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Sa mga panahong ito, hindi masyadong maraming tao sa cafe na kadalasang puntahan ng mga kolehiyong estudyante sa campus. Dahil either silang nababaliw, o naglalakwatsya sa kung saan man. Sa karamihan, natapos na nila ang kanilang mga exam, ngunit sa mga di-swerte, hell week talaga.
Sa isang lamesa malapit sa malalaking bintana, si Snowbird ay masigasig na nagsusulat, kanyang mga notes nakakalat, laptop niya nakabukas rin. Ito ay dahil kasama siya sa i-ilan na estudyante na naloloka na sa pag-aaral. Di pa kasi tapos yung finals week niya, kaya tuloy nagkaka-tama.
Nakaupo sa kanyang tapat, si Flux, nagmumuni-muni, hawak-hawak ang kanyang chocolate frappe. Siya naman ay isa sa mga estudanteng malaya na, nag-e-enjoy ng kanilang break. Ngunit, kung tatanungin mo si Flux, di talaga siya makapag-enjoy dahil sa bagong drama sa buhay niya.
Tatlong beses. Ganoong karaming beses na tumanggi si Thomas na gumala. Kahit nga isang beses lang suspicious na eh, pero tatlo? Tatlo!?
Minsan nga, bigla nalang siyang mangiiwan, biglang kumaripas ng takbo pagkatapos magsabi ng kung anu-ano. Bigla nalang siyang malulutang, tapos before you know it, wala na siya. Ish-knows-where yung punta niya.
Pero, parang alam na nagaalala si Flux, biglang nagsasabi na 'okay lang ang lahat' si Thomas. Obviously, di siya okay, kung ganyan yung ugali niya sa kasalukuyan.
"So, let me get this straight." Sabi ni Snowbird, huminga ng malalim pagkatapos bitawan yung ballpen na kanyang hawak sa kahoy na mesa, "Jowa mo, nang-ghost sa date niyo. Ok. So naisipan mo na tawagin ang mahal-na-mahal mong kaibigan na si Snowbird, sa kalagitnaan ng finals week, para lang mag vent, instead na mag-usap kayo. Like normal people."
Malakas na sumipsip si Flux sa kanyang inumin, "Di ko boyfriend si Thomas."
"Wala akong sinasabi na pangalan, by the way." Tumingin si Snowbird sa kanya with a deadpan expression. "Di ba available yung iba?"
Ang tinutukoy ni Snowbird ay ang friend group na tinatawag na 'The Conspiracy' na dati pang kaibigan ni Flux galing highschool. Kahit graduate na, palagi naman silang nagkikita dahil yung iba, nag-aaral sa parehas na kolehiyo, yung iba, malapit lang nag-aaral. Si Snowbird ang isa sa mga kaparehas ni Flux, kahit na hindi magkatulad ang course nila. Si Snowbird nasa communications, si Thomas nasa engineering, at huli, si Flux, nag-aaral ng architecture.
"Ikaw lang kasi yung cheap lang singil. The others kasi nanghihingi ng 200 pesos para lang to go out. Mga pagmumukha nila, do they think I have infinite money?"
"Mayaman ka naman eh. Dapat ata tinaasan ko rin yung akin." Snowbird slumps in his seat, regretting this already, "Ano ba yung gusto mong gawin?"
"Do you know where Thomas is at lately?"
Biglang nagpause si Snowbird, natutulala nang onti, "…Di ko alam kung nasan siya pumupunta."
Suspicious.
"Pramise!" Tinaas ni Snowbird ang kanyang dalawang kamay as a sign of peace.
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Biglang malakas na tumunog ang celpon ni Snowbird, rinig na rinig ang dami ng kanyang notifications. Ito ay kanyang binuksan, at nagalit sa kanyang nakita.
Tingin naman ni Flux na di siya nagsisinungalin, pero di rin niya sinasabi ang buong katotohanan.
"So, di mo talaga know kung where si Thomas?" Sinabi ni Flux ng mabagal.
"Yep, walang-wala talaga." Sagot ni Snowbird, distracted.
"Do you think, kaya mo siyang i-stalk in secret?" Tanong ni Flux, umiling nalang si Snowbird dito, eyes still glued sa phone niya.
Oo nga pala. Finals niya.
Sinubukang sumilip si Flux sa celpon ni Snowbird, pero ito ay kanyang tinatago.
"What's that about? Is it that importante to distract you from the conversation? One that I made bayad for, mind you."
"Sori, sori, group ko kasi, nakakabwiset. Finals na finals, pabigat pa. Prof kasi na yan eh, nagbigay pa group project." Snowbird rolled his eyes, "Whatever, kaya ko namang mag-multitask. Probably. Basta sabihin mo nalang gusto mong sabihin."
"Ugh, I get it." Biglang naalala ni Flux yung huli niyang semester. Madugo. "Anyway, Thomas has been declining my offers para gumala lately. He always seem to be distracted by… something, I guess."
"Yeah, napansin rin namin. Laging nalulutang yun." Snowbird scratches his head, still typing sa celpon niya.
"Right. Do you have any idea what's his iniisip?" Na para bang detectib, kailangan ni Flux malaman lahat ng kayang makuha niya.
"Err…" Biglang lumipat ng trabaho si Snowbird sa laptop, typing parin sa kung anong ginagawa niya, "Parang off siya nung kumain tayo ng lunch that one time."
Sinubukan ni Flux kung kaya niyang maalala kung anong pinagsasabi ni Snowbird. Pero wala talaga.
"Lunch?" Tanong ni Flux.
"Yeah, he was talking about si ano…" Snowbird trails off, "Basta, yun nangyari."
Sino?
Inisip ni Flux ng lahat na nangyari so far.
Biglang palaging busy si Thomas. Thomas na bigla nalang tumatakbo kung saan, na parang may nakitang multo.
Pero what if, ang nakita niya ay di multo, pero tao?
Uminom muli si Flux ng kanyang frappe bago siya nagsalita ulit.
"So, you don't know where he is." Flux repeats his point, "But, do you know who is he with?"
"Oh, probably kasama niya si Saps."
Jackpot.
"Saps?" Sigaw ni Flux, "Why would he be hanging out with that loser?"
Saps. Saparata. Finally, may lead na siya kung saan pumupunta si Thomas at ang nakuha niyang pangalan ay isang pabidang palaka na attat na attat kay Thomas sa mga nakalipas na buwan.
Desperado. Yun ang isang salita na bagay sa kanya. Palaging nakakahighblood. Super nakakainis.
Guilty na guilty ang itsura ni Snowbird pagkatapos niyang ibuking ang katotohanan. Tumigil na siyang magtrabaho sa kung anong pinagagawa niya.
"Snowbird." Flux glares at him, "Tell me."
Mabilis na umiling si Snowbird, nagpapanik. "Yoko, yoko, may blackmail yan sakin."
"Sino? Saps?" Flux raises his eyebrow, scoffing, "I can give a better blackmail than what he has on you."
Biglang bukas naman si Snowbird ng bibig, pero ito ay kanyang tinakpan agad ng kanyang kamay, umiiwas ng tingin. May tinatago talaga.
Di ba si Saps yung nagblackmail sa kanya?
"Spit it out. Now." Walang pake si Flux sa blackmail na yan. Bat ba kasama ni Thomas si Saps?
Nagmamadaling siniksik ni Snowbird ang kanyang gamit sa loob ng backpack niya, bilis ng takbo papunta sa labas ng cafe. "Bye, Flux! Sa susunod, promise!"
Tiningnan nalang ni Flux na tumakbo si Snowbird sa labas ng bintana.
Bam!
Nadapa pa.
"How unusual." Sabi ni Flux, kagat-kagat sa straw.
"Sorry talaga, nabusy ako lately." Ang sabi ni Thomas, habang palakad sa susunod nilang klase.
Flux only crosses his arms in response. Tatlong araw nang nakalipas nung nalaman niya na may tinatago palang nagsisimula with an S si Thomas, busy na busy kasi may kinikita palang iba.
Natapos na ang kanilang maikling break, balik nanaman sa mga boring na klase at hinding natatapos na org work.
"Wag ka nang magalit, please?" Dahan-dahan na hinawakan ni Thomas ang braso ni Flux. Ang kanyang mga kamay ay magaspang galing sa engineering na trabaho, kanyang palad kayang palibutan ang bisig ni Flux, sa laki nito.
I heard you were hanging out with Saps.
You were hanging out with someone else instead of me.
Kinagat ni Flux ang kanyang dila, pinipigilang lumabas ang salitang kanyang iniisip. It's not time yet. "Make it up to me this Saturday. Movie night tayo."
Kinailangang umiling si Flux sa kinang ng ngiti ni Thomas. Katulad isang daang araw, parang nakakabulag na liwanag.
"Lulutuin ko yung favorite mong popcorn." Masayang sinabi ni Thomas.
Isang bagay tungkol kay Thomas ay magaling siyang magluto. Kaya, sa apartment na kanilang tinitirhan, palagi siya ang in-charge sa mga kakainin. Lalo na sa caramel popcorn, tamang tama lang ang tamis at alat sa kanyang pagkakaluto. Kahit na tinuruan na niya si Flux kung paano gumawa, ito ay palagi niyang nasusunog o napapasobra ng lasa. Parang magic, ito ay naayos rin ni Thomas sa dulo.
"Sige." Sabi ni Flux, "About the movie—"
Ngunit, bagong matapos ni Flux ang kanyang sasabihin, sa likod nila, may pamilyar na boses na sumigaw. Umikot si Flux para makita kung sino man ito, pero dapat di nalang ata niya yun ginawa, kasi may pangit na daga, nangngangalang Saps ang bumati sa kanya.
"Hi." Imik ni Saps, hinihingal, "Funny seeing you guys here, huh? Nandito pala kayo." Walang nakakatawang makita ang mukhang sisira ng kanyang araw, lalo na yung mukhang iyon ay ngumingiti ng malaki, kanyang kayumangging mata at dalawang nunal natatago sa kanyang pisngi.
Parang nakakasuka. Palaging sumasakit ang dibdib at sikmura ni Flux sa presensya ng ipis na to.
Kinuha ni Flux ang braso ni Thomas, ready nang umalis at tumakas. Ngunit, tulala nanaman si Thomas.
"Saps." Tango ni Thomas.
Weird. Usually, natingin lang si Thomas, parang galit pa, at inuunahang hilain si Flux paalis kay Saps.
Anong pinagbago?
"Thomas." Sabi ni Saps. Di nagugustuhan ni Flux ang paraan ng pagtingin niya kay Thomas.
Hinigpitan ni Flux ang hawak niya sa braso ni Thomas.
Tumingin nanaman si Saps kay Flux, nakangiti parin in a way na nakakakilabot ng buong katawan at nakakahina ng binti.
"Bad mood ka ba today, babycakes?" Tawa ni Saps.
Hindi na talaga niya papansinin ang weirdong ito, "Come on, Thomas, we gotta go."
"Aww, may klase ka na ba? Kala ko vacant mo."
Tama si Saps, pero di niya yun aaminin. Plano ni Flux sa umpisa na mauna sa room bago pumasok yung prof. Para nun, makakain pa o makaupo lang, para makatambay habang maraming tao sa canteen, mga estudyanteng di pa kumakain ng almusal.
"What do you know about our schedules?" Flux's eyes narrow in suspicion. "Stalker ka ba?"
Kung tama ang naalala ni Flux, may klase si Saps sa oras na ito. Dati, magkaklase sila roon, and for non-related Saps reasons, dinrop niya yung class. Doon nagsimula ang pag-aasar at pangungutya.
Jusko, ayaw na niyang alahanin pa bago siya mas lalong mainis.
When you're a freshman, always choose your seatmates wisely. He should've followed the advice better.
So, back to the topic, stalker na nga, nagskskip pa ng class para lang mangstalk. Ibang level na talaga to ng kupal. Eugh.
"No?" Sabi ni Saps, parang di pa siya sure sumagot. Bigla nanaman siyang ngumiti, "Ang kyut mo talaga kapag naiinis ka."
Tumingin si Flux kay Thomas, ready na makita siyang magalit or something sa kung anu-anong pinagsasabi ng taeing ito. But for some reason, today, Thomas looks as if meron siyang hinahanap na reaction.
No help then, Binalik ni Flux ang tingin niya kay Saps.
"Di ako cute." Flux glares harder, "Or maybe your senses have dulled seeing yourself in the mirror a little too much."
"Ouch." Dramatic na nagpangap si Saps, parang nasaksak talaga sa puso. Nang tumingin muli, siya'y kumindap, at ngumiti ulit, ang kanyang mala-puting buhok ay kumikislap sa ilalim ng liwanag.
"Sakit naman nun." Ang kanyang tsokolateng mata ay parang kumikinang, medyo natatatago ng mahaba niyang pilik-mata, "Can you kiss it better, please?"
Mas lalong nasusuka si Flux. Sinong gustong humalik sa pangit na yan?
Nang sumilip si Flux in the corner of his eye, somehow si Flux na ang tinitingnan ni Thomas, naghihintay ng sagot niya.
Anong meron sa kanya?
"I'd rather not." Flux says with a deadpan expression, umikot para mawala na si Saps sa paningin. "Bye."
Hinila ni Flux si Thomas, napagtantong na di pa siya bumibitaw mula pa kanina. It doesn't matter. Kailangan na nilang umalis, now, away from this creep. Kinayanan nilang maglakad ng atleast tatlong hakbang bago nagsalita siya muli.
"Pano naman ikaw, Thomas? Wala akong kiss goodbye?" Pa-simple pang sinabi ni Saps. It was one thing na inuuto niya si Flux, pero si Thomas?
Yung Thomas na palihim na nakikipagkita kay Saps, na hindi pinapa-alam kay Flux?
Higpitan ni Flux ang hawak niya kay Thomas, bago niya'y itong binitawan, naglakad, at lumapit kay Saps.
"Back off from Thomas, I'm warning you." Bulong ni Flux, glaring at directly into Saps' eyes.
"At anong gagawin mo about it?" Saps steps closer, parang walang sense of personal space.
A breathe away from Saps' long lashes, bumulong muli si Flux, "You'll see."
Umikot muli si Flux, pabalik kay Thomas. Hindi na niya pinansin ang mahinang tawang kanyang narinig galing kay Saps.
Hinila ni Flux muli si Thomas sa kanyang pulso, paalis, patakas, papunta sa susunod nilang klase.
"Huh." Sabi ni Thomas, na parang may narealize sa kanyang pag-oobserba.
Binuksan ni Flux ang pinto sa susunod nilang klase ng malakas. Maraming estudyante na ang nasa loob, kaya'y hinila niya si Thomas sa mga bakanteng upuan sa gitna ng silid.
May mga weirdong nakatitig sa kanila, sarap sundutin ng mata. Binitawan ni Flux ang kanyang hawak kay Thomas pagkaupo nila.
"Day absolutely ruined." Flux huffs, "Thomas, we need to stay away from that place for at least a week."
Tumititig lamang si Thomas sa kanyang pulso, na hawak-hawak ni Flux kanina lamang.
"Thomas." Flux calls out, and finally, Thomas is jolted back to reality.
"Sige, we should." Sabi ni Thomas, still natutulala.
Flux mentally notes of another of his strange behaviors, bago niya nilabas ang kanyang celpon para magdoomscroll.
Brainrot. After brainrot. After—
Nakakainis. Di niya talaga matanggal sa isip niya yung nangyari kanina.
Flux opens his contact list, unblocking a number na he wishes he deleted a long time ago.
[ SAPARATA ]
what do you want from Thomas? <
im not kidding when i say you should back off <
> Nonya
? <
> Nonya business
> LMAOOOO
Muntik na.
Napigilan ni Flux ang sarili niya na i-bato ang kanyang celpon sa isang random na estudyante. Nakakadistract talaga, at hindi na niya kailangan ng isa pang headache sa buhay niya. Binlock niya muli si Saps, for the sake of a peaceful life.
Lock in. He has a class to focus on.
Dumating ang Sabado, at tinupad naman ni Thomas ang kanyang pangakong magluto ng popcorn for movie night.
Silang dalawa ay nakaupo sa kanilang sofa, sa apartment nila, naghahanap ng maayos na mapapanood.
"Thomas, any suggestions?" Sabi ni Flux, ulo nasa balikat ni Thomas.
"Hm, di ako makapili eh. Just pick a random one." Huni ni Thomas, hawak ang celpon sa isang kamay, kabilang braso nakalibot kay Flux, holding him close.
Flux presses the remote, scrolling through various movies on the list. Gusto niya ng something predictable, but not too predictable. Judging a book by it's cover has always been his specialty, so kaya pumili siya na may typical generic poster.
Pagkatingin niya kay Thomas, gumagamit parin siya ng celpon.
"Thomas, nagsisimula na the movie. Stop using your phone." Paalala ni Flux.
"Right, sorry." Thomas says, placing his phone on the edge of the couch. He glances at it one last time, before letting go.
Nagsimula ang movie with a nice suburban na bahay, a family of five, living quietly until one day, their peace gets disrupted with a threatening note — one that tells them na lahat sila mamatay by the end of the day.
"Typical. Any bets on the final survivor?" Flux looks up at Thomas, who's once again, glancing anxiously at his phone.
Umiling si Thomas, at niya'y binalik ang kanyang tingin sa TV.
"Bet ko yang nanay yan." Sagot ni Thomas, taking a handful of popcorn.
"Nah, she's definitely the killer. I wouldn't blame her, ako'y mababaliw with brats like those."
Eventually, naubos yung popcorn.
"Luto pa ako ng bago, teka lang." Sabi ni Thomas, tumayo papuntang kusina.
"'kay." Sagot ni Flux, pausing the movie.
Mga dalawang minuto pagkatapos na pumunta si Thomas sa kusina nang tumunog ang kanyang celpon with two new notifications.
Yan siguro yung hinihintay ni Thomas, kaya siyang nababahala at di makafocus sa movie.
…Well. Wala naman si Thomas here right?
Nang binuksan ni Flux ang celpon, siya'y binati ng picture niya kasama ni Thomas. Flux is caught a bit off guard, kasi dalawang taon na iyong picture, yung araw na itong kinuha, alalang-alala pa niya. Nakangiti siya ng kaunti sa litrato, kaya nagbiro si Thomas na gagawin niyang lockscreen ito.
Umiling si Flux, now is not the time to be nostalgic. Focus sa dalawang text messages sa notification bar, right.
Galing kay Saps yung mga text. Pangalan niya may white heart pa sa dulo.
What have you been getting into, Thomas?
Flux finally reads the messages.
He then turns off the phone, balik ang tingin sa the blank screen of the television. A few moments pass, at nakabalik na si Thomas with a bowl of popcorn
"You okay?" Tanong ni Thomas.
Pinilit ni Flux na di tumingin sa celpon na kanyang binuksan ngayon-ngayon lang.
"Yeah. I'm fine."
"Sure ka?" Sabi ni Thomas, umupo sa tabi niya, "Alam mo I'm always here to listen, right?"
Of course, Thomas will always listen to his worries. Palagi naman. He's always there to lend an ear to his troubles. Sometimes, even a shoulder to lean on. Pero, this issue isn't something na gustong pagusapan ni Flux at all.
"Kaya kong i-handle it by myself." Sabi ni Flux, binalik ang kanyang tingin sa screen. Namatay na yung TV sa tagal ng hintay. Flux turns it back on, unpausing the scene.
Thomas shrugs, "Sabi mo."
Hindi makafocus si Flux sa movie. At one point, may horrible plot twist yung movie, ngunit, dahil madami siyang iniisip, wala siyang comment. Hindi niya itong tipikal na ugali, at alam din iyon ni Thomas.
Ngunit, walang sinabi si Thomas, pinapabayaan lang siyang malutang. Baka sa tingin niya na kaya ni Flux humingi ng tulong, overestimating na kaya niya. Baka kasi si Thomas lang ang pinagkakatiwalaan niyang sabihan ng lahat, kaya alam niya na sasabihin kung anong nasa isip niya kapag dumating na ang tamang panahin.
Natapos na yung movie. Naging final survivor nga yung nanay, pinalo yung killer gamit ng walis paalis ng bahay nila.
Flux yawns. He makes sure na rinig na rinig ito ni Thomas.
"Sleepy na ako. I'm going to bed." Flux announces.
Maagang matutulog for the first time, yeah, like that isn't suspicious.
"Goodnight, Flux, sleep well." Boses ni Thomas humina ng paunti-unti habang naglakad si Flux papunta sa kwarto niya.
Nabangungot si Flux noong gabing iyon. Dalawang notifications, alalang-alala kung anong nasa loob.
— I wasnt using you to get to him, Thomas.
— Seryoso. Gusto rin kita.
Nagconfess na talaga si Saps. With the way that Saps said 'kita', it looks like na reciprocated yung feelings rin niya. Baka nga, sila na.
Nanliligaw pala si Saps, yung nakakairita niyang paghabol kay Thomas sa nakalipas na buwan, nagtapos sa tagumpay. Nadamay lang si Flux sa gitna nito, thinking nothing of it.
Masayang masaya siguro si Thomas ngayong gabi, hindi katulad ni Flux, di makatulog ng maayos. Maligayang binabasa ang mensahe galing sa bagong boyfriend niya.
Bagong boyfriend.
For some reason, Flux just couldn't feel happy for his best friend.
He ignores the aching feeling in his chest, at siya'y pumikit, umaasa na mahimbing na siyang makatulog, di na mabangugot muli.
It got worse.
Knowing Thomas' schedule and routine, well, routine na alam niya, without any surprise dates, madaling nahanap ni Flux si Thomas, nag-aaral na mag-isa sa library.
Well, clearly not by himself, kasi katabi niya, may humahagikgik na bubuyog, nangangalang Saps, na parang ba may nakakatawa sa pinaguusapan nila. Kilig na kilig si Saps kay Thomas, ang tinis ng boses, nakakabingi ng tenga.
Nagtatago sa likod ng isang bookshelf, inoobserbahan ni Flux ang dalawa, his fingers scratching off the wood varnish.
When will Thomas tell him about his new relationship?
Dalawang araw na ang nakalipas ever since nakita ni Flux yung message, and from what he's seeing, the two got cozy fast. Pinaglalaruan ni Thomas ang mahabang buhok ni Saps, nag-aaral daw ngunit di nakatingin sa libro, si Saps bulong ng bulong ng stuff na di marinig ni Flux, ngiting-ngiti naman si Thomas, using the smile that Thomas usually reserves for Flux alone.
This isn't the first time that Flux has seen him like that, he saw all of those stolen glances in the halls yesterday.
Kung dati, tumatakbo paalis si Thomas, ngayon, he just stands there, frozen, mesmerized.
It's sickeningly sweet.
Kung sinabi lamang ni Thomas na mahal niya si Saps, Flux wouldn't mind to put his hatred aside. Kahit na may mukhang masarap na sampalin si Saps, mas importante si Thomas kaysa sa away nila. Alam naman yun ni Thomas, with him reading Flux so easily.
…Does Thomas not trust him? Kaya ba lihim niyang tinatago sa bestfriend niya yung one of the biggest news in his life?
All of those secret rendezvous, glances, messages, hidden far away from Flux's gaze. Do they giggle, thinking they're keeping their little secret so well? Flux being the fool in the middle of it?
Back off Thomas, sabi niya. But what right does he have over Thomas? Hindi siya pagmamay ari ni Flux. May sarili siyang buhay at mga opinyon.
Flux just wishes he at the very least, knew about it.
Flux walks out of the library with a horrible, sinking feeling in his chest. Di niya alam kung saan siya pupunta, but basta, kinailangan na niyang umalis doon.
He couldn't stand the sight any longer. Thomas smiling as if Saps hung the stars, Saps staring at Thomas just the same.
He has never seen Saps so besotted like that.
But Thomas—
Thomas—
Flux stops in his tracks.
When in trouble, there has always been something that helped him as an artist, an architect.
What he needs to do is to go back to where he started.
Back to the drawing board.
Kanyang binuksan ang kanyang messaging app, typing three words.
[SNOWBIRD]
you owe me <
Balik sa cafe, sa parehas na mesa, na parang walang nangyari lang, umiinom si Flux ng kanyang chocolate frappe. Sinabi niya lahat ng nangyari kay Snowbird, this time, di na busy sa finals.
"So, dating pala si Thomas and Saps." Sabi ni Snowbird, ngumungyuya ng cinnamon roll, "Di ko yun na expect."
"Did you know?" Flux says, completely drained off his energy.
"Not really. Last time ko silang nakita, di naman sila lovey-dovey. Two weeks ago ata yun?" Snowbird swallows his food, "Matches up with the time na sinabi mo na nagdecline si Thomas gumala."
"You said something about a blackmail." Flux puts down his drink on the table, hiding his face with his hands, slouching, "It's Thomas, isn't it."
"Yup," Snowbird pops the p, "Sabi niya wag ko daw sabihin sayo."
"Why would he? That's the confusing part." Flux's mind couldn't provide a simple clue. Some detective he is, couldn't even predict such a thing happening.
"Di ko alam," Snowbird shrugs, "kala ko nga mauuna kayong mag-dadate ni Thomas."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Flux straightens his posture a little.
"May bet kami lahat dati. Ever since highschool pa." Snowbird takes another forkful of his pastry.
"Ano?" Flux says, confused.
Snowbird stops his fork midway, and puts it down.
"Flux, live-in partners kayo. You both share an apartment." Snowbird says outright.
"It was cheaper to buy that way, so we can split off the utilities!"
"You're both so touchy with each other."
"It's only natural, I'm his best friend!" Flux vehemently defends himself.
"Yeah, sure." Snowbird rolls his eyes. "Kung iba yung bestfriend mo, di mo yan sasabihin."
"If Saps was my best friend, I would do the same thing. Alam mo how much I hate the guy, so clearly, your points are invalid." Flux crosses his arms, proving a point.
"Uh-huh. Lots to unpack here." Snowbird nods, "Pag-isipan mo yan, ha."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
Snowbird only sighs in response.
"Flux, obviously, seloso ka. You're jealous." Snowbird says, "But, it's all good, kasi gusto mo rin si—"
"Jealous?" Flux huffs, "What would I need to be jealous of?"
Snowbird turns silent.
"Ano?" Tanong ni Flux.
"Flux. Gamitin mo nga yang utak mo! You're smarter than this!" Snowbird puts a hand over his head in frustration, "I can't believe you're this oblivious!"
Flux thinks back to all the clues he's gotten and all the things Snowbird claims.
May bet yung friendgroup nila na magkakatuluyan sila,
Their shared apartment,
The casual touches that linger,
The close contact that became habit,
The jealousy that he's apparently feeling when he sees the two,
It all points to one conclusion—
Flux likes Thomas.
Oh.
Oh.
…He's fucked.
"Flux, may ginawa ba akong mali?" Tanong ni Thomas, gently holding his wrist.
Tapos na yung klase, lahat ng mga estudyante nagmadali papunta sa susunod nilang schedule. Sa huli, si Flux at Thomas na lamang ang nanatili.
Apat na araw na ang nakalipas pagkatapos kausapin ni Flux si Snowbird.
Hindi naman sinadya ni Flux na iwasan si Thomas. At first, jealous siya, then narealize niya na in-love pala siya sa bestfriend niya. Di niya alam kung kailan itong nagsimula, ngunit too late na siya para umamin.
He's a mess, and he doesn't know where to start.
"Wala, you don't need to worry about it." Flux stares blankly at Thomas.
Gusto rin ba siya ni Thomas bago dumating si Saps? Gusto parin ba siya ni Thomas ngayon o nag move-on na siya kasi masyadong natangga si Flux sa sarili niyang damdamin?
"Flux." Thomas takes his hand on his, cradling it gently. "Please?"
Flux has always been weak to Thomas' pleading.
"We don't want to make your boyfriend to think of the wrong idea, no?" Flux withdraws his hands away from Thomas, despite wanting to stay in his touch.
"Boyfriend?" Thomas steps back, "Anong pinagsasabi mo?"
"I found out about Saps, Thomas." Flux says, "But clearly, I wasn't important enough to be informed of it."
"That's not—" Thomas steps closer, but Flux shies away. Hindi niya kayang tingnan si Thomas sa mata.
"That's not, what, exactly? Didn't you tell Snowbird not to tell me about you two?"
"I—"
"I wouldn't have opposed your relationship if you just had told me."
"But—"
"You didn't need to ditch me last minute, running off to your prince charming."
"Flux—"
"You don't need to say anything more, I'm going home."
"Flux, let me talk!" Hinawakan ni Thomas ang balikat ni Flux, finally forcing Flux to look at him. "It was because of you, okay?"
Huh?
Halata sigurong confused si Flux kasi sunod na nagclarify si Thomas.
"I approached Saps multiple times, and told him off for playing with your feelings. Two timing kasi, he keeps flirting with the two of us, at ayoko kong masaktan ka." Thomas gulps, "It just spiraled from there. Di ko alam kung panong sabihin na na-fall ang bestfriend mo sa crush mo, at nagkatuluyan pa sila."
Flux stares for quite some time, not knowing what to feel. His next words tumbles out of his mouth before he could think of anything else to say.
"What are you talking about, Thomas? What feelings?"
"…Huh? Feelings mo kay Saps, obviously." Sabi ni Thomas, binitawan ang hawak niya sa balikat ni Flux, stepping back a bit.
What?
"What?" Flux voices his thoughts out loud, "Sino ang may crush on Saps?"
Thomas blinks.
"Ikaw?" Thomas' answer came off more as a question.
"Ako?" Flux blinks in confusion. "I don't have a crush on Saps."
A beat.
"Flux, nung isang araw sinasabi mo sa groupchat na kailangan ni Saps uminom ng maraming tubig, kasi chapped yung labi niya. You sent at least ten messages about it that day alone." Thomas says with a deadpan expression, "That's kinda gay, man."
Flux splutters, repeating himself, "I don't have a crush on Saps!"
"Sure ka?" Thomas' lips quirk up to a smile, easing the tension, "I could think of more times where you kept describing his eyes or his moles. Palagi kang tumititig sa kanya, actually."
"That's because—" Flux stutters, "I'm insulting him at every opportunity!"
"Oh?" Thomas grins, "Then, why are you so red now?"
Flux covers his face with his hands, now realizing how warm it has gotten.
"I don't—" Flux's voice cracks, "I don't—" His voice becoming more and more quieter each syllable. He's trying to find more excuses, but to no avail.
He cannot like Saps. He simply just can't!
That would mean— that would mean—
"Uh-oh." Sabi ni Thomas. "I think I broke him."
Flux then hears a camera snap behind him, opposite of Thomas, and turns to see Saps, with the biggest grin in his face, hawak-hawak ang celpon niya.
Somehow, habang nag-uusap sila, Saps entered the room. The worse case scenario has come true.
Flux turns redder, feeling a bit faint. He looks at Thomas, na mukhang matatawa, and then back to Saps na tintry na itago ang hagikgik niya.
Flux clenches his fist in frustration, unable to utter a single word.
That's it.
Flux had enough of this. This humiliation — all of the whirlwind of mixed emotions Flux has been feeling for the past week or so.
So, what else could Flux do but tumakbo at sapakin si Saps sa mukha?
You couldn't blame him for it, and you can even say it was daserb.