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The Crusader infantry dropped onto the grass wherever they could find space, some pulled off their helmets and wiped sweat from their faces
Nearby, men laughed and spoke of victory, even thought they were tired " They won't be coming back " one soldier was heard chuckling
Around them, shields rested on the ground and everyone was mounted off the horse. King Baldwin IV sat among his knights, his face hidden by the gray mask
The king lifted his head, something moved in the distance
The knight noticed and his hand tightened around his sword " My King...." he whispered. Farther away, thousand of spears could be seen and men riding horses
An entire army was coming towards them slowly, but not just any army, the Saladin's army
Panic happend before the enemy even reached them, men began to look for their shields. Others searched for the weapons they had dropped
Arrows were being shot, one struck a soldier through the throat and collapsed without a sound. Baldwin's bodyguards closed around him " Protect his Majesty! "
The king tried to rise, holding the arm of a knight beside him, but he was slow, the leprosy catching up with him
Another knight raised his hands, just as a spear was given into his chest, the force threw him backward into the mud, dead
The knight dropped to one knee before Baldwin " My king! " and without hesitation, Baldwin was lifted onto the man's back and onto the horse
The field Marj Ayyun began immediately filled with dead bodies, screams and prayers to God
It became clear that this was no longer a safe place for anyone to stay, especially for the civilians and families who were just trying to survive
Some civilians were caught in the battle and lost their lives as they tried to escape. Others, however, were lucky enough to find a way out
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A knock on the door was heard. I frowned and buried my face deeper into the pillows. " Lady ? "
For a moment, I stayed where I was, beneath the warm blanket, groaning
Another knock " Lady, are you awake ? "
Slowly, I opened my eyes, unfortunately, nobody cared that I wished to stay there all day. With a sigh, I pushed the blankets aside and sat up, rubbing my eyes with my hands " Come in "
A maid entered and hurried toward the curtains. With a pull, she opened them wider and left
For a brief moment, I considered climbing right back into bed but Sibylla would be awake soon and there was work to do
Forcing myself up, I crossed the room and splashed cold water over my face. I dried my face quickly before reaching for my dress and doing my hair
I hurried down the corridor, there were servants carrying baskets of laundry or food. I moved quickly through the familiar halls until I reached Lady Sibylla's rooms
The guards standing outside the entrance gave small nods as I passed. The outer room smelled of lavender and one maid knelt, sweeping the floor with a cloth
Near the windows, a younger servant stood on her toes, trying to close the curtains despite her quite small height
My eyes moved around the room, the water basin stood near the dressing table. Crossing the room, I bent slightly and checked the water temperature and it was neither too cold but neither too warm, perfect
The table was clear, fresh towels waited where they should, nothing seemed in any wrong order
For a moment, my eyes turned toward the door of Lady Sibylla's bedchamber. Beyond that door she was still sleeping while servants prepared everything she would need before she even opened her eyes
I looked down at my hands. What would it feel like, I wondered, to stay in bed and waking up with everything prepared ?
I sighed, crossing the room, stopping before the bedchamber door. My hand rose and three soft knocks sounded " Lady Sibylla ? "
For a moment there was only silence. I waited then I carefully opened the door and stepped inside
The room was dim, heavy curtains covered the windows and Sibylla remained curled beneath the blankets
Stepping quietly across the room, I reached for the curtains and opened them, the room brightened at once and a quiet groan came from her
I turned with a small smile " Good morning, my lady " and I watched her struggle to wake up
In the meantime, my thoughts drifted far away. I wonder where my Baldwin was at this very moment, would he be awake already ?
Was he safe ? Would he return from his journey and when he would return ?
I did not notice Sibylla watching me " My dear "
I blinked, Sibylla had pushed herself up against the headboard of the bed, her eyes fixed on me " What are you thinking about ? "
I looked away " Nothing important, my lady "
" You always say that.. " she smiled
A knock came at the door before I could answer, one of the other ladies in waiting, which was Miriam, entered holding the basin " Good morning, Lady Sibylla "
She placed it on the low stand near the bed and stepped back, lowering her head
I took a clean cloth, dipping it into the warm water, the cloth darkened as it soaked then I washed off the excess of water from it
I knelt beside Sibylla and the warm cloth brushed across her forehead first, them cheeks and neck. As soon as I finished one area, I reached for a dry cloth and gently dried her skin
" There...was a messenger yesterday " she broke the silence, her smile fading
" What news did he bring, my lady ? "
Sibylla took a breath " The messenger said the army believed they had won " and I lifted my eyes to her when she said that " The men stopped to rest, then....then Saladin's army attacked "
I swallowed, stopping what I was doing
" They were attacked suddenly " she said, her eyes lowering for a brief moment before returning to me " he said it was unexpected… they were not ready "
My stomach tightened " What about the King ? " and this time the question escaped before I could stop it
" The messanger did not know everything " Sibylla added, her tone softer now " he saw it from a distance, and he had to leave.... he could not have remained in the battlefield as a simple civilian "
My heart had already started to beat faster, and a question came back again, impossible to ignore
Is he still alive?
I forced myself to look down at the basin instead of Sibylla, because if I looked at her any longer, I thought she might see everything I was trying so hard to hold inside
" He is still alive " she said, as if saying it could make it true " My brother is strong..."
I carried the basin and cloth back, placing them carefully before reaching for Sibylla's red gown
Behind me, I heard her rise from the bed " You are worrying yourself sick already " she said
" How can I not ? " and I turned toward her, helping her dress
" You love him " She answered quietly
The truth was, there was no reason denying it. She had known this for a long time and never had never spoken a word of it to anyone
Over time I realized that she loved her own brother, as long as nobody wished to use him, control him or take advantage of him
And somehow, over the years, she had come to trust me as I trusted her
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The gates of Beaufort Castle closed behind the last of the riders. The battle was over and the field of Marj Ayyun far behind
King Baldwin IV sat carefully upon a wooden bench near the wall of the castle, after all what happend, his body was drained of all the strenght
Yet before anyone could tell him to rest, he lifted his head " Where is Sir Rainald ? " he asked
The knight who had carried him through the battle stepped forward
" You saved my life "
The knight immediately lowered his head respectfully " It was my duty, Your Majesty "
"You have my thanks, you will be rewarded greatly for your service "
Around them, wounded men were being carried across the courtyard while servants hurried between them with cloths and water
One soldier cried out as an arrow was pulled from his shoulder
For the first time since arriving at Beaufort, his thoughts went somewhere else, to her
He wondered where she was at this very moment, perhaps helping Sibylla prepare for the day
For a moment he wished he could leave the castle immediately and go back to her
But the war losses were greatly
So many hearts and lives were lost, gone before the sunset and gone before they could return home. Most men had families and those families would not have a father coming back for them
Yet they laid into the ground now, slowly becoming only numbers for future historians to write down
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The king has returned
The news spread thought Jerusalem faster than the speed of light. He is alive and has come back home
I heard about this hours ago and ever since then, I had not been able to keep my thoughts still along with my enthusiasm
I wondered if he thought of me, if he slept at all, if he had any injuries and what actually happend at the battle
The questions followed me everywhere. By the time evening came over Jerusalem and most of the palace would get ready to sleep, I could no longer sit still
Lady Sibylla's letter was in my hands as I walked, beside it a small carved box she had asked me to bring to him
The palace seemed larger and emptier in a way. The closer I came to the King's chambers, the harder my heart seemed to beat
Two guards stood outside the Baldwin's chambers. Both straightened the moment they saw me approaching and looked straightforward at me
" My lady... " One of them replied polite " The King is resting, the physicians have ordered that he should not be disturbed "
" Lady Sibylla asked me to bring these " I replied, trying to keep my excitement off my face " I will...I will not stay " I said, words coming faster now, because the need to see him was immense " Give me a minute "
After a long pause, he finally stepped aside just enough to let me pass, sighing
I opened the door softly and closed it, I crossed the room quickly and placed the letter and the small wrapped gift down on a table surface
I turned and I saw him, laying in bed sleeping, his body resting under thick covers. I came until I was standing beside the bed, close enough that I could see the rise and fall of his chest
A small smile came to my lips before I even realized it
I sat at the edge of the bed, my hand lifted without hesistation, touching the cheek of his gray mask, careful to not press too hard
His eyes opened a little, heavy with sleep, he reached out slowly and found my wrist where it rested near his cheek
" I am… " he began, his voice rough from exhaustion " I am glad to see you "
Before I could answer, the door behind me opened and I turned to look. The guard entered slightly " You said a minute....- "
" She can stay " Baldwin said simply
" As you command, your majesty..." and the door closed again
" I missed you " I said at least, leaning closer, bending down and pressed a small, careful kiss against his forehead, instead of his skin feeling the material of the mask
I pulled back sligthly " Are you alright now? " I asked quietly
A faint, tired smile came upon his face " I have been throught worse, my dear... " and his hand come to my cheek, sensing the soft material of his white gloves
" I have lost " he said lower, his light blue eyes did not leave mine while he spoke " I saw too many men fall and too many I could not bring back....."
" I should have done more " he added quietly " I should have thought better... "
" No " and I shaked my head. My hand moved to cover his, holding it gently against my face, keeping it there, refusing to let him pull away
He looked like he did not fully trust what he was hearing
" You did what you could " I continued, leaning closer " and I still love you "
His expression softened at my words " My sweetheart... "
" You know.." I said quietly, smiling " Life is like… sometimes you rise, and sometimes you fall, but you must always rise up "
And I wished, in this moment, that I could do more than hold his hand, I wished that I was able to kiss him on the lips
" I think…" he paused, his words sincere " You are the only person who looks at me and sees more than a King and ill man.... and...and I thank you for this "
And I climbed onto the bed beside him, laying myself down into the space next to his body
His head turned slightly toward me, my eyes began to feel heavy with sleep without warning but I tried to keep them open
I wanted to say something but my eyes closed for a second
And just before sleep took me fully, I heard his voice
" Good night....my angel "
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