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Saturn was going to snap as he stomped through tall grasses and leaves, Div and Pika trailing behind. He wanted to scream at Div the way he screamed at Soda and Nav. He wanted to tell him he was tired. Tired of being used and fighting and losing friends. Tired of Div.
He stopped suddenly and turned around, sucking in air to let everything out. And he froze the moment he laid eyes on Div’s.
He couldn’t say a thing. The same way he stayed passive after Orlix confronted Div and stayed compliant to all of his stupid requests. A faint thought echoed in his mind, the same one that appeared every time something involved Div. It told him Div was still his friend. His fists clenched, either at himself for being unable to say a thing or at Div for being, well, Div. Saturn couldn’t tell.
Cherry blossom leaves fluttered around them like butterflies, the sunset tinting them orange. The faded mountains were ethereal in the distance. Saturn regrettably hated it. How could everything be so beautiful when he was in so much turmoil? Pika stood behind Div’s shoulder with his mouth curved downward so slightly that Saturn couldn’t tell if he was imagining it.
“Nevermind,” he muttered before swiftly turning around to continue walking. He refused to think about Div’s annoyed face.
They finally arrived at Saturn’s home. The trio collectively agreed it was the best place to heal injuries. It was full of food(as Pika liked to joke) and away from everyone else. If Saturn were to continue being tired of the world, he’d rather be tired here.
While Saturn prepared for food and Pika searched for Saturn’s first aid kit, Div collapsed onto the chair and immediately started talking.
“Oh my gosh,” he said. “I can’t believe Twilight would spawn trap me. That’s so stupid!”
“What was it even for?” Pika asked as he approached Div.
“I don’t know. They got pissed because I apparently forced them to do a job they were paid for. Can you believe that? And then guess what? Someone commissioned them to imprison me.” Div let out a drastic hah! before suddenly wincing and bringing his hands to his leg.
“Div! Are you alright?” Pika asked, panicked. He leaned forward to inspect the leg. It was bleeding ferociously. The only thing slightly stopping the bleeding was Div’s pants that stuck tightly to the wound.
“Obviously not! I was literally limping on the way here,” Div hissed.
“Hey! Don’t talk to Pika like—”
“It’s okay Saturn,” Pika interrupted. “Div, remove your hands. I could treat it.”
Div complied. He yelped every few seconds. When Pika tried peeling the fabric off, when the antiseptic stung, when Pika was too rough when applying pressure and soon after the gauze. Pika’s brows furrowed and his mouth pursed. He was clearly frustrated towards himself—much to Saturn’s confusion because he was literally the one treating the injury—and worried. Div likely pulled the arrow out, inevitable due to the high speed chase, which caused the abundant bleeding.
Saturn finally arrived with baked potatoes and mushroom stew. They weren’t exquisite or nutritious foods that treated injuries quickly, but it was something. Plus, everyone will be too busy treating or clinging to wounds to fully dine. Simple was enough.
“Saturn,” Pika said, “How were your injuries? I know you were getting 2v1’d before I arrived.”
Saturn replied, “I’m fine. Didn’t you say you got popped by a bunch of wardens? I can treat you first.” He shoved a bowl of stew towards Pika. “Take your armor off.”
“No,” Pika said sternly. “I can treat you first. I’m used to fighting and injuries anyway. You aren’t.”
“No one is fine after fighting multiple wardens, Pika. Not even you. You’re just on your totem high.”
Saturn could tell it was wearing off, though. Even if the wounds were hidden behind armor and clothing, Saturn caught Pika’s trembling hands as he treated Div and the ways his eyes twitched every time he moved. His narrowed eyes told Pika he knew.
Pika glanced his eyes to the side before sighing. “Fine.” But he didn’t budge. After a moment of hesitation, he said,”Um, can you take it off for me? Carefully.”
Saturn raised a brow.
“Why?”
“...I think I broke a few ribs. Wait, actually, I know I broke them.”
“Are you kidding me?!” Saturn cringed at the volume. He didn’t mean to yell, especially when everyone needed a break. But still—“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“I told you. I could deal with it. Besides, totems and gaps already heal injuries.”
“Only temporarily!”
“Can you guys stop fighting?” Div intervened. He held his spoon inside the stew and held the baked potato in his other hand. Saturn seriously wanted to hurl that potato at Div for sitting there and doing nothing. Happily sitting at the dining table while Pika was treating him with broken ribs and who-knows-what-else. “You can’t just say you’re going to help him and then start pointless arguments. Heal him.”
Saturn threw his hands at Div. “You can’t be talking!” he yelled. “You’re the reason we’re here. You left us when we were fighting for you and Pika had to save me. And now, you’re sitting here eating peacefully instead of doing something to help.”
“Man, I’m sorry I needed a little bit of help. I’m sorry I’m too injured to help someone!”
“Guys—”
“We all are!”
“Guys!”
Silence quickly filled the room. Div rolled his eyes at Saturn. Saturn in turn clenched his teeth and huffed to the side. Pika—loyal, selfless Pika—had taken his helmet and half his chestplace off. Saturn hated it. He hated Div’s selfishness and Pika’s selflessness. He hated himself for being a coward and useless. He hated every single thing that has happened today.
“We’ve had enough fighting today,” Pika said softly.
“Sorry,” Saturn whispered. Div said nothing.
Saturn expected Pika’s words to understate the extent of his injuries. But he didn’t expect it to be this bad. The moment he took off Pika’s clothing, a loud gasp escaped his mouth. Most of Pika’s torso was colored with dark red to black bruises. His forearms, not covered by armor, were littered with bright, neon scars mixed with his blood. How in the world did Pika decide his injuries were less of a priority than Div’s or Saturn’s?
"Oh my god... How many wardens did you fight?" Saturn asked.
"More than six or seven."
"..."
Maybe he should just leave Pika to tend for himself.
The next hour was calm. As if Saturn wasn’t holding his anger all day or there wasn’t a fight in some upside down castle or the trio hadn’t argued just before. Saturn carefully bandaged Pika’s torso and scars as he ate. Div finished his food and was now writing notes for his video ideas. When Saturn finished, it was his turn to start eating as Pika cared for him. These injuries are pretty bad, too, Pika commented. Not as bad as yours, Saturn replied. Pika, of course, could not argue against that.
When they finished, everyone sat in silence for the next ten minutes. Saturn closed his eyes and leaned back against the chair, Div continued writing his video ideas, and Pika fiddled with the gauze tape. Saturn knew he had to address it. He had to stop being a coward and yelling his feelings at everyone except the main reason of it all. Div. He was so close to doing it already before Pika stopped them. He feared if he hesitated now, he’d never be able to say anything again.
Yet again, when he opened his eyes to his, he couldn’t say anything. The dim candles shone a warm hue on them, and the idleness reminded Saturn of the old times. When everyone’s social battery crashed after a chaotic birthday. When everyone argued just to laugh it off in the end instead of begging for it to end. When things were better.
He imagined what would happen if he opened his mouth. He imagined Pika, trying to get them to stop fighting or tighten their broken friendship once they started arguing. He could see Div calling them toxic the same way he told Orlix. Nothing would change except for Div leaving the group, leaving Saturn and Pika with guilt and loneliness. Maybe that would be better. Maybe it wouldn’t.
Saturn feared it wouldn’t.
So he closed his eyes and let the moment pass by.