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Take It or Leave It
In the weeks that followed their quiet declarations of love and commitment to each other, Will and Jay felt an odd sense of stillness. Not peace, exactly. More an alleviation of anxiety. Plans had been made. Promises too. Their world as they knew it was set to change drastically, and soon.
And they couldn’t be happier at the prospect.
Will had formally notified UCAS of his choice to defer, so that decision was now final. The only other person who knew about it was his mum. She had taken the news much as expected; so delighted that her dear son was staying another year that she neglected to ask any difficult questions.
Will had considered telling Simon and Neil. Not making it a big thing, just casually dropping it into conversation as if it were nothing. He had reservations though, for obvious reasons. Primarily, the can of worms it would risk opening. But the more he talked it over with Jay, the more they considered whether it might be easier to just pop that proverbial can open and deal with whatever came crawling out.
They spent days carefully circling the subject. Examining it from different angles. They discussed timing, wording, all the possible reactions they might receive. They even started ranking the people in their lives in order of approachability, which had begun as a joke but somehow ended up becoming a genuine strategy.
Jay had been firm about one thing early on; under no circumstances was he telling his dad. Not yet, and certainly not while he was still living under his roof. Jay knew exactly how the conversation would go, and there was no version of it that ended well, in the short or long term. So, that would come later. After he’d moved out. After he had distance. Plenty of distance.
As for his own mum, Will was hesitant for different reasons. His prediction was that she would get too invested, in a way that would turn a single conversation into a situation requiring prolonged management. Evading well-meaning meddling. Offering constant reassurance. Being summoned to emotional follow-ups for weeks, even months, afterwards. It simply wasn’t something he was ready to subject himself to.
So, they agreed to start where it made the most sense. Friends first. Neil would be the easiest to start with. Or at least the most predictable. Simon would follow, separately. Approaching him would be a little more complicated. He was less safe than Neil, more volatile. Telling him would require more calculation. A practice run to fine-tune their approach.
It was decided. They’d tell Neil.
Somehow.
Eventually.
Jay’s bedroom was never somewhere Will imagined that he would ever feel comfortable. The ceiling was too low, there was little natural light, and the level of clutter was anxiety-inducing. However, over time, it had become more of a safe space to him. Not entirely safe, since Jay’s parents often lurked just beyond the floorboards. But it was a place where he and Jay could be their true selves. Where they could talk and rest easy in each other’s orbit.
And it probably helped that Jay now made a point of opening the curtains and tidying up when he knew Will was coming over.
From his spot on Jay’s bed, Will silently eyed the new poster hanging above the headboard. Some multicoloured '90s EDM thing. Jay called it classic, vintage. Will thought it was loud, gaudy. But it suited Jay to a tee, so he couldn’t help but like it just a little.
Across the room, Jay was crouched by the TV stand, fiddling with wires as he set up his PlayStation. Will watched him fondly for a moment before letting out a soft sigh.
“I should probably get going.”
Jay glanced up. “How come?”
“You’ve got Neil coming over.”
“Yeah, not for another half hour,” Jay said, nodding to his alarm clock display. “And you don’t have to leave just ’cos he’s coming ‘round. He’s your mate too.”
“I know. It’s just… healthy relationships require separate social interactions.”
“Oh? Read that one on a beer mat, did ya?”
Will scowled half-heartedly at the teasing look he was being shot. Done setting up, Jay stood upright, dusting off his hands.
“Neil’s gonna have to get used to you being around more anyway,” he continued. “Y’know, since you’re the love of my life an’ all that.”
Will’s eyes widened, face warming as he found himself unable to conjure a response. Clocking this reaction, Jay grinned proudly. Smiling despite himself, Will finally remembered how to form sentences again.
“Speaking of which, have you thought any more about it? You know; how best to… do it?”
“We’re not plotting a murder, babe.”
“Might be the easier option, to be fair,” Will muttered.
Jay snorted. “Yeah, fuck coming out. Let’s just merc everyone we know.”
Will chuckled as Jay flopped down onto the bed beside him. Their shoulders brushed lightly, and Will couldn’t ignore the warmth he felt as Jay leaned into it.
“Seriously though, what are you thinking?” Will pressed. “He’s your best mate, so I’ll gladly trust your judgement on how to approach him.”
With a soft smile, Jay shook his head. “Still mulling it over, to be honest. It’s like, I keep practising it in my head, and it’s all good. But when it comes to actually doing it…” He let out a sigh. “Neil’s pretty chill about most stuff. But I can’t get past the idea that he might… not be.”
Jay picked absently at a loose thread on his jogging bottoms. Will waited for him to elaborate.
“Don’t get me wrong,” he eventually continued. “I know he’d never hurt me. I don’t think he even has it in him to hate me. But I think he might… be different. Towards us. Me, in particular.”
Will considered that carefully.
“It’s quite possible that he might,” he admitted. “Let’s face it; things are different. But different doesn’t necessarily equate to bad. There’s no way of predicting how anyone is going to react to us, Jay. We’ll just have to hope for the best and deal with things as they come.”
Jay was quiet for a moment before nodding slowly.
“Yeah… Suppose that’s all we can do, really. No point in getting too wound up about it.”
“And there’s no rush either,” Will reminded him. “It’s whenever we’re ready. And I’m more than happy to be there when you tell Neil, or anyone else. Or not. Whatever you decide is best.”
Jay gave him a warm look. “Cheers, babe. You sure you’re not staying?”
“Nah, I’ll leave you to it. Enjoy your scholarly discourse about offside rules and formations and whatnot.”
Jay snorted. “Yeah, and you have fun rubbing one out to Mark Twain or whoever the fuck your flavour of the month is now.”
They grinned playfully at each other before leaning in. What was meant to be a simple goodbye kiss escalated rapidly. When teeth grazed his bottom lip invitingly, Will let himself sink into it, one hand instinctively grasping at Jay’s hoodie. Needing little encouragement, Jay shifted. In one well-practiced motion, he lowered Will onto his back and moved to straddle his hips. Will let out a startled noise.
“Jay!” he hissed. “Your mum’s home!”
Jay pressed another kiss just beneath Will’s jaw. “Yeah, gardening. S’fine.”
“But-”
“Shh…”
Will hesitated, briefly considering whether he ought to stop this.
Then Jay’s attention moved down to his neck, and all ideas of resisting flew out of the window. Of course, Jay knew all of Will’s sweet spots by now, knew exactly how to turn him into putty in his hands. If anything, it was a well-needed distraction. From the anticipation, the overthinking, the what-ifs… They owed this to themselves, really.
With a pleasurable sigh, Will threaded his fingers through Jay’s hair as their lips met again. He slid his free hand beneath Jay’s t-shirt, gently raking his lower back with blunt nails. Jay moaned huskily into his mouth, hips grinding downwards. Relishing the friction, Will smirked to himself. Naturally, he knew all of Jay’s sweet spots too.
All misgivings forgotten, Will allowed the moment to engulf him, immersing himself in every sensation. The vibrations of Jay’s chest as he moaned. The heat of their bodies pressed flush together. The sweet taste of chewing gum lingering on Jay’s tongue. The distinctive creak of the hinge on Jay’s bedroom door…
Will froze.
Jay, too, had gone completely still. Will knew that he hadn’t imagined it.
Someone was in the room.
Two sets of eyes snapped towards the door.
Neil stood there, one hand still on the handle, carrier bag dangling from the other. He stared at the scene in front of him, astonished.
Absolute silence followed.
Jay broke it.
“Shit!”
He lurched back so fast he nearly lost his balance, scrambling off the bed as if it had suddenly caught fire. Will pushed himself upright just as quickly, tugging his shirt down in a futile attempt to make this look less what it had looked like. Having dragged their stunned visitor into the room and slammed the door shut, Jay eyeballed Neil warily.
“What the fuck are you doing here?”
His agitated tone snapped Neil out of his stupor. “You said to come over.”
Jay gestured wildly at his alarm clock. “You’re early!”
“Sorry! I saw your mum outside. She said to go straight up.”
“Well, she shouldn’t have! Ever heard of knocking?”
“I never knock.”
“Well… maybe you should start!”
As Jay frantically paced in front of him, Neil’s gaze drifted to Will. He was sat rigidly on the edge of the bed, face flushed, still trying to compose himself. Neil gave him a friendly nod.
“Alright, Will?”
Will managed something resembling a smile and gave a small awkward wave. “Hi, Neil…”
The room went deathly quiet again. No one seemed quite sure where to look.
Will cleared his throat.
“Umm… I suppose you’re probably wondering…”
“Why you two were getting off with each other?” Neil offered.
Will flinched. “Yes. That.”
Jay glanced between Will and Neil, dread briefly flickering across his face before he forced it away.
“Look, you can’t say anything, alright?” he began shakily. “Not to anyone. Not even Si.”
Neil nodded without hesitation. “Alright. Promise.”
“Good. Right. So…”
Jay trailed off, his mouth working but his brain not supplying the words. He glanced desperately at Will, who looked just as goldfish-like.
“Are you seeing each other?” Neil asked mercifully.
Jay finally let go of the breath he’d been holding onto.
“Yeah…”
Feeling the weight of Neil’s inquisitive gaze, Jay allowed himself to retreat into familiar territory. Plastering on a cocky smirk, he sauntered back over to the bed and dropped down beside Will.
“Turns out that’s what happens if you get too much snatch,” he crowed. “You get bored. End up switching to blokes.”
He gave Will’s knee theatrical pat, then shrugged helplessly at the reproachful look he was shot in return.
Neil, meanwhile, looked enthralled. “Really?”
“Yep,” Jay said, the forced bravado already waning. “So, um… pace yourself with the ladies, yeah?”
Neil considered this, then glanced fleetingly at Will.
“So, how come Will’s bent too then?”
“I’m afraid I was just born this way, Neil,” Will replied dryly.
Neil nodded again. “Alright… Cool.”
He set his bag down on Jay’s desk and started rummaging through it. Will and Jay watched curiously as Neil produced a handful of PlayStation games and an extra controller.
“You playing too then, Will? Got Super Smash Bros if you don’t fancy Pro Evo.”
He tossed the spare controller onto the bed between Will and Jay. The two stared at it, dumbfounded. Then at each other. Then back up at Neil.
“What, that’s it?” Jay asked, incredulous.
Neil looked at them blankly. “What?”
“‘Alright, cool’?” Will echoed. “That’s really all you’ve got to say?”
“… Congrats?”
Neil held his hands out uncertainly, as if asking for confirmation that he’d given the correct response. Jay studied him.
“So… you’re, like… fine with it?” he asked cautiously.
Neil shrugged. “Yeah. ‘Course.”
“And you have no comment beyond that?” Will pressed. “Nothing? Not even any questions for us?”
Neil paused, thinking.
“…which one of you takes it up the bum?”
Will winced. “Anything but that.”
Neil shrugged again. “Not sure what you want me to say.”
“Well… nothing, really,” Will conceded. “It’s just… you’re taking this very well.”
“That’s what I said to you last night,” Jay muttered with a smirk.
Flushing, Will elbowed Jay in the ribs to silence him. Fortunately, Neil seemed to miss the lewd comment entirely as he stared at the wall, looking thoughtful.
“I think it’s ‘cos I’m not really that surprised.”
Will frowned. “You’re not?”
Neil shook his head. “Nah. Sort of had a feeling. Like I knew it might happen.”
That made Will sit up a little straighter. “Really?”
“Well, yeah. I mean, I already knew Jay fancied you.”
Jay let out a strangled noise. “What? No, you fucking didn’t!”
“Yeah, I did,” Neil said casually. “I asked you about it ages ago, remember? When I found that photo under your bed?”
Deeply intrigued by this news, Will turned to Jay slowly, a grin already forming. “What photo?”
“There was no photo!” Jay said quickly.
“Nah, there definitely was,” Neil insisted. “That one of you an’ Will at last year’s Christmas party? Where you’ve got your arm ‘round him?”
Jay opened his mouth. Nothing came out. Will was positively delighted.
“You went all red when I asked about it,” Neil continued helpfully.
“A bit like he is now, you mean?”
“Whose side are you on?” Jay whined, swatting Will’s knee.
“And then I asked if it was ‘cos you fancied him,” Neil went on. “And you told me to fuck off and called me a bender.”
Will let out a sharp laugh. “Oh, the irony!”
“But it was obvious that you did,” Neil concluded, then added, “and I always thought you might be a bit bent anyway, Will. No offence.”
“None taken,” Will replied flatly.
“So, I just figured something might happen eventually,” Neil finished. “Glad I was right. You’ve both been different lately. Like, you’re not as stressy, Will. And Jay’s less of a knob.”
Jay looked affronted. “Oi!”
“You are less of a knob,” Will parroted teasingly.
“I’m just saying,” Neil said, unfazed, “you’re happier an’ that. Being with someone who makes you happier just makes sense, yeah?”
Something in Will’s chest softened at that.
“Yeah,” he said quietly. “It really does.”
Jay swallowed thickly, trying not to look too affected. “Yeah… Cheers, mate.”
Neil grinned, shooting them a thumbs up. “No problemo.”
Then he turned back to the PlayStation, slotting a game in like nothing of significance had just occurred.
“So… we playing, then?”
Will looked at Jay, who looked right back. They didn’t need to say anything. They simply shared a thankful smile as Jay moved to connect to the third controller.
For a coming-out that had started so disastrously, it had gone better than either of them could have imagined.
One down.
One to go.
Now that Neil was up to speed, Will and Jay decided that they needed to tell Simon as soon as possible. Although they were sure it wouldn’t go as smoothly, they wanted to get it done while they were still riding the wave of confidence that Neil’s reaction had given them.
They arranged to meet up with Simon on Wednesday evening. Neil had been kind enough to offer his house as neutral territory, since his dad would be out anyway. As soon as Simon walked into Neil’s living room, he picked up on the weird vibe. Will and Jay were sat side by side on the sofa, suspiciously rigid in completely different ways. Will looked tense enough to snap in half, while Jay was trying so hard to appear relaxed that it circled right back around to looking anything but. Neil, meanwhile, sat cross-legged on the carpet in front of the television, perfectly at ease.
Simon frowned at the scene.
“What’s going on?”
Will glanced briefly at Jay before answering.
“There’s something we need to tell you.”
“Alright…” Simon said slowly. “What?”
“Please, take a seat.”
The stiffness of Will’s invitation only deepened Simon’s suspicion. He lowered himself cautiously into the armchair opposite them, eyes darting between the three.
“Has someone died?”
“No,” Will replied immediately.
Simon narrowed his eyes. “Is someone dying? Is one of you dying?”
“Nobody’s dying, Simon.”
“Oh. Right. Good.” Simon exhaled. “It’s just the looks on your faces made it seem like someone might be-”
“You’ll be dying in a minute, gobshite,” Jay interrupted. “Just shut the fuck up and listen, yeah?”
Simon did a double-take at Jay’s tone, but obligingly closed his mouth. Will took a few slow breaths, trying to gather the courage to force the words out.
“Okay. Well… as I said, we have something to tell you. ‘We’, meaning me and Jay. Neil already knows, so we thought it was only fair that you did too.”
Simon stared blankly back at him.
Will waited.
Simon continued staring.
Nothing happened.
After an agonising silence, Will finally blurted it out.
“Jay and I are… romantically involved.”
Simon’s expression didn’t change at all. If anything, he somehow looked even less responsive than before. The silence stretched painfully.
Jay cracked first.
“Could you have sounded any more like a Tory MP trying to talk his way out of a sex scandal?”
Will turned to him, affronted. “Well, my apologies for attempting to sugar the pill! I’ve never had to announce a relationship before, Jay!”
“Here, who’s this?” Jay grinned, putting on an absurdly posh voice. “‘Why yes, dearest Simon, I daresay young Cartwright and I have been a-courting these past few months.’”
Will gave him a deadpan look. “Firstly, that impression was grossly offensive. Secondly, I said nothing remotely like that.”
“My point is, this ain’t one of your poncy essays. Fuck the formality. Just say we’re seeing each other.”
Will sighed irritably. “Right. Fine. Simon, in case you didn’t hear me the first time and haven’t caught the gist by now: Jay and I are indeed ‘seeing each other’.”
Simon, who had barely seemed to register the exchange that had taken place before him, blinked several times.
“Sorry, what?”
Will raised an eyebrow at him. “Was I not clear?”
“No. I mean, yeah. I mean, I heard you,” Simon babbled. “I just… thought maybe this was some weird joke I wasn’t getting?”
“No, Si. We’re serious.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Jay’s brow furrowed. “What d’ya mean, you don’t believe us?”
“Well… ‘cos this is a prank, right?”
“Why would we prank you with this?” Will asked. “What would even be the point?”
Simon shrugged. “Dunno. You’re both weird. Maybe you think it’s funny somehow.”
“Well, it’s not funny, actually,” Jay said curtly. “Do you have any idea how hard it was for us to tell you this? And now you’re acting like we’re taking the piss?”
“I’m not trying to be a dick,” Simon said quickly. “It’s just… come on! Can you really blame me for being sceptical? I mean, it’s you two!”
From his place on the floor, Neil raised a hand like he was answering a question in class.
“I saw them getting off with each other,” he offered helpfully. “On Jay’s bed. Properly goin’ at it.”
Will and Jay both whipped around to stare at him in horror.
Simon simply rolled his eyes. “Oh, so you’re in on it too, then?”
“There’s nothing for him to be ‘in on’,” Will said, exasperated now. “This isn’t a joke, Simon.”
“Nah,” Simon replied, shaking his head. “Good effort, but I’m still not buying it.”
“For fuck’s sake…” Jay muttered.
Before Will could react, Jay suddenly shifted closer, grabbed his face firmly between both hands, and kissed him. Not subtly, either. Simon’s jaw dropped. He shot a wide-eyed look at Neil, who shrugged.
“You get used to it after a while,” he said flippantly.
Jay pulled back from a stunned-looking Will just enough to glance at Simon.
“That enough proof for you?” he asked bluntly. “Or do you want me to suck him off as well?”
Simon simply stared at them, eyes moving slowly between Jay and Will like his brain had stopped processing information correctly.
“… Since when?”
“Late November,” Will answered.
“The twenty-third,” Jay added.
Will glanced sideways at him, unable to stop a small smile tugging at his mouth.
Simon noticed it.
“So… what? Nearly seven months?” he huffed. “And you never told us?”
“Telling you now, ain’t we?” Jay replied.
“Right. Yeah. Bit late, but… fine. Whatever…” Simon sighed. “I just… I don’t get it.”
“Well, we’re not asking you to ‘get it’,” Jay said tersely. “We’re just telling you this is how things are.”
Will tried a more tactful approach. “What specifically are you struggling with, Si?”
Simon frowned, shaking his head as he gathered his thoughts.
“Well… so… what? You’re both just gay now all of a sudden?”
“Bisexuality exists, Simon,” Will said patiently.
“Yeah, but since when are you bisexual?”
“Since always,” Jay answered.
“And you just never said?”
Jay’s expression hardened. “It’s not your fucking business, is it? Why would we?”
“Because we’re supposed to be mates!” Simon shot back. “Best mates, actually. And neither of you thought to mention it?” He glanced suddenly at Neil. “What about you? Any hidden surprises you wanna share while we’re at it?”
“Oi!” Jay snapped. “Wind your neck in, alright? This isn’t about you. We didn’t owe you a fucking press release.”
Still trying to remain diplomatic, Will gave Simon a sympathetic look. “I wanted to tell you, Si. Honestly. But it’s difficult to talk about, and awkward. And the last thing I needed was another excuse for people at school to give me shit.”
“And you know what my dad’s like,” Jay added. “My life wouldn’t be worth living if he found out.”
Simon’s expression flickered briefly with something almost guilty, but it vanished quickly behind frustration.
“Well, it’s nice that you’re both so convinced that I can’t keep a fucking secret.”
“It’s not like that,” Will started. “It’s just-”
Simon cut him off. “So, what you’re saying is… this… is like, temporary, then?”
Will blinked, clueless. “I’m sorry, ‘temporary’”?
“I mean, you both still like girls, yeah?”
Understanding and disappointment dawned on Will’s face. “Oh…”
Jay looked between them.
“What’s he on about?”
Will sighed heavily. “He’s essentially implying that we’re using each other until one of us finds a girlfriend.”
Jay shot a glare at Simon, who threw his hands up in surrender.
“Well, aren’t you?” he blurted out.
Jay let out a disbelieving scoff. “Oh, yeah! ‘Cos that’s how love works, innit? You’re well bi-phobic, mate!”
“How’s that bi-phobic?” Simon demanded.
“Assuming bisexual people will inevitably sacrifice their same-sex relationships for a shot at heteronormativity is classic bi-phobia, Simon,” Will clarified. “And rather insulting to us on a personal level.”
“Think about it, you bellend,” Jay added. “If we were just getting off with each other for shits and giggles, why the fuck would we bother telling you about it?”
Simon hesitated.
“I’m just saying, it’s not like we know any other gay people. Or bi people, or whatever. So yeah, it does seem a bit… convenient.”
“Convenient?” Will echoed. “You think me deferring my university placement is about convenience?”
Simon looked genuinely blindsided.
“You’ve done what? For... this?”
“This’ can hear you, you arsehole!” Jay retorted.
Simon ignored him, staring at Will in disbelief. “You’re seriously postponing uni to knock about with Jay for a year?”
“Rather an oversimplification, but yes.” Will replied tightly.
Simon shot a look at Jay. “And what? You’re quite happy to let him fuck his life up for you?”
“I’m not fucking up my life,” Will cut in. “I’m making a decision based on what’s best for me and Jay.”
“Exactly,” Jay said. “And I’m supporting that decision. It’s what people in serious relationships do.”
Simon snorted. “What, sabotage each other’s dreams?”
“No,” said Will, voice starting to thin with irritation. “They compromise. We’ve given ourselves a year to get our shit together. Then I’ll go to Bristol, as intended.”
“Unless Jay changes your mind again,” Simon remarked derisively.
“Won’t need to.” Jay countered. “I’m going with him.”
Simon’s jaw dropped. Then, he scoffed. “Oh, the plot fucking thickens...”
From the floor, Neil suddenly looked stricken.
“What? You’re leaving me?”
Jay rolled his eyes, not unkindly. “It’s a few hours on the train, mate. You’ll survive.”
“And you can visit whenever you want,” Will added reassuringly.
“Can I?”
“Course you can,” Jay said.
Neil brightened. “Sweet!” Then his face fell again. “Wait… do they have a Greggs in Bristol?”
“I’d assume so.” Will replied.
Jay nodded. “They’ve got loads, mate. I checked. Plus, about seven Nando’s.”
Neil let out a joyful gasp. “Aw, sick! Can’t wait!”
Throughout this exchange, Simon had been staring at them all like they’d completely lost their minds.
“Sorry!” he exclaimed, with a humourless laugh. “But am I the only one who isn’t living in some fucked-up fantasy land here?”
Shooting Simon an irritated look, Jay snorted. “Nah. If this was a fantasy land, you’d have fucked off by now.”
Simon scowled. “You honestly think you’ll make it to Bristol together? You’ll be sick of each other before the year’s even over.”
Will forced a sardonic smile. “Thanks for the vote of confidence, Simon.”
“I’m just being honest!” Simon shot back defensively. “I’m trying to be a good mate here!”
“Well, I’d suggest trying harder.” Will replied coolly.
“A lot fucking harder,” Jay muttered beside him.
Simon sighed in frustration, throwing his hands up.
“Sorry, but as someone who knows both of you really well, this just isn’t gonna work out. Jay, you know you get bored easily. The novelty’ll wear off. I mean, it’s Will, for fuck’s sake.”
“I’m not a five-year-old with a yo-yo, you condescending twat,” Jay growled. “You’ve got no fucking idea what Will means to me!”
Simon ignored him completely, turning instead towards Will.
“And you,” he continued, “you’ve always had all these ridiculously high standards for what you want in a girl.”
“Good thing I’m not a girl then, innit?” Jay cut in sharply.
“But I’m guessing the same standards apply for blokes, yeah?”
Jay’s jaw tightened. “And what, you’re saying I can’t possibly meet them?”
“Of course, you fucking can’t!” Simon snapped back. “And the second Will gets to Bristol, he’s gonna realise that for himself!”
“That’s enough, Simon!”
The sudden steeliness in Will’s voice startled everyone. Every trace of diplomacy had left him now. He leaned forward, fixing Simon with an unwavering glare.
“Let me be abundantly clear. Jay isn’t just some placeholder for me to frivolously upgrade from. I love him. He is my partner. My future. He’s indispensable to me. And I’m not going to sit back and allow him to be disrespected. Especially not by someone who is supposed to be our friend. Now, either apologise to Jay, or get the fuck out.”
For the longest time, nobody spoke. Will sat motionless, his gaze unyielding, almost daring Simon to cross him again. Jay slouched by his side, mouth agape and eyes slightly wide. Neil glanced awkwardly between them all before quietly deciding his safest course of action was to study the carpet. Simon’s eyes flicked uncertainly between Will and Jay, lingering on the unfamiliar fury in Will’s expression.
For a second, he looked like he wanted to argue back. Instead, his shoulders sagged.
“Look, I’m sorry, alright?” he muttered awkwardly. “This is just… it’s a lot to take in. I need to think.”
Will glanced briefly at Jay, who looked unmoved, before answering.
“Then kindly do it elsewhere.”
Simon winced slightly at that, but obligingly rose to his feet.
“…Right. Fair enough…”
And with that, he left, Neil’s front door closing softly behind him.
Only then did Will finally exhale.
The adrenaline was still buzzing unpleasantly beneath his skin. He hadn’t even realised how tense he’d become until now. Beside him, Jay was still staring at the doorway Simon had disappeared through.
“Are you okay?” Will asked softly.
Jay turned towards him. Then, to Will’s surprise, he broke into a grin.
“After that?” he said. “I’m fucking amazing.”
Will arched an eyebrow. “Really? I was worried I'd overreacted.”
“Fuck, no!” Jay laughed. “That was like, the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen you do! You put him right in his place! Serious dom daddy energy! It was hot, babe!”
Despite Jay’s colourful phrasing, or perhaps because of it, Will found himself smiling. He heard a snigger come from across the room and met Neil’s amused expression sheepishly.
“Sorry, Neil. It’s not really my place to throw people out of your house.”
Neil shrugged from his spot on the carpet. “No worries. He was bang out of order, with what he said about Jay. Anyone wanna beer?”
Jay grinned at him. “You see? This is why you were the first to know. You’re an S-tier mate, mate!”
Neil looked delighted by this declaration and scrambled to his feet. The second he disappeared into the hallway, the air in the room finally felt breathable again. Will leaned back against the sofa with a long sigh.
“Well, I suppose that could’ve gone better.”
Jay shrugged. “Could’ve gone worse too.”
“True.” Will paused. “He’ll come around. Hopefully.”
“Oh, he will,” Jay said, with a lazy grin. “Once he gets over his jealousy.”
“Jealousy?”
“Yep,” Jay slung an arm around Will’s shoulders. “‘Cos he knows he’ll never find a passion like ours. Not in a million years. Ours is a love story for the ages.”
Will snorted softly. “And which of us is Elizabeth Bennet in this scenario?”
Jay frowned. “Who?”
“Pride & Prejudice? Elizabeth and Mr Darcy?”
Jay cocked an eyebrow. “He sounds minted. I’ll be him.”
Will chuckled, the remaining tension in his chest finally starting to dissolve.
“Seriously though,” Jay continued as he leaned in, voice softer now. “Can you imagine Si having the balls to stand up for someone the way you stood up for me just then?”
Bashfulness softened Will’s expression.
“Well… you’d have done the same for me.”
“In a heartbeat.”
The certainty in Jay’s voice made warmth spread through Will’s chest all over again. Without thinking about it, he leaned in and kissed him, soft and doting. Jay hummed against his mouth, leaning into it eagerly.
Then footsteps sounded in the hallway.
They sprang apart just as Neil re-entered carrying three bottles by the neck. Unfortunately, the knowing grin on his face suggested they hadn’t separated quickly enough.
“Aww!” Neil said fondly. “It’s dead sweet how ride-or-die youse are for each other. Like them two penguins off that nature show.”
As they were handed their drinks, Will leaned towards Jay.
“Hear that?” he murmured, clearly amused. “We’re penguins.”
Jay snorted, taking a quick swig of his beer. “Could be worse. Wait ’til he finds out about gay dung beetles.”