Chapter Text
It happened during a music show recording.
You’d been sitting in SEVENTEEN’s waiting room for almost an hour already, curled up on the couch while scrolling mindlessly through your phone. The members were everywhere — Mingyu stealing snacks, Dino bothering Wonwoo, Dokyeom singing loudly for absolutely no reason. Normal chaos.
And then the door opened.
“Seungkwan-ah!”
A female idol poked her head in first before walking inside with two other idols behind her, all laughing immediately when they saw him. One of them handed him a drink without hesitation.
“You still like this, right? We passed by your favorite café.”
Seungkwan lits up instantly.
“Yah! You remembered?”
The conversation flowed so naturally that it almost made your chest tighten.
They teased him comfortably. One smacked his arm while laughing. Another fixed the collar of his jacket without thinking twice. Seungkwan looked so relaxed with them—bright-eyed, loud, effortlessly charming in a way you suddenly felt you weren’t anymore.
You stayed quiet in the corner.
At first, nobody noticed.
But the longer you watched, the smaller you felt.
They were gorgeous. Talented. Famous. They fit his world perfectly. They could stand beside him publicly without people questioning whether they could “fit”. Meanwhile, you suddenly became hyperaware of everything about yourself. The way you looked today, how plain your outfit felt, how awkward you suddenly seemed sitting there.
And the worst part?
You hated feeling jealous because they weren’t doing anything wrong.
One of the female idols finally noticed you and smiled politely. “Oh, hi!”
You smiled back quickly, “Hi.”
But after that, you barely spoke again.
Seungkwan didn’t notice immediately. He was caught up in conversation, laughing loudly, reenacting some backstage story while everyone cracked up around him.
You watched him laugh and thought: Of course they like. How could they not?
The thought sat ugly in your stomach.
Eventually the idols left, waving goodbye casually.
The room quieted again.
Seungkwan turned back towards you immediately, still smiling from laughing so hard, but the smile slowly faded when he noticed your expression.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
That answer alone made him narrow his eyes.
“You’re doing the thing.”
“What thing?”
“The quiet thing.”
You let out a small sigh, looking away. “You looked happier with them.”
His face fell instantly. “What?”
“You just…” laughed softly, embarrassed already. “I don’t know. They’re all pretty and talented and they understand your world better than I do.”
For a second, Seungkwan just stared at you like the idea genuinely offended him.
Then, he walked over and crouched in front of where you sat.
“Are you serious?”
You shrugged weakly.
He looked almost frustrated now, not at you, but at the fact that you believed it all.
“Do you know why I’m comfortable with them?” He tapped your right knee lightly. “But you’re my person.”
Your eyes flickered towards Seungkwan.
“I laugh with a lot of people,” he continued softly, “But when something good or bad happens, you’re the one I want to look to first).
The embarrassment hit you full force now. “I know it’s stupid—”
“It’s not stupid.” Seungkwan instantly softened his voice. “I just hate that you sat here thinking you had to compete with anybody.”
Then, after a beat, he added dramatically: “Also, half of them, were like roasting me the entire time.”
You laughed despite yourself.
“There,” he pointed out immediately. “That’s the reaction I want!”
And when he reached up to hold your hand afterwards, he didn’t let go for the rest of the night.