Work Text:
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...
I never was one to need much in a relationship, I only needed a few things. The regular things! Like genuine love, emotionally available, mutual understanding, mutual respect, consent, and most importantly, respect for boundaries.
Outside of that, I'm fine with most things.
Now let me, a lonely little freak, tell you about my little tale...
~~~
Pierrot was waiting outside at my window like a puppy waiting for its owner at the door.
I've honestly been more distant to them even since Harlequin tried to flirt with me. I didn't really mind the obvious crush at first, but things started getting weird when he opened my front door and walked in like it was normal, it indeed was not normal. His ticket man was gonna basically send people after me if I didn't come into the circus that night, and I found out some things from Harlequin...
I mean, what did I expect? It was called the freak circus, but I thought that meant like freaky like scary, not... Gross.
Harlequin and I haven't spoken either, I stopped crossing them as much, changed my schedule and position just to avoid both the weirdos. Usually I love weird, I love niche little topics, new ideas, etc., but THIS?… Yeah no.
~~~
I was simply doing my boring career, filling up coffee cups with the deep bitter liquid that regular customers desired—personally I never really got how these people liked such bitter beverages, but who am I to judge when it’s how I get paid?
…Tap…Tap…
It was barely even audible over the stupid coffee machine, I glanced over and— of course, of fucking course it was Pierrot, just staring with puppy eyes.
~~~
“What is it, Pierrot?” I sighed out, unimpressed by his attempt to look sorry.
He leaned in to whisper, but I stepped back and shook my head no.
“I told you to stop coming to my workplace,”
Pierrot just gave me an expression that was a mix of sadness and annoyance, did this guy not take the hint?
“Can you leave now, you’re disrupting my work?” I rolled my eyes and walked away when he just stared at me dumbfounded that I actually had the courage to ask him away.
I simply just shut the window and turned back to my work, practically fuming as I thought about what an IDIOT that man must be.
~~~
What did Pierrot expect, I’m not gonna keep entertaining him when he can’t tell me what’s going on. He didn’t tell me about Columbia after that night, he promised he’d make sure she came back safe afterwards— she still hasn’t shown up to work. I haven’t even seen her in town, and he keeps withholding information. I’m not going to continue this nonsense with someone who didn’t just lie, but he broke into my house!
I don’t know, that just makes me feel uneasy to know he could enter my home so easily, what if I went home and fell asleep?
…Would he still have entered?
…
…Has he entered while I’ve been asleep?
I don’t wanna think about that.
Nope.
Nope.
NOPE.
Fuck, great, now that’s gonna be one of those haunting thoughts I wonder every night before I shut my eyes.
I heard the front bell jingle and a familiar voice, and I felt absolutely done with the day as the new Cashier started to greet Harlequin.
~~~
“Hello there, sir, what can I get for you today?”
“I need your coffee boy back there, I know he’s here today, I saw him walk in earlier”
“…Sorry— who?” The new staff member tried to play dumb, that was pretty obvious from their tone sounding so squeaky.
“His name is Asher, brunette, wears those hello kitty glasses, and tries to—“
“Okay, okay, I get it, I know who he is, I’ll see if he wants to,”
“Tell him it’s Harley,”
…
“Hey Ash, some dickhead needs you upfront,” the cashier dropped their act quite quickly, was that a new record for quickest mood swap?
“I heard, tell him I’m busy,” I replied, adding a design to a customer’s order for the servers.
“M‘Kay, with what this time?” They questioned, I suspect they noticed my
I paused before saying, sounding not even sure what there was I could be busy with, “Inventory…?”
“Sounds good, keep doing your “inventory”,” The cashier shrugged and walked back to the front.
“I will,” I mumbled, turning back to the orders.
…
“Sorry sir, but Asher is busy,” The Cashier said
“No, they’re not”
“Yes, he is, right now he is doing inventory”
“His car is still outside, so that’s a lie”
“He just prefers walking—“ And that was a COMPLETE lie. I have not left my house in FOUR MONTHS outside of for work and groceries and my pill refill. This dude is lying.
“Nice joke. Where is he.” Harlequin forced a smile.
“He’s busy doing inventory.”
“No he isn’t, are you trying to—“
“Sir, either you can order or I’ll get you the manager.”
Please get the manager either way, man…
“Psh fine, I’ll wait.”
“Sir, we don’t let weird circus people in unless they buy something, so either 30 bucks or get out.”
“What do you think I am? Rich? I work in a circus,”
Yeah??? Yeah I do??? Have you looked in a mirror, your cologne literally smells like rich people.
“No sir, I assure you I think you’re broke, but that’s the price for our coffee” The cashier answered with the most sincere tone.
I tried not to snicker, but I ended up spilling some hot coffee on my hand because I got distracted from the scene, not my fault, it’s fine though.
“Thirty for coffee?”
“Pay or leave, I could care less…”
“Fine, fine, I’ll pay” Harlequin took out thirty bucks reluctantly.
“Cool, are you gonna tip?”
“No?”
“Wow… Do you know how much we’re paid here? Only—“
“Ok, I get it, I’ll tip.”
“Great, how much?”
“I’ll make it twenty if you get me Asher”
The cashier gave an annoyed look and walked behind the bar to me.
“ASHER, I CANNOT LOSE TWENTY BUCKS. PLEASE, I’LL GIVE YOU TEN.”
“No???”
“Dude, you can buy six of those chocolate fudge icing things you like so much.”
“Make it 15.” And so the bargaining began…
“13.”
“14.”
“13.50”
“13.75.”
“Fine, 13.75” The cashier reluctantly agreed, I gave a nod and walked to the front.
~~~
“Hey Asher—“
“Twenty bucks now,” the cashier held their hand out.
“Fine, is that seriously all you wanted?” Harlequin forked over a twenty.
“I want ten since you bothered me so much,” I said, as if I wasn’t gonna get that 13.75 later.
Listen if I could get MORE chocolate fudge frosting later after this shift? I will take that opportunity, I may be stupid, but I do know I want to make those 7 frostings to 10 frostings.
I was too busy fantasizing about eating frosting later to notice Harlequin talking, I had put in ear plugs earlier to block out some of the yelling from customers, I could still hear, but I preferred to ignore others since they were annoying.
~~~
“Are you even listening?” Harlequin huffed, crossing his arms.
“No?” I wasn’t even gonna lie bro, I don’t give a crap about this weirdo.
“Ugh, now i have to repeat myself to you all over again!”
“No, you don’t, I’m not gonna listen, man.” Does bro think I care? I don’t, like… yall are just obsessed, leave me the fuck alone?
“Well I want to, so listen!”
As if I am. I’m already back to blushing about the idea about my dollar tree chocolate fudge frosting… oh frosting how I love you, I think I started shedding a tear because the cashier looked at me weird, I was genuinely over here crying about frosting, but I didn’t cry about my fish dying? Priorities are crazy. Am I just glazing frosting? Yes. Yes I am.
“Uh Asher, are you okay?” The cashier asked, interrupting Harlequin’s yap session.
“I’m great, dude…” I choked out, I just really want that frosting
“You sure, because you’re… crying? Is it about the frosting—“
“What about frosting now?” Harlequin asked.
Right, bro didn’t know about my addiction.
“He has a crippling addiction, he hasn’t ate it in a month now.” My coworker explained as if it were the most normal thing. Which for us? It was.
“I NEED IT.” I whined loudly and flopped onto the floor dramatically,
“Uhm… sure, hunny-“
“don’t call him hunny.”
“Jealous much?” The cashier asked before tugging my sleeve and telling me to get up.
I pulled myself up and told them, “I’m gonna go back to work man…”
“Sounds good”
“Wait no—“
I was already in the back, and had three orders to finish. I hate this stupid job man…
~~~
Pierrot was waiting for me outside after my shift. Oh my gosh bro…
~~~
“Hi Asher—“
“I’m not in the mood.”
“Okay”
He still was following me, I don’t know why because I didn’t invite him to, and didn’t really want him to, but whatever I guess dude…
“Are you mad at me?”
“Do you want me to be?”
“No…? Are you though?”
“Now I am,”
“Sorry”
“No— it’s fine, I’m being a jerk, it’s my bad,” I sighed before apologizing, “I’m sorry dude.”
…
“Asher?” Pierrot quietly began— that’s how I knew that he was about to ask the most irritating question.
“What is it, man,” I forced myself to not sound mad.
“Have you eaten today?”
…”Yep” I hadn’t, I ate breakfast yesterday but I’ve been too busy to actually use my lunch break for lunch, I’ve been doing errands.
“Promise?”
“I promise”
I had already broken our promise. I think Pierrot knew that, just didn’t wanna mention it… Probably because he knew I’d get defensive and mad.
~~~
Pierrot continued to linger beside me while I walked, occasionally he’d speak or check the time, but I never thought much of it, I just wanted to go home.
~~~
“Hey Darling?” Pierrot used a pet name to refer to me.
“Yes, Pier?” I simply returned the favor, his face slightly flushed at the nickname.
He reached into his pocket and handed me a small velvet gift box.
“An offering, my dear,” Pierrot spoke in a hushed tone as if it were something wacky.
Who calls gifts ‘offerings’ nowadays, unless he’s one of those crazy religious people or a murderer then what the fuck is an offering. I mean I can’t complain, no one really gives me gifts unless it’s my birthday… That sounds sad, whatever, just take the stupid gift, Asher.
I took too long internally yapping to notice that Pierrot was looking at me worried— yeah, that’s my bad.
“Sorry, I’m just not used to people actually gifting me anything,” I felt my face burning while Pierrot happily placed the box in my hands.
“Eh? Aren’t there like a hundred and one holidays of people gifting each other stuff,”
“Nope, and usually people only do that for kids or their close ones”
“Are you not close to anyone?”
I opened my mouth to reply but closed it, knowing that I wasn’t really too close with anyone, I really did fuck my relationships with my family and past-friends. I know that it was my fault, I should’ve been more available, open, and honest, but instead I got upset and hurt and I embarrassed myself by crying—
“Ash?” Pierrot questioned with a single word.
“Hm?”
“Will you come to my performance tomorrow?”
“I’ll consider,” lie. I was not considering, I knew I was going to choose staying home.
“Good, are you going to open my offering?”
“Oh yeah, sure, man,” Right, duh, just open the box, I carefully took off the top, inside was a tub of frosting.
I couldn’t even speak, just stared at Pierrot— I don’t know if he could tell loud feeling I felt inside right now.
Pierrot gave a smile to me at my staring, I gave a quick glance before looking to the floor, feeling my face flush, I had to try so hard not to cry and hug him.
I still waved him off when I got closed home, entering and quickly rushing t— oh?
An apple and a granola bar were taken out and laid on my desk, which usually I wouldn’t mind but the only thing was:
I didn’t leave those there this morning.
…
~~~