Chapter Text
Starlight doesn't remember when the general feeling of unease started, it was like being hyper-aware of everything but dozing off a lot at the same time, it just felt weird.
And while she couldn't really tell what she was feeling, she knew the trigger however— and confusingly, it was spending time with her best friend, Trixie. Nothing changed with Trixie, really. Aside from the whole saving Equestria together thing— but their friendship stayed relatively the same. And that's what was confusing Starlight the most.
Trixie was the same as always, boastful, arrogant, considerate and sweet at times… nothing new there. But every time they spent time together, Starlight felt… Off.
Again, she felt hyper-aware. Of her breathing, where her hands were positioned when they were talking— or basically keeping track of her words and being extra careful with them. Which was weird, because it's Trixie. She's the last person Starlight would ever walk on eggshells around. Trixie clearly never does around Starlight.
Starlight sighed, twirling the quill in her hand that she's been staring at for the past Celestia knows how long while trying to think. And it seemed like she'd been staring off into space long enough for Twilight— who was previously overly absorbed with this new spell the two were working on together — to notice and to worry.
"Starlight? Are you okay?" Twilight asked, her voice laced with concern as she rested the book she was holding to the table.
"Huh? Oh— yeah! Sorry. I'm fine." She was obviously not fine as she continued to stare off into space.
Twilight was rightfully concerned. She wasn't an expert at reading other people— but she can clearly tell there was something bothering Starlight. And as her mentor, Twilight wanted to help her in anyway she can. Twilight pondered her words for a moment, before finally finding the right words and opening her mouth to speak— not before being cut off by the woman sitting across from her.
"Do you ever get a weird feeling when you're hanging out with your friends?" Starlight asked, still focused on the quill. Twilight was almost curious as to what was interesting about the quill, but decided that it probably wasn't the quill itself Starlight was focused on. Twilight shared the same habit of course, as Spike pointed out previously— when consumed with her thoughts, the real world was practically considered a distraction and she'd just block it out but use some sort of fidget to seem as if she was still present.
But quill and thoughts aside… Twilight raised her eyebrow at Starlight.
"Is this about Trixie?" Twilight asked, slightly confused. Twilight didn't like Trixie, but Starlight liked her and vice versa, so what can she do but be supportive of her student? And the question itself seemed to confuse her in general, Starlight likes Trixie— but who else would she be talking about? Sunburst? They haven't hung out face-to-face in a while though, unless Starlight met up with him in secret, which is just unlikely since Starlight would immediately tell Twilight about anything in regards to her friends— maybe…
"I—" Starlight paused, "I think so?" She stopped fiddling with the quill. "No— I mean, yes. It is about her." Starlight shook her head before sighing and resting it on the table— it's cold surface a slight distraction from the thoughts in her head.
"I just— I've been feeling weird- acting weird around her and I have no idea why!" Her voice was muffled by the crystal table, though her frustration leaked out as clear as day.
A friendship problem? Twilight tilted her head to signify confusion, pondering on what to say or what to make of Starlight's words.
"Weird… how, exactly?"
"I don't know anymore…" Starlight's voice lowered in resignation.
"Like— I just get so hyper-aware of everything I do around her. And I just don't get it!" Starlight moved her head to just rest her chin on the table instead of her full face and met Twilight's eyes, who seemed to be as clueless on this as she was. Starlight sighed before sitting upright, though still resting her elbow on the table and her head on her hand.
"It's like… I get… self-conscious? Which is weird, because it's Trixie we're talking about."
"And every time she gets close to me— it's like.. whoa. You know?" Starlight motioned with her hands as if it could provide any clue as to what she could mean— and it didn't really work.
"I'm sorry, but I don't know…" Twilight shook her head sadly, slightly disappointing at herself for not being able to understand her own student. Starlight didn't blame Twilight, however. Since she herself was barely grasping at straws trying to understand what this feeling was when it came to Trixie.
"It's nothing negative— I know when I feel annoyed and stuff, but this is… odd."
"It feels warm? But nerve-wracking at the same time. It's weird. Even thinking about her makes the feeling come back." Starlight muttered that last part. Starlight could feel heat rising to her face. Maybe she's sick? A fever? That could explain the weird feeling.
"And it's worse because for some reason, I just can't stop thinking about her."
"You have any idea on what this could be?" Starlight met Twilight's eyes, practically pleading at her mentor to have any sort of answer to what's been plaguing her this whole week or two.
Twilight furrowed her brows in contemplation, surely there was something to explain it. Her student was struggling for Celestia's sake— as her mentor, it's her duty to help her student out in any way she can, even- no, especially when it comes to difficult emotions. The two stayed silent for just a beat, before it was broken by a small groan of the door and a familiar set of footsteps walking towards the pair— his body barely visible with the books he was carrying towering over him.
"You know, it sound's like someone's got a crush." Spike stated matter of factly— so casually in fact, that the pair barely even registered what he said. It took a moment before the two finally processed his words.
"What." Starlight blanked out, looking over at the small dragon dusting his hands after placing down the pile of books near the table.
"Spike!" Twilight called out, her tone was slightly harsh but it was more of shock than anything else, really.
"Crush? What do you mean Crush? Me? On— on Trixie? Her— Me? What?!" Starlight fumbled over her words— the heat in her face growing. Crush? Wait? Isn't that the whole dating thing? Wait— me and-? Huh? Trixie?! Well, she didn't mind the idea of them— Wait- WHAT?!
"Whoa relax! I was just joking! A little..." Spike chuckled awkwardly— realizing he messed up.
"I mean… isn't it obvious?" He raised his eyebrow at the two women in front of him, his hand resting on the back of his neck. No, seriously, it's so obvious. Spike thought, but he decided not to say that out loud.
Starlight looked over to Twilight, slightly desperate as to finding some sort of other explanation— but Twilight could provide no reassurance, only a small shrug and a confused look on her face.
"Wow. For the two smartest people in Equestria, I though you two would figure this out easily." Spike sighed, before standing on one of the books to better match the pair's height as he began to explain the phenomena called "having a crush on somebody".
Twilight was honestly shocked with Spike's small 'lesson'. He was surprisingly a good teacher, and a lot of his points did match what Starlight was talking about. Twilight felt a bit of pride as Spike was able to take initiative and teach the two knowledge they seem to be lacking of. Sure, Twilight was the princess of friendship— but romance seems to have a different plane of understanding she was yet to fully grasp. Honestly, she didn't even think about it before. Mostly focused on magic research and friendship, so this was quite the eye-opener. She might have to do more research on this particular topic after. Maybe talking with Cadence could provide some useful insight? Being the princess of love and all.
Twilight was intrigued, but it seemed that Starlight was… not taking it too well.
"No… I just— it fits perfectly well! But… No- no no no. Wouldn't that— oh dear Celestia." Starlight paced around the room as she continued to ponder over her thoughts. Her thoughts coming out half-finished and barely coherent to those outside of her brain, aka, everybody except her. It was like her brain was put into overdrive at the mere thought of having a crush on Trixie, and it didn't help with her initial feelings when thinking about anything regarding Trixie.
"Have you two seriously never had a crush on anyone before?" Spike asked, genuinely curious. "I mean— I know Twilight never had any, I would know. But I'm surprised you haven't Starlight."
"Well, I was too busy enslaving a town to focus on any romance in my life after all." Starlight joked, awkwardly laughing as if that was gonna help with her nerves in any way shape or form.
"Yeah, I remember that." Spike huffed as he dragged a nearby seat closer to their table before sitting down. This was probably something he should take a seat for. Knowing the two women, they're so gonna treat this like some sort of research project. Or not. It's a gamble with these two.
"So… Starlight has a crush on Trixie?" Twilight asked, her words slightly dragged out as if she was testing the waters— still a bit confused but finally getting the hang of things.
"Seems like it. Honestly I was starting to wonder when you guy's would realize. It was so obvious." Twilight raised an eyebrow at spike, giving him a look that probably meant something along the lines of 'tone it down' or something.
"What? I'm just telling the truth!" Spike countered, he was about to continue pleading his case before Starlight cut him off.
"No no, he's— he's right. I think I might… like Trixie… in that way." Starlight nodded, a sigh leaving her lips— a mix of confusion, frustration, and realization. Truly a mixed bundle of weird emotions she hasn't felt in a long while— or ever, really.
"But she's… how..? Ugh dear Celestia help me." Starlight sat down on her seat before slumping once again on the cold crystal table. Twilight and Spike exchanging looks of concern for the troubled purple haired woman in front of them.
"Maybe you could… talk to her about it?" Twilight suggested, though she still continued to rack her brain for something else that could possibly help Starlight in her predicament. Honestly, Twilight really didn't understand the feeling, and was still slightly confused on why Starlight would gain a crush on Trixie of all people, but things happen.
Starlight simply responded with a hum— which was muffled once again by the table. Though Twilight has never felt this way for anyone, she can still see that her friend is troubled and needed support. And what do good friends do in this situation? Give them support, of course.
"Starlight, you do know that whatever you decide to do, Spike and I— and the others, will support you one hundred percent." Spike nodded in agreement, offering a small pat on the head for Starlight.
"Yeah.. I know.. and thank you Twilight… and Spike. Really." Starlight sat upright once more, a smile of genuine gratitude on her face.
"How about we take a break from all this and you can get some rest? I'm sure this spell can wait." Twilight smiled, putting a bookmark in the book in front of her before closing it— using her magic to place it on it's designated spot in the big shelf surrounding the room.
"I'll take you up on that offer." Starlight could feel the heat in her face cooling down just a little. Her thoughts getting a bit quieter. It was nice to have people looking out for her like this. "I'll just be in my room if you guys need me." She stood up from her seat and left the room, looking back just once and smiling at the two before exiting the room fully.
Twilight and Spike sat in the room in silence for a moment or two, Twilight more on waiting for her student to be out of earshot. And as soon as Starlight was, Twilight immediately scanned the shelves for books on things like romance.
"Well Spike, I think we need to talk about how you know all this." Twilight had that look in her face, the same look that meant…
"Let me guess. Research?" Spike raised an eyebrow, slightly exasperated and confused on Twilight's enthusiasm on the topic— but it's Twilight.
"Exactly! Now let me go get my quill—"
Spike groaned as he slumped in his seat. So much for just a quick input.