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Push. Push. Left, push. Turn. The girl’s wheelchair crunches along the path. As Holly pushes her wheels, she looks up through the trees. They sway in the light breeze, letting small rays of warm sun down onto the ground. She feels the golden light shift on her legs, despite not being able to use them. Holly’s legs sit still, only moving when she’s hit the occasional rock or pebble. Of course, that’s bound to happen here. The air smells of flowers and mud, but in the best way, on this trail. Holly comes here to the forest every week, to clear her head. Today’s cause is… she’d rather not talk about it. She is miles away in her head when something snaps her out of it. The asphalt trail ahead lights up, accompanied by a mechanical wheezing sound.
The sound fades in, and out, as if it were breathing. Abruptly, it ends. She reaches down and starts to push forward, still listening for more noises. Crunch, crunch. Soon she is met with the sight of a 1930’s police box. Its base is part way on the path, but mostly in the grass. ‘No way! A real TARDIS! This would be a great two truths and a lie story,’ she notes, not exactly planning to tell this tale, but still regarding the possibility. Before she can bolt into the police box, a thought pulls at her attention. There are people at home waiting for her. It nags, and whines, trying to make her stay. Like a child at an arcade begging for five more minutes. She weighs her decisions, albeit hastily, as she might not have much time. ‘Would Gabby care if I left? Maybe. Would I care that she cares? No.’ Maybe Holly can be a bit spiteful, especially against her foster mother, Gabby, but this was different. She couldn’t miss this opportunity. This was her one chance to get a break from the same old town where nothing happens, and yet where everything went wrong. So she maneuvers closer to the TARDIS’s wonderfully blue doors, and with a nudge, it opens. As she pushes the door farther, it creaks a bit. ‘My wheelchair could never. She’s well taken care of,’ Holly scoffs, glancing briefly at her front wheels. She turns to face the doors head on, before leaning back into a wheelie. With a thrust, she enters the police box.
To her surprise, the inside is impossibly large. Holly had loved to watch ‘Doctor Who’ with her dad prior to his passing, and always joyfully anticipated the way the TARDIS would change with the main character, The Doctor, but now it seemed almost breathtaking. Her eyes glittered from the caramel colored lighting, and yet also from the thought of the one thing that brought Holly and her deceased father together. It was overwhelming. Her favorite show had come to life, but her dad wasn’t there to see it with her. Holly blinked away the tears clouding her vision and steeled herself, determined to hide any and all of these feelings from the doctor. If he was even here.
Holly decides to search through the warmly lit console room for a sign of the doctor. A forgotten gadget or tool, a corner of his trench coat, a glimpse of his permanently messy hair. She slowly begins to wheel forward, the grates under her rattling as she advances. Without warning, the doors close behind her. She rotates to look towards the exit as the familiar wheezing sound comes again. Holly knows what this means. She is now traveling through space and time. After all, that is what TARDIS stands for; Time And Relative Dimension In Space. She returns to scanning for the doctor, but her hunt is cut short when the walls around her shudder. She assumes they've landed now, and Holly won't have to look any further.
Through the nearby hallway, footsteps can be heard. The room and sounds are all too real. She is going to meet The Doctor, and the tenth regeneration by the looks of her surroundings. She takes a moment to prepare herself, smoothing out her cherry colored skirt and lavender sweater.
Finally, he emerges from the endless halls of the TARDIS. He walks calmly, yet energized and it’s somewhat hypnotizing. Holly sits, just watching. It seems surreal to have The Doctor in front of her. He blends in with the interior, wearing a brown pinstriped suit and trench coat overtop. As he comes closer, he notices what has snuck onto his ship.
Holly takes a deep breath, but before she can speak, The Doctor pulls a cylindrical object out of his pocket and aims it at Holly. It’s only about the size of a pen and very similar in form, but the glowing tip and the buzz it emits makes it a bit more menacing. Luckily, she knows what this is. A sonic screwdriver. While circling, he launches into questions like “What species are you?” and, “This better not be a repeat of Donna.” Holly doesn’t know a Donna, but she assumes this has happened before. Once he’s confirmed that she’s human, he restores the screwdriver to his coat’s inner pocket. He softens a bit, realizing how young Holly is. But how young is she? The doctor thinks a moment before asking, “How old are you?”
“I’m fifteen. Well, sixteen in July.”
“What’s your name?”
“Holly Fellston.”
“Oh, like Ji-” he hesitates and adds, “wrong time, you wouldn’t know him.”
Holly cocks her head and soon realizes what he means. The doctor walks over to the console in the middle of the room and starts flipping some switches. The console is round and ironically, it reminds her of a stereotypical flying saucer. In the middle of it protrudes a large glass tube containing what Holly knows to be some sort of piston. It's about the same size as The Doctor and reaches up to the ceiling. He looks back at Holly and inquires where she lives. She is getting tired of questions but still answers, “Sun Prairie, Wisconsin.” She then puts two and two together and specifies, “You’re not taking me back are you? I want to come with you, wherever you’re going.”
“Of course I am,” The Doctor says, matter of factly. “I can’t bring a teenager with me on Mars! It’s irresponsible. I don't even know you!” He smiles slightly, as if he’s amused at the mere thought of allowing her to trail along. Holly’s almond skin blushes out of embarrassment. “I'm not some dumb teen. I can take care of myself, if that’s what you’re worried about. ” Holly says.
“Oh, I bet you could on earth, but Mars is much different, you see-”
“I’m coming with you no matter what,” Holly interjects anxiously, “I can’t go home. Just give me one day. I’ll be careful, promise. Whatever you want but I… I need this. Please?”
The Doctor seems to consider it, although there’s something in his eyes she can’t really recognize. He appears reluctant, but ultimately mutters, “Fine.”
What’s in The Doctor’s eyes is lonelyness. He needs company as much as Holly needs to get away from Sun Prairie. Being a Time Lord, a creature that lives for thousands of years, could wear on a person, and it was no different than the Doctor’s long, long life. A life of loving and losing one after the other, for centuries on end, but he supposes, ‘how else can life go?’ He aches for companionship, deeply and incessantly, so he lets go, and chooses to take a chance on Holly.
He steps away from the console. His coat ripples behind him as he approaches Holly. The Doctor smiles, and Holly reciprocates. She grabs hold of her wheels and rolls toward the TARDIS doors.
The ground is cold to the touch, and yet the warmest color Holly’s ever seen. As the two of them get farther from the TARDIS a large city comes into view. They tread the dusty surface for a short time before reaching Holly’s first contact with civilization.
A large billboard stands in front of them recommending what Holly thinks is a lawyer. The text blurs and jitters until it unexpectedly becomes readable. The alien on the billboard says, “Need protection? Call Bridlor, greatest lawyer in Northern Mars.” It’s written in big blocky letters but Holly doesn’t have time to acknowledge the choice as The Doctor proceeds to explain. “The TARDIS automatically translates almost all languages to one you understand. Brilliant, eh?” he says. Holly nods her head and continues to take in the great skyline before them. The buildings are huge and colorful, bursting with life. They only get bigger as the pair enters Mars’ greatest city.
The Doctor leads Holly through the red-orange streets, occasionally mentioning facts and stories. Midway through a tale involving donut holes and a shoe shiner, Holly interrupts to ask The Doctor what he’s here for. He answers patiently that he’s here to pick up a special material he needs for his TARDIS. “I’ve got a mate here, Chapman, best salesman in the city. Although, he’s been known to raise prices for…” and Holly stopped listening. Now that she's got her answer, she’s consumed with looking at the flashy buildings around her, each one showing strange products and services. She can’t imagine what anyone could need these things for, but she keeps an open mind. Afterall, she doesn’t want to trash her first trip to another planet by being a Negative Nancy. The lights pass by as The Doctor and Holly cross into a more seedy area.
“I’m sorry about the scene change, but this is just where Chapman works” He apologizes.
Holly replies quickly, “Nah, it’s alright. I asked to come with.”
“If you’re sure. Now, I’ll try to be quick, but as I said, Chapman likes to charge more, so there could be some haggling involved.”
“Oh, cool. I’m great at haggling.” Holly says, hoping it doesn’t sound like she’s bragging.
Pretty soon, they arrive at Chapman’s stall, looking strangely normal for a place that distributes “special materials”. The Doctor picks up an item and examines it. Holly takes a quick one over and decides she’d rather continue to admire the city around her. She turns her head and sees a man strolling across the street, his hands in the pockets of his black jeans. Holly gasps. Aside from his green-ish complexion, the man looks exactly like her dad.
All at once, she is transported back to October the year before. Holly can’t remember the day, nor does she want to. She sat in her father’s Toyota, bobbing her leg. She had tended to do that when she was nervous. Holly sat in silence as her dad, Gabe, drove. After a few minutes had passed, he said, “Holly, listen, I just want what’s best for you.” ‘Wrong move’, she thought.
“No, you don’t, dad.” Holly said.
“I know you think I’m being a control freak, but when you look back at this, maybe you’ll realize…” He trailed off.
“Realize what? Realize that you’re always right? Realize that I’m only allowed to do what you want me to?”
“Holly, it’s not like that. Colin just isn’t right for you.”
She knew she should never have come to him with this. Holly had just entered a relationship with Collin Briggs, and wanted advice from her dad. She’d tried a year before, thought she really liked the guy, but her dad wouldn’t have it. Holly knew the risks, but she thought maybe since she was older, he could be better about it. No. That’s not what happened. He blew up, lecturing Holly on how teenage boys can be, as if she didn’t already know. He didn’t listen, and she wasn’t sure he ever would.
“I wish you weren’t my dad.”
As Holly snaps out of her sudden remembering she looks out at the dirt path. It’s still the same beautiful sunset red, reminding her where she is. What’s strange though, is that it’s moving. ‘No’, she thinks. She’s moving. Someone is pushing Holly’s chair. She looks out behind her and cries, “I need help! Doctor!” hoping to catch the attention of The Doctor, but he appears to be deep in negotiations with Chapman. She takes it upon herself to stop her wheels, but the kidnapper takes note and lifts her and her chair up to prevent interference. “Put me down!” Holly shouts, turning to meet her abductor’s gaze.
“I don't know what you want from me, but I’m sure we could talk about it instead of…” Holly is shocked. The figure taking her away wears a mask similar to the tragedy mask seen in theater but in place of eyes are a collection of flowers. They are blooming and vibrant, stark in contrast to the figure’s dull blue skin. Holly pries at her kidnappers hands, desperate to make them let go, but there's no such luck.
After a horrible journey of shouting and attempts at freeing herself, Holly is taken to the basement of some nondescript building she suspects might actually be a spaceship in disguise. She’s locked inside a glass cylinder in the middle of some equally nondescript room despite her protests. The walls run from floor to ceiling, flawless and smooth. Through the pristinely clear barrier, she’s finally able to see her abductor’s form, and Holly is marginally disappointed. They wear the addressed mask as well as some minimally embellished armor. Only their hands and head are visible, and they are every bit as plain as the rest. Except for a pair of gorgeous metal bangles, one on each wrist. She assumes they’re well taken care of, as the gold bangles are spotlessly shiny. She reaches out with a small comment, “You guys really like your cleaning, huh?” After an awkward amount of silence, Holly tries to reason with the being in front of her, but she can only hold a one sided conversation for so long.
The Doctor stands at Chapman's stall, still bickering over the fee of his component. He feels someone brush against his shoulder and pivots to find the suspect, but instead discovers Holly’s missing. Without thinking, he replaces the element and says a quick goodbye.
Racing down the dirt roads, The doctor takes out his sonic and scans for signs of alien life. The reading comes back as 100% positive. Tardily, The Doctor registers that the entire planet is alien life. He insults himself. In time, The Doctor repeats the scan, but with signs of human life, and is on his way.
Holly is eventually bored with the unmoving Martians guarding her crystalline enclosure. Inside the glass-walled room, Holly struggles to avoid thoughts of her deceased father. She sits there for fifteen minutes at least, going around the circular space to ward off worries and doubts. She wonders if the doctor will find her, and if he’ll be angry. Unfortunately, Holly’s patterns do not help to protect against her unease. ‘I got myself into this, didn’t I? He should be angry. I’m responsible for this,’ Holly accused. It reminded her of that day in October. A wash of regret drips down her neck and shoulders, transporting her back to that autumn car ride.
Holly’s father swivels his head, trying to understand what she had just uttered. “What did you just say?” he pressed.
“I wish you weren’t my dad,” Holly spoke, a little louder than the previous time. Her dad rotated slowly to face her directly, and began to yell. Hurtful, resentful things came barreling at Holly. She looked away from her fuming father to see the car swerving out of their lane. A semi truck approached, and Holly could do nothing but point out towards it and wail as they struck the eighteen-wheeler.
Holly shifts out of the memory to meet with a view of a new alien. She walks into the basement commanding respect. Holly thinks it’s safe to assume she’s pretty high up in rank. The new alien comes to a stop in front of her clear walls and Holly can feel the extraterrestrial run her eyes over her. The figure waves away the two guards and they swiftly obey. At last, she introduces herself as Hadli. Hadli wears a mask similar to the others, but hers is much more detailed with intricate carvings and hanging jewels. They sway, clinking occasionally, as Hadli explains what her people have stolen Holly for.
“Our leader needs your companion for energy,” a janitor named Rictur explains to The Doctor, “Her excellency says human bodies are full of it.” The Doctor sits in a chair, however large it may be, tied up. The chair was made for Dilephems, but it’s still a nice fit for hostages. He wears a slightly annoyed frown on his face, though it’s not directed towards the Rictur.
The Doctor arrived a few minutes ago, scheming to retrieve Holly, but he was instead caught and held in the janitor's closet. Because he was always a charmer, he managed to coax the kindly man to fill him in on Holly’s abduction.
“Right, so what does this have to do with Holly in specific? Why not anyone else on Mars?”
Rictur looks unsure. “Well, her excellency is an expert on humans, given that she is part human, so if she says they’re good for energy, they’re good for energy!”
“What do you mean, ‘part human’?”
“It’s a long story.”
“I’m a patient man.”
And so Rictur explains the long history of the Dilephems oppressive leader and their revolt against him, led by her excellency, of course. She got to their planet paralysed from the waist down and in return for her help overthrowing the previous man in charge, they used Dilephem’s great medical skill and synthetic tissue to heal her spine. Because they had only ever made Dilephem tissue, that’s all they had to use on her excellency.
“Just to jog my memory, who’s her excellency?”
“Queen Hadli.” Rictur says matter of factly. He then grabs his mop and cleaning cart. “I’ve got to get going now, but if you need anything, just holler!” and with that, he exits the closet. The Doctor sits in the Dilephem sized chair for a very long time even after Rictur’s left, not really doing much on the outside. On the inside though, he’s planning an escape.
Holly sits in a similar manner to The Doctor but for a very different reason. She’s stunned. Her very to-the-point conversation with Hadli explained everything she was there for and what would happen. She will be used for energy to get off Mars. She will die. It is even harder now for her to keep out all the blameful thoughts. They bang and bang and bang in her head, resisting her suppression. Before long she has broken down. Tears build in her eyes and drip down her chin. She feels every one of the angry thoughts as a knot in her gut, threatening to rip her apart completely. ‘I did this. I wrecked it. I asked to come and now I'll never go back home, and they’ll say it was bound to happen. No, they won’t care. You never liked Gabby. She probably hated you anyway. The Doctor will hate you too.’ Holly slams a fist down onto her leg. It doesn’t hurt as much as she wanted it to. ‘I was always irresponsible.’ She hits her leg again. ‘I was always unimportant.’ The thoughts scream inside her ears, her eyes, her mind, and she can't stop them.
Meanwhile, The Doctor shimmies sideways, feeling the rope squeeze his shoulders, close to cutting off circulation. He sits with his left side pushed against the chair back and his right against the cord keeping him there. Not for long. He frees up enough space to reach into his pocket and grab the trusty sonic he needs. With it, he sets the sonic to the torch function and starts to burn through the roping. He is out into the hall in two shakes of a lamb’s tail.
Holly continues to circle the enclosure now that the storm in her head has died down. Now, she’s still terribly anxious, but is no longer hitting herself. She’s painfully aware of how close she is to the process of extracting her energy, but not too sure what to expect. There’s no way it’ll end in sunshine and rainbows. Holly lifts her hand to wipe a half-dried tear.
The door farthest from Holly’s prison inches open to reveal a pair of kind brown eyes. The Doctor's eyes. “Guess who!” he announces.
“Oh my gosh, it’s you! I-I don’t know what to say,” Holly exclaims, but suspends it to look at the closer door swinging agape. In come Hadli and a large group of guards and workers Holly doesn’t recognize. The Doctor is quick to move towards Holly’s glass cage with a reassuring smile. Holly tries to return the grin but can’t, as his presence suddenly incites another wave of sobs. She attempts to squash down her crying. Hadli wordlessly signals the guards to remove The Doctor so she can carry on with the procedure. Unfortunately for her, The Doctor manages to evade capture. He twists out of the Dilephem guard’s large hands, and steps towards Hadli.
“This human is under my protection,” The Doctor says sternly.
Hadli retorts, “Funny, because you weren’t there when Hope or whomever was sealed in that glass room.”
“It doesn’t change the fact that I’m here now. I’m not leaving without Holly.”
Hurriedly, The Doctor removes his sonic screwdriver from a deep trench coat pocket. With a flick and a button push, he uses the screwdriver to emit an incredibly high pitched note. Holly covers her ears, and so do the Dilephem. Over the din, Holly shouts, “Doctor, what are you doing?!”
“I’m saving you!” He answers.
“But how?”
And like magic, Holly’s glass barrier shatters. Shards fall like icicles, rolling in mid-air towards the ground until they fracture further on the concrete floor. Using the sound and surprise as a cover, The Doctor and Holly flee out the door into the stairwell. He locks the door behind them using his screwdriver. Admittedly, with a few grunts, he carries Holly up to safety. Her tears subside enough to ask, “Where were you? What were you doing when I was getting trapped? I waited so long for you, and now you come in like it’s nothing and take me back. You’re not even angry at me! Even though you should be. I ruined your trip.”
“Listen, I was tied up, I got here as fast as I could. And you didn’t ruin it. If anything, you’ve made it exciting. I love a challenge.” He pauses. “You were so brave.” He lays a hand on Holly’s shoulder and squeezes. “Let’s go,” he sighs. As they exit the building, The Doctor throws Holly a soft, but regretful smile.
From behind the door, Hadli listens to Holly’s vent. She waits for them to leave before inserting her key and unlocking the passage. Slowly, she creeps up the steps. Once Hadli makes it to the top, she trails behind Holly and The Doctor.
As the two reach The Doctor’s TARDIS, Holly looks out behind them to take one last glance at the city. As her jaw drops, she tugs at The Doctor’s hand. “The city is gorgeous, isn’t it,” he says.
Holly corrects, “Doctor, no. Look.”
He spins around to see what Holly is so adamant about him witnessing. About seventy-five feet away stands Queen Hadli. She comes forward hesitantly now that she’s been spotted. Holly gathers her courage and yells out, “Why did you follow us? What makes you so desperate to use me?” She’s exasperated, baffled at Hadli’s persistence to use her as fuel. The Doctor paces forward in anticipation. Hadli continues to advance. They stare each other down like their eyes will shoot lasers while waiting for Hadli to respond. When she’s within five feet, The Doctor is fed up with her silence. “Well?” he demands.
Hadli answers, “You’re right. I am desperate. I needed you, Holly, to right our wrongs. You weren’t for energy, but for me to access our timeline to save our dad. I’ve been changed by the Dilephem’s technology, and I'm not fully human anymore. I’m not you anymore. The Dilephem’s system won’t recognize me, but it’ll know you.” She reaches up to grab her ornate mask and takes it off, exposing her face. It’s Holly’s face. They have the same doe eyes, the same almond skin, every part is identical. Despite Hadli’s wrinkles and pale blue patches of coloring, they are unmistakably alike.
“That’s not… It can’t be true! You’re wrong, you have to be,” Holly says.
“But it’s correct. That day in October when we lashed out at Gabe, our dad, we made him crash the car. All I want is to reverse it.”
The Doctor stepped in and said, “But that would produce a paradox. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I can’t let that happen.” He continues to speak, but Holly can’t hear it anymore.
Holly remembers the chilly day in the hospital after she lost her dad. She laid in the bed in her bright white room, still trying to wiggle her toes. She couldn’t. Holly pored over the car crash, thinking of ways to save her dad. She had so many solutions. The only person responsible was her, or at least that’s what Holly thinks. She strained to move just an inch, and all the while loathed herself for the loss that happened.
As Holly slips back into the real world she finds Hadli in a mess of tears, crumpled on the ground next to The Doctor. He has a hand on Hadli’s shoulder. “I need to save him,” she sobs, and Holly can’t help but feel a similar sob rise in her chest. Holly suppresses it and instead helps to comfort Hadli. She’d want the same in the future.
After Hadli has calmed down, Holly and The Doctor help her up and lead her into the TARDIS, although Holly is clueless as to why. Again, the TARDIS wheezes to let the trio know that they’ve departed, and a second time to indicate they’ve arrived. Holly opens the door expecting some other planet to leave her future self on, but sees her favorite woodsy path in its place. She looks back at The Doctor to question him, but it seems like he knows what she’ll say. “You can go home,” he says.
“What? I don't understand.”
“You can go home. There are people who’re waiting for you. They’ll be happy to see you.”
Holly waits for him to say he was joking, but when he doesn't, she has no idea what to say.
“It’s okay. You’ve got a lot to work on. Bye, Holly,” The Doctor says for her.
After a beat, she nods her head and says, “Goodbye, Doctor.”
Holly exits the TARDIS with a wave and moves towards home.
Back on the TARDIS, Hadli looks as confused as her past self. “So… Am I going back or what?”
“Well, If you want to. Or you could come with me.” The Doctor walks over to the console. “We’re not so different you know. We could help each other.”
Hadli jogs up to the console, then hesitates and goes back to the door. She throws her mask out onto the grass and returns to The Doctor’s side. Together, they pull a lever and say goodbye to past Holly’s planet.
~ {-:-} ~