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Kim Soleum inhales deeply, keeping his eyes closed.
He obviously understands the basics. Just as people experience puberty differently, secondary gender manifestation always occurs at varying times for children and teens.
All this time, Soleum was never concerned, so sure he was going to present as a beta. There were no signs to indicate anything else.
But there it is — in bold no less — on this damn piece of paper:
Recessive omega.
If he skipped out on his yearly physical today, he wouldn't even have known. For one, nothing changed in his current daily life. He didn't feel sick or feeble. There was no heat, no slick. His nose has always been weak, so he never could smell subtle things, let alone pheromones.
For most of his life, Soleum has only really been around betas. His parents are betas, their friends are betas, and even the family friends' children are betas.
So why did he have to be the outlier? Why weren’t there any tell-tale signs, even as a recessive, so he could mentally prepare?
Soleum crumples the results paper into his school bag and pushes the door open with his shoulder. The hallways are empty, thankfully, and he makes his way toward his classroom.
Today was supposed to be just like any other day. What is he supposed to do with…all this?
Soleum plops into his seat and rests his head in his arms. How is he supposed to face them now?
The hustle and bustle of his classmates heading out to lunch knocks him out of his reverie. Soleum looks down at his notebook and finds scribbles of squiggly lines and gibberish staring back at him. He presses a hand against his forehead, covering his eyes. A whole four hours flew by and he still doesn’t know what to do. Maybe he really should hide away from the world.
He gives himself two seconds before he sighs and gets a move on. The pit in his stomach seems to be hardening as he goes through the motions of packing his belongings and prepping for lunch.
He’s not even concerned about telling his parents, really. They would probably understand. Or, at the very least, stay calm. It’s the two upperclassmen he’s befriended this year that make him worry.
It’s not like they were ever weird when it came to omegas or anything, but…they’re both alphas. There was a silent comfort in knowing that things could never get awkward between the three of them. That their secondary genders weren’t going to force their hands one way or the other.
Something like this would change everything, wouldn’t it? How could it not when they’re alphas and he’s…? Does he smell a certain way now? Can other people… sniff the omega in him? He hopes not. What if they didn’t want to hang around him anymore?
There’s a muffled noise outside one of the doors to his classroom long after everyone else should be gone. He doesn’t know who it is and doesn't plan on sticking around to find out. Soleum does the cowardly thing by ducking and running away through the second door.
It was the first time that he was grateful for being in a different year than Ryu Jaekwan-sunbae and Choi-sunbae. Every time they’d meet before, Soleum would lament the fact that he was younger, that they always had to meet at the stairs or the entrance of the building since their classes were on different floors. This inconvenience worked in his favor so far today, but there were only so many breaks in the school day left.
Soleum was counting the hours down until he could go home, and any time he thought he saw the two tall boys in their blue blazers, he would swiftly turn the other way and speedwalk away. Their figures always stood out among the sea of students, so Soleum would (hopefully Very Stealthily) duck into the crowd and hope for the best each time.
Soleum jumps at the sight of both Jaekwan and Choi sitting on their clubroom couch, heads leaning toward one another. It was the most obvious spot. Of course it would be. He just foolishly hoped that they would be away at this hour of the day. There’s an intense aura emanating from them, like they’re potentially plotting something against someone who wronged them. Suddenly, their very serious gazes simultaneously turn to him.
It’s been a year with them and they’ve been so insanely perceptive and in sync it scares him. Still, Soleum still thinks that if he tried just a bit harder, he could’ve gotten away. He just refuses to admit that there was a part of him that wanted to be caught by them.
Jaekwan speaks up first, eyes piercing into Soleum’s. “What’s going on, Soleum-ah?”
His voice is painfully soft, concerned. Soleum’s heart thuds against his chest. Now that he’s here in front of them, he doesn’t think he can do this. Maybe he shouldn’t have got caught.
“Whatever it is, you’re thinking way too hard on it.” Choi smiles softly. His eyes are warm, welcoming and it calms Soleum in a way he never consciously thought about before until now.
He supposes that these two have always affected him — how could they not — but it still surprises him.
The lingering silence starts to feel uncomfortable, yet the duo still haven’t said anything. Simply waiting for him to continue, as if they’re waiting for him to reveal it to them.
It isn’t until a few more beats later when Soleum realizes.
There’s a ringing echoing between his ears now, and a headache begins to form. His own voice sounds a bit distant to him.
“…You knew?”
Choi scrunches up his nose guiltily. “Soleummie…”
Soleum wants to hide, run away. He would very much like to disappear now, thank you very much.
Why did he come here again?
Choi clasps at Soleum’s wrist with his index finger and thumb, as if he was afraid to touch his hoobae.
Jaekwan speaks up first before Soleum can protest. “You were acting so suspiciously. We were worried.”
Choi’s thumb brushes against Soleum’s palm now, eyes cast down. “Jaekwannie said your scent was different at lunch when we walked by. And you were avoiding us the whole day. We knew you had your physical today.”
Soleum feels himself about to spiral.
Choi gently continues. “After that, it was easy to figure it out.”
In the end, it really was that obvious. As simple as Jaekwan-sunbae smelling something different even though they didn’t even see each other until now. He shouldn’t be shocked, when they're both young dominant alphas.
Another hand palms over his elbow before squeezing in. He looks up to see Jaekwan peering down at him. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Soleum.”
When Soleum doesn’t immediately say anything or react, Jaekwan urges, “You get that, right?”
His heart is still beating fast. After a slight nod, the trio sits in silence. Jaekwan and Choi seem to be waiting for him to speak up first, to set the pace now that this whole Omega thing is out there now.
Maybe it’s because he knows what kind of alphas they are. What kind of boys they are. They’re the ones who take care of the stray animals at the side of the school. They’re the ones who pause to help the grandmas and grandpas with heavy boxes and crossing the street. They’re the ones who gave him space to be his true self. Even with this, knowing they would be there has been a constant.
Soleum finds the words spilling out of his mouth before he can stop. “Can…”
Soleum pinches his dress shirt, rubbing at a thread that’s slightly unraveling.
Jaekwan and Choi are sitting still, entirely focused on him as he gathers his thoughts.
“Can you show me…? What to do?” Soleum looks between the two of them now, and he can sense their energy, some wires sparking, their innate desire to help.
He hasn’t even finished asking yet when Choi and Jaekwan jump up, and they immediately bring two desks together to his in the middle. Choi sits on his left and Jaekwan on his right.
Choi clasps his shoulder. “Soleummie, this whole thing is hard to get used to at first, but you’ve got your hyungs now.”
Soleum does actually feel a weight is off his body.
“I’m sure the main thing you’re worried about is the whole scent thing, right?”
Soleum nods. That’s honestly the scariest part of it all for him right now. He can’t even really wrap his head around all the other…technical stuff. But baby steps, right?
Choi gently slides a hand down Soleum’s arm before encircling his fingers around Soleum’s wrist. His thumb slowly brushes over Soleum’s scent gland and Soleum shivers.
Okay, this is bigger than a baby step.
Soleum gulps at the close proximity, intimidated that he’s feeling Choi's warmth. No one has ever brazenly touched him like this before, no one else but family has actually been intimate. Of course there have been times when he’s brushed shoulders with his sunbaes, but…scent glands are obviously new to him. He never even looked at anyone’s until, well, now.
Soleum can feel himself stiffen when Choi raises his hand to his lips. He hopes they can’t see him sweating or hear his heart beating.
Choi throws him off again. “Your veins.”
Choi smirks up at him, letting out a soft exhale. The breath tickles Soleum’s hand. “They’re very pretty.”
Soleum awkwardly blinks, forgetting what made him nervous in the first place because what does that even mean?
“Sunbae-nim.” Jaekwan admonishes behind him.
“I can’t help but speak the truth. Haven’t you seen the way his wrist bends at the perfect angle, Jaekwannie?”
Jaekwan stares at him evenly, and Choi smirks. “Thought so.”
Soleum snorts. And just like that, the uneasiness he felt all day, the weight of everything is suddenly gone. He's been fretting over how he would talk to them and now it's more than fine.
Veins, of all things.
He thought everything would change for the worse when it turned out that he was an omega. In the safety of their clubroom, with both Choi and Jaekwan here, Soleum feels at home. His vulnerability doesn’t feel like a burden anymore.
He certainly wishes his senses were better though. Surely they’re uncomfortable around someone who not only has a weak nose but doesn’t know if he’s controlling his own pheromones as well.
Choi speaks up again. “You can stop this at any time, okay? We go at your pace.”
“Okay.” Soleum quietly says, grateful even though they’re treating him like a deer that’s ready to bolt.
“Let’s start with something easy.” Choi smiles reassuringly and Soleum reaches out to hold Choi’s hand again to reaffirm.
“I want you to scent me.”
“That’s easy?” Soleum blurts out.
He wonders if this is how things went for the two of them as well, when they were going through their own manifestations.
“You’ll get the hang of it in no time. It’s natural.” Choi pats his head, standing stock still in front of Soleum with a second hand out, inviting him closer. It reminds Soleum of the times the stray cats would sniff at their hands before accepting their treats.
Soleum reaches forward, grabbing Choi’s hand. He’s trying to see if he can smell anything different from Choi before Choi suddenly pulls him toward his chest, and Soleum's cheek is pressed against Choi’s scent gland at his neck.
His pace his ass.
“C-choi sunbae!” Soleum loudly exclaims, instinctively holding his breath because isn’t this insanely strong up close for friends? Can’t he, like, faint or something? Or worse, be triggered into heat???
He can feel the rumbles of Choi’s laugh. “You gotta get up close and personal to really train your out-of-practice nose, Soleummie.”
Soleum looks up at Choi and his eyes dart to the left where Jaekwan now stands at the back of Choi, who nods at Soleum in acknowledgement of Choi’s words. “It’s safe.”
Soleum turns to Choi again, bracing himself as he clears his throat. It’s truly awkward to look at his neck glands up close, but they’re right. He does need the practice if this is going to be an everyday thing in his life now.
“What…what am I supposed to smell?” Soleum exhales and whispers softly, embarrassed. Pheromones were never a factor in his life until now. When he overheard classmates talk about them before, it always seemed hard for people to describe the effects, the actual smells themselves. He’s seen couples break up over this, friendships torn apart all because of secondary traits and these goddamn pheromones. When it comes to Choi and Jaekwan, he doesn’t want to mess anything up. Hurt them in any way. Doesn’t want their bond to break.
“Well, Jaekwannie here tells me that I smell really good so that’s all I focus on.” Choi proudly says, chest puffed like a peacock.
Jaekwan finally steps closer to the two of them. He places a hand on Soleum’s shoulder and squeezes, and Soleum tries very hard not to think about how big his hand is and how comforting his touch is. The upperclassman leans forward until he’s at eye level with Soleum, making sure that Soleum is solely focused on him. This close, he can see Jaekwan's cheeks are slightly flushed from Choi's earlier comment. It is a bit out of character to hear Jaekwan be so openly affectionate with compliments like that. At the moment, though, Soleum doesn’t know how Jaekwan’s able to ignore Choi’s current incessant poking at his cheek.
Jaekwan opens his mouth, waits a second, and then continues. “It’s okay if you can’t really put your thoughts and observations into words right now. Or what we think. What matters the most is how you feel about this.”
Solum silently nods, eyes wandering to the exposed neck glands peeking from Jaekwan’s undershirt. He briefly wonders how many times the two of them have scented each other, if they’ve ever… Soleum blushes, desperately hoping that the alphas weren’t able to tell what he was thinking about.
He turns back to Choi and rests his head against his collarbone, facing away from both of them. He's done similar things plenty of times before, being hugged by both Jaekwan and Choi. Resting his head on their shoulders when he needed a nap. But there were no expectations then. No…undertones.
He feels so incompetent, unprepared for everything that’s to come. Even if he is recessive,all the new sensations that would eventually come with being a non-beta was terrifying. Everyone else he knew dealt with this years ago. These two have been together for years. Do these two scent each other now? He’s never noticed. Do they have…omega partners to go to during…? Gods, how the hell has he managed to ignore everything related to alphas and omegas up until now?
Soleum can feel his shoulders shaking, his limbs feeling heavy. He presses his face further into Choi’s chest, relishing the warmth that the upperclassman emitted.
“Hey, hey.” Choi wraps his arm around Soleum’s waist to steady them. Soleum can feel Choi’s breath tickling against the back of his neck. “Don’t stress yourself out like this. We’re alphas. Soothing you is, like, almost literally our purpose.”
Choi gently strokes his back, trying to reassure him. “…Please, Soleummie? Is it me? You can even start with Jaekwannie first.”
Soleum chuckles, amused at Choi’s desperation and self-depreciation, and turns his head to look at the two of again. Small smiles simultaneously form on both Choi and Jaekwan’s lips and there’s an extra shine in both of their eyes.
They’re right. What is there to fear now? Even when he thought he was a beta the two of them had always been there for him. Soleum truly is grateful they’re so patient with him, grateful that they’re so willing to help him navigate through this.
He’s always been curious about their pheromones anyway and they’re offering them to him on a silver platter. Why hold back now?
He clears his throat, gently pushing away from Choi’s embrace.
“Okay, let’s do this.”
Soleum shyly reaches out to Jaekwan first, who stands steadily, waiting to see what he’ll do. It feels weird intentionally smelling someone like he’s testing different bottles of cologne or selecting body wash at the store.
Jaekwan is patient and steady, as always. Soleum grabs at his waist, pulling in Jaekwan closer so he could be close enough to his neck gland. He still can’t smell anything even when he’s up on his tippy toes. Surely he doesn’t have to press his nose against the guy to be able to smell it, right?
He tentatively inhales a couple more times, and softly gasps when it finally becomes apparent. “I…I can smell you.”
Jaekwan’s eyes crinkle at the corners in amusement. “It’s to your liking, I hope.”
Soleum huffs a little. “It is. Makes me want to go camping.” Woodsy, a bit of smoke. Jaekwan smells like a warm cabin in the winter when there’s heavy snow and a brightly lit hearth.
“How about me, Soleum-ah?” Choi grins, pushing forward and nuzzling his head into the side of Soleum’s shoulder like he wasn’t a whole head taller than his underclassman. “My turn, my turn.”
Soleum laughs as they all reposition. He didn’t realize at some point that Jaekwan had wrapped an arm around him, and the blue-eyed upperclassman doesn’t let go when Choi pushes into Soleum.
Soleum blushes when Jaekwan gently nestles his cheek against the back of Soleum’s nape, watching the scene before him unfold.
Their scent glands are…touching. Is this normal? It feels right though. And no one’s saying anything or doing anything. The warmth and the cozy smells filling up the room has Soleum dizzy.
Choi slightly pushes himself back now, leaning a little while exposing his neck. His eyes, half-closed, almost look seductive, and Soleum wonders if he and Jaekwan do this often.
They’re practically all folded into each other as Jaekwan’s got him in a bear hug at his back and Choi is hugging both of their waists in his embrace. Soleum’s rather glad that they pushed the three desks together because he’s sure they would’ve collapsed by now. He wishes they were on the couch because they must feel uncomfortable with this. (Little does he know what’s running in both alphas’ minds at this moment.)
Soleum slightly edges forward, inhaling deeply around Choi’s exposed neck glands. He’s surprised that the scent quickly permeates the air.
Choi is fresh, reminiscent of spring fields. Sunny. Soleum imagines laying on a field of grass where there are birds chirping. It’s warm enough that it’s close to summer, but not sweltering.
He slightly turns his head to see Choi already looking back at him. Choi’s eyes bounce between Soleum’s, waiting with abated breath.
Soleum bashfully smiles at how excited Choi seems about this. “It’s good. Really refreshing, and nostalgic.”
Choi’s grin widens, reaching behind Soleum to give Jaekwan a tap on the shoulder. “You hear that?”
Jaekwan’s lip curves up as he leans in to whisper into Soleum's ear. “He’s going to be riding that high for the rest of the year now.”
Choi hits Jaekwan again, slightly jostling Soleum as he does it. "As if you aren't going to too."
Jaekwan leans back, gently pulling Soleum with him so he isn’t smothered between the two alphas. "No comment."
Soleum laughs and feels Choi nuzzle against his shoulder while Jaekwan brushes a hand against his waist. "I'm sure you guys have been told that you smell great plenty of times by now."
Choi perks up, once more, letting out a small cheer. "Oi, Jaekwannie, we got upgraded to great!"
Jaekwan’s cheeks have gone from pink to bright red. It’s a first for Soleum, seeing him this affected, and he starts to feel his face warm up too at their reactions. Maybe he was wrong. Maybe it isn't the norm for to tell alphas how pleasing they smell. He’s read many books before, seen many movies, and there have been plenty of confession scenes with the stuff he's read before. Was this a little too much, or too fast? Maybe he's reading into things.
A hand lands over his and when Soleum looks up again, he sees Jaekwan softly smiling at him, eyes solely focused on him as Choi is yapping about pheromones and the responsibilities of being an alpha and how he can’t wait to be teaching him all the things about being an omega. Soleum curves his lips up as well.
Jaekwan has always been able to soothe him with just a small smile, a small reassurance. Choi does everything in his power to make sure everyone around him is not just comfortable, but fully acknowledged and solid and here in the moment. Soleum hopes, with all of his heart, that his presence helps them too. That the there of them could keep being them forever.
“Wait.” Soleum pauses in slipping his right shoe on.
“Hm?” Choi lazily asks, chest glued against Soleum’s back. He’s been this way since they left the clubroom, only separating to put on his white sneakers.
At the school’s front entrance gate, there’s a clear view of the sun setting, and the sky above is a warm shade of orange.
In all this, Soleum realizes he never asked. “So, what do I smell like?”
Soleum looks up to see Choi blinking slowly, clearly avoiding his eye contact as Jaekwan silently finishes securing his own shoes on.
The three of them start walking down the hill side by side, with Choi in the middle.
These two were just talking about him avoiding hard things, and working as a team, so there’s no way Soleum’s going to let them slip from this. It’s their turn to be in the hot seats.
Soleum stands up straighter, speeding up to start walking backwards and get a good look at his two alphas. “You said earlier that Jaekwan-sunbae could smell the difference in me. My nose sucks. So… yeah, what do I smell like?”
Choi’s eyes quickly glance at Jaekwan. Jaekwan, in turn, tucks his head down as he briskly walks ahead of them.
Soleum can see the tips of his ears are red again. Suspicious.
A slight breeze picks up, and the trees around them bristle some, but he can still hear Jaekwan’s words clearly.
“Like ours. Always have.”
Soleum’s heart stutters and he quickly looks back to a grinning Choi now tugging at Soleum to catch up to Jaekwan. His sunbae salaciously winks at him and Soleum laughs in disbelief. His cheeks hurt from smiling, and this is how he knows it’s real, like the most right thing in his life. It never mattered if he was an omega or a beta or an alpha.
He breathes in again, and the mixture of the soothing scents of a warm winter cabin and fresh fields envelop him. He feels Choi’s warm palm, and Jaekwan’s when he finally slows down to grasp his left hand. Soleum firmly squeezes both of their hands with each of his hands, refusing to let go.
Yeah, everything’s gonna be alright.