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A rare shipment of exotic goods had arrived in the city, word had spread quickly through the palace
Traders from distant lands had brought silks, jewelry, perfumes, and other stuff that were rarely seen in Jerusalem and I knew exactly what I wanted to do, find a gift for my husband, King Baldwin IV
The thought brought a small smile to my face. Baldwin never asked for gifts, in truth, he cared very little for expensive things
If I could find something that would make him smile, maybe the trip would be worth it
A knock sounded at my door " Your Majesty ? " one of my servants called
" You may enter " and the door opened, three women stepped inside carrying pieces of clothing folded in their arms
I stood from my chair and walked toward them. Normally, when I left the palace, I dressed as a queen should
One servant carefully brushed my hair while another laid several dresses across the bed. " You cannot wear your usual gowns today " she said and I nodded
If I appeared in the market dressed as a queen, half the city would know and would recognize me
All the dresses options that they gave me were made from good but ordinary cloth with basic colors. Nothing about them would immediately reveal that I was the queen or a noble
I picked the one which I liked the most. One servant wrapped a veil around my hair, hiding most of it from view
When they stepped back, I barely recognized myself in the mirror. I looked more like the wife of a merchant than the Queen of Jerusalem
But the servants seemed pleased with their work. For the first time in a long while, I looked almost ordinary
As I adjusted my sleeves, another knock sounded at the door " Enter "
The door opened, and one of the king's advisors stepped inside and bowed respectfully " I see that you are determined to visit the market today, your majesty " he said
" I am " and I smiled kindly
" The city is overflowing with visitors today " and I could hear the worry from his voice " Citizens from every corner of Jerusalem arrived...the streets will be crowded. A single rumor that the queen is present could cause chaos "
" I will not be alone " I replied back as I walked towards the window, below, I could see people moving thought the palace courtyard
" Yes " he agreed " But even with guards, crowds are unpredictable "
Jerusalem was generally safe, especially near the palace but on days like this, anything could happen but this would not stop me
" I think your Majesty should consider the risks "
" I will go " I said
He bowed his head " Then may God watch over your journey " After he left, I gathered my cloak around my shoulders
With that thought in mind, I stepped out of my chambers and began making my way toward the bustling market of Jerusalem
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The palace gates slowly opened before me
People walked in every direction, merchants pushed carts loaded with stuff. Children ran through narrow alleys and I heard a few people speaking different languages
Summer meant more higher temperatures, which meant more people looking for shade
Behind me, four men followed at a distance, to anyone watching, they looked like ordinary travelers but they were actually my guards
For once, I was seeing Jerusalem through the eyes of an ordinary woman, I noticed things I normally missed.. two girls helping their mother carry water, people selling stuff everywhere, beggars
My thoughts drifted toward Baldwin, what would he like?that question had followed me all morning
I knew many people assumed gifts for a king should be expensive but I wanted something personal, something that came from my heart
Lost in thought, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. Suddenly, I walked directly into someone
"Ah!" And I stumbled backward " My apologies ! "
The old man gave me an unpleased look " Watch where you are going, woman ! "
Several people turned to look and I was not used to being spoken that way. In the palace nobody dared but here, he had no idea who I was
" Apologies won't open your eyes, woman " and the man muttered a few curses to me
Before the situation could grow worse, one of my disguised guards stepped forward " My friend " the guard said with a friendly smile " It was an accident "
The angry man looked around and seemed to realize he was making a scene over a simple mistake
" Fine... " With one final hateful look in my direction, the man turned and disappeared into the crowd
" Are you alright ? "
" Yes...thank you " I said quietly, nodding. He gave a small bow and returned to his position
We entered the market slowly and it was like the whole world had gathered in one place. Voice shouted from every direction " Spices from Egypt ! ", " Silk! Fine Silk ! , " Fresh Bread ! "
People pushed past each other in tight spaces. The air was warm, the smell of cooked food, herbs an animals all mixed together
I had to stay close to my guards so I would not be separated and I could feel how easy it would be to get lost in this crowd
My eyes moved from stall to stall, there were so many things to see and go
One stall had bright silk cloths from far away lands, another had a collection of spices and a little farther, I saw carved wooden animals and small statues
I slowed down, asking myself again. What would Baldwin like ?
People brushed past me from all sides...a woman carrying bread almost hit my arm, a man with baskets on his back stepped on my shoe accidentally
I thought about how Baldwin loved knowledge. He studied battles and strategies more than anything else
A book, that would be perfect!
We continued walking until I saw a small stall tucked between two larger ones. It was not as crowded as the others
The seller was an older man with white hair. He studied me carefully as I approached, as if trying to decide what kind of customer I was
" Looking for something special ? " he asked
" Yes " I said, looking at the pile of books scattered around " Something about history.... battles, if possible "
He reached under the table and pulled out a thick book. The cover was dark leather and it looked like it was quite old
" This " he said, placing it in front of me " is a record of great wars of the old kingdoms, including the famous battles "
I opened it slightly and I noticed how the pages were old but well kept. The writing inside was neat and there were some small drawings of soliders
" How much ? " I asked
He hesitated for a moment, then spoke " 35 bezants "
The number made a few nearby shoppers turn their heads, it was a high price for a book but money was no problem for me
I reached into the small pouch hidden beneath my cloak and without hesistation, I counted out the amount
The vendor’s eyes widened slightly as he saw the full payment. He quickly pulled the coins toward himself, as if afraid I might change my mind
" Thank you for buying this book ! " and he smiled at me
" You are welcome " I took the book in my hands and it felt havier than it appeared. Baldwin will love this, I am sure
The crowd was even thicker now, people pushed past each other, laughing, shouting, arguing over prices
My guards were still behind me, I thought
" Move ! " I heard a scream from somewhere
People started turning their heads in the left, I could not see what was wrong. People in front of me blocked my view. I tried to rise a little on my feet but without success
" It's FIRE ! " Another shout was heard and panic spread quickly
I turned my head scared, trying to find my guards but I could not see them anymore
Something hit the ground nearby, a stall, maybe. People suddenly pushed forward, running in various directions
A man rushed past me and knocked my shoulder. I almost dropped the book, but I held it tighter
Then another push came from behind, this time I lost my balance completely and I fell. My hands hit the ground first and I felt pain through my palm as my knuckles hit against the stone
People rushed past me without seeing me while I was on the ground
Out of a sudden, strong hands reached for me " Over here ! " and I heard the voice of one of my guards
One of them pulled me up quickly, lifting me from the ground. Another stepped in front of me, blocking the crowd as people continued to panic around us
" Are you hurt ? " He asked worried
" I...I will be fine "
" There’s no time " another guard said sharply, but not unkindly " We must move " and they guided me through the crowd
We moved fast, turning away from the main path of the market and ending up in a narrower street. Here, there were fewer people
" What is happening ? " I asked, still shaken, holding the book
One of the guards looked back toward the direction we had come from " A stall caught fire " he said " People panicked when they saw the flames and smoke "
" I lost sight of you " I said quietly
" You were pushed into the center " one guard replied " It was difficult even for us to reach you "
" We should take you back to the palace "
And this is when the advisor’s words came back to me. Back then I thought he was only being careful, maybe even a little too worried but...he was right in the end
He had been trying to protect me from exactly what had just happened
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By the time I returned to the palace, the sun was beginning to lower in the sky
The servants had cleaned the small scratches on my arm and knuckles, and while they still hurted a bit, they were nothing serious
I sat alone at a table, the wrapped book resting beside me. Before today, I had thought I understood Jerusalem well...but walking through the city disguised had shown me something very different
I felt a gaze on me and as I looked up, one of the servants stood in the doorway " My Queen "
" Yes ? " I replied
The servant bowed " His Majesty requires your presence "
I smiled slightly and stood " Thank you " and the servant stepped aside as I picked up the wrapped book
The book was the reason I went to the market in the first place. Despite everything that had happened, I was glad I had found it
I made my way through the palace corridors until I reached Baldwin's place
A guard opened the door for me and inside, I found Baldwin seated at a large wooden table. Several scrolls were before him and his attention was fixed on what he was writing with his bandaged hand
His silver mask covered his face as always, hiding much of the illness he carried
He wore white robes trimmed with gold, making him stand out against the darker colors of the room
The moment he saw me, his attention shifted completely " My love... " his voice was warm, though I immediately noticed that he had a hint of worry
" How was your journey to the market? "
I blinked " How do you know about this ? "
A faint sigh escaped him " I am King of Jerusalem, very little happens in this city without someone actually informing me.. "
Baldwin setted down his quill and raised slowly from his chair " And from what I heard " he continued " Your visit to the market became far more dangerous than it should have been " and he walked slowly
" And you were injured..." his eyes lowered briefly toward my arm, the scratches had been cleaned, but they were still visible
" My dear " he said softly " do you have any idea how easily this could have become worse? "
I opened my mouth to say something, but I could not, he was right...
" I spent the entire afternoon wondering whether you were safe.. "
The concern in his voice made me feel far worse than any lecture could have
He was frightened of what might have happened and I understanded his worry " I am sorry " I said quietly
For a moment, neither of us spoke. Then I remembered the wrapped package in my hands
A smile slowly returned to my face " This...this is for you " and he tilted his head slightly toward the package
Knowing that it would be hard for him to open the package because of his bandages, I did it instead
" This is for me ? " He asked as he looked at the book " Yes " I said " I thought you would like it...it speaks about the great wars of the old kingdoms "
I handed him the book and he slowly opened it, turning the first page with care " I love it, thank you " he said softly
Baldwin closed the book gently and placed it on the table, as if it was something precious " You should not have gone through all that trouble "
" It was worth it, if it makes you happy " I smiled
Baldwin reached up slightly, as if he wanted to touch my face, but he stopped halfway and slowly pulled back his hand
" Baldwin…" I whispered
He shaked his head " My condition… it's dangerous...I cannot forget this and I cannot risk you because of me "
My heart sank a little " You are not dangerous to me " I said quickly
He gave a small, sad breath " I wish that was true " and then he stepped back again, putting a little space between us
His bright blue eyes looked at me like I was something he wanted to touch, but could not allow himself to
I stepped forward without hesistation and gently wrapped the hands around him, my face rested lightly against his chest
I could feel the soft fabric of his white and gold robes and his heartbeat
" You...you should not-.. " he started again, but his voice was weaker and very gently, he placed one hand on my back
I pulled back just slightly so I could look at him
Suddenly, a knock came at the door. A servant stepped in carefully, keeping his eyes lowered " Dinner is ready.. "
I stepped back from Baldwin and his eyes stayed on me for a moment longer. He turned slightly toward the servant " Thank you " he said calmly
The servant bowed quickly and left the room without another word
And for a second, it felt like he wanted to say something else but he didn't
Instead, he gave a small nod " Come " he said softly " Let us eat "
And as we walked, I thought that today was not a simple day
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