Work Text:
August fifteenth, around noon.
There they were, in a park.
Mafuyu kicked a pebble with his foot as he listened to Yuki play his guitar. It was a song he'd heard before, one that Yuki liked to play often, but Mafuyu liked it too, so he didn't mind.
The weather was nice, too, with it being summer and all.
Closing his eyes and listening to the music, Mafuyu propped his head up with his hands. He could stay here forever, he thought.
Yuki stopped playing. Mafuyu opened his eyes.
"It's too hot," He complained, fanning himself with his hand. "Don't tell anyone, but I hate the summer."
"I don't mind it." Mafuyu glanced over.
"Mm? Well, maybe you're immune to the heat, then." Yuki set his guitar to the side, and pointed across the street. "There's a vending machine over there, let's go get something to drink."
"I didn't bring any money," Mafuyu pointed out.
"Huh? Well, I was going to pay for you, anyways. C'mon, it'll be my treat."
Mafuyu hummed, getting up from the bench they both sat on, glancing back to where Yuki set his guitar. They'd be quick, so it was fine to leave it, right?
Waiting for Yuki to stand and beginning to trail behind him as they made their way over to the crosswalk, Mafuyu fiddled with the cuff of his sleeve.
He looked up and spotted the vending machines Yuki was talking about, as the crosswalk signal turned gave them the go and Yuki stepped out onto the crosswalk.
It was peaceful, like this. Maybe he and Yuki could—
"Yuki—! Wait!"
"Hm?"
He launched forward to reach for Yuki, to pull him back, but it was all too late.
They locked eyes a final time, oblivious on Yuki's end, as the truck came and slammed into him, not even bothering to stop, after.
…
What…?
He didn't even have time to scream. The truck already left.
Red, red flooding his vision, all he could see.
Blood. The smell of blood, and of Yuki.
Yuki.
He was alive not even a minute ago, so why did this happen?
Nothing felt real in this moment, not to Mafuyu. It was as if he was watching everything happen through a screen, like he wasn't in control of his body, he was just watching. He couldn't feel the ground beneath him, couldn't feel the tear rolling down his cheek, and couldn't hear the cicadas around him.
His hand was still reaching out, and Yuki would never receive it again.
He would've believed it all to be a joke, but he felt the heat against the back of his neck, reminding him that he wasn't immune to the heat, and that everything in front of him was real.
…
…
Mafuyu woke up in a cold sweat, breathing heavily.
It must've all been a dream, then, but it was way too vivid.
As his breathing slowed to a regular pace, he checked his phone on the nightstand.
August fourteenth, a little before midnight.
Everything was quiet, and dark, and he was in his room. Yes, it was all a dream, then. Yuki was still alive, and Mafuyu would see him today.
He set his phone back on his nightstand and curled back up underneath his covers, but he couldn't fall asleep again that night.
—
"Mm? Well, maybe you're immune to the heat, then." Yuki set his guitar to the side, and pointed across the street. "There's a vending machine over there, let's go get something to drink."
Mafuyu's had this conversation before, he thought, but he couldn't quite remember. The memory was faint, yet he couldn't help the dark feeling pooling in his stomach, his brows furrowing as he looked towards the ground.
"Um…" He began, and Yuki glanced over his way. "Can we get a drink from my house instead? My mom wanted me to be home soon."
"Really? It's only noon, though. Ah, well, that's fine too. Let me pack my guitar,"
Mafuyu got up from the bench and stood idly as he watched Yuki begin to put everything away into its case.
"Can I hold it for you?" He asked, instinctively, although he wasn't quite sure why.
"Mm… Yeah, why not. I don't really feel like carrying it right now anyways, because the heat makes me tired. Here, be careful with it," Yuki said, as he handed the case off to Mafuyu.
Mafuyu adjusted the case onto his back, before looking back up at Yuki. "I will."
"Haha, I know you will," He smiled as he began to walk. "But if something happens to it, you owe me, okay?"
"Owe you what?"
"Hmmm," Yuki pretended to think. "I know. We can have sex in your room,"
"Definitely not. My mom's home." Mafuyu shook his head as he followed behind Yuki.
"I'm joking. But nothing'll happen anyways, so it doesn't matter." Even if Mafuyu was standing behind Yuki, he could hear the warm smile in his voice. Despite it all, the dark feeling wouldn't fade. Why? Yuki was here, so he had nothing to fear, right?
They came to a stop outside a construction site, as other people were stopping in the way to look up with gaping mouths. Yuki stood a couple feet ahead of Mafuyu, putting his hands in his pockets.
"They're blocking the sidewalk," He mumbled a bit, before turning back to Mafuyu. "What do you think the matter is?"
"I don't— Yuki—!"
"Huh?"
His hand reached out, to pull Yuki away, yet he just barely missed.
The metal beam fell and pierced Yuki's body, and the people around him were screaming, but he couldn't hear a thing past the painful ringing in his ears.
Red staining the sidewalk, Yuki's shirt, and the soles of Mafuyu's shoes. Yuki's blood, everywhere, the smell penetrating his nostrils just as the beam penetrated Yuki's body.
He couldn't move, and he couldn't scream, nor could he feel the tears rolling down his face as they blurred his vision. His hand remained outstretched, and never again would Yuki reach for it.
His guitar was safe, as promised, but what was the cost?
He's felt this hollowness in his gut before, in that dream, but this wasn't a dream, as the heat reminded him.
If he looked close, he thought he saw Yuki smiling.
…
…
It's happened time and time again.
Everytime he wakes up and checks the time, and everytime Yuki's life remains just out of reach, but Mafuyu's tried everything.
The only way it ends is if Yuki survives, or at least he assumes, but how can he make that happen?
…
He's lost count of the days, but he knows it to not be a dream now. The heat reminds him every time, and maybe Yuki's noticed by now. He's had to have felt as if he's experienced this before, but there's no sign, and so Mafuyu's alone.
Even with Yuki here, Mafuyu's alone, because he can never save him.
Because Yuki doesn't know that Mafuyu's spent tens of years, maybe, trying to save him with his outstretched hand, but Yuki's never reached for it and maybe he never will again.
…
…
But maybe Yuki doesn't have to die.
—
"Mm? Well, maybe you're immune to the heat, then." Yuki set his guitar to the side, and pointed across the street. "There's a vending machine over there, let's go get something to drink."
He knew what to do this time, so Yuki would never die again.
He hummed in response as he stood, this time taking the lead when they walked.
Yuki left his guitar on the bench, but he could come back to get it later. They wouldn't be long.
He heard Yuki's footsteps trailing just behind his, and he was glad that Yuki couldn't see the grim expression making its way onto Mafuyu's face. It's a shock he hasn't noticed by now, really, because surely Mafuyu looked as if he was done with it all.
Well, it didn't matter now, and as the crosswalk signal gave them the go, he walked out onto the crosswalk.
"Mafuyu—! Stop!"
He turned around to smile gently at Yuki, because Yuki didn't know that this was for him, and maybe he'd never know. He'd live on blaming himself for Mafuyu's death, lamenting that he should've taken the lead when he walked, because he wouldn't remember that he had, several times before.
He closed his eyes as he heard the sound of the truck not bothering to slow, only so he wouldn't have to see the look on Yuki's face as he reached out to him.
…
…
…
…
…
…
August fourteenth, just before midnight, he could guess.
Yuki sat up in his bed and made no effort to move, merely staring blankly ahead at where his guitar sat against the wall.
The feeling in his chest wouldn't go away, and the ringing in his ears wouldn't die down.
"I failed again," Was all he could manage to say, in an uncharacteristically hollow voice.