging Rocky to get the surgery. They didn’t want to leave. They didn’t even seem shocked. They just took it in stride, like some part of them already knew.
“Adrian too good for me,” Rocky wheezed emotionally instead of answering the question. Adrian let out a frustrated puff of air.
“Adrian just perfect for Rocky,” they said sternly, leaving no room for argument. “Rocky perfect for Adrian.”
Later, the doctors confirmed what Rocky already knew. He was now nearing the final stage of Crystemesis in which his insides began to crystallize. Eridians were able to expel crystal fragments that chipped off in a similar way to how Rocky had done earlier. The fragment sizes would likely only increase in size and intensity.
“Why happen so quickly?” Adrian thumped their foot down loudly in agitation. “Not usually so quick.”
The doctor seemed a little nervous, clicking their claws. “Rocky told about radiation. Big big big damage to cells and body. Make changes. Maybe reason for why so sick so fast.”
Rocky figured that made sense. There was that answered.
“How much time?” Adrian pressed again. Rocky could hear his mate’s hearts thumping fast in anxiety. Oh, why did he have to be a fool and fall in love with an alien of all things that could never love him back and put his wonderful mate through this?
Not that Rocky regretted his love. It was Grace. Anything but loving Grace was impossible.
“Do not know. Few months. Would heal with surgery or reciprocation,” the doctor answered, drawing a small distressed squeak from Adrian.
“No surgery,” Rocky said firmly, talking for the first time in the entire conversation.
“No surgery,” Adrian repeated sadly, agreeing with Rocky’s decision. Their claw found his, needing to touch for a moment.
“Reciprocation?” Chirped the doctor, likely invested in saving the life of one of Erid’s saviors.
Rocky shook his carapace before realizing the doctor wouldn’t know what it meant. “Not possible,” he replied.
Adrian let out a small hum of disagreement.
“Possible,” Adrian argued.
“Grace love Rocky,” Rocky trilled sadly. “But not how Rocky love Grace. Not the way Rocky need to get better.”
Adrian moved in a way that told Rocky they were annoyed.
“Will talk about Grace Rocky later. At home, statement.”
Rocky didn’t really see the point of dragging out a conversation that had one conclusion, but he’d do anything for his mate at this point. If Adrian wanted to talk, they’d talk.
The doctor then made himself scarce as the two collected themselves to return home, but not before declaring that Rocky would need a full sleep cycle of rest before returning to visit human Grace. It had put an even larger damper on Rocky’s mood.
He thought about how he had left Grace, the human basically in the middle of a breakdown. If Rocky were any less weak, he’d throw a tantrum and go see it no matter what anyone said. Yet Rocky could feel the tiredness weighing his body down. He really did need to sleep.
He’d have to visit it as soon as he woke up. Grace would be okay until then. It had to be.