Work Text:
Cause I’ll make you forget
The time you stressed about your 9-5
Pick you up in style
You’re sexy and you’re worth my while
I wanna take you out sometime
‘Sushi’ – FKA Twigs
The file was going to take one hour to download. Remus sighed, pushing his reading glasses up his nose and reclining on his pillows. It wasn’t everyday you found a virus-free full DLC version of the Sims 4. He could practically feel the giddiness building beneath his skin as he imagined creating his household, himself and Robert Pattinson with three cats and a horse.
He guiltily glanced at the files he was supposed to be looking at for work, ignored in favour of a well-needed day off.
His office job was definitely not a choice of passion. It was more like the only available position that didn’t require 2 hours of commute; and who was he to complain? That’s not to say, however, that he was particularly attached to overworking himself for the sake of his coworkers. A man had to have priorities, after all.
The file opened in a heavenly flash of white light– the neon Sims logo reflecting in his glasses like a pile of dollar bills. Remus could’ve drooled. The recognisable Sims music played as he excitedly clicked the button labeled New Game. He could see it now: him and Robert in a city apartment. He would spend at least 3 hours building the thing, and it would be glorious.
The doorbell rang as he prepared to pick out his own haircut. It was curious, really, he wasn’t expecting anyone. He looked down at his lime green pyjama shorts and white t-shirt with a triangular pizza stain. His laundry basket was being pointedly ignored in the corner.
The sun painted the entryway pink as he approached, his day off mournfully approaching its end.
“Hello?”
Before him was an Adonis, a relic of another time. All high cheekbones and stormy eyes, with a tight bun and a stern expression. A tight blue police uniform threatened to burst around defined biceps, bulging as the man’s arms remained crossed over his chest. Remus promptly swallowed the spit building in his mouth, worry building in his gut as he remembered the file he had just illegally downloaded a mere hour ago.
“You sir, are under arrest–”
Remus couldn’t ruminate on his honeyed voice for too long, as he promptly jumped to an explanation: “I can explain! Listen it’s not what it looks like– I don’t usually pirate things. Really– I was just being a bit indulgent! I mean…”
He trailed off as the officer looked at him with a confused smile, stepping closer into the messy flat.
“I see you’re going to need some closer inspection…”
Remus blanched. This was it. He was going to jail. After so many years of being a law-abiding citizen, this little misdemeanour would be his end. He thought about the thin mattresses, and beefy hardened criminals with face tattoos– okay that was horribly presumptuous. Perhaps the criminals would be sweet; young men suffering the injustice of a system designed to fail them.
Yes– Remus would go to prison and find himself lucky to be surrounded by upstanding citizens. He would eat powdered mashed potatoes and preserved beef jerky… for breakfast.
The police officer looked around his flat, probably noting the dreary lack of decoration and the empty pizza box on his coffee table. He frowned, eyebrows furrowed in thought, before putting on a wide grin and pushing Remus onto the beige couch.
“Officer I’m really sorry about all of this– I’m sure we can come to some kind of understanding–” Remus was set to puke up his pizza if this got much further. He looked up at the cop, who seemed to be sporting a salacious grin? No, that couldn’t be right. Perhaps he was taking pity on Remus.
He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like ‘One of those roleplay guys’ before leaning over and dragging broad hands over lime pyjama short-clad thighs. Was the officer groping him? Indignation rose in Remus’s stomach as he quickly scrambled away from the beautiful man.
“Officer! That cannot be legal!” He exclaimed, bending his knees to hide the beginnings of an incriminating– even more incriminating– boner.
The man jumped away, face flushed and looking almost shocked. His police badge glinted in the pink window light, a cheeky dog imprinted in the fake gold. Huh. Remus didn’t know the precinct was dog themed.
“Okay, mate, what the fuck is going on?” He said, that deep voice sending shivers down Remus’s spine.
“What’s going on!? You’re the one trying to– to arrest me all sexy like!”
The man’s eyes widened– that deep blue-grey contrasting ravishingly with dark furrowed brows. He crossed his arms, taking a step back from the couch.
“What are you talking about!? You hired me!” He seemed to be looking anywhere but at Remus, eyes catching on what Remus knew to be his bedroom door. Remus felt himself flush, both confused and shamefully aroused.
“Hired you?” He asked, trying and failing to maintain a neutral tone.
“Are you not David Crowley? The guy with the cop kink?” The man replied, almost whispering and looking at his boots.
“What!? No! I’m Remus Lupin, I would never have a cop kink,” He paused, taking a good look at the man before him. Realisation dawned on him as the man barked a surprised laugh.
“Alright Remus Lupin, Sirius Black,” He looked Remus up and down, mirth and what looked like embarrassment swimming in his eyes, “Stripper.”
“Oh,” He looked up at Sirius, a tentative smile taking up his face, “So what I’m hearing is that I’m not under arrest?”
Another laugh, loud and free, “If I had the authority to do that, not that I’d want it, it wouldn’t be wasted on cute game pirates.”
Sims music was still playing in the background as they shared a shy smile. Remus was about to offer tea before Sirius let out a loud sigh.
“As much as I’d love to continue this discussion, I do actually have a gig to get to.” Sirius said, sounding almost regretful.
“Right.” Remus prepared himself to never see Sirius again, taking him in before he left.
“How would you like to continue this? Over coffee?” He asked, light eyes twinkling and looking much too earnest. He was standing near the door, preparing to leave, and he looked like a dream come to life.
Agreeing to coffee with Sirius had to be the easiest decision Remus would take in his life.