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Wooje is nine years old when he first sees Hyunjoon. That is—sees him fight someone.
It happens behind the elementary school building during lunch break, where the pavement is cracked near the bike racks and weeds grow through the gaps. The older kids always hang around there because teachers rarely check that side of the grounds unless somebody cries loud enough.
Wooje isn’t supposed to be there. Minseok told him that at least three times already.
“Don’t go near them,” Minseok says, gripping Wooje’s sleeve while trying to drag him toward the swings instead. “Seriously. Those are sixth graders.”
Wooje blinks at him. “So?”
“So they’re scary.”
“You’re in sixth grade too.”
“That’s why I’m telling you, they’re scary.”
Wooje looks over Minseok’s shoulder again.
There are three boys near the wall. Two of them are shoving each other hard enough for shoes to scrape against concrete. The third stands nearby looking furious and helpless all at once, yelling something Wooje can’t hear from here.
The boy doing most of the fighting is tall for his age. Lanky, all long limbs and sharp movements, like he grew too fast for his own body and still hasn’t caught up yet. His dark hair hangs over his forehead messily, sticking slightly to his skin with sweat. Even from a distance, Wooje can see the split in his lip.
He also sees the way the boy keeps pushing the other kid away from the one standing behind him.
“Do you know them?” Wooje asks. Minseok frowns at him, before looking at the guys.
“Yeah,” he points at them one by one—discreetly. He might actually be scared. “The ones fighting are Hyunjoon, that one’s Junhwan. And that’s— that’s Minhyung.”
Hyunjoon shoves the other boy one final time before a teacher’s voice suddenly echoes from somewhere across the courtyard.
“HEY!”
Everyone scatters immediately after that.
The other kids run first. The boy behind Hyunjoon—Minhyung—grabs his arm, trying to pull him too, but Hyunjoon jerks away with an irritated shake of his head. “I’m fine, Minhyung. Just go.”
The teacher is still far away, thankfully distracted by another group of screaming children. Hyunjoon wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and exhales sharply.
And that’s when Wooje slips away from Minseok entirely.
“Hey—Choi Wooje!”
Too late.
Wooje jogs straight toward Hyunjoon without a single thought in his head besides the fact that the older boy is bleeding. Up close, Hyunjoon looks even rougher around the edges. There’s dirt smeared against his cheek and redness around his knuckles. His school tie hangs loose and crooked beneath his collar. His eyes narrow immediately when he notices Wooje approaching.
“What do you want?”
He sounds suspicious, for some reason. Is he on defense-mode 24/7?
Wooje stops directly in front of him and just stares at his hand.
“It’s bleeding.”
Hyunjoon blinks once, visibly confused by the response.
“No shit.”
“You should wash it first.”
“...What do you want?” Hyunjoon repeats.
Minhyung, still lingering nearby despite being told to leave, looks equally confused. Minseok finally catches up too, slightly out of breath and deeply betrayed.
“I told you not to come here,” Minseok hisses.
Wooje ignores him completely. “There’s a sink in the nurse’s office,” he tells Hyunjoon seriously. “Or, maybe not the nurse’s office because then you’ll get caught for fighting.”
Hyunjoon lets out a short scoff despite himself. “You think?”
Wooje nods once, solemn like this is a medical consultation. “You should still clean it.”
For a second, Hyunjoon just stares right at him. Then, “Why do you care?” He asks finally.
Minseok immediately pouts, offended. “See? I told you!”
Wooje only frowns. “My parents are doctors,” he lies confidently. “So I know what I’m saying.”
Minseok’s jaw drops open. Hyunjoon looks skeptical, “Doctors?”
“Mhm.”
“What kind?”
Wooje hesitates for exactly one second too long. “...Doctor kind?”
He hears Minhyung snort. Hyunjoon stares another moment before unexpectedly laughing under his breath. It changes his whole face instantly. The hostility in his expression softens, making him look younger than he did five seconds ago.
Wooje thinks, abruptly and very seriously: Hyunjoon’s smile is really pretty.
The thought catches him so off guard that he almost forgets what they’re talking about.
Then Hyunjoon jerks his injured hand forward lazily. “Fine then, doctor kid. Fix it.”
Wooje beams immediately. Behind him, Minseok groans loud enough for everyone to hear.
They end up sitting on the steps near the back entrance of the gymnasium because it’s hidden from most teachers during lunch. Wooje digs through his tiny backpack with intense concentration until he finds wet wipes and two bandaids he’d stolen from home weeks ago because he liked them. They have tiny Psyducks printed on them.
Wooje carefully wipes blood from Hyunjoon’s knuckles while Hyunjoon pretends not to flinch. It’s really quiet, usually it doesn’t bother Wooje but he has this need bubbling in his stomach that he has to say something.
He finds himself smiling before he speaks: “I lied earlier.”
Hyunjoon squints. “About what?”
“My parents aren’t doctors.”
Silence.
Then Minhyung starts laughing first.
Hyunjoon stares at Wooje for two whole seconds before laughing too—loud and bright and completely unguarded this time. He bends forward slightly with it, hand covering his mouth while Wooje giggles beside him like they’ve known each other forever instead of ten minutes. When he glances over towards Minseok, his best friend just looks tired of the whole ordeal.
Wooje remembers Hyunjoon calling him a bad liar that day. The next thing they know—their little group of four became inseparable. Wooje likes to take the credit for that.
🎶
Wooje realizes he likes Hyunjoon sometime during middle school.
He wonders if he should blame Minseok and Minhyung and their disgustingly adorable love life for it—but that would be wrong. After all, they weren’t even present when it all came crashing down at once in the middle of the night and suddenly nothing felt ordinary anymore.
It’s kind of unfair, honestly. Because before that, Hyunjoon had just been… Hyunjoon.
His annoying best friend. The person Wooje spent the most time with besides Minseok. The guy who stole fries off his tray at lunch and flicked his forehead and dragged him around by the backpack straps whenever Wooje walked too slowly.
Then Hyunjoon starts high school, and suddenly everything changes in ways Wooje absolutely hates.
It starts with the uniform, maybe. High school uniforms look sharper somehow, to middle schooler Wooje anyway: darker blazers, cleaner lines. Seniors rolling up their sleeves and loosening ties like they’re in some coming-of-age movie.
Wooje notices it the first day he sees Hyunjoon after school wearing the new uniform properly instead of just pieces of it during fittings. Hyunjoon’s gotten taller again over the break, annoyingly so. His limbs are still long and lean but broader now too, shoulders filling out slightly beneath the blazer. His hair’s longer than school rules technically allow, dark strands falling over his glasses.
Whilst nine-year old Wooje would not think too much of it, twelve-year old Wooje feels absolutely gutted to think about how handsome Hyunjoon really looks.
He tries his best to ignore the weird, sinking feeling in his chest, but it only gets worse after that.
Hyunjoon gets busier after entering high school. They have different schedules now, and the way all of them describe it, it feels like they have an exam every week. Hyunjoon becomes trapped in unwanted study sessions by Sanghyeok, and Wooje would be lying if he said it wasn’t at least slightly entertaining.
However, Wooje sees him less during weekdays now unless he waits after school. So naturally, Wooje starts waiting after school almost every day.
Sometimes Hyunjoon comes out exhausted and immediately leans half his body weight onto Wooje while complaining about teachers. Sometimes he buys Wooje snacks without asking what he wants because he already knows what Wooje likes to get. Sometimes they walk home together while listening to IU or 5 Seconds of Summer or whatever music they’re into.
And slowly, horrifyingly, Wooje starts noticing things he absolutely should not notice about his best friend.
Like Hyunjoon’s hands.
It’s ridiculous to even think about—but Hyunjoon has nice hands.
His fingers are long. His veins are more visible now than before. His knuckles are really pretty. Hyunjoon has the kind of hands that tap impatiently against desks and ruffle Wooje’s hair roughly and rest against the back of Wooje’s neck to steer him through crowds.
Wooje wonders if he should just completely disappear from their lives when he starts noticing and thinking about Hyunjoon’s mouth—his lips—and how ridiculously pretty his mouth looks when he smiles or grins, when he grins at Wooje and it is frankly embarrassing.
He doesn’t even know why he notices it so much. Okay, Wooje’s not completely averse to the ideas and scenes of kissing and the touching of lips and whatever people do when they’re in love—hell, he even has his two best friends as an example, although they have shame and don’t engage in PDA as much.
They are the primary contributors to Wooje’s problem though. Because one afternoon when Minhyung and Minseok show up late to meet them looking suspiciously flustered, Hyunjoon immediately narrows his eyes once he sees them.
“Were you two making out again?”
They both have the grace to look a little embarrassed about it, before Minseok elbows Hyunjoon and tells him to mind his damn business.
Wooje’s thoughts keep scrambling after that.
That night, lying in bed staring at the ceiling, his brain traitorously supplies the image of Hyunjoon kissing someone.
The thought twists unpleasantly in his stomach.
Then immediately after comes another thought: What would it feel like to kiss Hyunjoon?
Wooje’s eyes widen in the dark while his own brain betrays him repeatedly.
He’s never kissed anyone before. He’s thought about it, sure, but those vague and abstract thoughts suddenly aren’t so distant anymore—now he can imagine it too clearly.
Hyunjoon leaning close, his hand grabbing Wooje’s chin carelessly, the warmth of his skin, the press of lips— fuck.
This is like, really, really bad.
That isn’t even the worst part—does wanting to kiss someone also make you feel weirdly possessive of them?
There’s this little feeling that appears whenever Wooje sees Hyunjoon laughing with someone else he doesn’t know for too long. The strange satisfaction Wooje feels when he sees Hyunjoon looking for him after school. There’s this selfish thought that maybe—maybe he doesn’t want to share Hyunjoon at all. Because Hyunjoon is his best friend, because this is Hyunjoon and Wooje doesn’t know what to do with feelings that suddenly feel far too big for his chest.
🎶
The lake on the way home looks really pretty after school. It’s hidden behind an old walking trail lined with crooked trees. But the lake itself is pretty. Maybe it is the way the setting sun melted into the water, turning everything gold and amber. Or maybe it is because Wooje barely ever comes here alone anymore. Somehow, Hyunjoon is always sitting beside him on the dock, and sometimes on the stairs led down from the roadside to the dock by the lake. Wooje prefers sitting on the stairs anyway.
Maybe that’s why they’re sitting here today too.
Wooje pulls at a loose thread on his sleeve absentmindedly. “Do you think you’ll find another best friend in high school?”
Hyunjoon turns towards him slightly. “What?”
Wooje shrugs, trying to sound casual, “I don’t know. You’re there all day now. New classmates and stuff.”
Hyunjoon looks at him strangely for a second before leaning back against the stair behind him, a breathy laugh escaping.
“No shot,” he says. “I’ve been there a while already. What do you think, Wooje?”
Wooje glances sideways at him, and smiles a little despite himself.
“You miss me there, don’t you?”
Hyunjoon’s expression immediately goes flat. “Nope. Minseok probably does.”
Wooje gasps in offense. “You suck.”
He stands dramatically at once, fully prepared to leave out of principle alone, or at least pretend to. But before he can even get farther than one step, Hyunjoon catches his wrist and yanks him back down beside him again. “Okay, sorry, sorry.”
Wooje tries to keep glaring at him. Hyunjoon even grabs one ear dramatically between his fingers in mock apology, “My bad.”
Wooje clicks his tongue and wonders why he started liking this guy. “You’re annoying.”
“Of course I miss you, Woojeng.”
Yeah, Wooje hates that nickname. Well… not actually. He just hates how smoothly it rolls off Hyunjoon’s tongue and he knows Hyunjoon is only trying to be soft on purpose and that it’s working because Wooje can practically feel the heat climbing into his face.
“Whatever.” Would it be weird if Wooje left right now? Hyunjoon is annoying anyway, and also Wooje’s hopeless crush on him isn’t helping.
But then Hyunjoon shoves a side of his wired headphones into Wooje’s ear and Wooje thinks, yeah, okay, maybe not today.
There’s a song playing already: Long Way Home by 5 Seconds of Summer. Wooje really likes that song; it has a nice pop-punk sound and Wooje is really digging the heavy instrumentation of the electric guitar. The song itself kind of reminds him of himself and Hyunjoon. Teenagers singing about cherishing time with their loved one and living in the moment—it's kind of romantic. Wooje would take the long way home to spend more time with Hyunjoon any day. Which is funny, because they practically see each other every single day and Wooje is always crashing at either his and Minhyung’s home or Minseok’s and yet—he never gets tired. Never gets tired of the summer evenings that feel endless, never gets tired of the nights spent sneaking out, or the days spent ignoring homework or Sanghyeok’s or their parent’s scoldings and Wooje just wants to stay this way forever.
🎶
Wooje is tired of high school.
Sure, he’s still a freshman but that doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to feel exhausted already. He gets his best friends’ complaints now.
Wooje stands near the school gate with his backpack slung over one shoulder, absentmindedly kicking at a loose pebble. School ended just about five minutes ago—Wooje met Minseok and Minhyung almost right after school broke. They talked for a few seconds and then they were gone.
A group of girls pass by laughing loudly. Someone from the basketball club—presumably since he has a jersey on—nearly crashes into him while running down the steps. Wooje barely moves aside in time before glaring at the guy’s back.
Then, finally, “Sup.”
Wooje looks up to see Hyunjoon walking down the front steps with one hand shoved into his pocket and his bag hanging carelessly off his shoulder. His tie is loose already, shirt sleeves rolled up messily to his elbows. He looks exhausted in the way all juniors probably do.
He skips down the last few stairs as he approaches. “Where are those two?”
Wooje shrugs lightly, “Said they had somewhere to go.”
“Together?”
Wooje tilts his head and eyes Hyunjoon questionably. “What do you think, Hyunjoon?”
Hyunjoon just laughs under his breath. “Gross.”
Wooje chuckles in response, “They said they'd come back though.” They most definitely lied. Wooje is 95% sure he’ll receive a text in a few minutes from either Minseok or Minhyung telling them to head home because they “got caught up with something.”
Hyunjoon clicks his tongue before suddenly grinning at Wooje. “Wanna ditch them?”
Wooje blinks once before smiling automatically. “Pretty sure they’re the ones who ditched us already.”
“Boo,” Hyunjoon says dramatically. “Doesn’t matter.”
And well, that’s enough to decide the rest of the afternoon.
Neither of them suggests where to go after that. They just start walking naturally, side by side beneath the slowly darkening sky. Wooje falls into step beside Hyunjoon like second nature at this point. Their shoulders bump once every few steps because Hyunjoon walks annoyingly close to people.
The streets around the school are crowded for a while, because students are spilling out into convenience stores. Hyunjoon buys a soda on the way and gets coffee for Wooje because he already knows that Wooje hates fizzy drinks.
“You’re like fourteen and you already have an obsession with coffee,” Hyunjoon shakes his head while sipping on his Dr. Pepper. “Whatever happened to kids being kids?”
Wooje shoots him a judgemental look. “One: you’re the one who got me the coffee. And two: you would probably have much better focus if you started drinking coffee instead of that atrocious drink, old man.”
Hyunjoon scoffs, “Watch your mouth. Dr. Pepper is not atrocious.”
“Sure.”
They make their way to the lake on the way home. Neither of them goes all the way down to the riverside anymore. At some point, they upgraded to the topmost stairs, right by that big tree. It’s hard to explain when that spot became theirs, but it just did. Over the years, they just kept ending up here, sometimes with the others, but more often just the two of them.
The tree leans slightly over the staircase, wide branches stretching overhead like a roof. From here, the water reflects the sky beautifully during sunset, all gold and orange and soft blue melting together. And if you come early enough, like Wooje did alone during winter break—you can see the sunrise too.
But sunsets belong to Hyunjoon somehow.
Hyunjoon immediately drops onto the stairs with a tired sigh, extending his legs out comfortably.
Wooje doesn’t sit, not yet anyway. Instead, he lingers nearby for no reason at all. The breeze brushes lightly against his skin as he shifts his weight from one foot to another. He’s suddenly feeling a little restless. Is it the coffee?
Hyunjoon watches him for a moment with visible confusion. “What are you doing?”
“Nothing.”
“You look like you need to pee.”
Wooje makes a repulsed face, “You’re disgusting.”
Hyunjoon snorts and looks down at his phone afterward, clearly deciding Wooje’s weirdness isn’t worth investigating. Wooje continues standing, his eyes shift from the setting sun to Hyunjoon, then back to the sun again. Hyunjoon looks really soft in this lighting.
Wooje drops his bag beside Hyunjoon and takes a scroll around. When he looks at Hyunjoon, he catches the older staring before averting his eyes. Wooje’s heart skips a beat. He wanders a little before coming back to Hyunjoon.
Hyunjoon glances sideways. “You still not sitting?”
“I might leave.”
“To where?”
“To find Minhyung and Minseok.”
Hyunjoon frowns, “Why?”
Wooje shrugs dramatically. “Maybe they miss me.”
Hyunjoon snickers, “They absolutely do not.”
“And how’d you know?”
“If we’re being real, they’re probably making out right now,” Hyunjoon physically grimaces after saying that. “Screw that, they’re definitely making out right now.” He smiles sweetly at Wooje before saying, “You’re probably the last person either of them are thinking about, Wooje-ah.”
Wooje makes a throwing-up face and thinks Hyunjoon is probably right. But Wooje wouldn’t be Wooje without going against Hyunjoon in the most trivial matters. He straightens and goes, “Whatever, I’m leaving for real.”
He retrieves his bag from the ground and turns fully, only to be grabbed by his wrist.
“Sit down,” Hyunjoon says and pulls him down, making Wooje stumble backward with an offended noise and land beside him on the stairs. Wooje looks at Hyunjoon disapprovingly and opens his mouth to argue before stopping halfway because Hyunjoon is already staring at the sunset straight ahead. So Wooje just leans back against the stairs with a quiet exhale.
This is kind of how it goes between them. Sometimes they talk for hours about absolutely nothing. Sometimes they walk aimlessly until Wooje’s legs hurt and Hyunjoon finally feels bad enough to make them stop somewhere for food. Sometimes they sit together in complete silence like this, shoulder to shoulder beneath the tree while the sky changes colors above the water. They just stay near each other constantly. Wooje never minds any version of it. He’s happy to keep Hyunjoon company. Or, maybe he’s just happy to have Hyunjoon as company. He’ll never admit that though.
Suddenly, Hyunjoon is stretching his legs and says, “Move.”
That is the only warning Wooje gets before Hyunjoon shifts sideways and unceremoniously invades his entire personal space. One second he’s sitting normally beside him, and the next he’s laying down across the stairs with his head settling directly onto Wooje’s lap. He adjusts once, getting comfortable, then closes his eyes with a quiet sigh like Wooje’s lap was specifically designed for this purpose.
This isn’t new for them, and it isn’t weird enough for Wooje to make fun of Hyunjoon or tell him to get the hell up because Hyunjoon has spent years doing whatever he wants around Wooje until it stopped feeling strange. Wooje kind of likes it. He likes the weight of Hyunjoon resting against him. He kind of likes Hyunjoon.
Wooje lets out a content sigh and lightly nudges Hyunjoon’s shoulder. “Don’t you have a history exam this Thursday?” he asks. “Something about the Great Depression… or whatever.”
Hyunjoon hums without opening his eyes. “So?”
“So,” Wooje smiles despite himself, “when are you planning to study?”
Hyunjoon shifts slightly against his lap, one arm falling over his stomach. “Minhyung takes the same history class,” he says lazily. “I’m planning to copy off him.”
That immediately makes Wooje snort.
“Oh yeah,” he says dryly, “because Minhyung is known to be really good at history.”
“Hey,” Hyunjoon finally opens his eyes and protests, grinning. “He passed the last exam, okay? He knows his shit.”
Wooje rolls his eyes, “He just knows enough.”
“He knows more than me.”
“That’s because you never study it.”
Then Wooje’s phone suddenly starts ringing. Hyunjoon immediately groans, “Don’t answer it.”
Wooje pulls his phone out anyway while Hyunjoon complains beneath him. Wooje squints at the screen. “Oh,” he says. “It’s Sanghyeok.”
“Why is he calling you instead of me?” Hyunjoon asks incredulously.
“Because you always have your phone on silent.”
“That’s because—”
“Also because he trusts me more.”
“That’s—yeah, okay.”
Wooje grins triumphantly before answering the call. “Hello?”
Sanghyeok’s signature tired voice greets him instantly: “Where are you guys?”
Wooje glances down, Hyunjoon looks utterly unbothered sprawled across his lap, staring up at the sky now instead of closing his eyes again.
“I’m with Hyunjoon,” Wooje says. “We’re just sitting by the lake.”
There’s a brief pause, then Sanghyeok says, “Tell Hyunjoon to come home. He has two exams to study for.”
Wooje’s mouth immediately forms a silent O of betrayal. He slowly lowers the phone away from his ear to stare down at Hyunjoon, “Why didn’t you tell me you have two exams?”
Hyunjoon looks genuinely confused. “I didn’t know I had two exams.”
“You didn’t know?”
“What’s the other one?”
Wooje blinks. “Wait, I didn’t ask.”
Sanghyeok says something on the other line and Wooje tries not to laugh. “Okay,” he says obediently. “I’ll drag him home.”
Hyunjoon immediately protests from below him. “Traitor.”
Wooje hangs up the phone. “Sanghyeok says you’re failing school.”
Hyunjoon’s expression doesn’t change. “You’re slandering me.”
“Maybe stop failing…”
“I am not failing,” Hyunjoon says sternly. “I simply don’t care enough to get anything better than passing grades.”
“You looked like you cared a lot after math midterms.”
“That was different.”
“How?”
“I actually studied for that.”
Wooje bursts out laughing. Eventually, Wooje does manage to drag Hyunjoon home, ignoring his complaints because he stops talking at one point anyway.
🎶
Hyunjoon passes both exams anyway, with minimal cheating, as he likes to emphasize.
Wooje finds out during lunch break when Hyunjoon appears at his classroom door looking unbearably smug. The second Wooje spots him leaning against the frame in his loosened uniform, he already knows he’s about to be insufferable regarding something.
A few people from Wooje’s class glance toward the doorway automatically. That happens a lot whenever Hyunjoon comes by—and when Minseok and Minhyung come by—perks (or drawbacks) of having more older friends than same-age friends, Wooje supposes.
Hyunjoon lifts a paper dramatically the moment Wooje walks over. Wooje narrows his eyes, “What.”
“Guess who passed history.”
Wooje blinks. Then immediately: “No way.”
Hyunjoon looks offended. “What kind of reaction is that?”
Wooje doesn’t respond. He snatches the paper from Hyunjoon’s hand to inspect it. “You weren’t kidding,” he grins, “Minhyung does know his shit.”
Hyunjoon laughs in disbelief, “I did not stay up two whole nights with Sanghyeok just for you to give all the credit to Minhyung.”
Well, that is true. Wooje knows how hard Hyunjoon studied for the two exams, he just said that to get under his skin. That being said—
“What about algebra?” Wooje asks curiously.
Hyunjoon relaxes and winks at Wooje, and suddenly Wooje can feel the heat reaching his neck. Does he have to do that?
“Passed that too,” Hyunjoon replies smugly.
He looks quite happy, actually, it’s kind of rubbing off on Wooje too. No matter how much Hyunjoon says he doesn’t care about school—in reality, he kind of does. Which is probably why Hyunjoon suddenly hooks an arm around Wooje’s neck and announces: “I’m treating you to drinks.”
“Shit—” Wooje nearly stumbles forward. “Please find someone else to torture.”
Hyunjoon just ignores him. He turns towards Wooje and has this ridiculously stupid—and annoyingly attractive—smile on his face. “Meet me after school, Woojeng,” he ruffles Wooje’s hair and takes off to do whatever it is he does when he doesn’t have to worry about stupid exams.
Meet me after school. Wooje smiles to himself subconsciously before turning back towards his room because huh. Wooje waits for him everyday after school anyway, but the invitation is still sweet.
The afternoon outside is bright and windy by the time they leave school.
Wooje follows Hyunjoon into the convenience store without much thought, hands shoved into his blazer pockets while Hyunjoon heads straight for the drink refrigerators.
Hyunjoon grabs his usual drink immediately. Dr. Pepper. Wooje lingers longer, looking through the drinks. Recently, very unfortunately, he’s developed a liking for Sprite, which is irritating because he spent years making fun of Hyunjoon, Minseok, and Minhyung for drinking carbonated drinks constantly. Now he understands the appeal. Well—kind of.
“Traitor,” Hyunjoon says the moment he sees the green bottle in Wooje’s hand.
Wooje scowls. “Shut up.”
“You used to say soda tastes like—what was it?” Hyunjoon furrows his eyebrows, “oh, yeah—like TV static.”
“It still kind of does.”
Hyunjoon grins and opens his mouth to say something, so Wooje clicks his tongue and walks away before Hyunjoon can continue bullying him. He talks a lot for someone who drinks Dr. Pepper willingly.
A few minutes later, they end up sitting on the stairs under the tree, they somehow always end up here. The late afternoon sky has softened into a more purple and pink hue; the water remained warm and glowing, like it had been holding sunlight all day just to spill it back out at sunset.
Wooje opens his Sprite carefully, immediately wincing when carbonation fizzes aggressively near the top. Hyunjoon watches him with a smile, drinking his own drink with visible amusement. Wooje finally takes a sip, cold sweetness and carbonation hit his tongue instantly. The fizz still feels strange, prickling at the back of his throat, but lately he’s started liking that too. Maybe because Hyunjoon always buys sodas. Maybe because Wooje has unconsciously started picking up pieces of Hyunjoon after spending this many years around him.
“Give me a sip.”
Wooje looks at Hyunjoon, the taste of Sprite still fresh on his tongue. Hyunjoon’s already holding one hand out lazily toward the Sprite bottle. Wooje stares for a second, then hands him the bottle. Then, because his brain apparently enjoys ruining his life, he blurts:
“I read somewhere that drinking from the same bottle is like an indirect kiss.”
Wooje seriously considers leaving this town and never coming back.
Hyunjoon shoots him a weird, confused look. Wooje watches as Hyunjoon drinks from the bottle without hesitation anyway. Watches the way Hyunjoon tilts the bottle back slightly. Watches his throat move when he swallows. Watches his mouth rest against the exact place Wooje drank from seconds earlier.
There’s something small and warm fluttering violently inside Wooje’s chest, it’s enough to make his stomach feel weird and make his mind kindle hope. It’s so, so dangerous.
Hyunjoon hands him the Sprite back and their conversation drifts naturally after that into nonsense again. How a student in Hyunjoon’s class picked up a fight with the algebra teacher over one mark, how Minseok threatened Hyunjoon with violence because he said that Alice In Chains are overrated (he was bluffing, of course. Hyunjoon would never say that if not purely with the intention to piss Minseok off), how Minhyung has been wanting to sign up for a provisional driving license.
Wooje keeps thinking about soda bottles and indirect kisses and Hyunjoon.
🎶
Wooje can’t sleep.
Not his first time being unable to sleep—but he feels rather fidgety anyway. He spends nearly an hour staring at the ceiling in the dark while the digital clock beside his bed changes numbers painfully slowly. His room is quiet except for the soft rattling of tree branches against his window whenever the wind picks up. His mind just won’t shut up tonight.
He reaches blindly for his phone beneath the blanket and squints at the brightness, again. It reads 2:24 AM. Normal people are asleep during this hour. Thankfully for Wooje, Hyunjoon has never been normal.
Wooje opens their chat and types before he can think too hard about it.
[2:25 AM] wooje: you up?
Wooje stares at the chat until he sees that the text is read, and his stomach does something stupid at the speed of the response.
[2:25 AM] hyunjoonie: nope
Wooje rolls his eyes.
[2:25 AM] wooje: i’m bored
[2:26 AM] hyunjoonie: listen to music then
Wooje stares at the screen in betrayal. It’s not like he’s expecting Hyunjoon to come and relieve him of his boredom but he could have a better response. Nevertheless, it’s offensive of him to think Wooje hasn’t done that already. Wooje narrows his eyes at the phone like Hyunjoon can somehow feel his disappointment through it.
[2:26 AM] wooje: wow you’re sooo helpful
[2:26 AM] hyunjoonie: i know
Wooje drops his phone and shifts on the bed dramatically. He feels like staying in the dark room is only making his thoughts louder. Before he can reconsider anything, Wooje sits up and puts on his glasses. Five minutes later he’s climbing out through his bedroom window. Carefully so—this isn’t technically his first time sneaking out though the window, but it’s also not something he does often enough to be graceful at it. One wrong move and the window frame nearly knocks against the wall loudly enough to give him a heart attack.
Wooje freezes, and waits. When no responses are heard and no lights turn on, he exhales quietly in relief before finally dropping onto the ground below.
The night air is cool immediately against his skin. It feels nice, way nicer than his room. Especially this late because the streets are emptier, the streetlights cast pale yellow across sidewalks, and somewhere nearby, insects chirp endlessly beneath the darkness.
Wooje crosses his arms over his chest and walks. He doesn’t really think about where he’s going. Wooje is a creature of habit—he likes familiarity. There is no place more familiar to him than their spot (not completely true; Wooje’s bedroom, Minseok’s house, and Sanghyeok’s house are also equally familiar, but Wooje escaped from his bedroom and he’ll probably get in trouble if he goes into either of Minseok or Sanghyeok’s places so their spot it is).
The lake always feels different at night. During the day it’s warm and familiar and alive with the birds’ singing. During sunsets it turns golden and beautiful in ways Wooje’s never gotten tired of. And at night—it kind of feels like a secret.
The long staircase leading downward disappears into shadows. The water reflects fragments of moonlight in soft ripples below. Wind brushes through leaves overhead in slow waves while insects hum endlessly around the grass.
Wooje loves it. He loves the quiet there, loves how the darkness never feels lonely in this place and how his thoughts don’t get louder.
He’s halfway down the path when he notices someone already sitting beneath the tree. Wooje slows. The figure turns slightly at the sound of footsteps.
Then immediately coughs, trying—and failing very obviously—to hide the cigarette between his fingers.
Wooje blinks dumbfoundedly. Hyunjoon squints back at him through the dark.
“Could warn a man, Wooje.”
For a second, Wooje just stares and thinks about his luck. Because somehow, the person he least expected to find here is the exact person he wanted to see most. Wooje wants to pinch himself because he might as well be dreaming.
Then his eyes drop to the cigarette again.
“When did you start smoking?”
He walks closer while speaking, sneakers scraping softly against the stairs before he drops down beside Hyunjoon naturally.
Hyunjoon huffs smoke sideways into the night air. “Why do you care?”
“I don’t,” Wooje says immediately with a shrug. Then, after a pause, he stands again, “Pretty sure Sanghyeok will though.”
Hyunjoon clicks his tongue in annoyance instantly and grabs Wooje’s wrist before he can even take a full step away. “Sit.”
Wooje laughs quietly under his breath but lets himself get tugged back down anyway.
Wooje watches as Hyunjoon takes another drag while staring out toward the dark lake below them. The cigarette glows orange briefly between his fingers before dimming again.
“I took some from Sanghyeok’s cupboard,” Hyunjoon says eventually. “Haven’t been smoking for too long.”
Wooje smiles faintly. “Why were you going through Sanghyeok’s cupboard?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know, Wooje-ah?”
It’s late. Wooje sneaked out of his home through his bedroom window and Hyunjoon definitely didn’t tell Sanghyeok before leaving. They probably shouldn't be here at all. If either of them got caught right now, they’d probably never hear the end of it.
Wooje wants to be with Hyunjoon all the time anyway.
He glances sideways. Hyunjoon looks really handsome—even in the dark. The moonlight catches faintly against his skin and messy hair. Wooje’s chest suddenly aches with unbearable fondness.
Before his brain fully catches up to what he’s doing, Wooje reaches over and plucks the cigarette directly from Hyunjoon’s fingers. Hyunjoon doesn’t protest, he just looks at the cigarette before turning his gaze towards Wooje, watching silently while Wooje stares down at the cigarette now between his own fingers.
This is stupid. But something feels wrong with Wooje tonight: he’s too restless, too full of Hyunjoon.
Wooje exhales once before bringing the cigarette hesitantly to his lips and taking a drag, the smoke warming his throat and flooding his lungs harshly, unfamiliar and burning slightly. There’s a siren screaming somewhere in the back of Wooje’s mind saying that he shouldn’t really do this.
Wooje coughs almost immediately afterward, eyes squeezing shut briefly. Which he thinks is okay because it’s his first time. Wooje wonders what Hyunjoon looked like the first time he smoked. Whether he coughed too, whether he was nervous. Whether he sat somewhere alone. He feels weirdly sad that he wasn’t there to see it.
After a moment, Wooje puts the cigarette back near Hyunjoon’s hand silently, motioning for him to take it again. Their fingers brush briefly as Hyunjoon does. The cigarette glows faintly between Hyunjoon’s fingers as he looks at Wooje through the darkness, just slightly amused.
Then Hyunjoon smiles lazily, the corner of his mouth lifting as he glances at the cigarette and then back at Wooje.
"Doesn't that count as an indirect kiss?"
Wooje’s entire body goes still and he’s sure his heart skips a beat. Something is wrong with him tonight. Because normally, Wooje thinks before he acts—or tries to. Tonight every thought, every action feels reckless. Something is seriously wrong with him tonight, considering Wooje wants to check off all the things on his list of Don’ts.
Don’t want too much. Don’t ruin your friendship. Don’t kiss Hyunjoon.
Wooje moves closer anyway. Hyunjoon’s expression flickers slightly, and then Wooje is closing the remaining distance between them before his courage disappears completely. One spontaneous decision and he’s kissing Hyunjoon. It’s—it’s barely dramatic, just a soft, feathery press of lips against lips and Wooje keeps the kiss still because he genuinely has no idea what he’s doing. His eyes squeeze shut immediately, heartbeat pounding so loudly inside his chest he’s convinced Hyunjoon must be able to hear it too.
Wooje pulls back after just a few seconds because the realization that he actually just did that seeps in and his brain is unable to function.
Hyunjoon is staring at him, completely stunned and wide-eyed and Wooje is kind of sure he fucked up. But before Wooje can start apologizing or jumping into the lake to avoid embarrassment forever, Hyunjoon is leaning forward and closing the gap between them again.
Wooje’s breath catches as Hyunjoon kisses him. Then there’s the feeling of Hyunjoon’s lips moving against his and oh god—he thinks it nearly kills him on the spot because Wooje actually forgets how to breathe. He’s feeling warm all over, and every tiny movement suddenly feels amplified.
Hyunjoon shifts closer instinctively. Wooje can feel it—the way the older exhales softly against him, the slight tilt of his head, the hesitant but unmistakable motion of kissing him back properly. Hyunjoon’s lips are warm, softer than Wooje expected and he tastes faintly of smoke. Wooje finally gets it: finally gets the appeal. He finally understands why people write songs about this and what Sixpence None The Richer talked about in Kiss Me.
One of Wooje’s hands hovers awkwardly in the air because apparently he also forgot what humans are supposed to do with their arms while kissing. His other hand braces against the stair beside him instead.
Hyunjoon’s fingers slowly loosen around the cigarette, it drops forgotten onto the stairs below them, the ember dimming against the concrete. Then Hyunjoon’s hands slide around Wooje’s waist and the touch sends a sharp shiver all the way up Wooje’s spine. He almost melts right there.
Hyunjoon pulls him closer firmly, and suddenly Wooje’s entire body feels fuzzy and unbearably light, like he’s floating somewhere just slightly above himself. The kiss is clumsy—neither of them really knows what they’re doing but they keep kissing anyway, awkward and soft and enough to make Wooje feel dizzy.
Wooje’s hands finally figure themselves out enough to clutch at Hyunjoon properly—one settling awkwardly against his shoulder, the other slowly sliding up from his shoulder until Wooje’s fingers brush against the back of Hyunjoon’s neck. Hyunjoon exhales softly against Wooje’s mouth at the touch.
Wooje thinks he could probably stay this way forever.
Eventually, though, biology cruelly intervenes, and they pull apart for the drastic human need of air.
Wooje opens his eyes slowly, breathing harder than he should be from one kiss. Hyunjoon’s glasses are crooked now, Wooje can physically feel his own pair pressed awkwardly against his face too.
A second passes, and then Wooje laughs breathlessly, a disbelieving laugh because this actually feels unreal.
Wooje blurts out, “That was better than any indirect kiss.”
Hyunjoon chuckles. “Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Wooje can’t stop staring at Hyunjoon. His lips are red, slightly swollen, and Wooje’s stomach flips violently. He kind of wants to kiss him again.
So he does.
He leans in again, and presses his lips against Hyunjoon’s. This kiss is not as clumsy as the previous one, somehow, like they’re already getting the hang of it—like it’s familiar already.
After a few seconds, though, Hyunjoon pulls back slightly. Wooje blinks. Then Hyunjoon reaches up and carefully takes Wooje’s glasses off.
“Oh.”
“Hold on,” Hyunjoon mutters softly. His voice sounds a little hoarse.
Then Hyunjoon removes his own glasses too and sets both pairs beside them on the stairs. He turns back and holds Wooje’s face gently, pulls him close and kisses him again. This time, there’s nothing awkward pressing between them anymore.
Wooje can’t help grinning against Hyunjoon’s mouth, happiness bubbling out of him too fast to contain properly. A small laugh escapes him mid-kiss.
Hyunjoon smiles too, lips brushing lightly against Wooje’s as he murmurs, “What?”
Wooje doesn’t answer, just keeps kissing him, because how exactly is he supposed to explain the feeling of kissing his crush and best friend at their spot—the same tree they’ve sat and bickered under for years—when suddenly nothing feels the same anymore?
After some time, they separate again, both breathing heavier now, foreheads nearly brushing from how close they still are. Wooje’s chest feels impossibly light, like something inside him finally unraveled completely.
They pull away from each other completely at one point. Wooje still feels warm, somehow. His gaze drifts downward absently, settling on the discarded cigarette still resting on the stair below.
Then, quietly, Wooje says, “Does this mean like…” Wooje suddenly feels strangely shy, “we’re like, dating now?”
Hyunjoon looks at him immediately, almost defensive. “You don’t want to?”
Wooje pouts at once. “When did I say that?”
Hyunjoon’s shoulders loosen slightly in relief, he chuckles, “Sorry.”
Wooje stares at him for a few seconds. Then, because he feels brave tonight in a way he never has before, he says the thing he's been carrying around for years.
"I really like you, you know."
For the first time all night, Hyunjoon seems genuinely flustered.
He immediately looks away. And that alone makes warmth explode through Wooje’s chest because Hyunjoon almost never gets shy like this. Except tonight, apparently. Even now, in the darkness, Wooje can see the faint flush creeping across his face.
“I like you too,” Hyunjoon mumbles.
Wooje’s face grows hotter instantly. But he's waited too long for this opportunity.
“What was that?” He asks cheekily.
Hyunjoon groans immediately.
"Don't start."
"I didn't hear you."
“Yes, you did.”
“Maybe say it louder?”
Hyunjoon narrows his eyes before suddenly lunging toward him.
Wooje yelps, “Hey—!”
Then Hyunjoon starts tickling him mercilessly.
Wooje nearly falls sideways on the stairs laughing helplessly while trying to shove him away. “Hyunjoon—stop!”
“Annoying little brat.”
“I thought you like this annoying little brat!”
“That was before you started running your mouth.”
Wooje laughs harder, squirming uselessly while Hyunjoon grins above him. Maybe Wooje was wrong—some things still feel the same. There’s just no more confusion or wondering—just them.
Eventually they collapse back against the stairs breathless, smiling stupidly. Wooje turns to look at Hyunjoon, and sitting there under the night sky with his heart racing and his lips still tingling, Wooje realizes how much he really wants this. How much he wants Hyunjoon. He feels giddy thinking about how he can finally want Hyunjoon without the guilt that came attached with it. There are no loud thoughts in Wooje’s mind and no ache inside his chest anymore, only affection and warmth and it feels perfect.
He stretches his hands over his head and stands up. “Let’s go home.”
Wooje isn’t even slightly fazed when Hyunjoon grabs his wrist and yanks him right back down beside him.