Work Text:
Bum bum BUM bum – bum bum BUM bum – BUM buh bum bum buh buh bum
Mumbo bolted upright, glancing around in confusion and alarm. He had just clicked his bed, pausing in his building to sleep for Bdubs. He should be standing right beside his bed again, safe in his base.
But he wasn’t.
Instead, he stood on a stage, surrounded by vibrant blue and purple lights—screens of some sort?. A podium stood before him, a smaller screen and pen resting atop it, with two identical podiums beside him. Behind the podiums were two other players, but Mumbo couldn’t tell exactly what they looked like; their skins were constantly changing every half-tick, moving between thousands of skins.
Beyond the blue screens, there was only an empty black void, speckled by glowing purple stars, framing the large board made of thirty-six darker blue screens, covered in white and yellow writing. In front of the darker screens stood a tall masculine-presenting player, wearing a crisp grey suit. His hair was short and grey as well, and cheerful but frighteningly intelligent eyes stared directly at Mumbo.
“...This. Is. Jeopardy!”
Mumbo jumped as the loud voice interrupted his thoughts, immediately flinching and turning towards the man in front of him. But the man’s mouth was closed, leaving the echoing voice disembodied.
And the music, the constant, bum bum BUM bum, still ran in the background, causing Mumbo’s heart rate to jump faster than it already was going.
“Introducing today’s contestants: a ∴ᔑℸᓵ⍑ᒷ∷ from ᔑ𝙹3, ᓵ𝙹ᒲᒲᒷリℸᒷ∷; a ꖎ╎ᓭℸᒷリᒷ∷ from ╎∷ꖎ, ⎓∷╎ᒷリ↸; and our returning champion, a Redstoner from HermitCraft, Mumbo Jumbo!
Returning what? Mumbo didn’t know what was going or where he was, how could he possibly be returning here!? Unless they messed with his memory. Oh no, what if they messed with his memory?! Oh dear, oh dear, he was going to have Xisuma rip apart his code as soon as he got back home!
If he could get back home.
He tentatively raised a hand. “Er, I don’t think I’m supposed to be her—”
“Whose nineteen day cash winnings total nine-hundred ninety-one thousand dollars! Now, here is the host of Jeopardy!, Ken Jennings!”
An absolute wither storm of applause kicked up, aiding the voice in completely squashing Mumbo’s will to protest. Oh no, he actually had to go along with this now; clearly no one was letting him get a word in otherwise.
What was this ‘Jeopardy’ even about? Was he going to have to build? Perform? Fight? Oh, the audience was going to be so disappointed, and Mumbo was going to be so humiliated.
The suited player stepped forward, striding to the center stage. “Thank you, Johnny. Welcome to Jeopardy! Our current champion, Mumbo, is looking well-prepared for his next round; hopefully ᓵ𝙹ᒲᒲᒷリℸᒷ∷ and ⎓∷╎ᒷリ↸ are feeling just as ready as he is. Now, let’s get into the first round!”
I am not looking ready, Mumbo thought, panicking slightly, loosening his tie.
And as the dark blue board began lighting up with various fresh words, and Ken Jennings’ voice echoed melodicly in the background, Mumbo once again wondered what on Sol he was doing here.