Chapter Text
(Tan's POV)
That evening, I was leaving school alone.
Fang was having a party with the girls from his class.
Ever since he’d taken that extra course on communication and project mediation in architecture—don’t ask me what exactly that is, I still haven’t figured it out—he’d made some new friends.
And honestly?
It made me happy.
Because Fang has always been someone who gets along well with people.
Very well, in fact.
He’s polite, calm, intelligent, attentive.
People naturally like him.
But the problem is that his relationships often remain… superficial.
As if, unconsciously, he always kept a certain distance.
Friendships with Fang tend to end when class is over.
At six o’clock.
As if he refuses to open the door all the way.
As if he’s afraid of letting people get too close to his life.
And I think few people notice this, because he’s very good at giving the impression that everything is fine.
But I see it.
I see when Fang smiles just out of politeness.
When he participates in a conversation without really feeling involved.
When he listens without ever talking about himself.
So naturally, seeing a real group form around him this year…
Seeing Fang start to genuinely care about people…
It touched me much more than it probably should have.
At first, it was subtle.
A few messages.
Group projects.
Then we’d have lunch together.
And now?
They regularly organized get-togethers outside of school.
And even though Fang had tried to act like it was “no big deal,” I knew full well that it meant the world to him.
Because that morning, before heading to class, he’d spent almost an hour picking out his outfit.
( when i wrote that i forgot that thailandese wear uniform ... )
Yes.
Fang.
An hour.
I think that moment will stay with me until the day I die.
The worst part was that he was pretending to be relaxed.
“Tan, do you prefer the black sweater or the gray one?”
Me, naively:
“Whichever one you want, Teerak.”
Mistake.
Huge mistake.
Because he then looked at me for thirty seconds with an offended expression before pulling three more sweaters out of the closet.
And honestly?
I think I could have watched him do that for hours.
Because Fang, when he’s nervous, becomes incredibly adorable without even realizing it.
He furrows his brow slightly.
Mumbles to himself.
Changes his mind every two minutes.
And most of all…
He starts asking for opinions even though he hates depending on other people’s opinions.
That means something really matters to him.
In the end, he’d chosen a simple cream-colored sweater with loose black pants.
Gorgeous.
Obviously.
Fang could wear a plastic bag and still look good.
And unfortunately for my sanity, he’d come to ask for one last approval before leaving.
— Are you okay?
“I’m okay.”
As if he wasn’t already ruining my life in that outfit.
I’d walked up to him slowly before tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.
Just to have an excuse to touch him.
“You’re handsome.”
His ears turned red instantly.
My favorite thing to do.
“Tan, be serious.”
“I’m very serious.”
Then I noticed something.
Beneath his nervousness…
He also looked excited.
Not stressed.
Not closed off.
Excited.
And that was new.
So I gently cupped his face in my hands, then kissed him. He laughed, then took my hand, and we headed off to school.
Let’s get back to his friends.
They had become a particularly close group of four.
Three girls.
And Fang.
Well… technically, there were other people who hung around them too, but those four clearly formed the core group.
And honestly?
It made me melt in a weird way.
Because now, Fang sometimes went out after class.
He’d stay behind to work on projects.
He’d go eat with them.
Sometimes he’d even forget to reply for two hours because he was too busy laughing or chatting.
The guys thought I was going to get jealous or possessive.
But honestly?
I was mostly just happy.
Really happy.
Because my baby was finally making friends of his own.
Even though Fang was fully integrated into our group now, it was still different.
Basically, the boys were mostly my friends.
And Fang’s brother, that doesn't count.
So yes, over time, everything had naturally blended together. Now we shared everything: our routines, our outings, our vacations, our meals, our problems.
But despite all that, it wasn’t the same as having relationships that were entirely his own.
Then there was also the fact that his best friend lived far away now.
And I knew that sometimes it weighed on him more than he’d admit.
Fang isn’t the type to easily say, “I feel lonely.”
So you have to learn to read between the lines.
In his silences.
In his exhaustion.
In the way he stays a little too close to me some nights.
So seeing people reach out to him spontaneously…
Inviting him.
Thinking of him.
Sincerely appreciating him.
It made me almost ridiculously happy.
Because he deserved it.
And honestly?
These new friendships didn’t change a thing about the fact that at night…
It was me who was waiting for him at home.
Me who could enjoy his presence until morning.
And that?
That was my privilege.
So yes, that night, I was going home alone.
Poor me.
Fang had gone to a bar with the girls from his class.
Before leaving, I’d obviously offered:
“If you want, I can pick you up later.”
And immediately, Fang had sighed with that look that clearly said, “Tan, stop being so dramatic.”
“Get some rest. I’ll take a taxi.”
“But I can—”
“Tan.”
That authoritative tone.
Terrifying.
I raised my hands in surrender.
— Okay, okay.
Then I added:
— Text me when you get home.
And then…
Fang’s expression immediately softened.
Just a little.
That subtle, private look he only ever gave me.
— I will.
Then he straightened his jacket before coming over to give me a quick kiss.
As if it had become natural now.
As if we were truly a settled couple.
And honestly?
That thought made me fall completely in love all over again.
So yes.
I let him go.
But that didn’t mean I was going to sleep without him.
Absolutely not.
I’d wait for him.
Even if it meant staying up until two in the morning.
Because sleeping without Fang, now…
It was a bit like trying to sleep without a blanket.
Possible.
But frankly, not nearly as good.