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Your annoying neighborhood suicidal maniac

Summary:

a kunizai spiderman AU where Kunikida is spiderman and has to save Dazai from one of his his suicide attempts (again)

Notes:

idk if this will be any good so mb if it's ahh.. it's midnight but I NEED to write about about this au. Oh also no beta read cause I'm sleepy as hell so there might be some mistakes.

also quick reminder that English isn't my first language so my grammar may be weird at times..

This au is set in New York just like in the spiderman movie, and Dazai and Kunikida are both 20 here!!

Work Text:

30 floors.

.
.
.

30 floors left until Dazai reaches the top of the building from which he will jump.

.
.

20 floors until he finally has that sweet release of death right within his reach.

.

10 floors until he gets to see New York's favorite hero, and most importantly,
his favorite hero.

Ding!

Zero floors until the elevator doors open to a dark hallway with a small flight of stairs. The wind howls into the night as each gust violently slams the rain against the metal door which leads to the rooftop.
Dazai, who had somehow obtained the keys to open that very same door, climbs up those stairs and unlocks it, Immediately met with the cold slap of the ruthless storm right in his face. But that didn't stop the man, as he walks through the door onto the rooftop. The wind blowing so hard you'd almost think it wants to push Dazai off the rooftop itself.

Dazai has been in the situation of ending his life a few times before, ever since he's left the mafia.
Two of those times he actually meant to take his life... The other two times was not to actually end himself, but to get to see that one superhero again. The one that saved his live the first two times when he actually wanted to kill himself.

Spiderman.

Oh how Dazai just loved it when he was drowning in some river, or jumping off some building, only to get scooped up right into those strong arms.
...Well, that happened once. The other times he was either pulled out the water from spiderman's web like some kind of fish, or he'd fall into a sticky spiderweb. Yeah... not exactly the most elegant way of being saved.

But that didn't matter, as the idea of being saved by Spiderman has been an even more exciting thought lately, than the thought of actually dying.

Dazai has been studying the patterns of when Spiderman is out patrolling by checking the New York Times, the daily news and the radio for mentions of Spiderman saving the day.
Based on those studies, he figured that Spiderman must probably be a college student, as he was nowhere to be found during school hours and midnight. Sure maybe Spiderman could've been an older man in the workplace, which had similar hours to college, but Dazai has heard Spiderman's voice before and it was obviously a person in their early twenties.

Having studied Spiderman's whereabouts and patrolling, he knew Spiderman would be near by now.
Dazai walks up to the ledge of the building, listening to the sound of the rain and thunder, and the police sirens echoing throughout all of New York.

He takes one deep breath, and then... jumps.

 

woosh... woosh...

Kunikida pulls himself forward from building to building, shooting his web in front of him each time. The sound of the rain hitting his red suit is like white noise at this point, as he's been hearing that all evening since he left campus to patrol around the city.

He is so tired.

His suit has some cuts in it from a fight he had earlier with a group of men that tried to kidnap a poor businessman due to some conflict in between organizations. Sure, Kunikida won, but he didn't leave unharmed.
Worst thing is, that when he gets home he can't go straight to bed to rest, cause he still has a damn chemistry assignment to work on.

But his tired state did not decrease his spider senses. His eyes snap to his right as he notices a figure standing at the ledge of a building, and he doesn't need to look twice to know who it could be.

The familiar figure of Dazai Osamu drops from the building, falling down even faster than the rain surrounding him.

Kunikida wastes no time as he launches himself towards the falling man, his heart shooting up to his throat from the adrenaline.
He has to save Dazai. No matter how many times he has to do it again.

Dazai smiles as he looks at the street getting closer, and closer, not even a little bit stressed. He has no need to be, because at any given second...

Two familiar arms wrap around him.

Dazai's heart immediately picks up speed the moment he felt Spiderman holding him. This went exactly according to plan and Dazai loves it. He wraps his arms around Spiderman's waist and holds on tight as if he actually gives two shits about not falling to death.

They go down further while hanging from Spiderman's web until the eventually reach the street and Spiderman safely put Dazai on the sidewalk.
"Next time I'm letting you drop." Spiderman lied to Dazai, who was looking completely drenched. The moment Spiderman's two feet hit the floor, he immediately prepared to leave through the nearby alley.
"Hey!.. wait!" Dazai exclaimed with a surprised look as Spiderman already moved to leave. Quickly, he runs into the same alley Spiderman went into.

Wait... where did Spiderman go? Dazai thought, before he suddenly saw something hanging in the corner of his eye. He turns around to see Spiderman hanging upside down.

Dazai smiles and walks up to Spiderman. "You're leaving already? I was hoping for a little chit-chat at least~"

"I have no time for chit-chat... I have a schedule to follow and chatting with you is not in it." Kunikida answered bluntly.

"Then why are you still here?" Dazai asked, only getting silence in return as Kunikida has no idea how to answer that. Why was he still here? Dazai's eyes go to the few cuts on Spiderman's muscular frame. He couldn't lie, Spiderman looked kinda hot all roughed up like this, but he must be really tired though, so Dazai decides to show mercy to the hero and doubles down instead.

Dazai only chuckled a bit in amusement at the silence from Spiderman.
"Well, if you're not willing to talk... can I at least thank you for saving me again?" Dazai asked in a quieter tone, stepping a bit closer to the man hanging upside down in front or him.

"Sure... go ahead." Kunikida said in an almost whispery tone as he couldn't take his eyes off Dazai, who doesn't seem to mind being absolutely drenched. Dazai looked kind of pretty in the low streetlights, and the wet strands of hair hanging in front of his face... wait what?

Dazai reaches up... his slender fingers finding the edge of Spiderman's mask and began rolling it down, slowly revealing Spiderman's neck, followed by his chin, and then finally his lips...

Dazai takes a moment to take in the sight of the rain droplets covering the soft pink lips of this unknown superhero that saved his life 5 times already. The mystery of new york. The Spiderman. But then he remembered he can't waste too much time, as Spiderman was clearly in a bit of a hurry.

He places one hand on spiderman's cheek and leans in...

Dazai then softly presses his lips onto Spiderman's lips, earning a quiet, surprised gasp from the hero whose heart just felt like it exploded into fireworks. To Dazai’s surprise, Spiderman actually kisses back, softly moving his lips in synch with Dazai's.

In that moment, the world didn't exist. It was just the two of them, right in this rainy alley, kissing each other. And God does it feel amazing, immediately removing all the stress that Kunikida felt earlier.

After some seconds of making out, Dazai pulls back, smiling at Spiderman while pulling the mask back over his face and neck.

"...I'll see you around." Kunikida muttered quietly, still flustered from the kiss just now. Dazai smiled in response, a slight blush on his cheeks as he spoke, "That better be a promise, Spiderman~"
Spiderman nodded in response to Dazai. Then without any warning he pulls himself up into the sky and leaves.

"Hey! You haven't even told me your name!" Dazai shouted after Spiderman who disappeared into the endless buildings of New York...