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Chris Redfield... A legend in the BSAA. Yet, I've seen him at his lowest. Brought him back to his senses... Yet, here we are now.
Under water, who knows how many miles. All I know is that, I'm turning, and my dear Captain is in denial.
Oh, how I admire him... Three years serving with him... First Merah saving me... Now me saving him... I do not wish to guilt him for his survival. But, I'm fading... And he's our- my, only hope.
He'll carry on my spirit, conviction and hopes.
Closing my eyes to distract myself from those thoughts doesn't help.
I feel his strong arms around me, as he desperately drags me to the escape pods. He's stubborn even now.
His voice, is gentler than usual. He keeps repeating to himself that I'll be fine.
He's trying to convince himself of that.
I've always known what I felt was beyond admiration and respect for My Captain.
He made breathing easier. He knew exactly what I was thinking. Chris Redfield always had a magnetizing aura. But, to me, he was everything. He is my goal, my hope and future. My heart.
I love him... Gosh, I do... His constant comfort after Merah's death? His reassurance that I deserved to live?
And now... I'm going to inflict the same pain to him that happened to me. How can I?
'He has no one!' my mind screamed at me. But, if I get in... I'll kill him for sure. This virus will take my mind before help reaches us.
So, I cannot get in that escape pod with him. I'll kill him. I know I will.
"I'm sorry Captain... I did it for the BSAA... For the future..."
I meant that... But, he doesn't know... He is my future, a future I'll have to miss out.
Oh, Chris... Maybe in another life, I'll be captain and you'll be enjoying your retirement.
I'm sorry.
But, let me be selfish one last time.
It would've taken a great portion of my strength before pushing Captain into that pod, but, with the mutation it felt easy.
Too easy.
'Don't look at me with those eyes' Chris' beautiful eyes weren't meant to shed tears for me.
Especially for me in this state. I am a monster.
I feel my mind slipping away, his face did he always look this young? I'm sorry Captain.
I can't make a sound... I still have so much to tell you... But, I'll guess I'll miss out on that too.
As long as you are alive and safe, Captain... Then I have no regrets.
Live a long life, Chris Redfield.
I'll wait for you, just, don't join me too soon.
I'll always love you.
Piers Nivans - K.I.A. - 1986-1st July 2013
End