Chapter Text
« Come on, it's exciting isn't it? We're not delinquents Sannie, we won't break anything. Just... remember some old good memories. At night. And without permission. »
San stared at his best friend and roommate. Wooyoung always had this ride or die kind of personality ; so of course he loved the idea of sneaking into their old high school at night, visiting it. And for what ? The thrills it could give him, and ''having fun''. In his case, he wasn't sure if the idea was worth it, San wasn't ready to get arrested. He had studies to finish in hope to become a sports journalist. And having his criminal record stained wasn't one of his plans.
« Pleaaaaaaaaase Sannie. We're all going, even Jongho and Seonghwa agreed. There's only you left. »
The slightly older male sighed deeply, looking down at his phone screen where their chat group was displayed. It was full of emojis spammed by Yunho, and Mingi sharing that he was excited. Hongjoong saying they all were crazy but still agreeing to come though... He could feel Wooyoung's stare on him as he kept pushing him while repeating the word 'please'. San was still hesitating, ready to say he won't come until a new message was posted in the chat: Is Sanie coming ?
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« So you decided to come. What made you change your mind ? »
He had to tilt his head up to be able to meet Yunho's gaze. The art student was sitting in front of him in the bus, Mingi next to him, engrossed in a conversation with Yeosang. San smiled, giving a small shrug as he leaned closer to Yunho's seat so only he could hear. He sent a brief glance toward his best friend who was too excited to listen to BTS's new song to wait until tomorrow. Wooyoung had no idea what made him finally accept to go out tonight, and kept asking him about that. But there was no way San could admit the real reason to anyone.
« I didn't want the seven of you to have fun without me I guess. »
The smile Yunho showed at his answer was so bright that San had to blink a couple of times. Or maybe it was because of the bus's neon lights contrasting with the dark sky outside ? But he slightly doubted it.
« I'm glad you came, it wouldn't have been the same without you. »
His stomach didn't make a loop at these words, not at all. San ignored the weird feeling in his body and instead stared at the art student curiously. They weren't that close during high school. Yunho was part of the most popular students, which wasn't surprising since he had always been handsome and kind, never treating others like they were worth less than him. He was funny too, a real sunshine like the girls in his previous classes liked to call him.
San on the contrary was kind of a nobody. He had friends of course, met Wooyoung and Yeosang in his first year and the trio never left each other ever since. He was lucky enough to not be bullied, but people just didn't really care about him. He was slim back then. Too slim for a boy, a little bit androgynous which made most of his classmates uneasy. It's only when he started working out that people's gaze on him started to change, one year ago.
Yunho and him grew closer during their years of college, after the taller male and Wooyoung joined the same dance club. Little by little, the group of friends grew, from 3 they became 5 and soon after Hongjoong, Seonghwa and Jongho joined them too. So San wondered why Yunho could be so happy to have him around tonight ; since they didn't have many common memories from their teenage years. He remained silent though, and simply smiled at him.
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« Let's make two groups. It'll be easier to find a way to enter. What do you think ? »
They all agreed with Hongjoong. Since the main door was obviously closed, they needed to find another way in. For safety measures, they decided to make only two groups of four people ; Mingi, Seonghwa, Jongho and Hongjoong staying at the front while the others would look at the back of the building.
« Guys let's go ! »
Wooyoung was so excited he couldn't stop bouncing , making quick steps to reach the back of the school as he was urging others to move faster. San rolled his eyes, a long sigh escaping his lips. He loved his best friend, he really did. They were almost total opposites but got along really well, never fighting over important things. But the small, useless ones created chaos between them sometimes.
« You can go ahead if you want, I'm not especially excited to break the law. » San replied with the softest tone he could, despite his friend annoying him a little. Yeosang who had been quiet since the beginning seemed to feel the slight tension and immediately linked his arm with Wooyoung. « I'll go with you. Sannie will join us soon. » And without giving Wooyoung time to answer, he was the one dragging him to find an entry.
« You really didn't want to come, did you ?» Yunho had been staring at the three best friends, a small smile stretching his lips. San was actually surprised to see how calm he seemed, when he usually was loud when he was around Mingi ; acting cute and silly.
« I'm just worried. If we get caught, I can say goodbye to my future career. I don't know how you guys don't even worry a bit. »
« I have to admit it's not something I worry about. We're not going to hurt anyone or steal anything. If we get caught I doubt we risk anything big. But maybe that's my artistic and rebellious sides talking. » A small yet mischievous smile stretched Yunho's lips at his last words. Rebel... That wasn't the first word San would use to describe him. He was mostly gentle, cute and funny. But the taller man looked entirely too pleased with himself though, hands shoved into the pockets of his jacket as they continued walking along the back of the building.
« Don't look at me like that. » Yunho immediately pointed a finger at him, eyes squinted in a playful manner; which made him blink a few times, confused. « I'm not looking at you. » He tried to defend himself, glancing away briefly, probably a little bit shy from getting caught. « You are. » « I'm really not. » Yunho's laughter echoed softly through the night. Before San could answer, Wooyoung's excited voice suddenly rang out somewhere ahead. « GUYS! OVER HERE! » The four of them immediately picked up their pace.
They found Wooyoung and Yeosang crouched beside one of the old gymnasium windows. « It's open.» Wooyoung announced proudly. « How exactly did you find that?» San asked suspiciously. Wooyoung grinned. « I used to skip PE.»
« ... »
« ... »
« ... »
« Honestly, that explains a lot.» Yunho said.
Ten minutes later, all eight of them had successfully climbed inside the school. For a while, everything was exactly what Wooyoung had hoped for. They wandered through familiar hallways, peeked into old classrooms... Mingi dramatically reenacted embarrassing memories while Hongjoong repeatedly reminded everyone not to touch anything. Seonghwa took pictures. Jongho looked increasingly done with everyone's nonsense. And somehow, despite all his earlier reluctance, San found himself enjoying it. The school looked smaller than he remembered, the hallways narrower and the classrooms less intimidating. Time really changed things.Or maybe they had simply grown up. « Remember when Professor Kim caught Wooyoung sleeping during a test? » Yeosang asked.
« I wasn't sleeping.»
« You were snoring. »
« I was thinking with my eyes closed. »
« That's called sleeping. » San laughed. The sound surprised even him. He hadn't realized how nostalgic all of this would feel.
At some point the group split naturally. Wooyoung and Yeosang disappeared down one hallway while Mingi dragged Jongho toward the gym. Hongjoong and Seonghwa went looking for the art rooms; leaving San and Yunho alone. Again. The realization should not have made him suddenly aware of every little thing, but it did. The sound of Yunho's footsteps. The warmth of his arm brushing against his own from time to time. The way he always seemed to walk slightly closer than necessary.
« You okay? » San blinked, not sure why the elder asked him this. Did he look annoyed or upset? « You've been quiet. »
« I'm just… thinking. »
«That’s dangerous. »
« Yah. » Yunho laughed again. That smile. That stupid bright smile. San looked away as he kept walking ahead. And they eventually ended up on the second floor, near the classrooms used by the literature department. Everything was silent, almost peaceful. Then—
A loud slam echoed somewhere downstairs.The two of them froze. « What was that? » San whispered. Yunho frowned. Before either of them could move, another sound followed. Footsteps. Heavy footsteps. Coming from the main staircase. « Oh no. » Yunho’s voice slightly echoed between the walls, low and deep. « Oh no? » He repeated, unsure what was going on. Yunho looked remarkably calm considering the situation. San, on the other hand, started to feel his soul leaving his body. « The guardian. » « The what? » « The guardian! »
Yunho's eyes widened and the footsteps grew closer. « Run. » No need to ask him twice, San obeyed and the two of them immediately took off. Somewhere behind them a voice shouted. « HEY! » They turned a corner. Another. Then another. Yunho suddenly grabbed San's wrist. « This way. » Before San could say anything, he was pulled inside one of the classrooms, the door closed quietly behind them. Both remained completely still; listening. The footsteps approached.Passed by. And then stopped. For several terrifying seconds neither of them breathed. Then the footsteps slowly faded away.
Absolute silence. Only then did San realize something. They were hiding in the very back corner of the classroom. And Yunho was still holding his wrist. Very tightly. The room was dark, the only light coming from the moon shining through the windows. For a moment neither of them moved nor they spoke. But then Yunho let out a quiet laugh. Not loud. Not bright. Just soft. And somehow that sound settled directly inside San's chest. « That was close. »
In the dim light, there wasn't much to see. No shining eyes beneath the moonlight. No bright smile illuminating the darkness. Because Yunho was simply human. Yet San could hear the smile in his voice. Could almost picture the curve of his lips. He could feel the warmth radiating from where their shoulders touched. Could smell the familiar scent of Yunho's cologne. Simple. Comforting. Warm. It suited him. And for some reason, San found himself wanting to stay exactly where he was. The realization came so suddenly it nearly stole his breath.
He liked being close to him. Not because Yunho was his friend. Not because he trusted him. Not because they had grown closer these past few years. No, it was something else. Something bigger. Something that made his heart beat a little faster whenever Yunho smiled, that made him answer messages faster when they came from Yunho. Something that had apparently been growing quietly without him noticing.
Oh. That was… A problem. Because he was pretty sure - No. He was absolutely sure. He liked Jeong Yunho.
« San? » Yunho’s voice was soft, almost like a whisper despite the guardian being gone by now.
« Hm? »
« You're staring. »
He scoffed, more as a defense mechanism though, feeling his cheeks blushing. « I can barely see you.»
« You were still staring. » San groaned and Yunho laughed softly again. The sound made his stomach flip. This was terrible, absolutely terrible.
« Do you ever think about high school? » Yunho suddenly asked. The question caught him off guard.
« Sometimes. »
« Me too. » A comfortable silence settled between them. Then Yunho continued. « You know, I remember a lot of things. The art student was being more and more cryptic, San’s curiosity being fully caught by those words. « Such as? »
« The first time Wooyoung got detention. » The younger one laughed, nodding slightly. « I do remember that. »
« The day Yeosang accidentally broke a chair. » This time, he hummed softly. If he remembers well, that was during their first year, and back then, San wasn’t in the same class as them. Despite himself, San laughed. Then, Yunho's voice softened. « I remember a lot about you too. » The smile faded from San's lips. Curiosity was slipping through his veins, mixed with something he couldn’t explain even if he wanted to.
« You do? »
« Yeah. » There was something different in Yunho's tone now. Something gentler? More vulnerable.
« The blue sweater you always wore. »
San blinked, caught by surprise. « What? »
« The one that was two sizes too big. »
« You remember that? »
« I remember you lending it to Yeosang when he forgot his jacket. »
San stared. Yunho continued. « The way you always sat near the windows. »
« … »
« The notebook you covered in stickers. »
« … »
« The fact that you pretended not to care when people ignored you. »
San's breath caught. The moon shifted behind the clouds. A little more light entered the room. Just enough for him to finally see Yunho properly. And suddenly the taller man looked nervous. Actually nervous. « You remember all that? » San asked quietly. Yunho smiled. Small and shy. Or at least it seemed so.
« Yeah. »
« How? »
For a second Yunho didn't answer, his gaze dropping to the floor. Then he laughed softly. The sound carried years worth of affection. Years worth of feelings. « You really don't know? » San's heart skipped. Because suddenly he did know. Or at least he thought he did. The silence stretched between them. Neither willing to say it first. Until Yunho finally sighed. « I had a crush on you. » San forgot how to breathe.
« What? »
« In high school. » The confession came out almost sheepish. Like something Yunho had been carrying for far too long.
« I thought you were very cute. »
San's heart nearly exploded. « You had a crush on me? »
Yunho laughed nervously. « You're making it sound unbelievable. »
« Because it is unbelievable. »
The taller man shook his head. Then,he replied quieter: « I liked you for years, San. »
Years. The word echoed inside his head. Years. While he had spent high school convinced nobody paid attention to him. Yunho had been noticing everything. The oversized sweaters. The notebooks. The quiet moments. Everything. Without thinking, San reached for his hand, almost apprehensively. « So all this time… » San whispered.
« Yeah. »
« And you never said anything. »
« I was a teenager. »
« Fair. »
Another laugh escaped them. This one softer. Warmer. The distance between them somehow disappeared. Or maybe San was simply noticing it now. Maybe he had always wanted to be closer. Maybe he had just never realized. Or didn’t dare to. The moonlight reflected faintly in Yunho's eyes. For the first time that night, San could actually see his smile. And somehow it felt exactly the same as hearing it. Warm. Bright. Comforting.
« I think I might be an idiot. » San admitted slowly.
Yunho chuckled. « Why? »
San looked down at their intertwined hands, then back at him. Because there was no point pretending anymore. Not after everything. Not after tonight. « Because I only figured it out five minutes ago. »
Yunho blinked. « Figured out what? »
San smiled. The answer came easier than expected. « That I like you too. »
For once, Jung Yunho looked completely speechless. And somehow, that might have been San's favorite memory of the entire night.