Chapter Text
Lily looked up, her arms wrapped around her body. She looked up just like she practiced. God, she hoped her mom could see how much she practiced. She must've been sitting somewhere in front right? Lily wouldn’t know. The lights were too bright. The lights on her. They practiced a lot, but never with lights. Would it be different now? What if she fucks it up because she isn’t used to the lights? The music began playing. Lily hadn’t heard of it before her mom suggested it. It was some kind of classic piano thing? Lily really didn’t know. What she did know is that when the violin joins the piano she has to push forward, do a simple turn and start skating backwards. Just like she practiced. Surely her mom must realize how much she practiced? Lily became more used to the lights now. That's when she heard the violin. Lily pushed forward and her thougths dissapeared. She really did practice, because she was basically on auto-pilot now. Even the lights seemed to have dimmed. Or maybe she just stopped noticing them. The only thing she noticed is that it was going well. Well enough to hear the crowd clapping at least. They clapped after her step sequence. Then again when she landed her toe loop. She practiced particularly hard on that one. Her mom would know. The crowd just kept celebrating after everything she did. She felt like she was high (though she didn’t really know how that was suposed to feel like, but it must’ve been something like this?).
Maybe that feeling was what numbed her. It couldn’t have been that she didn’t practice well enough. Everyone must’ve noticed how well she practiced. Or were the lights still to bright? Did the brightness affect on how well clearly she was thinking? Maybe that was why she only realized what happened when she heard gasps from the crowd instead of the usual applause.
***
New York. The place where dreams come true. That would’ve meant a lot more to Lily if she HAD any dreams that could come true. But she gave up on dreams. Not in a depressed ‘i hate everything’ way, but in a way that she would much rather just see whats going to happen than lay awake dreaming. Her best friend Mary, however, was a dreamer. She always said that that was the only way she ‘got shit done’. Lily didn’t buy it. Because she knew how hard she worked. And that wasn’t just because of some dream. Most people who dream don’t even come as far as Mary. It must’ve been something else. Lily had yet to find out what, though.
Mary had explained to her last year what that dream of her’s was. And it really didn’t come as a surprise to Lily when she told her it was fashion. Mary had always known exactly how to look and dress. Lily looked up to her for it. The surprise came when Mary showed her designs. Because even when Lily knew how talented Mary was, these designs were even better. And when Mary said she wanted to move to New York for more connections within the fashion world, Lily didn’t hesitate a second to move with her. Because the impossible high pricing of NY apartments became slightly less impossible when you’re with two.
That's what brought them here. The city of dreams. And a small loft apartment that barely had enough space for their stuff, let alone for them to live in. Lily hadn’t always been the tallest of people their age, but even she could reach the ceiling when she put her hands up. And for the ‘bedroom’ (not sure if you can call it a room when it only has 3 walls) above in the loft was only some crouching space left. At least the living room/kitchen/dining room had a bit more space, as the top floor didn’t reach all the way across. Right next to the entrance was a supply closet. Next to that were two doors. One was an office (which was surprisingly big) and a bathroom (and it became clear where exactly the office got all that space from) The opposite wall was almost completely covered in windows, but who needs privacy anyway?
Lily knew that the office would be Mary’s, since the whole reason to move here was for her work. Yet she was still caught off guard when Mary offered to sleep there as well. She hadn’t really thought about that yet – who would sleep where. But this did make sense. That also meant that Lily would get the whole upper floor of the loft. And whether she had to crouch or not, she quite liked the idea of that.
That's when the whole moving in process began. It took them about 2 months to make the place somewhat pretty and there was still a lot that needed to be done. Mary was locked up in her office most of the time, so she couldn’t really help either. Maybe Lily should’ve objected on her also using that as her bedroom? They barely saw each other now. Not all of it was Mary’s fault though. Lily had been incredibly busy looking for a job. She was looking for something that required her to bake. Because god knows she loves baking. Eventually the best she could do is become a waitress at some small cafe in the same building as they lived. She started about a week ago, and the fear of messing up has not quite went away yet. She still secretly prays every shift that she somehow got the chance to show off her baking skills and make everyone fall in love with it. But she also knows that that is something that only happens in movies.
For now she is settled. For now she is comfortable.
Doubtful and dreamless is how she starts her life here.
And not even god knows how it will end.