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"What was it like, Loop? Your childhood," Odile asks, the cigarette between her fingers trailing smoke into the night sky. Something about the sight tickles Loop's brain, brings back a flash of children circling a grand bonfire under a sky not dissimilar to this one, but it's gone as soon as it arrives. They've grown used to it; more than their Stardust has, anyways.
"I'm the same as Star--Siffrin, I'm afraid," they reply, holding out their hand to bum off the same cigarette. As they once were, they'd never touch tobacco; now that they were a star themselves, lighting the path for their (Siffrin's, they remind themselves) party, they have larger concerns than some silly smoke. They weren't even sure if they had lungs, now.
"...Oh, Loop... I'm sorry for asking, then." They exhale, a cloud of smoke surrounding them. Idly, they wonder if they could learn how to make rings from the smoke. A trick they could have that Siffrin didn't.
"Don't be, Researcher. I've had far longer to accept that our home is gone. At first, I thought it was so incredibly unfair, that everyone else could remember the face of their parents. That they knew they had siblings, rather than guessing, wondering, hoping. And it is, but... It's even more unfair if you let that stop you from living the rest of your life, isn't it? If you let it consume you, then, well... you wind up like me. Or like Stardust."
Odile smiles a wry smile as she snatches back her cigarette. They were her winnings as a savior of Vaugarde, after all. Not that Loop had any. "Well, I happen to think you and Siffrin are doing quite well, aside from the knife fights outside of camp."
"Aww, they're just our little old spats! Don't worry about the two of us, Madame." Loop winks with their bad eye. It's one thing they appreciate about this body, the ability to wink without others second-guessing if they were just blinking or not.
"Hhh..." Odile exhaled, pressing a finger to her temple. "I suppose I can understand. I would grow tired if I had to travel with someone who looked and thought exactly like I used to, when I was younger."
Loop places their hand to their mouth, scandalized. "Are you calling me old, Madame?!"
"Ha!" She laughs, the sort of genuine laugh that lightens Loop's face and illuminates the entire clearing. It's funny, they never reacted to their Researcher in this way. These feelings are something entirely new, as if they've grown past the want for the sort of puppy-dog love Isabeau, their Fighter, once showered upon them. "No, I simply mean you have a sort of maturity I appreciate, Loop. Unlike some people around here."
"Well, that's what showing up one day without a childhood does, doesn't it?" Loop looks to the stars. Every time they do, it seems to bring something back, little flashes of connections that still linger in their brain even though the Universe forbids their access. They would wish to have one memory, just one memory, but they've had enough of Wish Craft for two whole Siffrins.
Odile joins them in looking upwards. They can tell from her detached expression that she doesn't hold the same reverence for the skies that they do; Loop can accept that, truly. Just the fact that somebody else looks, these days, is a blessing. For a while, the two of them are silent, the sounds of Isabeau roughhousing with Bonnie on the edge of the clearing filtering through the trees.
It's Odile who breaks the silence. "If there was one thing you missed... What would it be?"
Loop's gaze remains skyward; they don't want to acknowledge the question unless they have an answer. It's sadder to answer that they don't remember a single thing than to say that they'd zoned out, that they'd forgotten the question entirely thanks to the magic of Wish Craft.
Right as Odile opens her mouth to change the subject, they speak.
"I miss waking up to the sound of the ocean against the shore, every day. They'd all bleed into each other, but no two waves were the same. Sometimes one would knock our boat against the dock, and sometimes I'd hear mama or papa scream out because the waves would rise up to their feet when they weren't expecting it, even though they knew the tides better than anyone. The ocean has a way of surprising you. Of taking you to new places."
"That sounds absolutely lovely, Loop."
...Hmm? Were they saying something lovely? It feels like they had, but all they feel as they attempt to recall the memory is a dull headache. "What was, Madame?"
"Ah, it was nothing important." Odile sighs, looking back up towards the sky. Loop wonders if they could create new constellations of the same stars, if they'd be able to remember those same stars they kept forgetting if they gave them new names and faces and stories. They doubt it, but it sounds like a fun idea to try with Siffrin, someday.
Eventually, Odile turns to Loop, a smile on her face that says she knows more than she is letting on in the current moment. "Say, Loop. Once this journey with all of us ends, how would you feel about living by the seaside, together? I think I've grown weary of living alone, by now, and I've heard that the sea air is good for old bones like mine."
"That sounds wonderful, Odile," Loop replies, meeting her gaze with a genuine smile. Somehow, this moment feels like home.