Work Text:
Yet another sunny day in the literature club. Sayori sits at her desk, working on a poem which she had forgotten to write yesterday, one of her legs bouncing up and down preoccupiedly as she tries to find inspiration for her poem.
She can hear Yuri and Natsuki chattering nearby, she heard them talking a bit about the news. Apparently there was a mass infection of this new disease called the hanahaki disease. Sayori could hear them talking about how plenty of people have been dying due to supposed disease.
However quickly drifts her mind back to the poem, letting her hand flow freely across the paper. The ink stains the paper as she writes her poem.
As she writes this poem a few things rest on her mind.
The weather
Her bed
Her stomachs soft growls
The MC
This combination results in poem as read,
“Dear sunshine
The way you glow through my blinds in the morning
It makes me feel like you missed me.
Kissing my forehead to help me out of bed.
Making me rub the sleepy from my eyes.
Are you asking me to come out and play?
Are you testing me to wish away a rainy day?
I look above. The sky is blue.
It's a secret, but I test you too.
If it wasn't for you, I could sleep forever.
But I'm not mad.
I want breakfast”
She sighs and drops the pen, her gaze traveling across the classroom. Sayori wondered where the mc was.
“Hes probably just late… maybe class is holding him up today.”
She thinks to herself, however her thoughts are disrupted by the sound of the classroom doors opening. Yuri and Natsuki's conversation die down as all their eyes travel to who it was.
It's Monika!
She enters the room, her bright green eyes and sweet smile is very familiar with everyone in the room. She stops in the middle of the classroom, her ponytail which was swaying side by side slowly stops.
“Sorry guys for being late, piano practice was holding me up again.”
She said looking really sorry. Natsuki answers, her high pitched voice filling the room.
“It's alright, we were all occupying ourselves anyway. Hmph.”
Sayori nods in agreement, smiling sweetly with a hum. Yuri doesn't say anything, keeping her quiet demeanor.
“Anyway! I see MC isn't here, so we’ll be starting without him for today. I hope everyone of you guys finished your poems because it's time to exchange them!”
Monika said, her eyes drift to the other members. Natsuki smiled confidently, standing up.
“Well I'm pretty sure everyone here is finished so lets get started already!! Once we’re finished, me and Yuri planned on making a tea party with cupcakes!”
Monika smiles and chuckles sweetly
“That's wonderful Natsuki, then lets start!”
With all that said the four girls then go and exchange poems. They each go around showing each other their poems. For the first round, Sayori and Natsuki went together. They both finish each other's poems, Sayori finishes Natsuki's poem first. Probably because Natsuki's handwriting was very cute and simple, just like the poem which made it easy to read.
“Woahh! Natsuki i love it! This is so cute and-”
“It is NOT cute! This is clearly talking about being judged and hated for having harmless interests! If you think that’s cute then I don't know what to tell you!”
She defends, sayori’s mouth is left slightly agape for a quick second before smiling shyly and rubbing the back of her neck
“Sorry! Meheh my bad, you’re right, TOTALLY not cute..”
She looks aside, Natsuki simply lets out a loud and defiant tch, looking away before speaking up.
“Your poem is good but it's pretty simple.. And it’s unfinished too.”
She says. Ah, natsuki really is too stubborn to ever compliment anyone. Sayori giggles, her voice filled with joy.
“Awwwhh thanks!”
Natsuki humphs. The two exchange a few words but soon they switch partners. This time, Sayori pairs with Yuri.
They hand each other their poems and take a read. Sayori is visibly impressed at all the big words and symbolism. Yuri reads Sayori's poem a few times as she does with everyone, her facial expression looks concentrated as she gathers her words. Yuri’s voice was soft but sure.
“I really like this.”
She says bluntly before continuing, adding on as to why she likes it.
“This is quite impressive if I may say so myself, the way you express so much emotion with such few words. It’s not exactly in my preference of writing style but I must admit this is still very talented. With a few tweaks or even just a bit more structure this could become a true masterpiece, Sayori.”
Yuri’s voice was calm, getting carried away with her critique on Sayori’s poem. Sayori listens to it all with a contemplative face. She didn’t mind Yuri’s long rants, in fact she enjoyed it. It was a bit refreshing having someone else think so much about something you write.
Yuri looks embarrassed right after she finishes her rant, looking at the wall, Sayori smiles.
“Omigawshh thanks Yuri! I can say the same for you. Your poem has so many big words and stuff, it really shows how smart you are.”
She grins widely, Yuri still looking away shyly, she always gets shy when others compliment her writing style as for it is something she takes great pride in.
“Thank you Sayori”
She mutters, Sayori smiles and continues.
“This piece makes me feel super cozy! You describe the scene very well, it makes me really feel like I’m in the moment!”
Yuri hums in appreciation as she opens her mouth to speak, yet just as she’s about to talk Monika speaks up to say it's time to rotate partners, Sayori and Yuri exchange a few words before they go to their last partner. Sayori is now paired with Monika! They both read each other's poems.
“Monika, this is really good, just as expected from our favorite class president!”
Sayori smiles, Monika chuckles at the compliment, a soft shade of pink tints her cheek.
“Awh, thank you Sayori! Same for you too, this is quite impeccable”
The two girls giggle together, offering a bit of criticism as long as things they enjoyed about each other's poems. Soon enough, everyone is done exchanging poems!
The four girls sit together at a table. Each one of them had a cupcake and a cup of tea. Well, Sayori had two cupcakes since the mc wasn’t there to take his piece. Naturally, Sayori insisted she have his cupcake.
“Now that we’ve exchanged poems we can finally relax”
Sayori says with a sigh, leaning back and taking a big bite out of one of Natsuki’s cupcakes.
“Has anything interesting happened lately?”
Monika asks absentmindedly, cup of tea in hand. Not taking a sip just yet. Yuri shifts around in her chair looking at the table.
“Not much, But I saw something on the news today, it was quite alarming.”
She takes a sip of her tea before continuing.
“It seems that there’s a new disease and apparently it’s very dangerous.”
Monika looks a bit worried, listening at what Yuri says.
“It’s called the Hanahaki disease, doctors say that so far the suspected cause of it is unrequited love. I’m not entirely sure on how it works but it seems quite worrying. They say that flowers will grow in your lungs.. And in the final stages it’ll sprout out of your lungs and kill you”
Sayori’s gaze grew into an unsettled frown, they all looked intrigued now.
“Doctors are trying to find a way to cure it but so far they haven’t found any solutions. Well, actually they said there were around 7 survivors out of hundreds and the survivors said that once they confessed their love and the person of interest reciprocated they started feeling better.”
“Woah, that’s so weird, like magic or something huh?”
Natsuki said, Yuri nodded right after. Sayori, having already finished both cupcakes, speaks with her mouth full.
“That’s so scary.. I really hope we’re all okay..”
They all nod in union.
“S-Sorry if I scared you guys..! I j-just wanted to warn you b-because I was worried..!”
Yuri says shyly. Monika reassures her.
“Yuri, it’s okay. We know you just wanted to warn us, we all appreciate it very much right?”
Monika looks at Natsuki and Sayori, Natsuki rolls her eyes
“Yeah yeah..”
She says dismissively, while on the other hand Sayori nods enthusiastically.
“It’s very thoughtful of you Yuri!!”
Yuri blushes and looks at the classroom wall.
“A-Anyway, If I see any more updates I’ll update you three.”
She says softly, finally taking a small bite of her cupcake. The four girls then resume their conversation with more casual topics, the festival, plans, something funny they may have seen, etc.
Soon enough, the skies outside start tinting orange, the sun setting and the clouds, the puffy clouds sailing with the wind, indicating that it’s time to go back home. All four girls say goodbye to each other as they start packing up. Monika as the class president stays longer then to rest to clean the classroom after school before going home.
Sayori leaves the classroom second last, walking by herself back home. Her thoughts couldn’t help but drift to the mc, she wondered why he didn’t come today. Maybe he was too busy or something, who knows.
Soon enough she arrives back at home. She gets inside, kicking her shoes off and tossing her backpack onto the floor. She climbs up her stairs opening the door to her room.
Her room was messy as always. Clothes tossed around the floor, crumpled sheets of paper scattered around. Books and cups she was too lazy to bring to the kitchen rest upon her desk. She doesn’t even think about any of it, instead she makes her way toward her unmade bed, sitting lazily across it all.
Once laid upon her bed, she lets out a deep exhale she didn’t know she was holding in, trying to fall asleep, trying to not let the dark thoughts take over.
She lets out a small, quiet sob. Wiping her eyes as she ponders in bed.
“Why am I so useless?”
“Why am I like this?”
“Why am I such a burden?”
“Why am I so selfish?”
“Why can’t I be happy no matter what I do?”
“Why can’t I just be normal?”
“Why?”
She thinks to herself.
She just wished she could die, in fact, she wished she had never been born at all. She kept sobbing, she didn’t even know why she was sobbing. It was so pathetic, she had no reason to cry, she thought to herself. Yet, she couldn’t stop no matter how hard she tried. Her mind wanders to the mc, she starts cursing herself for being such a burden to the one person she truly loved. But then suddenly, just as she was about to let out another sob, she coughed instead. This wouldn’t be a problem but this wasn’t just any other cough. She looked at her hands as she felt something soft land in them.
A singular white petal.
Sayori doesn’t react instantly. Instead her light blue eyes stare at the petal in shock. All the light in her eyes disappears as she stares at it as if it was mocking her. Slowly she sits up, her back hunched and her head low.
Her tears fall onto the petal, she wipes her eyes and gets up quickly, making her way to her pc. Sayori’s thoughts quickly drift to what Yuri told them today.
“Hanahaki disease symptoms”
Click. Search.
Her eyes quickly scan the page in a frantic hurry. It said that first comes coughing, flower petals occasionally will fall out. Second, as the flowers grow, more and more petals sprout. Third, chest pain, difficulty breathing, shortness of breath. Fourth, the severe pain, intense pain as if you’re being stabbed in the lungs as the flowers take root. Fifth, you start coughing out full on flowers, blood, some cases even report flowers coming out or staining the person. And finally, due to the flowers growing it becomes too hard to cough out and once it forces itself out the victim will suffocate and choke on the flower, leading to death.
Sayori stares at the screen in dread, her pupils now reduced to a hollow dot that was trembling violently. She lets out a shaky breath staring at the petal in her palm, thinking maybe it was just her vision playing tricks on her, something. Anything. Anything that wasn’t this.
But no, this very much was real. She quickly puts her hand back on the cursor
“Hanahaki disease cure”
Click. Search.
She clicks on a few recent articles but, it’s all the same. However she finds one news article that had something. A bit different, a bit of hope.
The new outbreak in the Hanahaki disease can be cured by the other person reciprocating feelings of the victim. However, scientists and doctors are currently working together to try and find a procedure that can remove said flowers from the lungs. However this surgery is still in beta mode and very risky.
Sayori breathes heavily, was that really it? If the MC doesn't reciprocate, her last chance is some work in progress, beta surgery which she doesn’t even know how to get in contact with to try?
Sayori quickly shuts off her computer. Storming to her bed, still clutching the petal. She curls up in her bed, nuzzling her wet, tear covered pillow, hoping the next morning maybe she’ll wake up and it won’t be there, maybe it is all a dream..
The next morning, she wakes up, a bit lightheaded. She sits up in her bed, checking her hand.
It’s still there.
That singular, crumpled, white petal.
At this point, she’d lost all hope, staring at the petal before putting it on her windowsill. She holds her face in her hands, wondering what to do.
She wouldn’t really mind if she died.
But,
She doesn’t want the MC to reject her..
She takes in a shaky inhale of air before getting up. Her legs are a bit shaky as she makes her way to her closet. She puts on her uniform sloppily as usual, too lazy to button the buttons.
She slowly makes her way to her desk, taking a piece of paper to write a poem. She had around twenty minutes before school started so she decided to quickly write something.
This time, as she writes she can’t help the dark thoughts from affecting her work.
As she writes this poem a few things rest on her mind.
Her friends,
How pathetically sad she is
The thought of failing them,
Burdening them.
This combination results in poem as read,
“Bottles,
I blow dust off my bottle caps.
It doesn’t feel like time elapsed.
My empty shelf could use some more.
My friends look through my locked front door.
Finally, all done. I open up, and in come my friends.
In they come, in such a hurry. Do they want my bottles that much?
I frantically pull them from the shelf, one after the other.
Holding them out to each and every friend.
Each and every bottle.
But every time I let one go, it shatters against the tile between my feet.
Happy thoughts, happy thoughts, happy thoughts in shards, all over the floor.
They were supposed to be for my friends, my friends who aren’t smiling.
They’re all shouting, pleading. Something.
But all I hear is echo, echo, echo, echo, echo
Inside my head.”
She gets up, heading down stairs unmotivated. Sayori picks up her backpack and places the poem into the backpack. Just as she goes to grab a piece of toast she notices she’s already running late, quickly heading outside.
Once outside she sees the MC, a bright smile quickly floods her past sorrow.
“Heyyy!! Waittup for meeee!~”
She yells from across the street. Catching up to the MC. He looked reluctant to wait but ended up waiting for Sayori anyway.
“Ahhh!! MC I overslept again hehe!!”
Sayori whines, leaving the MC sighing but smirking.
“You say that as if that’s a good thing.”
Sayori laughs as the two of them keep walking
“Whatever I just need to fix my sleep schedule..”
There was a small pause before she continued
“Why weren’t you at the club yesterday?”
Finally, their eyes meet. The MC looks a bit reluctant to answer, knowing Sayori will probably scold him for his answer.
“Well, You see, class held me up yesterday and by the time I was free I thought it’d be a bit.. Intrusive for me to barge in while you four already started the meeting..”
Once he said that he could see Sayori puffing up her cheeks and frowning, her eyebrows furrowing.
“Seriously..?! It really wouldn’t be a bother!! Plus you had me worrying about you!”
The MC looks ahead at the street, avoiding her gaze.
“Sorry, next time I’ll know to come over even if I’m late.”
“You better!”
She says and then smiles sweetly
“But I’ll forgive you this time, hehe!”
She looks at him and then pats his shoulder, trying to get him to look at her which he does after she pats his shoulder.
“Hm?”
“What did you do yesterday after class?”
He pauses for a bit, thinking about it.
“I went home and watched anime.”
He says with a smirk before carrying on.
“I managed to finish two seasons of an anime I was watching.”
He says proudly.
“Ouh! Cool”
She looks at him, he senses her gaze on him and gives her a quick side eye making her look away quickly. The two of them keep making their way to school, Sayori humming a quiet song as they walk.
Then their hands abruptly brush..
Sayori squeaks, quickly curling her hand back to her hand. The MC looks at her, a small smirk on his face.
“Pfft, are you a plushie or something, why're you squeaking?”
He chuckles softly, Sayori looks away blushing in embarrassment.
“Meaniee!”
She simply says, still not looking at him. He then faces her while their walking, poking her cheek
“Silly~”
He mutters softly, a teasing smirk on his face. This makes Sayori’s cheeks nearly turn red as she looks at him shyly
“Uuuu”
She lets out a small whine. She looked so embarrassed, it was really cute. Finally, they arrive at school, making their way to their lockers and saying goodbye for now before each making their way to their respective classes.
After school, Sayori makes her way toward the literature club. As she enters she’s greeted with Monika and Natsuki in class, talking. Once they see her Monika calls her over to sit with them.
The three of them chat, waiting a while for Yuri and the MC to arrive before starting their poem exchange. They talk about a few books they read yesterday, occasionally also talking about Monika’s piano practice, Sayori was practically begging her to play for them one day, which Monika agrees to.
Around five to ten minutes pass before the door creaks open, It was Yuri and the MC.
Both entering the class together. Sayori could feel her mind slowly drifting into deep thought, spacing out. A painful feeling hits her chest, erupting the need to cough. Yet she holds it back, her eyes remain glued to Yuri and the MC who were now moving to sit with the three of them at the table.
Suddenly she snaps out of it, the sound of the MC calling her name snaps her out of it. She quickly looks at everyone, god, they were all staring at her. She flushes red, looking at the table before straightening up, smiling nervously.
“Sorry!! I was spacing out!”
She giggles dismissively. Monika’s gaze on her softens
“Are you okay, Sayori?”
She said softly. Was she really so obviously hurt..? She defensively puffs her cheeks and pouts.
“I swear, I really am! I just spaced out cause I remembered something, okay?!”
Monika sighs softly.
“If you say so…”
The conversation then continues, Sayori could occasionally feel the MC’s gaze lingering on her, almost as if trying to figure her out. Natsuki and Yuri were having another petty argument, this time over whether manga or novels are better.
“Novels are so long and boring, it’s for total losers Yuri!! Hmph!!”
Natsuki says, her face covered in blush as she glares at Yuri. Yuri looks at Natsuki in hurt.
“Th-That’s just your opinion Natsuki..! D-Don’t be so rude.”
They continue on. The conversation quickly switches up to their behaviors, specifically Natsukis’, Yuri now scolding Natsuki softly, telling her to have good manners. It was honestly quite cute and heartwarming, seeing the two of them interact.
The day wrapped up quickly, soon it was afternoon. The members all pack up as usual, Sayori and the MC walk home together as usual.
On the way back the walk was mostly quiet. The quiet that feels awkward and tense.
“Sayori,”
He speaks up, startling Sayori, she looks at him with a smile.
“Yeah! What’s up!”
She says in a sweet voice.
“What’s wrong, when me and Yuri came to class you were staring at us really intensely.”
Sayori pauses, she was really hoping he wouldn’t bring this up. Her gaze shifts to her feet, watching them move back and forth as they walk home.
“I swear it’s really nothing…”
She murmurs, The MC felt something was… off, but he decides to not pry any further.
“Uhm, tomorrow do you want to hang out or something maybe? It’s been a long time since we…”
Her voice drifts off. She looks back up at him, her gaze hopeful, eyes furrowed. He looks down at her and pats her head once.
“Sure, my place or your place?”
“Errr” She thinks for a bit “Yours?”
She smiles innocently, he nods
“Sounds good to me. Well, if you’re not busy you can come over right now, I don’t really have any plans and-”
Sayori cuts him off, her voice energetic and excited
“Yay!! Sounds great!”
She giggles softly. The two of them make their way to his house, he opens the door, letting her step in first. It’s been probably like 3 years since she last visited, so once she stepped in, she took a deep inhale of air, her eyes traveling everywhere as she took it all in again.
“Woahh! Looks so different from when I last came!”
She remarks. She quickly slips off her shoes and plops onto the sofa, giggling. MC follows, taking off his shoes and placing them neatly by the doorway before going and sitting next to Sayori.
“So what do you want us to do? We can watch tv, or…”
“Let’s watch a movie with snacks!!”
Sayori exclaims, the MC nods in agreement, getting up to go to the kitchen to fetch some popcorn. Sayori grabs the remote and switches through the channels until she finds a rom-com she likes.
The MC returns with a bag of cheddar popcorn, taking a seat next to Sayori and placing the bag of popcorn in the middle.
The two watch the movie together, it starts off with some cliche beginning. Sayori had already watched this movie plenty of times but she still liked it, it reminded her of the old times where she and the MC would have frequent movie nights..
In the middle of the movie she reaches to get some popcorn, her hand brushes his as they reach for the same piece. Sayori quickly gets her hand out of the bag, blushing but trying not to make a big deal out of it.
The movie played out well, Sayori occasionally had the urge to cough but in the end she managed to suppress it. Once the movie ended, it was dark outside. Sayori gets up stretching and looking at him.
“Thanks for having me over!! It was sooooo fun!!”
He smiles at her warmly
“No problem, it was fun having you over too.”
And with all that said, Sayori takes her leave, heading back home. Once she makes it home her demeanor changes. She slumps her shoulders, kicking shoes off, tossing backpack onto the floor and making her way to her room as she does every day.
She lies helplessly in her bed as usual, her thoughts drift to the MC. These past couple days after joining the literature club he has been hanging out with Yuri a bit… But the second Yuri enters Sayori’s thought she instantly starts coughing violently. Her hand goes up to cover her mouth as she coughed.
Multiple petals land onto her palm. One of them was stained in drops of blood. In this moment of pain the beautiful white petals felt like they didn’t belong, they looked far too graceful for Sayori’s room, all messy and dim. Sayori can feel tears prick her eyes but today she didn’t have energy to cry, no, not anymore.
Suddenly, the empty silence in her room is filled with the soft growl of her stomach. She hasn’t eaten anything today other than a cookie she bought in the cafeteria and the popcorn she shared with the MC at his place.
She slowly gets up, letting the petals fall onto the floorboards as she makes her way downstairs to the kitchen. She grabs a packet of ramen and boils it. She then grabs a fork and goes to sit on the sofa. Sayori eats her ramen in complete silence, her eyes glued onto the ramen as she takes one bite at a time, soon finishing it and tossing it in the garbage before laying on the sofa, sighing heavily.
Her eyelids feel heavy shortly after laying down, she feels too sleepy to get up and go to her room.
Eventually, Sayori can feel herself falling into a dream state soon. In this dream, she was in a dark void, all alone. She was calling out to her friends, trying to find them. She ran. She ran so much. And finally, she escaped the void. The void turned into a flowery and colorful scenery, a field filled with beautiful white lilies.
Sayori fell to her knees in this field, it was just so… so… beautiful. She lies down in the field looking up at the bright blue sky. This all felt so amazingly real..
However, the moment was cut short as she wakes up in a cold sweat instantly coughing roughly petals falling onto her lap. More than last time. She pants, trying to process what’s going on. One moment she was having such a wonderful dream and the next she woke up in this horrible agony. She mentally counts how many, there were at least fifteen.
No, no.. this can’t be real.. How was it progressing so fast, why..? She just wanted the pain to stop.
She gets up, almost falling down due to pure shock. She makes her way to the kitchen, turning on the sink and washing her face. She quickly goes to her backpack to get her phone. She goes through her contacts before clicking MC’s contact.
“Heya, I’ve been really wanting to get off my chest. Honestly I really like you and I’ve liked you for years now. I want to know if you feel the same or what but erm yeah when you see this pls text me back (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)”
She types out with shaky fingers, occasionally making typos but correcting them right after. Her thumb hovers over the send button, rereading the message a few times.
She didn’t have the heart to send it.
She quickly deletes the message and shuts her phone, putting it back in her backpack and making her way to her room. She lays in bed on her side, looking at the clock. It was two in the morning sharp. Sayori then rolls onto her back, staring at the ceiling until her drowsiness takes over and she falls back to sleep.
The next morning, she woke up still feeling a little bit uncomfortable but she recovered from last night. She gets to her desk and picks up a piece of paper. Sayori, pen in hand, begins writing. This poem was pretty basic and generic, she didn’t feel like she could get out exactly how she felt today on just a sheet of pen and paper.
Once she finishes her poem she changes into her school uniform, eats a slice of toast and gets going. She sees MC outside, he didn’t notice her yet, leading to her running after him like a desperate puppy. Eventually, he can hear Sayori’s panting and looks back, seeing her jogging towards him, he stops and waits.
“Hahhhh, hahhhh…”
She pants, clutching her knees as she tries to catch his breath. He looks at her sighing at how hopeless she is
“Overslept again?”
The MC said, she nodded wordlessly. Standing up straight after finally catching her breath.
“Heh~ Maybeee!!”
She giggles tirelessly while the MC chuckles at her persistence. They then start walking together to school.
Once they arrive at school the day plays out as usual, classes, lunch and then the club! Today all the members came on time, they each exchanged poems and hung out as usual, for this meeting they played a card game instead of the usual.
Then when the day ended and clubtime was over Sayori made her way to the MC before seeing something that made her heart hurt.
He was talking to Yuri.
She didn’t know why it hurt so much, they were just having a friendly conversation but seeing them together made her heart ache. Out of nowhere, the urge to cough overfloods her, too fast to stop. Sayori instantly turns around, facing a wall as she coughs violently into her hand, catching Natsuki’s attention.
Sayori didn’t look, but she could feel plenty of petals in her hand, she quickly clutched her hand into a fist as she heard Natsuki’s soft footsteps coming closer, turning to face her quickly with her hands behind her back before smiling forcedly.
“Hey Natsuki!!”
She says cheerfully, Natsuki looks at her skeptically. Looking her up and down before speaking.
“You alright?”
The question was simple yet Sayori hesitated. But she blurted out an answer before it would seem too suspicious.
“Y-Yup!! Don’t worry I think I’m just getting a minor cold or something”
She laughed nervously, Natsuki’s face indicated that she wasn’t buying it at all.
“Hmph, alright if you say so I guess. But if something’s wrong don’t you dare hide it!”
She scolds Sayori with a tinge of worry in her voice. Sayori laughs it off and nods before Natsuki packs up and leaves, waving her goodbye.
Sayori quickly throws the petals in the garbage before returning her gaze to the MC, Yuri and him were finally separated, she takes this as her chance to talk to him.
“Whatcha doin!!”
Sayori exclaims from behind, he slowly turns and looks at her.
“Packing up, silly”
Sayori nods, her bright blue eyes stare into his eyes for a while before speaking with a sweet smile.
“Wanna hang out again? We can hang out at my place today if you want!!”
The MC looks to the side, as if not sure how to put what he wants to say next into words.
“Ah, sorry.. Today I already had plans with Yuri..”
Once the words leave his lips the light in Sayori’s eyes dimmens, She instantly looks at the window out the classroom, her head lowering slightly in embarrassment and disappointment.
“A-Ah… s-sorry.”
Then, the overwhelming urge to cough, she couldn’t hold it back, she could already feel something crawling up her lungs. She quickly covers her mouth
“Sorry!”
She yells out and storms out of class, The MC stares at her running away, a wave of guilt floods him. He wanted to apologize and maybe offer to hang out tomorrow but she was already gone. Monika, Natsuki and Yuri stare at him, wondering what happened. Natsuki was now even more suspicious, walking up to him.
“What’s wrong with you!! What did you say, why’s she so upset!?”
Natsuki glares at him. He quickly puts up his hands in defense trying to explain that he just told her he was busy today and she stormed out and stuff but Natsuki wasn’t fully buying that that was it. Sayori never had such a dramatic outburst over someone just telling her that they're busy.. Natsuki now felt committed to do a bit of investigating.
Meanwhile, Sayori sprints to the nearest bathroom, rushing in and hovering over the sink before coughing her heart out. Her lungs were clenching painfully in her chest as she wheezed, trying to get whatever it was in her throat out. She eventually lets out one last painful cough. This time it wasn’t just petals.
A small bud.
A small bud stained in blood expels from her lungs.
Sayori pants for air, tears spill down her face in big drops. She stares at the bathroom sink in horror, falling to her knees and sobbing quietly.
She lets out a heartbreaking whine and coughs out two petals, they land on the cold bathroom floor. Sayori doesn’t even pay mind to them, simply trying to calm down.
Soon she gets up, quickly flushing the bud down the sink and wiping her tears away. She can’t have anyone see her like this. Sayori gets up, wiping a little spec of blood on her lip before rushing home, not trying to make contact with anyone.
She makes it home before it gets dark outside. Sayori instantly makes her way to the bathroom and coughs as much as she needed. A clutter of petals and blood stained her sink and once she finished she was left breathless.
She can feel her phone buzzing, Natsuki was calling her. Sayori clears her throat before answering.
“What’s up Natsuki”
She said, Sayori tried to sound cheerful, she really did. But she was just too exhausted to put up with this shit.
“Ugh. Just tell me what’s wrong already so I can help you dummy!!”
Sayori paused, she never heard Natsuki sound so.. Worried, as if on the verge of tears.
“If you don’t tell me I’m coming over and forcing you t-to tell me!!”
Her voice cracked in the middle of her words. Sayori was just now realizing that she was worrying her friends.. It makes her heart hurt, she doesn’t want to lie to them but at the same time she can’t let them know… right?
“I-I… uhm”
Sayori stutters out quietly.
“It’s nothing I swe-”
“Shut up!! Shut up with your stupid ‘It’s nothing’ when there clearly is something going on!!”
Natsuki said, a soft sob exiting her mouth.
“J-Just come over then, I don’t want to tell you over the phone..”
She mutters before instantly hanging up, overwhelmed with guilt and regret. Sayori sits down on the kitchen floor, her back pressed against the counter as she curls into a ball, hugging her knees to her chest and burying her face into her knees.
Around ten minutes later Sayori hears a knock at the door. Instinctively she heads to it and opens the door, out the doorway she sees a worried yet angry Natsuki crossing her arms. She instantly enters Sayori’s house without a word.
Sayori follows Natsuki as she sits on the sofa, looking at Sayori.
“Now tell me what’s wrong.”
She crosses her legs. Sayori takes a seat next to her, avoiding eye contact.
“It’s just…”
She isn’t sure if she should either tell Natsuki that she has the disease or that she just likes the MC.
“Promise you won’t tell anyone”
She looks into Natsuki’s bright pink eyes with hers, a worried gaze on Sayori’s face. If Yuri or the MC found out she doesn’t know what she’d do.
Natsuki nods
“Promise! Just tell me already!!”
Sayori tears up, letting out a big sigh.
“I-I think I’m in love..”
She admits, looking at the space beside her, Natsuki’s face relaxes, surprised that that would be the reason for all her strong emotions.
“Oh”
Natsuki didn’t even know how much further it went than just a small crush.
“Well! Who’s the lucky person~”
“Uhm, I-I like MC…”
She admits softly, Natsuki softly roles her eyes and smiles in defeat
“Seriously? You like that wacko?”
She giggles, looking up at Sayori’s blue eyes, for some reason, she didn’t look as amused.
“Mhm..”
“Well why don’t you just tell him you like him”
Natsuki says as if that’s the most obvious and simple thing ever. Sayori pauses, looking at her lap.
“I-I don’t know, I don’t think that’s gonna work.. and-”
“Well if you keep doubting yourself it surely won’t!!”
Natsuki scolds, nudging her.
“C’mon!! I can even help you out or give you tips or something!!”
She smirks, Sayori looks at Natsuki, a seed of hope builds within her
“Really..?”
Natsuki nods, sitting up straight.
“Yeah!! C’mon let’s do it tomorrow okay”
Sayori opens her mouth to speak, to correct Natsuki that tomorrow is way too early but Natsuki keeps talking before Sayori can say something.
“Pfft! Can’t believe I was so worried.. In the end it was just love playing tricks!”
She says and gets up, crossing her arms.
“Anyway, I recommend you tell him tomorrow after school or something, kay?”
Sayori nods shyly, the two then talk a bit more, Natsuki giving her tips on how to confront and say she likes him even though Natsuki wasn’t even good with words. She told Sayori to be blunt with it and confident, showing that you’re serious.
Then once it gets dark outside Natsuki leaves, letting Sayori sit on her sofa and think to herself. Sayori thinks of it over and over again, playing it out in her head as she imagines what it would be like.
She imagines what it’d be like if he reciprocated..
The thought makes her smile.
She imagines what it’d be like if he rejected.
The thought makes her cough out more petals.
She gets up and heads to bed, laying down as the scenarios keep playing in her head, what if he likes someone else, what if he secretly hates her, what if he likes her but platonically, what if what if what if. She can feel her mind drift to sleep as her eyelids grow heavy, slowly letting the sleep take over her.
The next morning, she overslept again. Not that she was surprised anymore. She gets up, writes a sloppy poem, eats toast and heads to school. Today was definitely going to be the day she confesses! She made sure of it.
Her and the MC walk together to school silently, her hand occasionally brushes his as they walk, Sayori speaks up once, trying to start some type of conversation.
“Soo… How was things with Yuri”
She mutters, Sayori could already feel petals threatening to spill but she swallows them down.
“Uh.. Good, We read together in my room, that’s kinda it”
He said, avoiding her gaze, trying to hide the slightest of flush on his cheeks, Sayori couldn’t hold it back anymore, turning her head to the side and coughing, letting the petals fall freely behind them as she tried to keep it to a minimum before turning to him with a faked but believable smile.
“Sweet!! So you're not busy today again right?”
He shakes his head
“Nope”
“No reason in particular, hehe”
She said and then the rest of the walk remained silent.
Once they make it to school they part ways and then meet again in the club. Everyone was on time again, Monika coming last due to her piano practices.
The day at the club plays out as usual, they exchange poems, plan for the festival and chat a bit before preparing to head home. Natsuki quickly reminds Sayori to not chicken out as she then leaves with the MC. They both walk back home as usual. However this time, instead of saying goodbye and going to their houses she stops in the middle of her tracks before leaving, tugging his sleeve gently.
“W-Wait”
She mutters, her face flushed as she looks away. He stops and turns to face her, looking at her curiously. The orangey hue of the sunset hitting her face, making her features stand out even more than usual.
“I’ve been wanting to get something off my chest.”
She finally makes eye contact, her lips press into a thin, nervous line as he speaks up.
“Sure, what is Sayori?”
She pauses, taking thorough inhales and exhales through her nose, her eyes dart around, looking anywhere but him before her eyes finally reach his. Her grip on his sleeve is still present as she speaks up, her voice a little shaky but still holding as much confidence as she could muster.
“I love you.”
She says bluntly, looking him dead in the eyes so he knew
She’s dead serious.
“Sayori.”
He started, the tone in his voice blunt as well as his gaze remaining right on her, his face was… too serious to be a good thing..
“I like Yuri, I’m sorry. I only see you as a friend.”
And just like that, Sayori felt her world falling apart. She froze, feeling a strange, sharp, agonizing pain in her lungs that felt as if it was getting pierced multiple times and squeezed.
Were they taking root already?
Her head falls down, staring at the ground between them, her usual bright blue eyes turn into a lifeless dark blue that held no joy. The MC can feel his stomach tightening, he felt really bad for having to reject her but he had to be honest, right?
Out of nowhere, Sayori falls to her knees a wave of tears overflowing her, falling down her face and dripping onto the cold pavement as they refill. The MC quickly bends over, trying to rub her shoulder but no reaction.
She lets out one singular heartbreakingly guttural sob. The sound could make anyone cry. Sayori’s shoulders slump as she clutches her head, letting out all the pain.
The MC, he’s not sure what to do, he stands there awkwardly bent over. Seeing her cry so helplessly because of him made him feel like the worst of the worst. He clenches his fists into a ball, frustrated at himself for not knowing how to help his best friend.
She slowly gets up, he can see her knees visibly trembling as she walks to her house in defeat. He contemplates whether to let her leave or to go try and comfort her or something, anything.
He quickly follows after her, grabbing her wrist, she turns around, her broken eyes look into his.
“I..- I’ll see you tomorrow, right?”
He said softly, she nodded once before leaving before he could say anything else. Once home, she rushes to her bathroom sink and coughs. Sayori coughed out three to four buds and petals, too many to count. She coughed until blood splattered on the sink.
She stared at the sink with her wide and empty eyes, the buds now bloomed into small pretty lilies stained in her blood. Staring at the flowers made her feel nauseous? Dizzy? She’s not completely sure but she could feel her head getting lighter, her knees weaker.
Thud
She hits the ground with a loud thud, passing out cold on the bathroom tiles.
Her eyelids flutter open, heavy. Her head hurts, almost as much as her heart, almost as much as the burning sensation in her lungs. She sits straight slowly, how long was she out for? It doesn’t matter to her anymore.
She gets up, washing the flowers down the drain and heading to her room, laying in bed. She doesn’t want to go to school. She glances at the clock above her door, watching it tick by the second. School had already started and she was still in bed. Why was she so damn pathetic that she can’t even wake up on time? She thinks to herself as she laid in bed.
She falls asleep yet again, she doesn’t have anything better to do anyway.
She wakes up in a dark void, yet again. This time she walks in it, slowly, not like she has anything to rush for anymore.
The void, it’s dark, lonely, empty, cold and warm at the same time. Just as she’s about to give up she feels something fall on her head. She picks it with her hand.
A beautiful, fully bloomed white lily.
It was so gorgeous, it didn’t belong in such a dark place. Sayori brings the flower to her nose before taking a soft inhale of the scent of the lily, closing her eyes to take it all in. It smelt refreshing and floral.
Her eyes open once more. Suddenly, she sees she’s in the same field as earlier. Except now, it was flooded with lilies, to the point where it was overwhelming, even a bit… scary. Sayori doesn’t panic yet, after all it’s just flowers, right? It flooded the field to the point where it reached her lower thighs. Then, she feels some… weird tingling sensation by her legs.
She looks at where this strange sensation came from only to see the flowers were starting to attach to her. Sayori’s eyes widened and she tried to instantly get them off but it was no use. She tried stomping the flowers off, shaking them off, anything, she even got desperate and tried to run but as she tried to run in the field of flowers she felt her legs glue together, making her fall face first into the swamp of flowers.
She couldn't breathe.
No matter how hard she tried, how much she gasped for air it wasn’t doing anything. The previous smell of lily she inhaled was now all she could taste and smell as she felt the flowers merge with her.
Then she wakes up.
She feels weird. Not the type of weird after a strange nightmare, but… almost as if something was wrong. Her eyes go to look at her hands, suddenly she sees flower markings drifting across one of her arms, her eyes widen and she gets up quickly, heading to a mirror.
She takes a good look at herself and sees a bunch of flowers going across her cheek and neck. Her arms shake helplessly as she brings a hand up, her hand grazes one of the markings on her cheek as she realizes what’s going on.
Sayori instantly tears up, she’s so fucking scared. She doesn’t know what’s happening, she just wanted her stupid crush to be reciprocated and now…
Was she really going to die?
She never thought it’d be this painful.
This… scary.
She turns on the faucet and tries to wash it away, scrubbing her skin as hard as she could but it's no use. She turns off the faucet and stares at herself, before finally letting herself cry.
She watches her face, taking in how pitiful she looked. The thought only makes her let out more choked sobs. While sobbing she notices something that made her stomach drop.
A small bud sticking out of her ear.
Sayori instantly rips it out, it was so damn painful and once she did blood spilled down her ear. She mutters a swear behind her breath quickly before wiping the blood off with a napkin. Then she starts coughing again with no warning. Sayori grabbed the edges of the sink and coughed forcibly.
Sayori was putting in all the effort she could muster, feeling the flowers squeeze out of her throat. Finally, she managed to cough out a few flowers. Fully blossomed lilies to be specific. She pants quickly staring at the flowers, they were so… beautiful.
As Sayori looks at the flowers, it makes her… calm down a bit. In her mind, she accepts her death already, she wanted to die anyway, right? This is just nature giving her what she wanted, in a way.
After a bit of contemplating, Sayori reaches her phone from her bag, she sees her friends dm’d her while she was busy.
“ Natsuki: Sayori??
Natsuki: Sayori answer me.
Natsuki: Sayori how did it go?
Natsuki: why are you not at school dummy
Natsuki: are you ok? Dumbass
Mc: hey i’m sorry about yesterday
Mc: Do you want to talk abt it or something?
Yuri: Are you okay?
Monika: Heyy Sayori, I know I don’t usually text you but Natsuki brought to my attention that you may not be feeling well, please let me know if something’s wrong, okay? I can’t have something bad happen to my favorite vice president ♡ “
Sayori saw all these notifications and felt a bit overwhelmed. She hesitantly clicks on Natsuki’s notification, she texted first after all..
“ He doesn’t like me, but it’s okay “
“ I’m okay. “
She sends both messages before clicking on Monika’s
“ Dw I’m okay it’s nothing just wasn’t feeling very well today so I skipped school hehe >:3 “
She sends to Monika before clicking on Yuri notification
“ Yep!! ^^ “
She sent before hesitantly clicking on the MC’s notification, in the middle of her typing she coughed a singular flower that landed on her phone. She quickly wiped it away before continuing
“ It’s fine, don’t worry “
She wrote with heavy fingers before pressing send, putting her phone on the ground and letting out a big exhale. However, this exhale only triggers more coughing. She coughs out a few flowers, half of them stained softly in blood. Sayori bent over, clutching the cold floor tiles as she wretched.
The sound, it was a mixture of gagging and painful sobs.
She watches the flowers hit the ground, instead of trying to clean it she just gets up, phone in hand and heads outside. Sayori runs, runs as far as her weak legs could take her, gasping for air each step she took.
She finally made it.
She made it to her favorite place, a park in the neighborhood. It was her favorite because she has many fond memories of the place. Sayori used to play with the MC almost everyday after school in this park. Sand castles, pushing each other on the swings, sliding down the slides, running around the park, tag, hide and seek, marco polo, monkey bars, so much more. It’s all memories she’ll never forget, even if she dies.
Sayori relaxes for a while, sitting at the bottom of the slide, her gaze travels to the blue skies, she remembers when she did picnics with the MC how they went cloud gazing some times, she remembers how she always felt butterflies in her stomach.
Sayori’s mind drifts into nostalgia, soon forgetting reality to fully indulge into the past.
Once Sayori came back to earth, she saw a singular, big, white lily on her lap, it almost made her feel as if she was still day dreaming. Instead of feeling panicked she smiled warmly, it was so pretty.
Sayori softly hums a song to herself, her thoughts not only now going to the past in the park but now it goes to all the time she ever spent with him. Like that time in elementary school where Sayori kept getting in trouble and the MC always got in trouble instead, or how they always used to binge watch movies and cartoons together while eating a tub of cookie dough ice cream.
She remembered watching Barney & Friends with the MC everyday after school in second grade. Sayori remembers vividly how whenever the song “I love you” started playing, she always got so excited as a kid. Sayori softly hums the tune of the song, her thumb brushing over one of the floral petals as she did so.
However, soon enough it was almost sunset, that meant the MC would probably be heading back home soon so she should go before he sees her. Sayori… wasn’t in the mood for interaction.
As Sayori enters her house, she feels a slight sense of dread but relief at the same time. She’s so used to being home. It always makes her feel better when she’s bad, but at the same time when she feels bad she’s always at home.
Staying home always made it even worse for Sayori because she knows deep down
No matter how long she stays home
No matter how long she tries to hide and cower in her damn house
It will never fix her problems.
It will never fix her.
Yet… she doesn’t know how to stop.
She lays on her wrinkly and messy bed looking at the ceiling, all the warmth and joy she felt outside dissipated completely. She rolls to her side, maybe she should sleep, forget about it all already.
And that’s exactly what she ended up doing. She fell asleep.
The next day Sayori wakes up, the light from outside illuminates her room from the window, she groans. She probably overslept again, not that she cared. She planned on spending her last days in her cave.
Sayori gets up and makes her way to her computer, it was 11am. She slept a lot, more than usual. Sayori heads downstairs and goes to the bathroom, she feels something moving around in her lungs. Once in the bathroom, Sayori instantly grabs the sink’s counter and looks into the mirror.
She saw the same bud as yesterday protruding from her ear, a white lily, she could faintly see the branch-like stick that connected the flower to the insides of her ears. Instead of ripping it out like yesterday Sayori lets it be there, it doesn’t matter anymore, she doesn’t fucking care if she’s covered in flowers or what. She’ll die either way.
Sayori examines herself more in the mirror. She saw even more flower marks staining her skin, it almost looked like a tattoo, it was weird. Just as she was about to examine more she felt the weird feeling in her lungs return, as if something was trying to claw its way out. She tried to cough to get it out but it made it worse, triggering her gag reflex.
Suddenly vomits it all out, coughing out buds, small flowers, big flowers, petals, blood, everything.
So many damn flowers.
Too much blood.
She doesn’t try to catch her breath and stares at the flowers before looking back at herself, her eyes had dark circles under them and she looked so pale. Sayori has never seen herself look this sick.
After coughing as much as her heart desired, she heads to the living room and picks up her phone from her backpack and heads to her couch. Her phone was flooded with notifications.
All of them from her concerned friends.
She hesitantly responds to each message, each text that was sent to her was filled with worry. Sayori today didn’t have much energy to put in a lot of effort in each text, so she gave rather simple responses to each of them, which probably only made them more worried because Sayori usually texts super energetically.
Once she finishes she lays on her sofa. Sayori then opens her gallery, scrolling through each photo, remembering the moment she took it and how she felt. Remembering that it will never be the same as it used to be.
One singular tear fell down her cheek as she kept browsing the photos. Right now, Sayori wished more than anything that she could just go in the past one time, maybe to elementary school? Sayori remembers how in elementary school she never felt so awful, she was so carefree and cheerful.
Sayori quickly sat up, the urge was coming back. She gripped her sofa’s cushions tightly as she let out one singular but strong cough. She felt a tidal wave of flowers fall onto her lap. She stares at her lap blankly.
She really was going to die, huh?
Definitely, at this rate..
Not like she cared anymore.
She stares at her lap as she contemplates, if her condition was getting worse this fast that meant…
She gets up quickly, flowers fall onto the carpeted floor as she heads back to her room and googles the stages of hanahaki disease again. Her eyes glance frantically across the page. No matter how many times she reread the page the answer didn’t change.
She was in the fifth stage according to the web,
That was the stage right before death.
It's been around six days and if she's already at the fifth stage does that mean..
Sayori’s scared to die.
She wants to die so why is she so scared of it right when she’s on death's door?
Fuck, she was just so tired of all this shit. All the restless nights thinking, crying, wondering why she couldn’t fucking be normal. Sayori gets up coughing out flowers that fell to the floor tiles.
She was going to try to end it all.
Sayori decided, if she’s going to die, she’s not going to let herself die of some illness. No, she wants to be the one to end her life. After all, she had already made plans, rehearsed it over and over again, she just never carried them out.
She heads to her nightstand in her room, opening the drawer and pulling out one long line of rope already tied into a neat noose.
She sat down for a bit, staring at it blanky as a few desperate tears fell down her cheeks. She wondered if she died would anyone care? Would they remember her?
They’d probably replace her.
She thought, sighing before getting up, attaching the noose to her ceiling carefully, making sure that it wouldn't snap off or break if she tried to hang herself on it.
She stood by the noose, looking up at it, tears flooded her vision, nearly falling but she quickly wiped them away, coughing softly as a few small lilies fell onto the ground.
“Shut up.. Shut up.. Mmmgh just fucking die already..”
She whispered to herself sobbing softly
“You’re such a useless burden.. Stupid stupid- rgh”
She sniffled clutching her head softly before snapping out of it
“Damn it all..”
She mumbled, thinking to herself maybe it’ll be better in the next life?
Slowly, with shaky ankles Sayori sat up on her bed, her arms trembling towards the noose before she grabbed it and slipped it onto her neck and tightening it.
This all felt like some stupid joke.
She couldn’t believe this is how it was going to end.
Would somebody even find her?
Would anyone even care to look?
She asked herself. Slowly she took a deep breath before pushing herself off the bed.
Shwwwosh
The rope creaked under her weight, she gasped at the feeling of the noose around her neck, it felt so tight and itchy.
She coughed helplessly, reaching for the noose with shaky hands, her legs flailing like a fish out of water. She could feel herself losing breath. She struggled for a minute or so but eventually she got tired, she looked at her room one last time, before her eyes glanced back at the floor, her vision darkening
Her hands fell to her side, her neck starting to snap. She took one last weak breath, the air rasping through her throat before it got stuck.
Slowly the rope’s swaying stopped and stayed still, supporting the weight of Sayori’s corpse that was now dangling from it.
Meanwhile, Monika, Yuri, Natsuki and Mc were all at school, probably eating lunch by now, completely oblivious to the fact that Sayori just killed herself.
Time passed by, the day and night cycle repeated for days and days, Sayori’s absences grew, unread text messages continued to be sent, friends worrying on why she just suddenly stopped responding and attending anything at all, as if she just suddenly… died.
One day, Mc had enough, it had been a good 4-5 days without any signal of Sayori’s existence and he was tired of spending the whole day worrying, he kept thinking about the worst case scenarios, what if she died? What if she got kidnapped? What if she moved away and hates me? God it’s all my fault.
After school he didn’t attend the club, instead, he stormed to her house, he needed answers. Once he arrived at her front door he banged on it, loud to make sure that she could hear even if she was in her room.
“Sayori… open up dammit!”
He tried the door, it was locked. He rested his forehead against the door, thinking of a way he could get inside.
He had spare keys
Spare keys from years ago, when they used to visit each other on a regular basis. He jogged to his house, entering his room and checking each drawer thoroughly.
Finally, he found his spare keys to her house in one of his cabinets. It was a bit rusty from being neglected for so long. An old keychain that he and Sayori matched with was attached onto the keys. He remembered he won it at the arcade for the two of them.
He remembered when he won them, how happy Sayori was. She smiled widely, giggled, hugged him. He faintly remembered the smell of her shampoo when she hugged him, her red bow booping against his right cheek.
…
He snapped out of it, grabbing the keys and running over to her place, unlocking the door and stepping inside.
Sayori.!?.. Sayori!!! God dammit where the hell are you!!
He walked around her living room, checking the bathrooms and kitchens, couches and tables. He didn’t see anything that alarmed him, but he noticed a crazy amount of flowers and petals on the ground and furniture, it intrigued him. He wondered why she decorated like this. Hm.
After searching the first floor, he decides to head up, after climbing the stairs he froze in his tracks.
His nostrils got hit with an awful cloying smell filling his nose. He instinctively covered his nose and mouth, coughing heavily. God he never smelled something so sickening in his life.
He hesitantly swallowed the nausea, taking slow steps forward, the smell got stronger and stronger the closer he went.
He stepped in front of Sayori’s door, taking a shaky breath. The only thing he could describe it as it a nauseating blend of rotting meat, feces, and garbage, mixed in with a sharp, sickly sweet undertone
“S-...Sayori..”
He muttered through a weak inhale, stepping closer to her room where the smell got stronger.
His hands rose to the doorknob.
He gently opened the door.
Mc froze in place, his hands falling to his side, the horrible rotting smell was completely forgotten as he just stared at the sight in front of him in pure, raw horror.
“S-.S.. Sayori..”
Was all he could bring himself to mumble out. He stared at her corpse. It was rotting, the skin on her neck and hands peeled off while the skin that remained had taken a more green/blue-ish hue.
Tears fell down his face as he choked on sobs.
“O-Oh my god… Sayori.. Sayoriii…
He sniffled, his knees giving out as he fell to the ground, staring at her lifeless body until the sun set. Finally, he got up, taking slow uneven breaths, trying to process what he just saw. His best friend killed herself… Was it all his fault? That was all he could think of right now. He didn’t dare step in her room, but he quietly looked around, noticing all the flowers and blood, on the floor and bed.
“Sayori…”
He repeated, covering his face as he wept
“I’m sorry… sayori please… why..?”
He clenched his eyes before he finally built up the courage to walk out of her house with weak legs. He locked the door behind him, slowly walking to his house, his eyes wide as if he was still trying to process everything.
Mc didn’t attend school for a week after that, he had gotten a shit ton of texts and they even tried to see him in his house but he just locked himself in his room for the whole week, trying to convince himself it wasn’t real, thinking about everything over and over again, what he could have done differently, all those times Sayori looked depressed and he just brushed it off when she said she was tired, thinking she didn’t sleep enough.
It was Friday, rain poured, Mc had finally built the strength to head to school, he had to tell Monika and the others about what happened.
During classes Mc was out of it the whole day, he wasn’t paying attention to the teachers and he had plenty of his classmates asking him what happened and why he looked like such a mess. He ignored them all.
After class, he headed to the club. He was the latest one because he had to take time in the bathroom to compose himself, reciting what he could say without breaking into tears.
He headed to the clubroom and stepped in. All three girls instantly surrounded him, they looked so worried, asking him what happened all at the same time.
He didn’t answer immediately. Just quietly sat down on a chair.
“S-Sayori.. Killed herself.”
He muttered quietly, clenching his eyebrows as he held back tears.
The room fell silent. Natsuki spoke up first after a few minutes.
“N-No.. w-what..?! What time of sick fucking joke is this!?!? I’ll kill you!!”
She backed up, tearing up.
Monika quickly hugged her, she could tell Natsuki was about to lose it.
“S-Shhh.. Natsuki… please.. It won’t fix anything”
She whispered shakily, Monika had a habit of always making sure others were okay even if she wasn’t.
Natsuki sobbed, hugging her as she nuzzled her chest in despair, wailing.
Meanwhile Yuri was frozen in place, she was staring at the wall with blank wide eyes, thinking to herself quietly.
“I-I’m sorry…”
He muttered weakly, taking the blame for her suicide. Monika tilted her head and looked at him.
“I-It’s not your fault..-”
“It is, it is, it is!!”
Natsuki yelled, clenching her eyes shut and turning her head away
“If only you told her you loved her!! Maybe she wouldn’t have fucking died!!”
She sobbed, Monika rubbed her head, trying to calm her down and not elevate the situation. However Natsuki cut her off and continued
“Why!!? Why didn’t you say that you love her!! You monster!! You-”
“N-Natsuki.. Please.. Stop..”
Yuri's voice cracked softly, as she whimpered, covering her eyes.
“Sayoris n-not going to-to come ba-back.. S-so-so- stop saying those horrible things… p-please..”
She sniffles, Natsuki opens her eyes, looking at Yuri and seeing her cry softly. It reminded her a bit of herself when her dad would yell and beat her, always yelling and no matter how much she begged to stop he didn’t. She didn’t want to be a monster like him. She sniffled softly, looking at the floor, her grip around Monika tightening
“I-I’m.. Sorry.”
She muttered weakly, burying her face in Monika’s shoulder
The four of them spent the rest of the day in the clubroom, mourning the loss of their friend Sayori. Natsuki finally came out and said that Sayori had the Hanahaki disease, they conversed on maybe that was why she killed herself? Yuri spoke up shortly after, saying that even if it was the reason she’s gone either way so it doesn’t matter if we speculate.
After that day Mc had called the police and they cleared up the body and confirmed to her that she had killed herself. Once the officer left, Mc's face softened, he looked around her house one time by himself. The police force cleaned away all the petals and signs of her, they left her stuff for him and his friends to pick up after but she was gone now.
He walked by the living room, then the kitchen, bathroom and then went to her room. He remembered in each room memories of them hanging out together, he missed her so much.
That weekend, Mc, Yuri, Monika and Natsuki spent the weekend at Sayori’s house, the four of them recollected her belongings and gathered on the sofa, reminiscing on memories of their dear friend Sayori, promising each other that they will never forget her.