Archive of Our Own

The dog thing happened by accident. 

Buck would like to make that clear, he really never planned for any of this to happen. 

If he really thought about it, this whole thing actually started when he was still in high school. Well, the dog shelter thing, not the dog thing itself. 

The dog shelter thing, well, that started right before Maddie moved away. She had just started seeing ‘douchebag Doug’, as Buck called him. In fact, he had called him that to his face, and honestly that was the catalyst to all of this. Doug really did not like Buck, and really, really, did not like how close he and Maddie were. 

He told Maddie it was weird to have her kid brother always hanging around. Buck thought it was weird that Doug hated when Maddie was with anyone else but him. So Maddie did the only thing she knew how to do when Buck got all angry and angsty, she directed his energy into something else. 

She took him to the local animal shelter. She had a friend who worked there, and they were happy to take Buck as a volunteer each weekend. And Buck? He’d always loved animals, but he loved dogs. He’d wanted a dog since he was old enough to talk, but his parents were never for it. 

They said a dog was too messy and too much responsibility for him. He’d had to settle for a goldfish, which he did love until it died five years later. Apparently, that was pretty long for a goldfish. Maddie said it was a testament to how much he loved that fish, and she thought he could spread some of that love to all of the abandoned, stray, or lost dogs in the shelter.

And that’s how the dog pound thing started. 

Even after Maddie moved away, Buck kept volunteering at the animal shelter. He walked the dogs, bathed them, fed them, and loved them. When a dog had to be put down, Buck was the last one to squeeze them tight and cover them in kisses. When a dog first came in, he was usually the first one to get them to trust a hand holding out a treat. The employees and other volunteers called him the dog whisperer, and Buck wore that like a badge of honor. 

When Buck had to leave home, when he had to leave that cold, empty, house, the animal shelter was the last place he stopped to say goodbye. The only place, actually. 

Then, when he was on the road for those first years in his twenties, Buck found himself at a lot of different animal shelters. Whenever the loneliness became too overwhelming, he would look up the nearest animal shelter and waltz right in. He never got turned away. They would just hand him a leash and off he would go for a quick run and some nice, free, doggy cuddles and kisses. 

But the dog thing, that’s the focus of all of this. That happened by accident. When Buck was at his absolute lowest. Right after he made the biggest mistake of his life and sued the only family he had ever known. 

That’s when Peggy stumbled into his life. Or rather, hobbled. 

In terms of the worst shifts of his life, this one might take the cake. 

Worse than the plane crash, the accidental bank robbing, and even the truck bombing. Yes, worse than one of the most terrifying moments of his life. The only shift Buck can think of that was worse than this one, was the roller coaster accident, where Devin died and Buck suffered his first loss. 

All day, his co-workers —because that’s what they were now, just co-workers, not family, not even friends. They’ve made that clear and honestly, Buck can’t even blame them. He hates himself right now too—  they barely even look at him. They only speak to him when they need something, and even then they’re more likely to ask the newest probie to do a task than to ask Buck. 

It’s clear that Buck has lost their trust. He knows that, and he knew when he walked in at the start of the shift today that he would have a lot to make up for. But he was willing to do it. He was ready. He was back at work! Finally! After months of literal pain and suffering and near death experiences, he was finally coming back to the only thing that ever made his life worth anything. 

That’s the thought that keeps swirling through his head as he sits slumped over in his jeep, his forehead pressed against his steering wheel. Being a firefighter is all he has, and for so long it was taken from him. He thought he had been doing the right thing, doing whatever it took to come back, but now he knows that it wasn’t right at all. Nothing that could hurt his family like this, could ever be right. He realizes that now. 

The 118 was the only place he had ever felt love like that freely given and now he has to live with the fact that he’s ruined it. 

A thought interrupts his pity party; there was one other place he felt that love. That first animal shelter back in Hershey. 

Since moving to L.A., he hasn’t had time to visit a shelter. Too busy with firefighting or some other crazy drama in his life. With his mind made up, Buck looks up the nearest one and puts his Jeep into drive. 

The shelter is only ten minutes away, and they’re happy to let him in to volunteer. The woman running the shelter, Sandy, asks if he’s ever done this before. He’s in an honest and vulnerable spot so he tells her the truth. 

When he mentions that his station calls him an animal whisperer, she perks up. She doesn’t need to know that they don’t call him that anymore, mostly because they don’t even talk to him anymore.

“We have this dog, actually,” Sandy says, pulling Buck away from his self-deprication, “she’s pretty nervous around people right now. She was surrendered to us about a month ago and only barely lets me near her before she starts crying.” Sandy waves Buck over to the door leading to the kennels as she speaks. 

“Surrendered?” Buck asks. 

“Yeah. She came from a local breeder. They said they couldn’t get anyone to take her, and they couldn’t handle her. She was in a pretty bad accident as a puppy that left her…well…looking different than what most purebred owners want.” 

Buck’s heart breaks a little. He knows a little about not being wanted.

“If you have time, maybe you could sit with her for a while?” Sandy asks as they approach the kennel in the far left corner. Buck is already nodding. 

“Yeah, of course.” 

Sandy grins and reaches into her pocket to hand him a pile of treats, “Great! Her name is Peggy and she’s just under a year old.” Sandy gestures back down the hall, “I have to get back to the front desk, but just shout if you need anything.” 

With that, it’s just Buck standing in front of the kennel. At first, he didn't see any dog there. There’s a laminated paper hooked on the chainlink fence door, reading the name “Peggy”. Underneath the name is a photo of the cutest golden retriever puppy with ears shyly tucked back. 

“Peggy?” Buck calls gently into the kennel. He ignores all of the other dogs barking or whining for his attention in the other kennels. His focus is entirely on Miss Peggy, wherever she is. 

In the farthest corner, a lump of blankets shifts. He calls out again.

“Hi Peggy, sweet girl.” The blanket lump stands, and shakes. That blankets tumble down to the ground and a gangly, golden retriever puppy hops forward. Hops, because she’s missing her back left leg. Buck’s heart melts. 

“Hi sweetheart,” he whispers and crouches down in front of the chainlink door. He’s found that leaving the door closed for the more nervous dogs works best. It gives them the safety of a barrier. Buck takes out one of the little treats and pushes it as far as he can under the door. 

“I brought a treat for you, miss Peggy. Do you want a treat?” He keeps his voice soft and light, and Peggy’s big puppy head tilts. She’s clearly still in that puppy phase where her head and her paws are growing faster than the rest of her.

“A treat, princess?” He asks again. She clearly knows that word. Her tail flicks up. Buck pushes another treat under the door and manages to flick it further than the first. Peggy flinches minutely but Buck whispers assurances. 

“It’s just a treat sweetheart. It’s okay, you can have the treat.” 

Peggy’s tail flicks again and she takes two steps forward. She sniffs the air around the treat timidly and Buck holds his breath. Slowly, Peggy stretches her tongue out to the treat. As soon as her tongue touches it, Peggy gulps it down then looks expectantly up at Buck. 

“Good? I got more.” He flicks the other treat towards her, and this time she doesn’t flinch. She just wags her tail softly. Peggy licks up the next treat and takes a few more steps forward. 

Taking a risk, Buck holds the next treat out in his flat palm, through the gap in the chain links. Peggy hops forward, sniffing the air above his hand, and looks up at him with round, brown eyes.

“It’s alright sweet girl, I’ve got a treat for you.” 

Peggy sniffs his finger tips, her cold wet nose brushing against his skin. Then her tongue darts out and gently bites the treat out of his hand. While she chews, Buck takes the chance to scratch under her chin. Peggy doesn’t flinch. In fact, she presses her big, fluffy head into his palm. Buck audibly coos. 

A few more head scratches through the fence door, and Peggy’s tail is wagging aggressively. She’s pressed her whole body against the chain link and whines quietly, deep in her chest.

“Okay, okay, I’ll come in sweetheart. Just back up, okay?” Buck chuckles, and stands, his knees creaking. He opens the door and Peggy obediently steps back. Buck just manages to shut the door behind him and sit on the ground, before Peggy is practically throwing herself into his arms. Buck’s laugh catches him by surprise. He doesn’t remember the last time he laughed. 

Maybe the last time he was with Christopher? 

Peggy’s whole body is a wiggling worm as she yelps happily and rubs against his chest. All three of her paws manage to balance in his lap and Buck welcomes her readily. His hands never stop petting through the softest golden fur. And Peggy’s puppy velvety head rubs against his chin. Then her tongue rolls out and laps at his jaw. 

Buck just keeps laughing and saying, “Good girl Peggy! Such a good girl! Who’s the most perfect girl in the world? You are!” And other iterations, over and over. 

He’s not sure how much time passes, but after some apparently much needed cuddles on both sides, Buck finds a little squeaker toy shaped like a dog bone, and throws it around the small kennel. 

That’s how Sandy finds them. 

“Oh wow!” She says, and Peggy immediately drops the bone and races to Buck’s lap. She doesn’t hide, though. She licks Buck’s face again and barks excitedly at Sandy, panting as if to say, look what I got! 

Sandy laughs, “Wow Peggy! Did you make a friend?” Peggy’s tail wags like, yes yes yes yes!

Buck’s heart melts and flips in his chest. He looks up at Sandy, and she already knows what he’s going to say before he does. 

Ten minutes later, Buck has the adoption papers in one hand, and a bright pink leash in the other. Peggy Buckley goes home with him that night. It’s the happiest Buck has been since he was trapped under that truck. 

The thing about having a dog in his apartment is that he’s not supposed to have a dog in his apartment. Buck knows that if his landlord finds out, he will be in serious trouble. He also knows that his landlord doesn’t live in L.A. anymore and is mostly retired up north somewhere. So the chances of him finding out are low, but not zero. 

He thinks about getting Peggy certified as an emotional support animal so his landlord can’t say anything about it, but he doesn’t really like his apartment anyway. Besides, the stairs are a bit tough for Peggy to get up each night for bedtime. (And a bit tough for Buck and his bad leg but nobody else needs to know that.)

Besides that, getting Peggy is the best thing he’s ever done. She goes on runs with him, watches movies with him, cuddles against him while he reads, dozes in the sun while he tends to his balcony garden, and cutely whines for food scraps while he cooks dinner. To say that Buck loves this dog is an understatement. She’s quickly become his whole world. 

She’s also quickly become the most spoiled dog in the world. She has two baskets of toys, one upstairs and one down, to go along with her two dog beds. Again, one upstairs and one down. She’s on the best diet that Buck and her veterinarian could craft. Get’s daily exercise, and Buck even found the perfect doggy day care that would keep her overnight during his longer shifts. He didn’t even know something like that existed, but a cool Reddit post found it for him.

It’s only been about two weeks, but Buck can’t imagine a life without Peggy. His spirits have well and truly been lifted. He skips into work everyday now, literally. 

“Wow, someone’s in a good mood.” Chimney remarks. It’s the first time since Buck came back where someone else has started a conversation with him. Buck grins. 

“You could say that,” he chirps, putting his bag away in his locker. “This week has just been the best,” he notes. 

Chim trails after him out of the locker room, “What’s so special about it? Someone special?” 

Buck laughs, “You could say that, yeah. But she’s actually a—” He is of course immediately cut off by the tones blaring and then all conversation is lost as Chimney races to the ambulance and Buck towards the ladder truck.

The call turns out to be a cat stuck in a tree. Buck is already laughing when they pull up, meanwhile everyone else is groaning. A firefighter getting a cat out of a tree might be steretypical and funny, but it’s also not easy and usually results in a firefighter covered in scratches. 

“Alright Buck,” Bobby remarks, “since you think it’s so funny, you can be the one going up the ladder.”

Buck just grins, “Sure thing cap!” He’s bounding out of the truck with a pep in his step. He can’t help it! He gets to go do a quintessential firefighter thing, and it’s the first time Cap has specifically asked him to do something since he came back to work. Today is turning out to be the best day ever. 

He barely registers the weird looks everyone is giving him as he starts to make his way up the ladder, humming under his breath. 

“What’s the cat's name again?” Buck asks the radio on his shoulder.

Hen answers, “Owner says Brad Kit,” her voice dry and dull, “but they call him Brad or kitty.” 

Buck snorts, “That’s awesome.” 

As he approaches the brown tabby cat stuck on the highest branch, he starts making little pspsps noises. 

“Come here kitty, come here Brad!” Buck coos. The cat hisses from the branch. When the ladder reaches the branch, he digs in his front pocket. A few days ago, he realized that he doesn’t always have time to change before he picks up Peggy, and then they have to go straight on their run or to the grocery store or whatever, in order to keep Peggy’s schedule. 

For a young puppy, Peggy sure does love a schedule. Buck can relate. 

All of this to say, he realized that it’s just easier to keep a few training treats in his uniform breast pocket. They’re especially coming in handy right now. He takes a few treats out and holds his palm flat out to the cat. 

“Here you go, Brad, kitty. Come here sweet boy.” He coos gently again. 

The cat sniffs the air nervously. Then, with a soft whine, it steps forward. 

“That’s it! Good boy! Come here kitty!” Buck encourages, and soon enough the cat is eating out of his palm and Buck is able to scoop him up. 

“Cat retrieved!” Buck calls triumphantly into his radio.

“Alright, Buck, pulling you in.” Eddie responds, just as stunted as he always is now. But Buck can’t let that tone of voice hurt him when he’s got an armful of sweet kitty. The ladder starts to retract and Brad Kit is licking his palm for any residue treats. Buck whispers sweet words to the cat and pets his soft, glossy fur. 

When he gets his two feet back on the ground, he’s immediately swarmed by a little girl crying out for her beloved cat. Buck deposits the cat into her arms and the cat practically vibrates with purrs. It makes Buck’s heart warm and blossom. 

“Wow Buck. I know you’re the animal whisperer but that’s a new record even for you.” Chim remarks with a pop of his bubble gum, leaning against the firetruck. 

Buck grins, absolutely thrilled to have that title bestowed upon him once more. “What can I say? It’s just a gift.” He shrugs, and that’s when he notices all the cat hair stuck on his chest. He frowns as he tries to brush it off. “Awe man,” he mutters, “Peggy’s gonna be so mad…” 

He hears Chim’s bubble gum pop suddenly, but before he can look up the mother of the girl is calling him over. He gladly trots over to her and the girl, still cradling her cat. 

“Meg here has something she’d like to say to you, sir.” The mother prompts the girl. The little girl, Meg, looks up shyly. Buck smiles encouragingly and crouches in front of her. 

“Hi Meg, what’s up?” 

Meg takes a deep breath, “Um, I just wanted to say thank you, for climbing up the tree and getting Brad Kit for me. I’m really sorry he got up there. I-it wa-as an ac-cide-ent,” Meg starts stuttering and gasping like she might start crying again. Buck does his best to hush and soothe the poor girl. 

“It’s okay, I know it was an accident. Do you want to know how I know that?” He asks, and Meg nods. Buck reaches out a finger to stroke the back of Brad Kit’s head. The cat flicks his ear but otherwise keeps close to Meg. “I can tell, because it’s obvious to me how much Brad loves you. So that tells me that you are really, really, good at taking care of him.” 

Meg’s whole face brightens up with pride. She nods rapidly, “Yeah! I am! He’s my best friend in the whole world!” 

Buck chuckles. “I’m sure. I have a dog, named Peggy, and she’s my best friend in the whole world. I’d do anything to take care of her.” 

Meg grins, “I love dogs! But my dad’s allergic so we had to get a cat instead, but that’s okay because we got Brad and he’s the best cat EVER!” Buck laughs again. 

“I can tell. He’s very sweet.”

“The sweetest! Do you have pictures of your dog?” 

Buck has his phone half out before the girl has finished talking. He shows Meg and her mom the latest photo of Peggy, from earlier that morning before he took her to doggy day care. In the photo, she’s standing in a patch of sunlight, golden fur absolutely glowing, just in front of the balcony door. She has her favorite rope toy in her mouth, with her head titled cutely at Buck like she’s just waiting patiently for him to play tug-o-war with her. Both daughter and mother coo appropriately and thank him again for his help. He’s just saying goodbye when Bobby shouts his name from the truck. 

When Buck’s only halfway into the truck, he twists his body to wave at them both and Meg raises her arm in a universal Pull the horn! gesture. So Buck grins and reaches over everybody in the cab, ignoring their cries of outrage, to pull the horn for her. Bobby calls his name in exasperation, but Buck doesn’t feel at all bad as he leans back in his seat. Because he can hear Meg’s laughter as they start to pull away. 

When he looks around the cab, he see’s his team rolling their eyes in this fond…familair way. Even Eddie has a little half smile on his face, and Bobby is just shaking his head in that way he used to when Buck got up to his antics. 

For the first time in so long Buck sits in the firetruck and he’s not thinking about bombs blowing up or his family yelling at him in a grocery store. He’s not thinking about anything, really. He just feels like, maybe he does still have a place here, after all. 

As they start back towards the firehouse, something warm and wonderful settles in his chest. 

From then on, Peggy sort of just slips into his daily life and vernacular. He talks about her all the time. It’s like, that little girl and her mom asking about her made him realize, oh right, I have something wonderful to talk about now!

In the same way Hen gets to talk about Karen and Denny, and Chim gets to wax poetic about Maddie, and Eddie gets to gush about Chris, Buck get’s to rant about Peggy and all the ways she’s made his life so much better than before.

Like, now Buck goes on runs and walks way more than ever before, and he’s shocked by how much fun it is. Hen sees him walk into his next shift, still in his running clothes from earlier that morning. Part of his routine with Peggy now is to run her to the doggy daycare that’s only a few miles from his apartment, then he runs back, drinks his breakfast smoothie and drives to work. He get’s to the station a little early now because of this, so he has time to take a shower before the shift starts. 

It’s been nice. He hasn’t been late to a single shift since getting Peggy. 

On this day, Hen is early too. She’s humming while she laces up her boots in the locker room. “Morning Hen!” Buck greets cheerfully. He rifles through his locker in search of his shower supplies. 

“Hi, Buckaroo. Are those running shoes?” Hen asks, sounding surprised. Buck smiles as he turns to show off his shoes to her.

“Yup! I just got them. They’re so nice. I was researching the best pair and went down this whole rabbit hole about running shoes and the type of ground you run on and even what the average temperature in your city is—I had no idea runners were so intense about their shoes.” He rambled and Hen smiled indulgently but tilted her head. 

“I thought you hated running?” 

Buck shrugged, “I did, I guess, but that was when I was running alone. Now that I have Peggy, it’s way more fun. And it’s not like I’m trying to train for anything, you know? So sometimes we just walk instead or we stop at parks or something. I think tomorrow I’m going to see if there’s a cafe or something we can stop at, I think she’d like that.” 

Peggy had started to come out of her shell more and more, especially with other people. Whatever those breeders had done to her had made her really shy of anyone besides Buck. But the other day at the dog park she had pulled on the leash until they approached this old lady sitting on a bench. Buck’s still not sure what about the woman made Peggy want to say hi so bad, but she’d been happy to get a few pets from Peggy. It made Buck think that she might like going to a pet store or pet friendly cafe or something, to get other pats from other nice strangers. 

“That sounds really sweet Buck,” Hen says, pulling him out of his thoughts. “It’s nice that you and uh…Peggy…have something to do together.” 

Buck grins, but before he can answer, his smartwatch vibrates with an alarm to remind him to get in the shower. Again, Peggy’s schedule is strict and Buck knows he’s forgetful. Once he started setting alarms for all of Peggy’s feedings or walks or whatnot, he realized how useful they really were. He began setting them for literally everything else. It’s helped alot with his attention problem. 

“Sorry,” he says, “gotta hit the showers before shift starts.” 

It’s Buck’s turn to cook dinner for the station today, and he’s not going to mess it up. It’s the first time he’s been tasked with this since he came back and he wants to prove to everyone and yes, okay, to Bobby, that he’s not a lost cause anymore. He can do this, and he can do it well. He’s even been practicing. 

Tonight, he’s making chili, and it’s going to be great. Now, typically, chili in a fire house is a bad idea. Overnight shifts, crowded bunkrooms, stomachs full of gas, it’s a recipe for disaster. But the shift is set to end at eight tonight, and it was a request from someone on B shift. And since the B shift has been talking to him more than A shift, he took it to heart. 

He’s almost done, doing the final mix when Bobby comes to check on him. The captain had been eyeing him all evening, hovering at the edges of the kitchen but never fully approaching. It had been nerve wracking, to say the least. Buck tried to not let it get to him. 

“It uh…it smells good, Buck.” Bobby says, a little stilted. Buck feels his face flush. He tries to disguise it by leaning closer to the steam rising from the pot. 

“Oh, thanks Cap. I’ve, uh, been practicing this recipe.” He confessed, giving the pot a good stir. “Think I might have cracked it.” 

Bobby moves like he’s going to step closer to the stove but backs out at the last second. “Smells good,” he says. 

Buck clutches the wooden spoon and takes a deep breath. “I haven’t had anyone to taste it yet. Would you…Would you like to try?” 

Bobby blinks. Buck wants to try and take it back, say it’s stupid, but then Bobby’s smiling softly. Maybe a little tentatively.

“Sure, Buck. I’d love to.” He steps up next to Buck and takes the wooden spoon from him. He spoons up just a little and gives it a taste. Buck holds his breath.

Bobby’s eyes grow three sizes. “Wow, Buck. This is…this is amazing!” 

“Really?”

“Really. It’s perfect.” Bobby places a warm, comforting hand on Buck’s shoulder, and Buck can’t help the way that simple, fatherly touch lights him up. He feels like he grows three sizes taller. A smile takes over his face. This is the first time Bobby has said something positive to him since…since maybe the tsunami. 

“Wow, thank you Bobby! I’m so glad you liked it! I mean, I like it, and of course Peggy liked it when she begged for a bite. But it means a lot to me that you like it.” He puts the used spoon in the sink and turns off the stove top, getting ready to serve the meal. 

“I thought I was the first one to taste it,” Bobby says, and he sounds a little like he’s teasing Buck, just like he used to. Buck flushes again. 

“You are! Peggy doesn’t really count. She likes anything.” He doesn’t mention how he’s seen Peggy sniff and lick her own turd so, there really is no accounting for taste. 

Bobby chuckles. “Come on kid, I’ll set the table. You rally the troops.”

Buck can’t help but grin, a literal pep put into his step. When the team comes bounding up the steps, they all pat him on the shoulder, tell him it smells great and they can’t wait to eat his cooking again. They pile on the compliments as they eat, and Buck would think they’re just playing with him but, even Eddie compliments him.

He says, “Wow, Buck. You should make this for me and Chris sometime. It would finally get him to eat some vegetables.” He’s even smiling as he says it and Buck can’t help but stare for a minute. 

 It’s the first time that Eddie has smiled at him since before the lawsuit. Buck can’t help but smile back.  

“I’d love to. Oh!” He comes up with a great idea, “I can bring Peggy! I think Chris would just love her, and she’s gotten so good with kids lately!”

It’s true, Peggy has made friends with all the kids that live in Buck’s building. They just love her. They even knock on Buck’s door sometimes on the weekends, just to ask to say hi to her. It would be a little annoying if Peggy wasn’t so gosh darn sweet and gentle with them, despite her puppy energy. He can just imagine how nice she’d be with Chris. The way they would lean against each other. The bubbly laugh Chris would make as Peggy licked his face or wagged her tail. Last time Buck had seen him, before the lawsuit, Chris had been begging Eddie for a hamster. He would be so happy to meet Peggy, Buck just knows it. 

But for some reason Buck can’t understand, Eddie’s whole face falls. He turns back to his chili without much enthusiasm. 

“Yeah,” he says, lackluster, “maybe.” 

Buck knows Eddie well enough to know that translates roughly to: yeah. Fuck no. 

He feels his heart fall right through the floor. His entire body deflates. He turns back to his own food, but everything tastes like ash in his mouth now. Why does Eddie hate the idea of his dog meeting his son? Has Eddie always hated dogs? But Buck has told him before about how he used to volunteer at dog shelters, and Eddie never mentioned his distaste for them. 

If Buck has to choose between his best friend and his dog…he’s not sure what to do. He’s only just starting to get Eddie back. But he can’t imagine life now without Peggy. 

Buck pushes his chili around in his bowl and ignores the concerned looks Bobby, Hen, and Chim give him. He doesn’t want to eat any more. His stomach is tied in knots. His bad leg is aching from the rope rescue they did earlier that day, and then standing in the kitchen all evening. 

All he wants to do is go home and cuddle his dog. At least he knows she’ll always be happy to see him.

It’s a few days later, after their forty eight off, that Eddie approaches Buck again. 

They’re sitting in the loft at the station, in between calls. Buck is completely absorbed in the articles he’s reading on his phone, he barely notices the couch shift as Eddie sits down beside them. He does, however, feel the way their knees bump together. His heart starts pounding. 

“What are you reading?” Eddie asks, smooth and nonchalant and Buck thinks, this is it. 

This is the moment where Eddie finally lets him in again. Be cool Buck. Be cool. 

“Reviews on face wash.” Okay. Well. Definitely not suave and cool or at all attractive, but it’s the truth. He clears his throat, “Actually, I’ve been reading about different skin care routines and now I, uh, am looking at face washes. Yeah.” He squeezes his eyes shut as he waits for Eddie's response. Definetly not attractive, he curses himself.

“Oh,” is all Eddie says at first. “...Not reading about South American Otters or something?” He chuckles. Buck relaxes. 

“Giant River Otters are cool, they’re the longest member of the weasel family, but no, that’s not what I’m researching right now.” He admits. 

“Oh so water weasels aren’t cool enough for you anymore? You’re into, anti-aging, Korean skin care now?” Eddie teases, and Buck finally looks at him. He’s smiling softly, leaning back against the couch like he’s all nice and comfortable.

Comfortable around Buck. Finally. 

Buck smiles back and shakes his head. “Nah, you know I don’t care about that.” He leans back against the couch with Eddie, their bodies pressing together from thigh to shoulder in a long line of warmth. Buck’s heart is doing sommersaults in his chest. 

“What I do care about, though, is my face breaking out and being itchy all the time.” Buck complains. Eddie quirks a brow.

“You think it’s coming back to firefighting? All the ash and smoke?” He asks, and he sounds genuienly interested. Buck swallows.

“That’s what I thought too, at first. But then I was on Reddit, looking for gardening tips, and then of course that just spiraled and then I was looking at all sorts of things until I found this page of people with the exact same skin problem.” The whole time he talks, Eddie is just listening and nodding, his whole focus on Buck. It’s a dizzying feeling. He never wants it to end. 

So, of course, it does. 

“Apparently something happens with this chemical reaction between your skin and some types of saliva. So, I didn’t have the problem before because I didn’t have Peggy, but now I do so my skin is reacting to it.” He explains, and then turns back to his phone, ready to launch into a rant about the difference in brands and complain about the outrageous prices.

“Now that you have Peggy?” Eddie questions, his voice unusually high. Buck raises his eyebrows.

“Yeah?”

“And her…uh…saliva?”

Buck smiles a little, “Yeah? It’s not like I can make her stop, you know?”

“What, um…what do you mean?” Eddie leans in, seemingly really concerned. Buck shrugs.

“Well, I know that’s just her way of showing affection, you know? So I’m not going to stop her from licking my face, that just seems mean. Like, I know some people really hate that but she's just so cute I can't bring myself to tell her no.” 

“Licking you— right. Okay. I didn’t know that was uh, something you were into.” Eddie clears his throat and glances away. He shifts away from Buck on the couch and he tries not to mourn the loss of heat. He’s not sure what Eddie’s confused or upset about, but at least he’s not leaving the couch. 

“I wouldn’t say I’m into it?” Buck can’t help his own confusion, “But, like I said I can't really stop her. So I’m just controlling what I can. At first I thought maybe I wasn’t brushing her teeth enough but everything I’ve read says this is totally normal and I should just find new skin care products.” Eddie’s eyes are wide as he stares off into the distance, but he hasn’t left yet so Buck keeps talking. “Look, I’ve even found one that says it’ll help with my birthmark!” He tries to shift the conversation and shows the current face wash pulled up on his page.

“Help with it? What’s wrong with it?” Eddie’s leaning in close again. This literal back and forth is making Buck dizzy. And not in a fun way.

“Nothing’s wrong, I guess. It just gets a bit sensitive sometimes. And this review says it might make it less red. Maybe less noticeable.” 

“Why do you want to make it less noticeable?”

“I don’t know if ‘want’ is really the right word. I don’t really care if it is noticeable, it just might be kind of nice if it wasn’t. I’m kind of tired of people asking if I got punched in the face, you know?” Buck chuckles a little, but Eddie just frowns. 

“I don’t.” He says, his voice serious, firm. “I don’t think you should change it. I like it.”

Buck feels his face turn as pink as his birthmark. “You do?” 

“I do.” Eddie’s face is so open, so genuine. Buck swallows. 

“No one…no one has ever um, complimented it before.” 

“Well, they should.” 

Buck smiles, soft and fluttery. “Thank you.” He says, sincerely. Eddie nods. Then, after a long second of silence where Buck almost goes back to his reading, Eddie opens his mouth again.

“Does…does Peggy think you should change it?” 

Buck screws his whole face up in confusion. “I don’t think she has an opinion, man. She’s a—” 

His confusion is cut short though as the alarm blars through the station and Buck leaps to his feet. “No rest for the wicked!” He declares, and holds his hand out.

Thrillingly, lovely, delightfully, Eddie takes it. The first time he’s taken his hand in weeks. It’s the best feeling in the world. 

“Athena and I want to hold a little get together with everyone next Sunday afternoon, since we all have the day off.” Bobby says one morning. It’s just him and Buck in the kitchen, preparing coffee and breakfast for the crew just like old times. Things finally feel normal again, and Buck couldn’t be happier. 

“That sounds awesome, Bobby! Need me to bring anything?” He asks as he cuts the tomatoes and peppers for this morning’s omletes. 

“Just you, Buck. And, maybe, if you wanted to, that is,” Bobby clears his throat as he fiddles with the coffee machine, “you could bring this Peggy we’ve heard so much about?” 

Buck looks up and blinks, “You sure? She can be kinda rowdy sometimes and I know we’ve all had a busy week.” 

Bobby tilts his head and starts to open his mouth before he hums, seeming to change his mind. “I’m sure, Buck,” he says instead, “if she’s important to you, then she’s important to us.” 

Buck has to look away as his eyes prickle. “She is,” he says, simply. Because she is. Peggy has quickly become the most important thing in his life, and he’s so excited to share her with his family. Bobby puts that heavy, fatherly hand on his shoulder again and Buck feels like he can do anything. 

Sunday rolls around and Buck is running late. For the first time since he got Peggy, the schedule has been thrown off. 

They go for their morning run like normal, and Peggy shows an interest in the park they pass. Buck checks his watch and decides they have some time. He leads her to the fenced in portion for off leash dogs, and lets Peggy really stretch her legs. 

Unfortunately, he doesn’t see the mud pile until it’s too late. Peggy goes bounding through it, splashing mud up in every direction including all of over Buck. 

“Peggy!” He admonishes, and she turns to look at him with her head tilted, tongue lolling, and tail wagging uncontrollably. She’s so happy she’s doing a little tippy tap dance on her three paws. It’s so stinking cute. It also sprays even more mud all over them both.

“She’s so lucky she’s cute, huh?” A passing fellow dog owner sympathises with him. Buck sighs, a smile on his face. 

“Yeah, she sure is adorable.” 

So they cut their run short and head back home, with mud quickly drying and crusting to their skin and fur, respectively. He feels gross, and he definitely can’t show up to Bobby and Athena’s like this. It’s the first 118 get together since Buck came back, and more importantly, it’s the first time his family meets Peggy. He wants her to make a good impression. 

They get home and head straight for the shower. Buck figures it would be easiest to shower them both at the same time, but his shower is a little cramped for that. So he hefts Peggy in first, and she can’t seem to decide if she’s having fun under the nozzle spray or if she needs to defeat it. She barks and trys to bite at it, but then she closes her eyes and pants in bliss under the waterfall. 

Buck laughs through the whole bathtime, even when Peggy decides to shake out her sopping wet fur and send water droplets everywhere. He really doesn’t mind. When she’s finally squeaky clean and smelling like daisies, Buck towels her off the best he can and even brushes her teeth. He’d trimmed her claws last night so she wouldn’t accidentally scratch anyone. 

Deeming her dry enough without using the blow dryer, (he’d learned the hard way how much Peggy hated that thing, and it had taken nearly all day for her to stop pouting or whining at him as if she thought the scary blow dryer was going to come back at any moment.) he sets her up in the living room, basking in the sun, while he takes his own shower.

He cleans himself as fast as he can, and then he has to style his own hair and dab on come cologne. He can’t use his blow dryer anymore, unless he’s at the station, so he’s forced to towel dry his hair and let it curl up. He’s about to try and gel it back when his phone starts ringing from the other room. 

He rushes to grab it and spies the time on the stove as he does. “Oh damn! Peggy! Get your leash!” He calls out and Peggy yelps in excitement. Teaching her to grab her leash is easily the most helpful trick she’s learned so far. He answer’s the phone while he hurries to grab his things.

“ ‘Thena!” He says, knowing who it is without checking. 

“Buckaroo,” Athena is both chuckling and admonishing him, “running late?” 

“Sorry,” Buck shoves the phone between his cheek and shoulder while he puts his shoes on, “I’m so sorry. I’m leaving right now. Peggy ran into some mud on our walk so we had a surprise bathtime.”

Athena is quiet for a second, “Uh-huh,” she has that tone to her voice like she’s piecing something together, but Buck has no idea what. “Now remind me, how old is Peggy?”

At that moment, Peggy comes hobbling over to Buck, her floral print leash dangling in her mouth. “Good job sweetheart!” Buck says to her, to Athena he says, “She’s about ten months? The shelter wasn’t exactly sure but she’s under a year.” 

“Oh, she’s still just a puppy?” 

“Yeah, exactly. So we’re still working on commands and training.” Buck says while he clips Peggy’s leash on with one hand. “I promise she’s usually well behaved, she just get’s a bit excited. She doesn’t jump on anyone or anything and she’s never bit anyone.” 

Athena waves off his assurances with just her voice alone, “I’m not worried about any of that Buckaroo. I know you wouldn’t bring her around unless you thought she was ready.” Her confidence in him makes him feel giddy. “But I am worried about when you two will get here.” 

Buck ushers himself and Peggy out of the door, locking it behind them. “We’re leaving now! Promise! We’ll be there in fifteen minutes I think.” 

“Alright Buck, drive safe. We’ll see you soon.”

“See you soon!” Buck ends the call and shoves his phone in his pocket. Peggy yelps excitedly, tail wagging to be going on another adventure so soon. They head down the hall and into the elevator, where they see one of the neighbor kids, who lights up at the chance to get to pet Peggy. Buck endulges him and then waves goodbye when they get to the ground floor. 

The drive to Bobby and Athena’s is faster than he had predicted, LA traffic on his side for once. Peggy spends the whole drive with her little wet nose pressed against the window of the back seat on the passenger side. They’ve gone on many drives together in the past few weeks, including an hour-long journey to a wonderful nature hike, and Peggy has proven herself as a polite and clever pup.

She seems to understand that Buck is busy in the driver's seat and can’t give her pets. She’s only tried to climb to the front one time, during their first car ride together when he took her home from the shelter. Since, she has apparently figured out that climbing over the center console with only three legs is not easy, and has made peace with chilling in the back seat.

Buck has made the backseat pretty comfy for her, too. (It’s not like anyone else is ever in his car anymore) With towels tucked into the seat cracks, a chew toy next to her seat, and even a small bag tucked under the front seat, full of doggy supplies. Peggy is the queen of the backseat, spoiled and adorable. 

When he gets to Bobby and Athena’s, the driveway and street are packed with cars. Usually, Buck is the first to arrive, last to leave. His Jeep has a near permanent residence on the left side of the driveway. 

Had.

It had a near permanent residence.

And depending how today goes, maybe it can have one again. 

Buck manages to park at the end of the line of cars, just behind Chim and Maddie’s car. 

“Alright, Peg,” Buck says to the dog, who’s already wagging her tail, ears up in excitement, “you ready for this?” 

Peggy barks once and Buck laughs, the anxious knot in his chest loosening. He exits the Jeep and walks around to help her out. He slings her bag of things over his shoulder first, and then picks Peggy up and places her on the ground. The Jeep is just a little too tall for her to jump out on her own yet. 

The sound of laughter and the scent of barbecue is already wafting towards him as he approaches the gate to the backyard. Buck approaches, keeping a strong grip on Peggy’s leash. She’s already pulling on it, wanting to explore. 

“Stay with me Peg,” Buck says, and pats his thigh. Peggy, to her credit, does look back at him as if she’s thinking about listening to him. But then she continues forward, practically yanking him to the gate. Buck rolls his eyes and laughs. 

“Alright! Alright! Hold on! We’re going sweetheart!” He says, a lot louder. On the otherside of the gate, some of the laughter stops. Just as Buck raises his hand to knock, there’s a shout. 

“Buck! Buck! Dad! It’s Bucky!” The voice calls out, and there’s a few voices in response but Buck doesn’t care about them. He only cares about this one. He couldn’t stop the grin spreading on his face if he wanted to. He’d know that little voice anywhere. He feels like he’s going to vibrate out of his skin in excitement. 

The gate swings open, and Athena appears before him. Her smile warm, her eyes twinkling with a knowing look. “Welcome in, Buckaroo. Someone’s excited to see you.” 

She waves him in but he only has time to hand Peggy’s leash over to her before he has to turn and meet the little boy hurtling towards him even with his crutches. 

“Chris!” Buck shouts and crouches down just in time for Christopher to come crashing into his arms. Buck doesn’t waste a minute. He pulls the boy close to his chest, lifts him up, and spins them around, crutches and all. Chris erupts into giggles even while he squeezes the life out of Buck and his crutches smack into Buck’s back.

Buck couldn’t care even if he tried.

“Oh, I’ve missed you Superman,” Buck whispers into Chris’s curly hair, pressing a kiss to his temple. He looks up to see Eddie approaching them. The sun shines bright behind him, surrounding his face with a golden glow. He smiles softly at the scene before him, his arms crossed in front of his chest stretching the material of his green, short-sleeved henley, tight across his biceps. His big biceps. Buck is torn. He wants to sink his teeth into those arms, but he also wants to reach out and yank the man into his embrace. 

More than anything, he wants to hold both Diaz boys close to his heart and never let them go again. 

Chris leans all the way back, trusting Buck to still hold him up.

“I missed you too, Bucky. I’m glad you’re here now, it wasn’t any fun without you.” Chris whispers the last bit like a confession. Buck’s not sure if he means this get together wasn’t any fun, or the past month where Buck wasn’t able or allowed to see him. Either way, Buck gives him another squeeze. Which Chris endulges with a laugh. 

Behind them, Athena clears her throat. Buck turns, Chris still in his arms. She stands before the closed gate, her hands on her hips with the leash wrapped around one wrist. Peggy sits at her feet, gazing up at Athena adoringly, her tail flapping against the ground. The dog is so enthralled by Athena that she hasn’t noticed anyone else. 

Chris, on the other hand, notices Peggy immediately. He gasps, delighted. 

“Buck! Is that YOUR dog??” 

Buck squeezes Chris’s side, “Sure is. Want to meet her?”Chris nods rapidly and Buck dutifully let's him go. Athena hands the leash back to Buck. 

Peggy does her best to be well behaved, but her tail is wagging furiously and her body is shaking in excitement. She really likes kids, and Buck has a feeling she’s going to love Christopher. 

“This is Peggy. Now, put your hand out in a fist so she can smell it and say hi,” Buck introduces and gently guides Chris with a hand on his back. Chris puts his hand out as instructed, and Peggy gives it a good sniff before licking the knuckles. Chris squealed with laughter. 

“That tickles!”

Peggy seems spurred on by Chris’s joy and presses her face into his hand to demand pets. Buck tells the boy where Peggy’s favorite place to get scratches is, (just behind the left ear) and then pretty soon Chris has a lap full of puppy. Not that he seems to be complaining. Chris’s laughter rings out through the whole backyard and that’s when Buck finally looks up to see Eddie staring at them, slack jawed.

He’s never seen Eddie like this before. The tension that has seemed permanent in his body these past few weeks, has completely left his shoulders. The pinched look in his eyes is gone. Over Eddie’s shoulders, Hen and Chim have come to investigate the ruckus, and they both appear just as shocked. 

“What’s wrong?” Buck asks, wondering if he’s forgotten some terrible dog allergy from someone in the 118 family. He doesn’t think he has. 

Suddenly, Chim turns and shouts, “Cap! Did you know that Peggy’s a dog!?” 

From somewhere on the back patio, Buck can’t really see from his spot by the gate, comes a loud clanging sound. As if Bobby got startled at the grill and knocked something over. But why would he be surprised? He knew Buck was coming, didn’t he? Did Bobby…actually not want him here?

Buck pushed the feel down and focused on his friends in front of him. 

“Seriously, guys,” he tried again, “what’s wrong?” He tilts his head in confusion, and next to him he knows Chris and Peggy do the same.

“Yeah Dad,” Chris says, “what’s wrong?” 

Eddie blinks rapidly and seems to find his voice, “Uh…nothing, nothing’s wrong bud. We’re just…excited to meet Peggy. That’s all.” 

Buck watches Eddie’s adams apple bob as he swallows, and then forces himself to look away before he get’s caught staring at Eddie’s neck like a creep. Beside him, Peggy gives a happy little bark, with her head tilted all the way back so she can once again gaze lovingly at Athena. 

“What a sweetheart,” Athena caves and croons, crouching down to give Peggy some proper pats. “You are way cuter than Buckaroo described.” 

“ ‘Thena!” Hen exclaims, now hovering over Eddie’s other shoulder. “You knew?” 

Athena raised her eyebrows, unimpressed, “You didn’t? It seemed pretty obvious.” 

Buck felt like there was a joke happening around him, with details he wasn’t privy to. He bitterly wonders if it has to do with the time he was away from the team, then he forces the thought away. 

“Knew what?” He tried agian, trying to push his nerves back to the pit of his stomach. 

Chim, still wide eyed but grinning exclamed, “You’re girlfriend’s a dog!” 

Around them, laughs erupted from everyone. Well, everyone except for Buck and, as he looked up, Eddie.

Eddie had that look he got sometimes when they all got out of an intense fire. His jaw was loose, his eyes soft around the edges, his shoulders lax. It was a look of utter relief. Buck had no idea why Eddie would be looking at him like that. He felt like he’d just dogded a bullet, but he had no idea where the proverbial shot had come from. 

Finally, Hen shook her head and pulled herself together. “Buck, when you told us about Peggy, you never told us she was a dog.” She explained, “We all thought you had some new, weird, girlfriend.” 

Buck blinks. Suddenly, all the strange things, odd remarks, stilted conversations that happened over the past weeks were all clicking together.

“Oh. Oh! Holy shit!” Buck thought of the looks his teammates had been giving him and burst into uncontrollable laughter. He was laughing so hard he fell back into the grass and, of course, Peggy didn’t waste a second before she was jumping on his chest and licking his face. Her tongue tickled his neck and then he was just laughing harder. 

Because, yeah, wow. If he had a friend telling him that their girlfriend wouldn’t stop licking their face or eating food off the floor or who got upset when there were mailmen on TV, he would have been seriously concerned and confused aswell. 

“Evan!” The ever exhasterbated voice of his sister made him catch his breath and open his eyes. Maddie was standing before him, grinning, with her hands on her hips. It was clear to him now that Chim or someone had been filling her in on Buck’s alleged ‘weird girlfriend’ all this time. The semi-cryptic texts she’d been sending him and the slightly awkward phone call they shared a few days ago all made sense now. He understood now that she’d been fishing for information on this weird girlfriend. Meanwhile, Buck had just been ecstatic that they were talking again. 

“Bring that cutie over here. We all want to say hi.” Maddie helps him to his feet and pulls him further into the back yard, Peggy in tow.

“Buck! Buck! Can we play with Peggy?” Christopher leans agianst Buck as he clambors alongside them. The other kids were all beginning to swarm them, clearly just as interested in the dog as Chris. 

Buck couldn’t stop grinning. Peggy’s tail couldn’t stop wagging. 

For a split second, Buck happened to look back near the gate. Eddie was still standing there. A smile had spread across his face. His hands in his pockets, head titlted just enough that a small strand of his dark hair fell across his forehead. He was devastatingly handsome. Buck’s breath stuttered in his chest and he had to look away. 

Later that night, after Buck ate so much he felt full to bursting, and after everyone had had a turn racing around the backyard with Peggy or playing a round of fetch, Buck finally felt like he had his family back.

He sat on a folding camp chair, a bit of the wiring digging into his back, and he was exatly where he wanted to be. A fire was crackling in the firepit, and he had an armful of little boy snuggling against him. 

Christopher was maybe getting a little too big to be sitting in someones lap while they roasted marshmallows, but no one had dared point that out. The boy had managed to eat one whole gooey, warm, s'more before his eyelids had started to droop. In moments, he was completley conked out in Buck’s lap. 

Buck didn’t mind one bit. 

“He’s really missed you.” 

Buck sucks in a breath and looks over to see Eddie settling into the chair beside him. Conversations were drifting around them, everyone floating in and out of the house as the night wound down. Eddie didn’t seem to notice any of them. His eyes completely focused on his son and Buck.

He had nearly forgotten what it was like to feel the full weight of Eddie’s focus. It still put every nerve in his body on edge. Like an electirc shock to his heart. 

Eddie licks his lips. Buck tracks the movement, then flicks his gaze back up. 

“Buck, I…” Eddie starts, his eyebrows furrowing in concentration, “I wanted to tell you—” 

A whine cut through Eddie’s words and they both looked down in surprise at the dog sitting at their feet. Peggy had her big, round, puppy dog eyes on full display. She bumps her wet nose against Eddie’s pant leg and whines again. 

Buck chuckles, “She wants you to hold her,” he explained, “she gets really clingy at night. You don’t have to, I can tell her to go lay down inside.”

“No, no.” Eddie shakes his head. “It’s okay, I don’t mind. Come here, Princess.” His voice dips low as he cooes and reaches down for Peggy. 

Peg was by no means a small dog, but she was a determined thing. And she was determined to be held by Eddie. Buck could relate. 

Eddie scoops up her lanky body like it’s nothing, pulling her into her lap and settling her against his chest. Peggy snorts a few times before she sighs against him, most definely ready to fall asleep against the hunky firefighter.

Am I jealous of my dog? Buck had the bizarre thought. Unrealated, he should probably go home and get some sleep soon. The festivities of the day had definetly worn him out. He clears his throat. 

“You uh, you were saying?” 

Eddie looked back up, his hand still stroking down Peggy’s flank. His big, wide hand. With the thick fingers and the rough callouses. The freckles along the back of his palm, leading a trail to his wrist, up his arm, under his shirt where surley they dotted along his chest and collarbone. 

That hand. God that hand.

Buck swallows. Eddie leans back in his chair. 

“I wanted to say that…I’m really sorry, Buck.” 

Of all the things Eddie could have said to him in that moment, under the glow of the firelight, an apology was not one he had expected. Buck’s brow furrows in confusion as he wracks his brain for anything Eddie could have done that he would have to apologize for. He came up empty. 

“Sorry for what? You haven’t done anything wrong.” 

Eddie shook his head. “Yes, I have Buck. That day, in the grocery store, I was so angry. Not just about the lawsuit, but about so much and I just took it all out on you. I’m so sorry, Buck. You didn’t deserve that.” 

Buck shifted in his seat. “I kinda did, Eds. I really hurt you, and Chris, and the whole team. I was so concerned with my own feelings and situation I never even stopped to consider how my actions would affect the rest of you. I should be the one apologising, not you.” 

“You’ve already apologized,” Eddie quipped, a smile tugging at his lips. “Several times. It’s starting to loose meaning.”

“Hardy har. I’m serious, I regret what I did. I should have just…talked to you all. Asked for help instead of making a bigger mess of things.”

“Well, I should have noticed you were struggling. I should have been there for you. I’m sorry I wasn’t.”

“You were going through your own shit.” Buck pointed out. Shannon had just died. He’d almost lost Chris in the tsunami. His parents were riding him all the time. 

“And you were there for me through it,” Eddie countered, “I wish I had returned the favor.” 

Realizing they were going to end up talking in circles all night, apologising endlessly, Buck sighs and slumps down in his chair. Against his shoulder, Chris murmured a little in his slip but didn’t wake. He gently brushes the hair off the boys forehead. 

“So we’re both sorry. And we’re both forgiven.” Buck tosses a smile over at his best friend, “Can we go back to the way things were, now?” 

A look passed over Eddie’s face so quickly that Buck didn’t have time to decipher it. But it left him straight backed and with a glossy gleam in his eyes. He nodded, though, and his mouth formed a soft, fond smile. 

“Of course we can.” He said. His eyes glance down at the dog in his arms, then at the boy in Buck’s, then he nods towards the back gate. “Wanna head home? Put these ones to bed?” 

Now Buck’s heart was really doing somersaults. Eddie said it like it was so normal, like nothing bad had happened between them. As if things really were back to how they used to be. Like it was a completely normal thing for Buck to follow Eddie home so they could put Chris to bed together and share a beer and go to sleep under the same roof. 

A preassure built up behind his eyelids. This was everything Buck had been missing, all this time. Everything his heart had wanted. 

Well. Nearly everything.  

Not trusting his voice, he could only nod. 

Together, they carefully scooped up their charges and whispered goodbye to their family. Who, of course, all cooed appropriately and Maddie even managed to snag a few photos of Chris in Buck’s arms, and Peggy in Eddie’s. 

“She is so spoiled,” Athena noted, shaking her head and smiling at the snuggly pup. 

Eddie just shrugged. “What can you do? She’s a princess.” 

Buck’s grin was going to freeze on his face, he was sure. 

They managed to get Chris buckled into Eddie’s truck and then after a short burst of bickering, Peggy also went into the passanger seat of the truck. Eddie gently pet her head and leaned down to press the softest kiss against her fluffy cheek. Peggy stired a little, only to blink lazily up at Eddie and thump her tail twice, before falling back asleep. 

Buck, ridiculous and well past the point of no return in his hopeless crush on his best friend, was once again stupidly jealous of his own dog. What had his life become? 

“You’ll follow us home?” Eddie asked, although it sounded more like a state of fact rather than a question. He leaned against the open door, his head titled just so once again. A warm breeze went genlty passed them, rustling Eddie’s hair. The faint amber light from the porch glittered in Eddie’s warm, dark eyes. 

Buck could only nod again. His breath stolen. 

Eddie smiled, satisfied. He reached out a hand and did something he never had before; he pressed his palm against Buck’s cheek and rubbed his thumb gently over the birthmark above his eye. The skin of Eddie’s hand was just as Buck had imagined. Warm, all encompassing in the wide width and heavy weight of his palm. Callouses bloomed along the bumps and ridges and the rough drag against the sensitive skin of Buck’s face was completely intoxicating. 

Now he really couldn’t breathe. 

“Drive safe, okay?” Eddie whispered. Again, it wasn’t a question. It toed the line of a command. His face closer than before. Buck could feel the heat of his breath. He could smell the sweetness from the s’more Eddie had stolen right off of Buck’s plate earlier that night. 

His stomach flipped in his gut. His toes curled. He was so fucked. He could only nod again. And Eddie, that stupid, lovely, smug bastard, (who had to know what he was doing, right?) his satisfied smile melted into a little smirk that Buck knew well. It was that smirk he made when he knew he was right about something. Like he’d solved some complicated issue and was now waiting for Buck to come to the same conclusion just so Eddie could brag about getting there first. 

Buck loved that smirk. 

Eddie pulls his hand away and steps back. Buck feels the embarassing urge to whimper or whine. His head was spinning, his face hot. Maybe he really should just head back to his own apartment and get some rest. 

But then Eddie closes the truck door and glances back at him, one eyebrow raised. Buck felt his face flush and he steps back. 

“See you there,” he manages to say. His voice only a little high pitched. Eddie looks positively gleeful as he shook his head. Buck chooses to ignore that and head to his own car. 

It only took a few deep breathes for Buck to settle his nerves inside the safety of his Jeep. When Eddie put his truck in drive and began heading down the street, Buck was able to follow behind. They got seperated by a few other cars on the highway, so by the time Buck was pulling into the familar spot on the street, Eddie was already carrying Chris out fo the car. 

Peggy seemed to have roused herself enough to be nosing around on the grass curiously. The handle of her leash wrapped around Eddie’s hand even as he balanced Chris and his crutches. Buck hurried out of the Jeep and over to them, taking the crutches without a word. 

Inside, Eddie sets Chris down gently on the couch just so he could wake him. Chris grumbles as he wakes, rubbing his eyes. Eddie only chuckles, “You have to take a bath before bed, buddy.” 

Chris frowns, but when his eyes catch on Buck and Peggy in the room, he grins. “Bucky!” He cheers, now wide awake. “Are you sleeping over?” 

“Uhh,” Buck cast a glance at Eddie, still crouched in front of Chris. Eddie only quirks his eyebrow and Buck knows it means, up to you, so he says, “Yeah! I was thinking I could make pancakes in the morning.”

Chris cheers again, then puts on his own display of puppy dog eyes. “Can Peggy stay with me in my room?”

Again, Buck glances at Eddie just to see the same look still on his face. “Sure,” Buck says, “if she wants too. But, you have to get cleaned up and ready for bed first. Those are the rules.” 

Chris is clearly displeased with the terms, but he grumbles, “Okaaaay,” dragging out the last vowel with a sass that Buck was pretty certain he didn’t have the last time he spent the night at the Diaz house. The kid really was growing up fast. 

“Be right back,” Eddie says and winks. Like, actually, really winks at Buck and all he can do is nod in response again as Eddie and Chris head down the hall to get ready for bed. When they’ve disappeared into the bathroom, the door shut behind them, Buck is left standing in the livivng room. Peggy nudges his leg and whines. 

“I know, girl,” he says, because he’s utterly hopeless, “I miss them already, too.” 

He shakes himself out of his slightly stupified state and unhooks Peggy’s leash. She wanders around the house, sniffing things and checking everyhting out while he takes off his shoes and jacket. As she walks, he notices the little trail of dirt she leaves behind. He curses under his breath as he sweeps up after her. 

The kitchen sink makes an impromptu bath, where Buck wets some paper towels and wipes down Peggy the best he can.

“How do you always do this?” He muses aloud. There’s dirt stuck in between the toes of her paws. He very gently massages it out with some warm water. “There we go, sweetheart. That must feel better.” 

Indeed, Peggy seems more comfortable by the second. A giant yawn takes over her little puppy face and ends in a soft ruff sound. Buck chuckles and smatters kisses all over her face. Peggy licks his chin in response. 

Behind them, a throat is cleared. Buck only jumps a little bit before he turns and smiles back at Eddie, watching them from the doorway with a soft smile. 

“Someone wants to say goodnight,” he says. 

“Oh! Sure, yeah. Let me just dry her off,” Buck pats Peggy’s wet fur dry with a fresh paper towel. “She tracked some dirt in, which I already cleaned up, so don’t worry. But I figured I should clean her up so she doesn’t get anything in Chris’s bed. I swear, she’s like a dirt and leaves magnet. I feel like I have to give her a bath after every walk.” 

“Always getting into messes?” Eddie asks as Buck scoops up Peggy and sets her on the floor.

He laughs, “Yeah, exactly.” 

“Hmm. Sounds like someone else I know.”

Eddie’s voice is so low and soft as he says it, dripping with fondness. Buck stands up straight, his face heating, but Eddie has already turned back down the hall. Peggy immedialty trails after him, hopping away on her three legs. Buck is helpless to do anything but follow.

In Christopher’s room, Peggy jumps up onto his bed immediatley. Chris starts to giggle but is interuppted by a great big yawn. Peggy snuggles up against him, and Chris throws a little arm over her. 

“Goodnight, mijo.” Eddie bends down to kiss both of them on the forehead, then steps back to let Buck do the same.

“Night, buddy. Sleep tight.” 

Chris yawns again, his eyes drooping closed. “Night, night daddy, Bucky. An’ Peggy.” He mumbles as sleep takes over him once again. 

Buck and Eddie grin at eachother as they both creep back out of the room. Not before Buck can take a few pictures of the sleeping duo on his phone.

“Send those to me,” Eddie whispers, practically in his ear as Buck shuts the door behind them. Lightning zips down his spine as he nods. 

How is Eddie able to strip him of his speech so easily? So effortlessly? By the looks of that wicked smirk returning to Eddie’s face, he must know. Surely, he must know by now the effect he has on Buck. But what does that mean for them? Does he understand how serious, how deep, Buck’s feelings are for him? Does he understand that Buck is in love with him? Truly, deeply, irrevocebly, in love with him? 

Buck has spent so much time away from Eddie, wallowing in the hurt he caused himself. Regreting his actions, wishing things were different and imagining what it would be like if they were. If Buck had never filed that stupid lawsuit, Eddie and him would have just kept getting closer and closer as Buck spent more days and nights at the Diaz house than his own place. If they had been able to have just one more night together, sitting on the couch, pressing their legs together and talking about everything and nothing at all. 

They had gotten so close, right before everything blew up in their faces. Buck has spent so much time thinking about it and he’s pretty certain that all it would have taken was one more night together for him to finally kiss Eddie Diaz stupid. 

Eddie leads him into the living room and tells him to sit down. He does. 

Eddie diappears into the kitchen and returns with two cold beers. He hands one to Buck and tells him to drink. He does. 

Buck's heart is hammering in his chest. Eddie could ask anything of him right now at this moment and Buck would do it. He really would. He sips on his beer, just to give himself something to do. Next to him, sitting so close their thighs press together, Eddie picks at the label of his own bottle. 

“Buck,” he starts, “there’s something I want to tell you.” He sets his bottle down on the coffe table. 

“Sure. Anything.” Buck says, definetly giving away more than he means. He ignores the way Eddie’s lips quirk up and takes another sip instead, looking away. 

“Buck,” Eddie whispers, his voice suddenly a little rough. Buck turns back, startled, to find Eddie leaning in close, his eyes staring intently at him. They flicker from his face to his throat as Buck swallows and then at his hands as Buck holds onto the bottle a little tighter and then they flick back to his face, his lips. Eddie reaches out and takes the drink away from Buck’s trembling hands. He sets it on the table.

“I wasn’t completely honest, earlier.” 

The words reach Buck’s ears as if they were coming from another room. It takes him a moment to process, too caught up in the intense heat of Eddie’s gaze. 

“What?” He asks. 

“Earlier. At Bobby and Athena’s. When you said you wanted things to go back to the way they were.” 

Eddie’s words bring Buck back to the surface, finally comprehending. His stomach rolls again, this time with the familiar sinking feeling. His throat stings. 

“Oh?” He forces out. Eddie nods. 

“I said I wanted that too. But, that’s not true.” 

Buck might really pass out. He’s starting to feel dizzy. His head is reeling. What did Eddie want from him? He couldn’t keep up. He pulled back, putting space between their bodies. He turned his face away to look down at the floor. 

“That’s okay,” his throat squeezes as the words slip out, “we can— If you want some time, some space that’s uh, that’s alright. It’s okay I can—” 

Rough and sudden, a hand grips the back of his neck and turns him around. Buck gasps at the unexpected force, only to have the gasp swallowed by Eddie crashing his lips against Buck’s. 

Buck whimpers as all the tension leaks out of him and he melts against Eddie, who just swallows that noise in his greedy mouth, too. It’s not at all what Buck imagined it would be like. It’s hot, and heavy, and Eddie’s lips are a little dry but he tastes a bit like mint as if he just brushed his teeth. Buck is torn between wanting to laugh because, yes, Eddie defiently brushed his teeth earlier because he was planning to kiss Buck tonight, but he also wants to dig his hands in Eddie’s hair and maybe shove his tongue down his best friend's throat. 

Before he can decide what to do next, Eddie pulls back, panting. 

“Would you,” he swallows hard, his lips already red, “just slow down a second and let me finish before you jump to the worst case scenario?” Eddie laughs, bright and beautiful before he goes on. 

“I was trying to say that I don’t want things like they were before, I want something new. I want something more with you, Buck.” 

Buck’s tongue feels like a weight in his mouth. He’s not sure what to do with that. No one’s ever wanted more of him. Not ever. He was always too energetic, too loud, too clingy, too much of a mess. He can’t believe someone, anyone, but especailly someone as wonderful and brilliant and beautiful as Eddie, would really want more of him.

“Oh,” he manages, his voice rough and thick, “really?” 

Eddie’s eyes crinkle at the corners as his lips tug upwards and his voice is full of sweet affection as he says, “Yeah, really. I’m kinda in love with you, Evan.” 

Now it’s Buck who takes hold of Eddie and yanks him into a fierce kiss. He doesn’t know how else to express all of the want, all of the desire, all of the childhood wishes of being chosen and loved bubbling out of his skin as Eddie makes all of it come true. In a single instant. Like it’s that easy. 

Maybe it is, Buck thinks, as his hands craddle Eddie’s face softly and his tongue skims over those thick lips. Eddie opens for him, easily. Letting him in. Maybe it is that easy. 

Eddie’s hands roam Buck’s body like they’re searching for someone. It lights Buck’s nerves on fire. One hand finds purchase on his thigh. Fingers splayed wide sending burning heat through the fabric of his jeans. The other moves upwards, over the broadness of his shoulders and scraping those callouses across the delicate skin on the back of his neck before tangling in his hair. Eddie tugs on his curls, and the pleasure-pain that shoots down through his scalp makes him whimper again. 

Eddie swallows the noise once more, then tugs again. Greedy.

Buck gives it to him, already understanding how much Eddie likes to hear him, and isn’t that enough to send him spinning again? Eddie likes hearing him make those pathetic little sounds full of desire and pent up tension. 

He wants to hear Eddie, too. Would he make sounds like Buck? Small and a little begging? No, Buck doesn’t think so. He thinks it’d be louder. Deeper. More gruttal, akin to a growl. A demand. 

He nips at Eddie’s lips and pulls away, just to see. 

The sound of displeasure that rips out of Eddie as he chases Buck’s lips is exactly as he pictured. It makes the back of his brain buzz delightfully.

“I love you, too,” he blurts out, suddenly needing to make that clear. “Like, a fuckton. So much it makes me feel ridiculous. Like, really, I’d do anything for you. Well, you and Christopher. I want to spend every day with you. I want to keep building our life together and grow our family and wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep next to you every night and to be by your side at work all of the time.” He gasps, out of breath from his rambling declration. 

Eddie blinks in front of him. Visibly stunned. Buck’s heart twists. 

“Sorry,” he says, his face aflame, “that was too much, wasn’t it? I’m sorry I-I just got excited. I’ve just been thinking about this alot so, you know.” He wants to shrink back into the couch. He starts to squirm, ready to pull away if this is what does it. If this is what makes Eddie realize that Buck really is too much. But the grip on Buck’s thigh, and the one still on the back of his head, just grows tighter. He gasps as he’s pulled closer. 

“Don’t even think about pulling away,” Eddie mutters, “stay put.” he presses his forehead against Buck’s, “I just need to catch my breath.” 

Now Buck is the one stunned in place. His hands have drifted down to Eddie’s shoulders, and he slides them around his neck instead. Keeping him close. 

“Catch your breath?” He whispers, in slight disbelief. Against him, Eddie nods. His eyes shut tight. Buck can count every eyelash from right here. Every freckle and mole that decorates his face and seems to call Buck to lean over and kiss each one. There’s a small one, just on the outer corner of his left eye, that’s deeply tempting Buck. But Eddie told him to stay put so he’s damn well going to stay put. 

“Yeah,” Eddie huffs, sounding like a laugh. “The man of my dreams just verbalized everything I’ve ever wished for. I need a minute.” 

It’s offical. Buck’s brain is fried. He’s done for. Completley gone. Just a lump of mush. 

“Oh,” the sound of disbelief falls from his mouth without meaning to. Then, his broken brain snags on one thing and he feels a little hysterical. He giggles a little, his body buzzing with energy. 

Eddie cracks open one eye and Buck grins. “I’m the man of your dreams?” 

 A short burst of pain erupts from his side as Eddie pinches him. Buck yelps in startlement, then frowns in annoyance as Eddie’s hand is now clutching his side instead of his thigh. It’s nice where it is, sure, but Buck rather liked it where it was before. 

Eddie doesn’t seem to notice as he whispers, “Ay dios mio, what am I going to do with you?” Then he presses the sweetest, most tender kiss against Buck’s birthmark. His body melts into Eddie’s capable hands. 

“Keep me forever,” he murmurs. Maybe he begs a little. Eddie smiles. Not his smug smirk, not his contagious grin. His soft, gentle smile that he saves only for the softest and quietest moments. 

“Oh, I intend to.” The promise leaves Buck completely limp and desperate. He tugs Eddie back to him and captures his lips. The kiss is slower than before. The heat is still burning between them, but Buck understands now that they have time. They have all the time in the world. 

Eddie has just pressed Buck down against the couch cushion, climbing on top of him as Buck lays his head against the arm rest, when Eddie suddenly tears his lips away. He pushes his face into Buck’s shoulder, his body shaking and Buck starts to worry before he realizes that Eddie is laughing. 

“What?” Buck tugs on Eddie’s shoulder, a little offended. Nothing funny was happening, thank you very much. It was all very tender and loving and passionate. No funny buisness at all. 

Eddie pulls back and shakes his head, “Sorry, sorry!” He swallows his laughter and takes a deep breath. When he looks down at Buck, he’s grinning, a little madly. 

“It’s just,” he giggles again, “just that, this morning, I was fully convienced that you had some weird girlfriend with some really intense kinks and I was going to have to go to that barbeque and play nice and try not to let my jealousy consume me and, the whole time, it was just your dog.” 

Now Buck snorts, and then Eddie starts laughing again, and then they’re both heaps of giggles on the couch as the day's events really catch up to them. Buck thinks back to that day in the loft at work, when he was talking about Peggy licking his face so much that he was breaking out, and he absolutely loses it all over again. He can’t even form the words, and he doesn’t need to. They both laugh uncontrollably while also shushing eachother. Christopher is still asleep, after all. 

When they catch their breath again, Eddie lays his head down on Buck’s chest like he’s done it a million times already. Buck nearly takes back what he thought earlier that night. Sure, being craddled against Eddie’s chest probably feels great. But, wrapping his arms around Eddie and holding him against his own heart is pretty damn good, too. 

He runs his hand up Eddie’s back and threads his fingers through the strands of his hair. Eddie sighs contentedly against him. 

“ ‘M sorry it took so long for us to get here,” Eddie murmurs. 

“I’m not,” Buck whispers back, “we had a lot of shit to sort through. I think we’re right on time.” 

Eddie’s arms tighten around Buck’s waist. “I love you.” The words vibrate against Buck’s skin. He leans down to kiss the head craddled against him. 

“I love you, too.”

And he does.

They do.

It’s perfect.

It happened by accident.

It happened just the way it was meant too. 

Buck should really buy Peggy a great big doggy bone as thanks for bringing them together.