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Section I- An Angel From The Ashes
The first time Hu Tao met the law student was under less than ideal circumstances. It had been during a difficult period of her life - her grandfather had just passed and he brought with him all the safety and comfort of home that Hu Tao had taken for granted at her young age.
Under the dim coverage of dusk, Hu Tao sat on the forest moss outside her grandfather’s house on Wuwang Hill. Tears were streaming down her face as she stared at the empty scenery around her. Crickets and fireflies huddled in groups, travelling together in the night for safety. Family units, Hu Tao thought angrily. Her parents had long since left her behind, and now her grandfather just had to leave her too. Learning funeral rites at a young age did not make burying- at least what was- her only remaining own relative any easier.
Without any family left, Wangwu Hill was eerily quiet. Things that used to fascinate Hu Tao, insects she used to poke and prod at, seemed to have grown larger than before. But Hu Tao wasn’t scared, no, she was already 16, basically an adult. She would care for herself. She doesn’t need her grandfather. She doesn’t need people who didn’t love her enough to live. Hu Tao hastily wipes the wetness on her cheeks, which is sweat from the humidity in Liyue- she was not crying. Looking up to the night sky, she glared at the sight of the moon. Why the universe decided that she deserved such a situation was beyond her. The more she pondered on the fate and destiny her grandfather constantly went on and on about, the more the rage sunk into her chest.
Her hands gripped her lighter enough for it to cut into her skin. But she paid it no mind, focusing instead on how to get back at the universe for this injustice. She shot to her feet, stumbling and her vision unclear with the hastiness of her movements. Wiping her eyes as she stared hard at the forest around her.
She threw the remaining stick into her pile, and dropped her open lighter into it. Watching as the flame burst forth to engulf the wood. The fire grew in height, its vibrant colour contrasting to the previous dark and lonely atmosphere. It was as if the heat and fumes from the smoke cloaked her in an embrace. A bright future to avenge the wrongdoings that the universe had wrought upon her. But it wasn’t enough, the flames did grow in height, but the wetness of the forest moss kept the fire at bay. And as it slowly started to simmer down, Hu Tao felt a surge of resentment wash through her. The frustration was overbearing.
So she took a second lighter out of her pocket, opened it, and…hesitated. But what did it matter if her grandfather’s house burnt down? There’s nothing left in there. What meaning is there to keep her grandfather’s things if her grandfather was not there? No amount of items is enough to replace or make up for the hurt of leaving her. Closing her eyes, and whispering a last prayer, she let the lighter drop onto the wooden mansion. Fire spread much faster than the first, and consumed the entire house in minutes. Hu Tao sighed as she watched, a bubble of regret started to form at the base of her gut, until she realised in a panic that she would not have anything left to remember him by.
In a scream of panic, she hurled herself back into the burning house. Nothing was visible anymore, only colours of orange burned into her pupils as she searched for anything- anything to commemorate her grandfather’s legacy. Her hands grazed a hot yet soft material - his hat. She grabbed it, and ran in the direction she came from.
The smoke was suffocating in her lungs, and the heat was singing in her joints. Adrenaline rushed through her veins and she burst through the burning front door, tumbling down the stairs as the smoke completely consumed her lungs. She was coughing non stop, crying for help.
And help appeared in a halo of pink hair, pale hands reaching out to graze the burnt skin on her face. Emerald eyes shining above her, and the angel bent down to inspect her wounds.
That was the only moment Hu Tao could recall despite being conscious the whole time. Her only thought was on the angel that had shown her kindness at her lowest. Perhaps the universe was not targeting her - no of course, after all she was not the one who died. She was alive. Completely alive. And the angel had come to bring salvation.
The angel’s name was Yanfei, apparently taking the form of a girl the same age as Hu Tao herself. She had come to visit her in the hospital with her parents, bringing pink and yellow chrysanthemums with her. The angel Yanfei had bent down to look at her with worried eyes and a kind sympathetic smile. She had brushed back the sticky hair off her face and placed a single flower in Hu Tao’s bandaged hand.
Hu Tao was positive that Yanfei was not human, because the graze of her pale hand on her burnt cheek did not bring the pain she had expected. Instead, Hu Tao only felt the warmth of being cared for burning in her chest. The feeling of love. Of course, no earthly being could love someone as troubled as Hu Tao. Only an angel could. And an angel does. And the angel whispered to her in that moment, mumbling words about how she’d been on a walk with her parents when she saw the fire in the distance. And remembered that Mr Hu lived there and immediately rushed to help. Excuses, Hu Tao mused. Her angel was looking out of her.
Midnight settled, visible through the glass of the hospital window, and the moon shone a wonderfully bright ray of light onto the pink chrysanthemum in Hu Tao’s hand. She brings it to her nose, breathing in the floral smell and sighs. Her gaze unfocused as she stares longingly at the ceiling. The faint image of an angel smiles above her, its wispy hands outreached to caress her face and whisper “the day has come”.
There is once again a being in this world that loves her. And so, Hu Tao would live and thrive. The universe wants her here, and Yanfei’s shining sincerity as she spoke was proof. She whispers to the angelic girl on her ceiling-
“One day, I’ll find you again. Those who are fated to be in love, won’t ever suffer without the other”. Hu Tao took the girl’s smile as confirmation and nodded off to sleep.
At the doorway, the nurse stood still gazing worriedly at the patient on the bed. She had been speaking to herself for the past hour, smiling joyfully at the bare ceiling as if it were alive.
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Section II
The next day, her angel was back and bearing gifts.
The skies of Liyue Harbour were nothing short of grey. Crowded with thick grey storm clouds looming over the hospital. The unpleasant mood was thankfully short lasting. Hu Tao had just been wondering gloomily if she had imagined the angel from yesterday, when a comforting presence walked through the door and Hu Tao almost broke her neck turning her head in desperation.
It was as if the clouds had parted and the heavens sung directly into her soul. As cheesy as it sounds, Hu Tao could not describe the inextricable feeling of pure safety that she felt in that moment. Her fears and worries melted away in an instant when those soft emerald eyes turned to look at her gently. Yanfei, the ‘girl’ from yesterday, was walking toward her and Hu Tao tried very hard not to fall to her knees at that moment. The relief was overwhelming. She had to hold back tears so as to not alarm the others, obviously she’s not concerned Yanfei would be upset by her tears. Her angel knows her better than anyone else, her soulmate, her guardian, and her love. No, Yanfei would understand completely. She feels her heart thump happily at the short lived daydream of Yanfei ushering everyone out if Hu Tao did cry and cause a scene. Because she knows Yanfei knows her heart better than everyone else.
Her eyes refocused onto the girl in front of her when pale hands reached out to cup her own. The warmth emitting from the other’s embrace was igniting all the vessels in Hu Tao’s body as Hu Tao blissfully - and selfishly - clings to every moment they’re connected. She breathes deeply, taking in the scent of silk flowers on the other girl, and moves her hands upward to cup the other’s cheeks. Taking the cherubic face into her hands, she smiles at Yanfei, and tells Yanfei with her eyes that they’re fated to be together. That there’s nothing in the world that can ever separate them now that they’ve found each other, and that she knows the aroma of silk flowers on Yanfei is a clear indication of her affection since silks flowers are Hu Tao’s favourite flower and that Hu Tao had been dreaming of her all night and could hardly believe that she’s finally found her. That she’s unbelievably happy that she finally has someone who loves her again.
To this, Yanfei smiles back. Hu Tao breathes a sigh of relief. For a second there Hu Tao was concerned that Yanfei wouldn't understand everything that Hu Tao just communicated to her non verbally, but of course Yanfei would - they’re meant for each other. Hu Tao takes in the curvature of those smiling eyes framed with the longest lashes she’d ever seen on a person. The light blush on her cheeks - ah yes of course. Yanfei is telling her that she understood everything Hu Tao had told her and that she feels the same way. Why else would she be blushing if not to communicate that she is being sincere and vulnerable with her true feelings? No, Hu Tao must confirm to Yanfei that she understands the other’s soul just as much as the other understands her’s. So Hu Tao reaches down to gently take Yanfei’s wrists into her arms.
“Don’t worry, love. I understand your every sentiment” Hu Tao whispers in her ear.
The nurse coming in pauses momentarily in confusion as the pink hair girl from yesterday suddenly took a quick step back in shock. With the shorter of the two girls gripping the former’s wrists in a fashion that looks uncomfortably tight. The nurse sets down her things. She ought to give a gentle reminder to the patient to watch her behaviour. She must’ve been traumatised by yesterday, and the Yan girl is sweet, saving a girl she’s never met before and having such empathy to have brought the poor girl flowers and gifts. So as gently as she can, she says-
“Hu Tao, dear, let go of Yanfei, would you? The poor girl looks a little startled. Come have some food, it’s breakfast time.” The nurse, a woman Hu Tao doesn’t even recognise, snarls at her. Her biting sarcasm poisons the words she throws at the two girls. Hu Tao looks at Yanfei now, properly, and realises angrily that the poor angel had been startled by the nurse’s words. She’s now a step back from Hu Tao, though she hadn’t removed her wrists from Hu Tao so obviously Hu Tao was not the problem. Which means that that nasty brutish woman of 40 had the audacity to scare her soulmate. Rage flushed through Hu Tao as she threw herself in front of Yanfei, protecting her from the horrible nurse’s gaze.
“Just who do you think you are?! To be intervening in our conversation?” Hu Tao-
Screamed, caging the girl behind her with her body and the wall behind them. The nurse quickly moves to help Yanfei, the poor girl frightened at this display of unadulterated aggression. She quickly calls for backup, while slowly moving towards Hu Tao and Yanfei.
She was going to attack. Hu Tao pushes the two of them further into the corner of the room and clenches her fist. She moves her feet, spreading them with one angled slightly behind the other in preparation to defend Yanfei at all costs. Hu Tao would do anything for Yanfei, and her angel needs her right now. This, this is her moment to repay her angel for the kindness she’s shown her. Her life thus far has amounted to this moment. So Hu Tao grits her teeth in determination and whispers to Yanfei the most comforting words she can muster in this moment. Promising to protect her for an eternity from any harm that may come their way.
This is not a good sign. The patient is muttering gibberish to herself, hopefully the psychologist is open for an emergency appointment. The nurse raises her eyes to nod at Yanfei, and then takes one final step forwards,
“Hu Tao, let Yanfei go now.” She asserts.
Hu Tao could laugh if she wasn’t so tense. Let her go? The woman doubts her commitment to Yanfei. She’ll show her just how wrong she is on this front. But before this moment, there’s one last thing she has to do. She takes the hat off of her head, the soft fabric worn from years of residence on her grandfather’s head, and places the hat on Yanfei.
“Take care of it for me? I trust you.” She smiles at the pink haired girl, before turning back at the woman who has paused to observe the scene. Hah, a moment of hesitation. Only a fool would leave such an opening. For Yanfei, for her angel, Hu Tao whispers to herself before leaping straight at the nurse.
Thin hands grip the older woman’s throat in a chokehold. The nurse frantically tries to pull the girl off her, until finally security rushes in the room to hold Hu Tao down. They quickly sedate her, deeming it the safest option for now. The nurse coughs, taking a few deep breaths before walking to the girl cowered in the corner.
Yanfei looks up, mutters a tearful “thank you” and rushes out to her parents. Obviously frightened from this encounter, poor girl. The nurse looks at the young girl now asleep on her hospital bed and sighs. The doctor walks in to check her vitals, alongside a child psychologist. It was good they were able to find one available.
The psychologist looks at the nurse. “Please go and find someone to call a social worker, the girl will need to be transferred to an orphanage once she’s released from the hospital.”
Having heard how wonderful the Hu family was through her brother, the nurse casts one last sympathetic glance at the girl on the bed and wishes her well, before taking her leave and closing the door shut behind her.