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"Rufus Shinra? Seriously?" Reno looked at Tseng with disappointment as a text came through his phone and lit up the screen. The look was so condescending it almost looked like disgust.
"What? That's his name." Tseng replied as dry as ever, responding to Rufus's text with a short sentence and a period.
"I mean, yeah. But haven't you guys been fucking for like 2 years? You'd think you only just met, with your dry-ass texting and your Rufus Shinra. Do you guys even like each other?"
Rude shifted as Reno took another sip of his beer and turned to the large Turk with an incredulous look.
Tseng was starting to regret agreeing to go out for a beer with his fellow Turks, but he couldn't deny he was curious about why this seemed so insulting to Reno. Sure, the redheaded Turk tended to exaggerate with almost everything, but his years-long bond with his partner and boyfriend, Rude, was undeniable. If nothing else, Reno knew how to keep a relationship, and surprisingly, keep it well.
"What's wrong with Rufus Shinra? How else am I supposed to know it's him?"
" I just mean it's so formal! Usually after 2 years you'd be a little more, I don't know, lovey-dovey? Honestly, Tseng, if Rude is better than you at this, you're doomed."
Tseng felt the comparison was unfair. Rude may have been quiet, but everyone knew he was the most hopeless romantic there was. Who could forget his whirlwind romance with a member of Avalanche so many years ago? Unlike him, Tseng hadn't had much romantic experience, and it just didn't feel like his personality to show affection. Rufus didn't seem to mind, but Reno had told him a thousand times how couples always hid stuff from each other until the resentment grew so much they ended up killing one another or cheating. What if Reno was right...?
"Rude, what's Reno's name on your phone?" Tseng decided to bite.
The quiet Turk pushed his sunglasses up as he unlocked his phone and turned the screen toward Tseng:
❤️🐦❤️
"Heart, red bird, heart?" Tseng questioned the title skeptically.
"Yeah. Rude calls me Red when he's fucking me. When this name pops up on his screen, he can remember how it feels to be inside me. Isn't that romantic?"
Elena, who had been quiet until that moment, choked on her beer and turned to Reno.
"You're disgusting, Reno. No one needed to know that."
"As disgusting as it may be, it's something only Rude and I understand. Now THAT'S romance." He gave a wink to the now-blushing Rude as he took another satisfied sip of his beer.
Tseng's regret of the outing intensified by the second. Why he would ever have taken Reno seriously was beyond him. Still, his silent panic at the possibility of him being right continued.
"And what's Rude's name on your phone?"
Tseng saw Rude blush again while Reno grinned smugly. He wasted no time shoving his phone into Tseng's face.
🍆🥒Baby Daddy 🫄🥵💦
Tseng let out a sigh as he pushed the phone out of his face.
"Reno, you can't even have babies."
"So what? If I could, I would have like 20 kids by now. You can just tell Rude is fertile as hell."
Elena kicked Reno's leg under the table as she choked on her beer again. Rude seemed to choke too, a little more quietly.
"Look, I'm not saying you have to save Rufus as Baby Daddy on your phone, but you gotta admit your relationship is clearly lacking in romance, yo. Keep this up and it won't be long until some hussy comes and sweeps Rufus off his feet with pet names and love letters."
Rude grunted as he softly nodded his head.
"Seriously, Rude? Elena, you can't possibly agree with this too?" Tseng was finally running out of patience for Reno's theatrics.
"Well… I hate agreeing with Reno even a little bit, but, even though their nicknames for each other are disgusting, I guess it shows how close they are? I guess… If you're still so serious after two years, maybe you don't like each other that much?"
"Exactly, exactly!" Reno interrupted.
"Like, if you can't joke around with your boyfriend, who can you joke around with, ya know? You're already so serious Tseng, every day I'm scared you're gonna blow a gasket with all that pent-up frustration you have. The vein on your forehead bulges so much I'm thinking of giving it a name. I'm just sayin', you deserve someone who helps you get a load off you know, and I don't mean just busting a nut."
Earning another kick from Elena, Reno proceeded to chug his beer, clearly satisfied with his less-than-delicate advice.
"Don't listen to him, Tseng" Elena spoke up quickly. "If things work for you and Rufus like this, then there's nothing to worry about, right? Different strokes and all that."
Rude grunted in agreement once again.
"As if I would ever listen to Reno's advice," Tseng replied, not letting himself sound defensive.
As much as he wanted to play it cool, Tseng couldn't deny that he had found himself doubting his serious personality sometimes. Could someone like Rufus stay interested in someone that stoic long-term? Should Tseng change? Could he? He felt more confused and frustrated by the second.
As he pondered their discussion, his phone's screen lit up again, and Tseng suddenly felt incredible dread as he stared at the name Rufus Shinra.
Reno mocked him as he picked up the phone and opened the message:
Rufus Shinra: Home.
If Tseng was a dry texter, then Rufus was something else entirely. Still, Tseng questioned if maybe it was Tseng's own seriousness that caused Rufus to behave like this. Although Rufus remained professional most of the time, he was definitely warmer than Tseng in most situations, allowing himself to display emotion Tseng never could.
He stared at the message, and holding the phone as close to himself as he could, replied:
See you soon baby 😘
He felt pathetic as his heart raced. This was the first time he had ever sent an emoji to Rufus or called him any kind of pet name. Was he really this serious? He drank the last of his beer as he got up.
"Leaving already?" Elena said, knowing she would soon be a third wheel yet again.
"Rufus just got home from Junon. Haven't seen him in a couple days."
Reno laughed and smirked at Tseng.
"Don't have too much fun with Rufus Shinra! But hey, you probably won't anyway, huh?"
Sensing Tseng's hesitation, Rude pinched his partner and gave him a small wave.
"Don't listen to him, boss. Have a good evening with the president."
Tseng nodded and left the bar. He let out a sigh as soon as he was alone outside. His self-doubt swirled around his mind. When had he become so preoccupied with such insignificant things?
As much as he wanted to pretend he didn't know, he was painfully aware of why all these insecurities were surfacing.
He felt like he was in love with Rufus.
While their relationship had started as more of a physical thing, he had admired the man from afar for a long time. Surprisingly, once they had started meeting in secret, Tseng discovered another side of him, and he couldn't help but swoon whenever Rufus would show that he actually cared about the Turk as much more than just someone to fuck.
Although Tseng was usually confident and capable, he felt out of his depth when it came to relationships. Could he be enough for Rufus? If the most powerful man in Gaia wanted him, it had to mean something, right?
But if Reno was right (gods forbid), then he should definitely be doing more to please Rufus if he didn't want to lose him. And he really didn't want that. He could at least admit that much to himself. Reno's words echoed in his mind:
"Keep this up and it won't be long until some hussy comes and sweeps Rufus off his feet with pet names and love letters."
Determined, Tseng made up his mind to set things right that very night. He would show Rufus a new side of himself. Someone fun, spontaneous, and warm. Someone… Not like himself.
As he approached the apartment in Shinra HQ, he felt his heart beating out of his chest. He took a deep breath before pressing the keycard against the door. As he opened it, he saw Rufus rush over from the kitchen to greet him, stopping in front of Tseng and leaning over to smell him.
"Sir?" Tseng asked, confused at the odd greeting, and realized he had already failed at being warm and spontaneous. Rufus had asked him multiple times not to call him sir when they were alone, and here he was doing it again.
Rufus leaned back as he crossed his arms, his gaze fixed on the Turk.
"You don't look or smell drunk…" He lifted an eyebrow as he continued to stare intently.
"Why would I be drunk? I only had one drink."
Rufus took out his phone and showed the screen to Tseng. Their recent conversation was open.
"See you soon baby?" Rufus laughed.
"I thought you had to be off your face, or Reno stole your phone."
Tseng blushed. Was it really so strange that he had shown such a basic level of affection? Here was Reno calling Rude his baby daddy, and Rufus couldn't even believe a "baby" could come out of Tseng's mouth? Text? Whatever.
He huffed as he stepped into the apartment, hitting Rufus's shoulder with his as he moved past him.
"What? I can't call you baby?" He cringed as he said the word. It felt unnatural and ugly coming out of his mouth.
"No I mean… it's just not… you." Rufus suddenly turned serious, as if he were able to sense Tseng's insecure mood immediately.
"Well, maybe you don't know me as well as you thought." He avoided Rufus's gaze as he went to the kitchen to pour himself a drink. His intentions to be more spontaneous and fun were definitely not panning out. Reno would surely make fun of him if he were there.
Rufus threw his phone on the couch as he made his way to Tseng. He grabbed the Turk's arms as he turned him around and stared straight into his eyes.
"Hey. What's this about? You're being weird." He caressed Tseng's hair as he spoke, and the Turk could have melted into a puddle in that moment.
"It's just…" He couldn't really find the words to explain what he had been feeling. What could he even say? "I think you're going to leave me for someone more fun than me?" "Are you getting bored?" "Am I enough for you?" So many things he wanted to say but couldn't bring himself to.
Finally, he settled on blaming Reno. Little shit deserved it anyway.
"It's just Reno, getting in my head about being too serious. He saw you saved as "Rufus Shinra" on my phone, and he gave me a sermon about how our relationship is going to die from being so boring." He realized how ridiculous it sounded out loud.
Rufus chuckled as he continued caressing Tseng's hair, moving his left hand to his waist and pulling him close.
"What the hell should my name be saved as? I have you saved as "Director Tseng" on mine. I should show him next time."
Tseng smiled. When it came to texting, Rufus definitely had him beat in the seriousness department. He felt his stress and doubt melting away inside his president's embrace.
"He has Rude saved as baby daddy, Tseng finally replied, grimacing at the thought.
"I swear, Rude is a saint. Should you really be taking advice from someone who thinks getting creampied is the pinnacle of romance?"
Tseng chuckled. Hearing Rufus use that word made him blush a little and reminded him of that playful side of the man he was worried about being unable to keep up with.
"Probably not, but I can't say I don't worry about being too serious sometimes. I just feel like you deserve someone who does more for you in that way…"
Rufus stopped touching his hair and put both hands on Tseng's shoulders, his gaze serious.
"Do more for me? Tseng, you have more scars on your body from saving my life than anyone ever should. I know I can be a greedy man, but even I know there's a limit to how much I can ask of someone. How could you ever think you don't do enough?
Tseng blushed at the earnest words.
"I know I can fulfill my duties as a Turk well enough, but, outside of that, are you satisfied with my performance? Do you not get tired of my lack of… spontaneity? You deserve someone you can have fun with, and I'm painfully aware of how dull I can be."
"The notion of a man who has killed for a living calling himself dull is amusing, I have to admit. Besides, if I wanted to date a clown, I would date Reno, and I'd sooner lock myself up in Hojo's lab.
He gently lifted Tseng's chin and pressed a soft kiss against his lips. He whispered as he looked deep into the Turk's eyes.
"I love how serious you are. In all my life, I have never felt close to anyone like I do you, Tseng. I don't need excitement or thrills from you. I want you as you are, grounded and reliable. I adore you, just like this."
Tseng's worries faded away as Rufus kissed him, softly at first and then hungrily, as if wanting to devour every inch of him.
Rufus pulled away and moved one hand to Tseng's ass. "Why don't I show you how serious I am, too… baby?"
They both shuddered at the word and laughed.
"I'll never say that again if you don't," replied Tseng.
"Deal."
Later that night, after Rufus had thoroughly shown Tseng how seriously he took this thing between them, Tseng felt silly for ever considering Reno's advice. Laying on his president's naked chest, he could feel sleep overcoming him, but he was jolted back awake when he felt Rufus reach for his phone.
"What are you doing?" Tseng could see a mischievous grin on Rufus's face as he typed something on his phone and then reached for his own to do the same.
"There. I don't know if it will be enough for Reno, but who says we can't be sappy once in a while?"
Rufus turned both phones to face Tseng. To the left, the name Tseng 🖤 could be seen above his number on Rufus's phone. To the right, the name Rufus 🤍 appeared above the president's number on Tseng's phone.
Tseng blushed, feeling heat invade his face and neck.
"It's a security risk, sir." He turned his face away from Rufus, feeling like his heart would burst.
"Then you'll have to work twice as hard to protect me, director."
Rufus put their phones back on the nightstand as he kissed Tseng hungrily again.
As Tseng let himself get wrapped in heat and hunger for the second time that evening, he smiled. He would have to find a moment to gloat to Reno. That, however, could wait until tomorrow.