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Zoe was depressed. She wouldn't admit it, but she was depressed.
She had been in Bluebell for months, and people still didn’t like her.
Maybe she still had to work on how she acted a bit. Okay, a lot. But they didn’t make the effort either. They already hated her before she got to town. She didn’t understand their problem.
And they just kept getting meaner.
She wasn’t sure how much more she could take.
The final straw was earlier that day.
How was she supposed to know that it was tick season?! They didn't teach that in med school, and she was a New Yorker. Just another thing to add to the ever-growing list as to why the town hated her.
And then Wade had to go and make some stupid joke, which made everyone (which was pretty much most of the town) in the Rammer Jammer laugh at her.
She felt the sting of tears in her eyes and got the hell out of there as quickly as she could.
Things were bad enough without people seeing her cry.
She really should have just gone back to New York. She should've left this town behind and gone back to the city that she knew and loved. She could've found somewhere else to work; it was a big city after all. But she didn’t want to deal with her mother.
She saw no reason to go back to work and didn’t really want to go back to the carriage house, so she spent a few hours at a bar in Mobile, drowning her sorrows in alcohol, until they kicked her out.
She somehow managed to get a ride back to Bluebell and got dropped off at The Dixie Stop, where she stocked up on supplies of more alcohol as well as painkillers for the awful hangover she was definitely going to have tomorrow.
Instead of going straight back home (when she started thinking of the carriage house as home, she wasn’t sure and tried to push that thought away), she stopped at the cemetery.
“Hi,” she muttered softly to the grave in front of her. “I’m sorry that I’m letting you down. It’s all I seem to do, anyway, so it shouldn’t be much of a surprise," she chuckled sarcastically. "I’ve let my mother down my whole life by not being who she wanted me to be. I’ve let my dad, well, my other dad, down by not getting the fellowship. And now, I’ve let you down. The only person who clearly believed in me. I’m sorry that I’m fucking everything up with your practice. You worked so hard for it and this town, and I’m here a few months, and everything is going to shit. You should’ve just left it to Brick. It’s not like he wants me here anyway…” Zoe paused and could feel herself about to cry. “I really wish I had known you. I wish we had properly met. I wish I could be someone you could be proud of. I’m so sorry, dad.” Zoe was sobbing. “Maybe one day we’ll be able to meet and talk. Maybe that day will be soon. Who knows. I’m sure this town would be happy if I were gone. And there are probably a few people who would actually get rid of me.” Zoe sniffled and wiped her face with her sleeve. “Bye dad.” She kissed the headstone and walked away.
-
She was almost to her door when she was interrupted by a voice she really didn’t want to hear.
“Hey, Doc!” Wade called out. “You missed out on some serious surgery today! Tom got a splinter! It was touch-and-go for a while, but luckily, he made it.” Wade was laughing at the end.
Zoe just continued to walk, ignoring him.
“Still embarrassed by our almost sexcapade? Or are you waiting for the right time for another go?” Wade continued, walking beside her so he could give her a wink and a nudge on the arm.
“Just fuck off, Wade! Isn’t there anybody else you can bother?!”
They looked at each other, shocked by her outburst.
“Sorry, it’s been a long day.” Zoe felt embarrassed.
Wade just nodded and ran his hands through his hair. Zoe watched the movement and tried to ignore the feeling in her stomach that it gave her. Or maybe that was just all of the alcohol.
“See ya, Wade,” Zoe murmured, walking up the steps to the house.
“Night, Doc,” Wade replied, giving her a salute.
When she was inside, Zoe locked the doors and got comfortable on the floor with her new friends, Cheap Beer and Boxed Wine.
-
Wade couldn’t get the interaction out of his mind.
There was something…off about Zoe, but he couldn’t put his finger on it.
He’d been waiting God knows how long at the main house for Lavon to return so Wade could talk to him, and Lavon finally returned around Wade’s fourth beer.
“Finally, man! Where the hell have you been?” Wade felt like he should be shaking with how pent up he felt.
“Mayor stuff. Like always. Since I am, you know, the Mayor,” Lavon replied, rolling his eyes at Wade.
“Yeah, well, I’ve been waiting for ya. Need to talk.” Wade was running his hands through his hair, feeling nervous.
“What’s up?” Lavon asked him, grabbing himself a beer from the fridge.
“I had a weird interaction with Zoe earlier tonight,” Wade began.
“Weird how?” Lavon questioned.
“Well, she yelled at me. But then, she apologised for yelling at me.” Wade told him.
“Huh,” was all Lavon said.
“‘Huh’? That’s all you’ve got? ‘Huh’?!” Wade had got up from the counter and started to pace.
“What do you want me to say?” Lavon was confused.
“I dunno. But don’t you think it’s weird that she apologised?” Wade was waving his hands about as he spoke.
“Okay. What exactly did she say?” Lavon asked, and Wade told him.
“Huh,” Lavon said again, and Wade was getting annoyed.
“Again with the ‘huh’! Something’s off, Lavon!” Wade snapped.
“Ohhh! I get it!” Lavon snapped his fingers and grinned. “You like her!”
“What?!” Wade stopped pacing and turned to look at Lavon.
“Yeah! That’s what this is all about! Man, you’re like a 3rd grader with a crush on a girl, so you pull at her pigtails and tease her.” Lavon looked smug, like he had figured everything out.
“No, Lavon, listen! Apart from this morning, have you seen her at all today?”
“Now that you mention it, no, I haven’t.” Lavon tilted his head, thinking.
“Exactly! And usually, she’s everywhere! So where did she go and why is she being weird?” Wade was mostly talking to himself at that point.
“Why don’t you go and ask her?”
“What?! Why?!”
“Because you want to be around her,” Lavon said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
“A – I don’t. And 2 – she’s probably with someone.”
“Why’d’ya say that?” Lavon asked.
“Because she was carrying enough booze to throw a rager.”
“You didn’t tell me that before,” Lavon frowned.
“Didn’t think it mattered,” Wade shrugged.
“It does. I was near the carriage house, and there was no sign of anyone home. No lights. No noise. Nothing.” Lavon was a little confused. “You sure she went inside?”
“100%,” Wade confirmed.
“How did she seem?” Lavon questioned.
“What do you mean?” It was Wade’s turn to frown.
“Did she seem upset?”
“How would I know?” Wade shrugged.
“How wouldn’t you know if someone is upset?” Lavon knew that Wade could be a bit dense sometimes, but really?
“Because usually when I’m with a woman, they're having a good time,” Wade smirked.
Lavon chose to ignore Wade and continued.
“Well, was she sniffling? Did she have her arms around herself? Was her nose red? Were her eyes bloodshot and watery?”
“Huh. Now that you mention it, yeah. To all of that,” Wade nodded.
“Then she’s upset.” Lavon rolled his eyes.
“Alright. So what do we do now?” Wade asked?
“‘We’.” It was Lavon’s turn to be confused.
“Yes, ‘we’. You know about this stuff, Lavon. Do we leave her alone? Go talk to her? Bring her a basket of mini muffins?” Wade never had this problem with women, so he wasn’t sure what the protocol was.
“Nope. You’re the one who’s worried, so you go talk to her.” Lavon took a long swig of his beer.
“Who said I was worried?” Wade felt nervous again.
“Erm…you did. With the rambling and pacing and sighing and messing up your hair.” Lavon was concerned that Wade really was an idiot.
Wade immediately sat down and tried to keep still, but his foot started to tap against the floor.
“Look,” Lavon sighed. “Just go over there with some more beer and those good chips she likes and just see if she wants a bit of company.”
Wade grimaced.
“Or go home and lie wide awake in bed, staring at the ceiling and worrying.” Lavon grinned at him.
“Fine! I’ll go. But if this goes badly, I’m blaming you!” Wade got up to grab the supplies, then stomped towards the door.
“But if it goes well, I wanna be best man and have your firstborn named after me,” Lavon chuckled.
Wade gave him the finger and jogged towards Zoe’s.
-
“Doc?” Wade knocked on the door. “It’s your annoying neighbour,” he called out.
No answer.
“Wondered if you wanted company.”
More knocking from his side. More silence from hers.
“I got the good chips?” He hoped that would sway her.
Nothing.
“Doc?”
Silence.
“Look, Zoe,” Wade swallowed, not used to saying her name. “I’m sorry for this morning at the Rammer Jammer. If you want me to leave you alone, just tell me, yeah?"
Nothing.
“Zoe?” Wade tried, knocking once more.
He sighed, moving away from the door and around the porch, towards the windows.
There was a tiny light coming from somewhere inside. So tiny that if you blinked, you’d miss it.
“Zoe?” Wade tried again, this time, knocking on the window.
He heard a clink, the type from a beer bottle. He knew the sound well.
The curtains were mostly open, probably from this morning, so he could see inside.
And his heart did something at the sight.
Zoe was lying on the floor, surrounded by beer bottles.
Although lying wasn’t the right word.
It didn’t look like she had fallen asleep.
“Zoe?!” Wade called out louder this time and started hammering on the window.
Still nothing.
He barely remembered the next few seconds – dropping what he was holding and trying to get the screen doors open. They were locked, so he broke them down.
The door to her actual room, however, was a different story.
He pulled out his phone and called Lavon as he tried to break down the other door as well.
“How’s it going?” Lavon asked with a smirk in his voice.
“Get down here with the keys now!” Wade shouted.
“What? Wade? What’s going on?” Lavon quickly became worried at the tone in Wade’s voice.
“Just-” Wade didn’t continue as the door finally gave way.
“The hell is going on?!” Lavon shouted.
Wade dropped his phone, ignoring Lavon and ran towards Zoe.
“Zoe? Can you hear me? Can you open your eyes for me, sweetheart?”
Lavon stayed on the line, listening.
“Zoe?” That’s when Wade noticed the open bottle of Advil. Some pills were still in the bottle, and some were on the floor, but not enough to match the number of pills on the label.
“No no no no no!!! Come on, Zoe! Wake up f’me, yeah?” Wade started shaking Zoe, but she didn’t make a sound.
“LAVON!!!” Wade screamed, and Lavon took off, running faster than he ever had as a line-backer.
“Come on, darlin’.” Wade sobbed. “Don’t do this. Please.” The words were barely audible.
He picked her up and rushed to the bathroom. He grabbed her toothbrush, turned on the shower, then sat on the floor with Zoe between his legs in front of him.
“This is gonna be hell, sweetheart. I’m sorry.”
With shaky hands, Wade put the base of the toothbrush to the back of Zoe’s throat, trying to trigger her gag reflex.
“Come on, come on, come on,” Wade muttered to himself. “Please!” He begged. “Don’t take her, too. Not her,” he prayed.
fin